Part Die Hard, part Home Alone... but shockingly not at all interesting as that sounds.
It's Santa Claus in a Die Hard scenario where the script isn't nearly as clever or funny as it thinks it is. I will say David Harbour fits the role perfectly and I feel like he's the only one trying in this while everyone else feels like they're in a lesser John Wick movie or in an annoying family drama. Another positive I have is some of the action primarily when they do the Home Alone traps homage which isn't in it enough. Outside of that, I don't think the movie really works. It just plays it safe for the most part and you know exactly how it would end. Overall, it's just alright. 2.5/5
Pretty interesting but flawed. While it's yet another movie about slavery, it's one that centers around the famous photo taken of a former slave with his back mangled and whipped. I thought the beginning was the weakest part of the movie where it goes through the motions that you see in every slavery movie but it slowly changes the moment Will Smith's character is on the run and it becomes a more of genre piece. And then the movie changes again to a war movie and it becomes Gory if it was shot like Hacksaw Ridge. I thought Antoine Fuqua did an amazing job shooting those battle scenes. As for the performances, were mostly mediocre outside of Will Smith, Ben Foster, and Mustafa Shakir who I hope to see more of. Also, the writing isn't as sharp or nuanced as something like 12 Years a Slave and I thought the color grading was a mistake. It almost feels like the editor accidentally left the color opacity at 5% and just ran with it. Overall, it's a cliche slave movie that got better as it went along. 3/5
I thought I'd check out the only James Cameron film I haven't seen after finally watching Piranha II a couple months ago. It's basically Cameron doing both Aliens and Close Encounters of the Third Kind in one movie with a little bit of Jaws thrown in. I thought it started off kinda rough and interestingly enough, you see some of recycled bits he would later use in Avatar. Between filming the sets, the water tank, the CG, and the miniatures, it's technically incredible that he managed to pull this off back in the 80s and you see why filming this would be bad place. My favorite part is easily the story and performances between Ed Harris & Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio who pretty much gave it their all in this. The big scene between them trying to rescue each other is worth seeing alone and it's easily the best scene in the movie. There's a lot of solid supporting characters that I really dug even if it's a retread of Aliens especially Todd Graff & Michael Biehn. Overall, I'm glad I finally caught this and seeing it a remastered format was really worth it. 4.5/5
Bro, not only you don't bet against James Cameron, you especially don't bet against Cameron doing a sequel, bro.
The Way of Water is basically what Terminator 2 did for The Terminator. It follows a similar plot road while amping up every single aspect by making the scale grander and also making the character driven moments way more personal this time around. It also does the thing in Terminator 2 where they will reuse lines and moments but flip them around and change the scenario. The story is very much about refugees, the ocean, and family... which I'm sure is why Vin Diesel is gonna show up in the next movie. There's no denying the technical improvements this has and having Russell Carpenter back as Cameron's cinematographer, the awe-inspiring shots are unlike anything you've seen before and the 3D does improve what you're watching.
While we do get some Jake and Neytiri, they are not necessarily taking up the entire movie. We get way more character development from their children and the tribe that they go to for refuge. Sigourney Weaver as Kiri was a big highlight as well as Britain Dalton as Lo'ak. Stephen Lang's character returns as the big bad yet again and I thought they did a much better job giving him something more interesting to do. While the first couple of hours is more character-driven, the final hour of the movie is James Cameron showing off why he's the best at high-stakes action. Overall, while the only criticism I have is some of the middle was stretched for too long, everything else was exactly what I hoped a James Cameron sequel would be. It takes the big blockbuster template and pushes the boundaries of what is possible with easily the best CGI you'll see on screen and especially delivering on the emotions. Without a doubt one of the best movies of the year. 5/5
This was a very fascinating slow burn horror film that uses awkward social interactions as a driving force for the plot. It centers around a Danish family and a Dutch family that became vacation friends and things go awry when one gets invited to the other's house. It's a movie that lives off of microaggressions and neurotic behavior that takes you on a bizarre journey that gets aggressively more unhinged. The last 30 minutes is where things go off the rail and it's a combination of Funny Games and The Strangers but not as good as those films. Overall, it's a solid film that I kinda wish had more and kinda wish had more self preservation even though I get what it's trying to say. I feel like Coming Home in the Dark is an even better version of this movie. 3.5/5
This has big "corporations are people too" energy.
