You Don't Mess With the Zohan trailer online

[terry78]

Eh, I'm thinking under-15 or brain-damaged.

That still guarantees a break even, sadly.

 

[Catman]

http://www.avclub.com/content/interview/robert_smigel

 

[GhostPoet]

After reading more about it...it sounds like the trailers are nothing like the movie.

It sounds like an overly dumbed down comedy that uses physical gags and crude humor to pass as funny...

no thanks

 

[hpwiz89]

This movie looks so stupid...

 

[tzarinna]

I love all the TV Spots, all the pelvic grinding cracks me up.

 

[The Apatow Crew]

I will be seeing this movie. i like the sandman.

 

[fu manchu]

After reading more about it...it sounds like the trailers are nothing like the movie.

It sounds like an overly dumbed down comedy that uses physical gags and crude humor to pass as funny...

well, it is a Adam Sandler movie.....so it shouldn't be surprise.

I love all the TV Spots, all the pelvic grinding cracks me up.

i love the split screens with Baron Davis. it makes me laugh every time.

 

[terry78]

You Don't Mess With Zohan


// / June 6, 2008

Cast & CreditsZohan: Adam Sandler
The Phantom: John Turturro
Dalia: Emmanuelle Chriqui
Gail: Lainie Kazan
Salim: Rob Schneider
Mrs. Greenhouse: Charlotte Rae
Kevin: Kevin Nealon
Walbridge: Michael Buffer

Columbia Pictures presents a film directed by Dennis Dugan. Written by Adam Sandler, Robert Smigel and Judd Apatow. Running time: 94 minutes. Rated PG-13 (for crude and sexual content throughout). Opening today at local theaters.


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By Roger Ebert

The crowd I joined for "You Don't Mess With the Zohan" roared with laughter, and I understand why. Adam Sandler's new comedy is shameless in its eagerness to extract laughs from every possible breach of taste or decorum, and why am I even mentioning taste and decorum in this context? This is a mighty hymn of and to vulgarity, and either you enjoy it, or you don't. I found myself enjoying it a surprising amount of the time, even though I was thoroughly ashamed of myself. There is a tiny part of me that still applauds the great minds who invented the whoopee cushion.

Sandler plays an ace agent for the Mossad, the Israeli secret police; he has no interest in counter-terrorism and spends as much time as possible hanging out with babes on the beach. Known as the Zohan, he has remarkable physical skills -- and equipment, as his bikini briefs and the crotches of all his costumes make abundantly clear. The laws of gravity do not limit him; he can travel through cities like Spider-Man but without the web strings. He can simply jump for hundreds of feet.

The Zohan harbors one secret desire. He wants to be a hairdresser. His equivalent of pornography is an old Paul Mitchell catalog, and one day he simply cuts his ties with Israel and smuggles himself into the United States in a crate carrying two dogs whose hair he does en route. In America, he poses as an Australian with a very peculiar accent, and when asked for his name, combines the names of his airborne flight buddies: Scrappy Coco. His auditions in various hair salons are unsuccessful (in a black salon, he attacks a dreads wig as if it were a hostile animal), until finally he is hired by the beautiful Dalia (Emmanuelle Chriqui), a Palestinian.

This plot is simply the skeleton for sight gags. Early on, we saw how much pain he could endure when he dropped a sharp-toothed fish into the crotch of his bikini swimming trunks. Now we see such sights as his sexual adventures with old ladies in the salon. In my notes, I scribbled in the dark: "An angel with the flexibility of a circus freak," adding, "he tells old lady," although maybe the old lady told him. At home with a new friend (Rob Schneider as an Arab cabdriver), he effortlessly seduces the friend's mother (the zaftig Lainie Kazan).

His archenemy, the Palestinian agent known as the Phantom (John Turturro), is also in New York, and they make war. The Phantom's training regime is severe. He takes eggs, cracks them and live chicks emerge. These he puts in a glass and chugs. He punches not only sides of beef but a living cow. Like the Zohan, he is filled with confidence in his own abilities, and with reason (he can cling to ceilings). Their confrontation will be a battle of the Middle-Eastern superheroes.

Now creeps in a belated plot, involving a shady developer (Michael Buffer, of "let's get ready to rumble!" fame). He wants to tear down a street of Arab and Israeli electronics stores and falafel and hummus shops to put up a mall. This would be a terrible thing, particularly given the prominent role that hummus plays in the film. Opposition to the mall unites the Israelis and Arabs, unconvincingly, on the way to peace and brotherhood at the end.

