I've said this before but I'll say it again. The only reason the two characters fight is if they don't act like they are suppose to. If Superman acts above Bruce's taunts the fight doesn't happen, if Batman does his research into who Clark is the fight doesn't happen. If they have a 5 mins conversation with one and other the fight doesn't happen. The only way they fight is if neither character is presented in a way that is recognisable and don't converse with one and other, because if they engage with one and other they would realise they share a common goal..............
Reading your original post and my response to it. I don't see why or how we are going here just saying...That is I'm not sure why you quoted me if only to open up a whole other line of conversation and critique. May as well have started a clean post imo. I suppose that is that on that conversation.
An argument on what you are presenting now.
I'd argue that sometimes characters do fight because they don't act like they are suppose to, that's a time honored approach to conflict in narrative. If everyone is rational then many things naturally go differently: If Stark put his vast resources into finding out the truth of the frame job as opposed to waiting till two thirds of the movie to even consider it, if super smart super cool Panther put his vast resources into the same thing... If like Panther, and like he himself stated he himself would not be, Stark didn't simply let revenge take over and be manipulated at the end into killing an innocent man then there would be no fight(literally), If cap turned over Bucky, explaining to keep him truly locked up and why, whilst going on to investigate with his own team rule breaking covert team, then there would be no fight.. All of it proving nothing other than that movies are about humans. When it comes to Stark and T'challa, they are just too driven by vengeance or guilt to even 'research' the truth before first attending to their greater agendas of justice. Point being people fight because they don't act like themselves or are blinded by rage etc, it happens.
When it comes to Heat. All the conversations whether they be 5 mins or 2 hours could be about enacting their agenda(in CW). Applied to BvS it could be an entire 20min conversation but one predicated why the other person is wrong in how they go about justice..etc That wouldn't change anything, and we are given plenty enough to know it's there without the of them also needing to tell each other. If unlike Heat you are talking about a 5min convo during the bvs fight itself with, where superman need only 'explain', you must be because any convo prior to the fight would/could have been agenda trading(as it was). It boils down to Superman not knowing about kryptonite and thinking he could put batman down first, then talk to him at first anyways.. Neither here nor there for I fear you are missing the real workings of the martha revelation. It's not simply that clark has a mother, or her name. Or some "lie" about a women needing rescuing that bruce may or may not beileve(after revealing he knows bruce's identity). If Bruce isn't prepared to listen, the way Stark wasn't to Cap before he 'changed', then it would all be for nothing. The attack on humanity(wayne tower) was similar to T'challa's and from that point on Batman is driven by revenge/anger and there is weight and ignorance to reason. You'll notice if T'challa simply approached the whole thing like he did in the third act, then maybe a 5min convo(in or out of fight) would be received better. Alfred is already 'there' and ready to listen/to give superman a chance, Bruce has to get there. Superman showing up and saying my mother is named martha and that's it, wouldn't end the hate or 'greater good' driven batman in that moment anymore than it would if Faora did the exact same. If it did, then batman changing would be as weak as detractors assert. However it's that they compound and layer the scene with various character driven elements together and actually dramatize the effect not simply reveal info. The humanizing effect on Bruce's perception of superman along with the "what have I become" paradigm shifting moment achieves a catalyst beyond simply doing "research" into superman. A man selfless man's dying pleads are for his mother, something different than a non dying mans words. He's not just 'with lois', zod could be 'with lois' on paper and it mean various things to a paranoid investigator, it's that she's out here in the mud begging for him, confirming his statement. And layered on everything, perhaps paramount; Reliving the experience of a pleading family and a boy crying out for his mother BUT/AND being on the other side of the gun is dramatizing experience, one that batman built his whole life on trying to stop now being given that opportunity to do make it right or make it wrong! That's why that rose bud esque intro is recalled in that moment, of 'revelation'. It took all of that to get batman to where he is ready to listen(it took stark/BP various things). The raising conflict in bvs is about contrasting viewpoints, the fight itself is about one man's view point vs another man being sent to stop batman ala DKR only with real duress and not just being a G-man(weaker). I digress, skipping all of that. If your point is that unlike Heat, fights between characters have to happen in the one way, the way where people simply understand the facts and each other yet don't see eye to eye I'd argue plainly that no, you can have fights happen over simple blinded misunderstandings or lack of understandings as actually happened in both films, or like say Rocky(2) people gain or earn an understanding and form a friendship coming out of it.
In conclusion, some fights happen between people who can lay their cards on the table, some fights happen between people who aren't prepared to listen, some fights happen between someone in need of a existential shift...the list goes on. What they 'attempted' in bvs is different than heat, it involved more and rightly so given the pending friendship and like mindedness we know to be present. Revelation, Paranoia, Existential crisis, Ultimatum, Hubris...they put various things in there and thus they saw it working beyond your slighted description. I'm reminded of Busiek's JLA/Avengers in this way. Anyhow, the style of criticism, where one points to one way of doing something, then argues that it wasn't done, meanwhile failing to properly present what was done...doesn't work.
We've been told Heat had an influence?