It's a Christmas musical that takes A Christmas Carol and gets a modern makeover while also trying to be a comedy featuring Will Ferrell and Ryan Reynolds. Without question, it felt like an algorithm made this. While I do appreciate Will Ferrell and Ryan Reynolds not doing their typical obnoxious comedy routine, I don't think anything they're doing here is remotely interesting and when they are doing their comedy it almost never lands for me. Octavia Spencer pretty much plays the same kind of character she's been playing for years. It doesn't help that the movie breaks into song every five minutes and the musical acts themselves are incredibly generic and boring. The only person that kept me awake through this was Sunita Mani who plays Ghost of Christmas Past. She has some of the only decent moments in the movie and I guess I'm glad she's getting more high-profile work. Overall, it's a no from me dawg. 1.5/5
Farkus growing up to be a cop couldn't be more appropriate.
As cynical as it is cashing in on a "years later" sequel to one of the most overplayed Christmas movies, it's surprisingly well-made and captures the spirit of the original to a decent degree. While it doesn't completely work, it does a good job continuing the story where it centers on Raphie as a parent and all the hijinks that ensue of him trying to celebrate Christmas without the Old Man. I will say they don't give the kids that much to do but Erinn Hayes who plays the wife was really good. They recast the mom and got Julie Hagerty who without question steals the movie. She was pretty much doing her Airplane route but as a chaotic grandma. I will say can tell this was clearly shot on a movie lot, but they do a great job on the production design. Overall, it's a decent sequel that feels more like an epilogue. 3/5
A movie that asks what if you combine Halloween, The Terminator, and Assault on Precinct 13 but it's about a killer robot dressed as Santa.
Joe Begos is back after one of my favorite movies of that year, VFW, to make a killer robot movie that's surrounded by Christmas neon lighting and gore. The movie still captures the 70s grindhouse quality that VFW has and it has one of the best synth scores of the year. Riley Dandy and Sam Delich play annoying hipsters who work at a vinyl shop and talk about alt rock and horror movies all day. It's got all the ingredients that make you root for RoboSanta and the movie plays out exactly the way you think it does. For the small indie budget, the kills and the action set pieces are pretty great and on brand for the style. While I think VFW does a much better job overall at the plot and the action, Christmas Bloody Christmas is just straightforward dumb fun. Overall, had more fun with this than I did with Violent Night which makes it look like child's play in comparison. 3/5
Ol Parker pretty much used the Netflix algorithm and sadly made the ultimate boring airplane movie.
It's exactly as advertised, it's a romcom about a rich white family going on a vacation in Bali to find themselves and fix their broken marriage. This is pretty much a throwback film to the 90s/2000s when these kinds of movies would get made so often and it doesn't help that they got George Clooney & Julia Roberts in this playing the same kind of characters. And it's also funny that they got Kaitlyn Dever & Billie Lourd almost playing the same characters from Booksmart. I will say the only part that was remotely interesting was Maxime Bouttier and the other Indonesian actors even though they don't give them much to do. Overall, while it's not offensively awful, it's as bland as you can get in 2022. 1.5/5
A pretty chill coming of age story that doesn't have a lot to say but it's a good lazy watch. It takes some obvious inspiration from Stand By Me and other similar movies like George Washington, but centers on a group of girls instead. The director James Ponsoldt definitely intentionally made it more about the vibes of hanging out in the summer rather than being plot driven about the pains of growing up. The acting from the girls isn't super great but it didn't bother me that much. I thought Lia Barnett had the most going in terms of character development and it centers around her the most. Overall, it's just okay but it's a far cry from his classics. 2.5/5
When in doubt, always play TV On The Radio and Living Colour.