There are scenes here that make you wince. One involves a savage game of hacky-sack using not a hacky-sack bag but a living cat. Only the consolation that it's done with special effects allows us to endure the cries of the cat. Mariah Carey appears, starts to sing "The Star-Spangled Banner" and somehow survives a cameo with the mall builder. (Maybe his contract stipulates that Buffer must appear in all movies involving the National Anthem.) And something must be said about the Zohan's speech, which in addition to the broad comic accent, involves the word "no" in a series that can run from two ("no-no!") to his usual five ("no-no-no-no-no!") to the infinite.

Sandler works so hard at this, and so shamelessly, that he battered down my resistance. Like a Jerry Lewis out of control, he will do, and does, anything to get a laugh. No thinking adult should get within a mile of this film. I must not have been thinking. For my sins, I laughed. Sorry. I'll try to do better next time.

 

[The Apatow Crew]

That's not very nice roger!

 

[Catman]

I wanted to like this movie. I really did. I saw the trailers and thought, "this movie looks awesome." It wasn't. The beginning was awesome. In fact, everything leading up to him getting work at the beauty salon was great. Then, it just falls apart. None of the characters are developed. And there wasn't much of a story. All he does is cut hair and **** the women. Yea, its funny at first but it gets old very quick. While Zohan is doing his **** at the salon there's this sub-plot about a real estate developer trying to destroy the neighborhood and build a mall. VERY cliche'.

So...in conclusion...meh.

 

[The Apatow Crew]

Which means people will like it then. Cause they like meh stuff.

I wanna see it though i like Sandler.

 

[Raiden]

I think Panda will beat Zohan this week.

 

[The Apatow Crew]

I think Panda will beat Zohan this week.

It's a given its a kids movie. But i'm sure it will be close though.

 

[Catman]

I think Panda will beat Zohan this week.

It's a given its a kids movie. But i'm sure it will be close though.

Nah. If Chuck and Larry barely made 40 million this will make like 30-35 million. Panda will probably open with ATLEAST 70 million.

 

[The Apatow Crew]

Nah. If Chuck and Larry barely made 40 million this will make like 30-35 million. Panda will probably open with ATLEAST 70 million.

you don't know especially with the way this years box officer has been as of late.

 

[MightyGuy]

This movie could be funny but I'm hoping the trailer didn't give away the best parts. I think I'll chance it and check it out.

 

[amazingfantasy15]

you don't know especially with the way this years box officer has been as of late.

What's been so surprising about the box office? I was surprising at how well Iron Man did thought it might be around $60-70 mil, never though $100 mil, but everything else seems about right.

 

[bingy13]

Yeah... This was one of the worst movies I've seen this year. Can't even slightly recommend this. Everyone I work with that watched this basically came to the conclusion, "Wow! People actually paid millions of dollars to make this, and people are going to actually spend money to watch this! Wow!"

Bottom Ten of the Year
Semi-Pro 29-Feb-08 4.5/10
Drillbit Taylor 21-Mar-08 4.5/10
What Happens in Vegas 9-May-08 4.0/10
Fool's Gold 8-Feb-08 4.0/10
Jumper 14-Feb-08 4.0/10
Superhero Movie 28-Mar-08 4.0/10
The Eye 1-Feb-08 4.0/10
You Don't Mess with the Zohan 6-Jun-08 3.5/10
Prom Night 11-Apr-08 3.0/10
One Missed Call 4-Jan-08 1.0/10

 

[terry78]

^What time do you find time to go see this during work?

 

[bingy13]

I work at a movie theater as assistant manager/projectionist. We previewed it last night.

 

[Catman]

I work at a movie theater as assistant manager/projectionist. We previewed it last night.

Good answer.

 

[Prison Mike]

this movie looks terrible but I'm sure it will do well at the box office. I have no intentions of seeing this in the theaters. Maybe when it hits dvd though.

 

[IRON_Lad]

Sandler hasn't been funny since Little Nicky(2000)

 

[LegendaryCaleb]

i came out of theater today thinking "i want my money back"
2/10

 

[BloodyWolverine]

I saw Panda instead and the kids feel asleep and the parents seemed to like the movie there were even claps at the end and thats the first movie this year besides Iron Man where i heard a clap.