Henry Selick returns after 13 years to give us another beautiful showcase of stop-motion animation. That being said, it's probably the messiest and overstuffed script that he has to deal with. It's got some great world building but I feel like it kept wandering around too often to make things coherent and focused. Key & Peele reunite to play as Wendell & Wild and while I thought they had some moments that really work, I thought they could have used them better in regard to the plot. The movie centers on Lyric Ross who plays Kat and I feel like when we are trying to get to know her the movie really works. Overall, I love what it's trying to be about, but if they had made the plot simpler and more coherent, it would have been another instant classic. 3/5
This was a phenomenal character-driven indie drama that deals with trauma and anxiety. It's also the proper comeback movie for Jennifer Lawrence who hasn't made a movie like this in a long time. The director does a great job using the location of New Orleans to great effect by having a lot of the scenes shot outdoors in the city. Unsurprisingly, Brian Tyree Henry was also phenomenal in this and I wish they gave him more scenes with Jennifer Lawrence. Overall, loved it, it's exactly the kind of movie that you hope gets made every year. 4/5
You just know some film bros will be mad at what movies were showcased at the very end.
This was a giant and noisy semi-historical drama about the rise and fall of pre-code Hollywood when silent films transitioned to the talkies. It very much takes that same chaotic energy from The Wolf of Wall Street and applies it to old Hollywood. The movie starts out with a big drug-fueled party that lasts for at least 30 minutes before the title card shows up and the movie really starts from there. I thought Damien Chazelle successfully emulated other filmmakers like Martin Scorsese, Quentin Tarantino, and Paul Thomas Anderson with the way it's beautifully shot and delivered. It's almost like the anti-La La Land with the message of the film.
While Brad Pitt was decent in this, I thought Margot Robbie steals the movie from the very beginning. The section of the movie where they attempt to make their first talkies with Margot Robbie was easily the best scene in the movie that you can't wait to watch again and again. There's also a section where Tobey Maguire basically plays the Joker and where that goes is so wild. Diego Calva plays one of the main leads and I thought his stuff was great in an understated way, especially toward the end. Also, I thought Li Jun Li was great here and got a couple of moments where she shined. And there's also Jovan Adepo and Jean Smart who were great as well where it explores the Jazz influence on cinema as well as the gossip side of things. Overall, it's one of those movies where you're either gonna love it or hate it and fortunately, I loved it. 4.5/5
ngl, I felt that when he ate the double-stack pizza.
This was an incredible and raw character study that centers on an extremely obese English professor who's trying to reconnect with his daughter and deal with his own morality. It's got shades of Darren Aronofsky's other films like The Wrestler and Requiem for a Dream, but in a more stagey environment where it's mainly shot in an apartment building. Brendan Fraser was excellent as expected and it's without question one of the best roles he's done especially considering what he has to do on a technical level. The make-up and prosthetics that were used are incredibly realistic. It's not really a spoiler, but Moby Dick plays a major part in the story and it's intentionally not so subtle with the overall theme of the movie along with the theme of despair and gluttony. Surprisingly, I thought Sadie Sink and Hong Chau were just as good as Brendan Fraser and what they were able to do was great. Much like other Aronofsky films, this will no doubt be angrily criticized to death for all sorts of reasons and I don't really care. Overall, The Whale is a great display of what tough love looks like. 4.5/5
The irony of a movie about a wooden boy coming to life being so lifeless.
This is quite possibly the weakest entry in Disney's live action remakes of their classic animated films aka cash grabbin season. Not only they made it longer than the original, but it's also filled with some of the oddest moments that don't really make any sense. It doesn't help that the stuff you can get away with in animation, you can not get away with in live action like Honest John. It's a movie that is way too cold and calculated to do or say anything interesting. While I thought some of the CG looked interesting, you clearly see they ran out of the animation budget when the movie gets to the final act. Between Elvis and this, Tom Hanks is so adamant to be in a role where he's completely unhinged while doing a bad accent. The only positive I have with the cast was Benjamin Evan Ainsworth who voices Pinocchio and Joseph Gordon-Levitt voicing Jiminy Cricket. Overall, it's one of those Disney movies where they don't know what to do with and it shows. 1.5/5
Unlike Disney's remake of Pinocchio, this was such a breath of fresh air by comparison. It not only reinvents the story by making it more about grief set around WWI's fascist Italy, they smartly use stop motion animation which adds to the overall theme of the story. It very much has all the del Toro touches that will remind you of The Devil's Backbone, Pan's Labyrinth, and even Hellboy II. The themes of religion play a big part in this version of Pinocchio and what they do with that was pretty interesting. David Bradley as Geppetto was great and they really make you feel for him when you see him spend time with his son before Pinocchio shows up. There are some really nice character designs, especially the "Blue Fairy" which actually looks like the Biblical depiction of an angel. With the stop-motion nature of it all, Guillermo del Toro's Pinocchio reminds me more Kubo and the Two Strings than anything which I dug. Overall, incredible stuff. It's the perfect example of how you do dark fairy tales for the new generation. 4/5
This is basically Alejandro Iñárritu's Roma meets Tree of Life where it's his self-conscious semi-autobiography on his rise to stardom done in a very avant-garde style. It's one of those movies that will probably not work for everyone because of how nonsensical or ambitious or even pretentious it may seem on the surface. I thought the political and social discourse was interesting in a way that felt therapeutic for Iñárritu to get it all out of his system. This has some of the best direction and cinematography all year with some of the wild production designs that I'm surprised he got away with. I thought Daniel Giménez Cacho who basically plays Iñárritu was incredible considering how much he's on screen and I thought Griselda Siciliani and Ximena Lamadrid were great as well. Overall, while I totally get some groups will hate this for surface-level reasons, this was a phenomenal and bizarre journey that kept me fascinated from start to finish. 4/5
Yeah, this was really bad. It's a movie with a flimsy premise that they borrowed from 13 Going on 30 and it's nothing more than a Diane Keaton vehicle to just play herself for 90 minutes. I will say the movie had some small promises when it started with Elizabeth Lail but that quickly evaporates. Easily the most egregious part about this movie is having Taylour Paige, Simon Rex, and Patti Harrison do some wasted inoffensive shlock after they were in some of the best indie movies of 2021. There's a part in the middle where it's nothing but a flagrant commercial for California Pizza Kitchen and Instagram. The comedy is tailor-made for people who think salt is too spicy and the romance in this is something out of a bad sitcom. There's also department store pop music playing almost every 15 minutes. It's also got mixed messaging on whether or not that wanting to feel old is bad. Overall, without a doubt one of the worst movies of the year. Taylour Paige deserves better. 1/5
It's yet another standard music biopic but this time it goes into the life of Whitney Houston. It's got all the cliches that you've seen in numerous other biopics and none of them are remotely interesting. Apparently, it's by the same writer as Bohemian Rhapsody and The Theory of Everything and it shows. It collectively shows her rise to fame, her greatest hits, and her downfall in a very high school project powerpoint kind of way. It almost felt like it was made for tv and not a movie theater. I will say I thought Naomi Ackie as Whitney Houston was pretty impressive and I thought Stanley Tucci was great in a subtle way who plays her record producer. Overall, it's formulaic as bad place despite a couple of good performances. 2/5
This was a phenomenal movie about the lynching of Emmett Till that's shown through the eyes of her mother. With the way it started, I was kinda worried that the filmmaking was not up to par with the heaviness of the story they want to make, but that worry quickly went away when you see how each scene took its time to develop. The director Chinonye Chukwu does a great job slowly building up the tension and the stakes as it goes along. The movie mostly lands on Danielle Deadwyler's performance who plays Emmett Till's mother and I thought she was incredible in it. The way they manage what to show and what not to show was interesting and I thought the impact of that was well executed. There was definitely care put into this where it wants to be as authentic as possible without it being too sappy or depressing. Overall, it's incredibly well made with a great performance by Danielle Deadwyler. 4/5
If you take a shot everytime they annoyingly mention Star Wars, you'd be dead.
This is essentially the conclusion (or maybe not) to the Clerks trilogy where, much like Jackass Forever, they look at their own mortality and come to terms with being old and looking back at the thing that made the franchise what it is. Where I thought Clerks II was pretty good for their humor, Clerks III does a pretty good job at delivering some emotional heft that I don't think Kevin Smith was capable of (or hasn't in a very long time). Brian O'Halloran was easily the best part of this movie. As for everything else? pretty cringy to say the least. It's still got Kevin Smith's stilted nerdiness and his brand of humor that doesn't always work and stops the movie from moving along. I will say I thought the cameo-palooza where everyone was auditioning was not bad. Overall, the good and the bad just kinda counterbalance each other. It's not bad but not great. 2.5/5
This is what happens you think you're trying to be like Paddington and you end up somewhere near The Bee Movie and the live action Clifford the Big Red Dog movie.
This wasn't necessarily a bad movie but it's very much a turn-off-your-brain kids entertainment that doesn't do anything new or challenging. It's partially a musical that uses Shawn Mendes's voice for an anthropomorphic singing crocodile who's trying to overcome stage fright. It's a lot of typical hijinks and crazy moments that you'd see on Looney Tunes but in live action. I will say the CG was impressive considering how much he has to work with the main characters. I thought Constance Wu was fine in this but Javier Bardem kinda steals the show as the eccentric magician. Overall, just kinda passable. There's not much going on besides the musical numbers and the comedy bits. 2/5
This was a great quiet and soothing romantic drama that is about living life as a widower at a later stage in life. It's a very understated movie with performances by two veteran character actors Dale Dickey & Wes Studi who are phenomenal in this. It's got shades of Chloe Zhao's Nomadland with Robin Wright's Land and it's got sprinkles of Wes Anderson with some of the side characters. Max Walker-Silverman does a great job directing this where the camera does linger on certain shots for just the right amount of time and it heightens the introspective-ness of the movie. Overall, for a slice-of-life indie drama, it's really well done. 4/5
When the "Oh this f**kin' guy" dude from Uncut Gems showed up in this, I knew this movie was for me.
This was such a wild and bizarre film that you can tell it was produced by the Safdie Brothers the moment the movie started. It's essentially a coming-of-age film about a high school kid who's living in Jersey and hopes to become a cartoonist one day. They do such a good job making the film look cold, grimy, and sweaty that just makes you wanna take a hot shower after it's done. And much like a Safdie Brothers movie, it's got a ton of side characters who are authentically real and not pretty from the east coast. There are also some Noah Baumbach influences in the way the story is structured with some of the dialogue, especially from the parents. Daniel Zolghadri, Matthew Maher, and Miles Emanuel were so good in this and that final act was so chaotically delicious. Overall, while not perfect, it's a movie that scratches that Good Times/Uncut Gems itch, and for that this makes it one of my favorite movies of the year. 4.5/5
Incredible stuff. This was Park Chan-wook trying to channel his inner Alfred Hitchcock and Paul Verhoeven (particularly Vertigo and Basic Instinct) in this romantic crime drama. It's definitely got some of the most interesting direction, editing, and camera work all year where it's so stylish and fits the tone of a raunchy detective novel from the 50s come to life. Park Hae Il was pretty good but Tang Wei pretty steals the movie from the moment she shows up. I did appreciate how much of a role smartphones and smart technology play in the investigation, it just makes the film stand out a little more. Overall, while I don't think it's my favorite Park Chan-wook film, it's definitely up there. 4/5
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