Badass One Liners

[Kent]

The trailer of MS One Security Maximum has a great one.

"Who was the mystery man on the phone?"

"His name was F**k you, he was Asian."

"What happened in that hotel room?"

"Uh... it was coupon night and I was trampolining your wife."

 

[jacobed]

Long Live the King

-Scar

 

[Kane52630]

I'm gonna take you to the bank, Senator Trent...to the blood bank. - Steven Seagal

 

[Mrs. Sawyer]

Remember when I said I'd kill you last. I lied.

- Arnold Schwarzenegger

 

[LOBO3315a]

Pretty much anything Wednesday Addams said in both movies.

Wednesday: Pugsley, sit in the chair.
Pugsley: Why?
Wednesday: So we can play a game.
Pugsley: What game?
Wednesday: [strapping him in] It's called, "Is There a God?"

Girl Scout: Is this made from real lemons?
Wednesday: Yes.
Girl Scout: I only like all-natural foods and beverages, organically grown, with no preservatives. Are you sure they're real lemons?
Pugsley: Yes.
Girl Scout: Well, I'll tell you what. I'll buy a cup if you buy a box of my delicious Girl Scout cookies. Do we have a deal?
Wednesday: Are they made from real Girl Scouts?

Amanda: Is that your bathing suit?
Wednesday: Is that your overbite?

Gary: Now, one of you will be the drowning victim and the other one gets to be our lifesaver.
Amanda: I'll be the victim!
Wednesday: All your life.

Wednesday: I don't want to be in the pageant.
Gary: Don't you want to help me realize my vision?
Wednesday: Your work is puerile and under-dramatized. You lack any sense of structure, character and the Aristotelian unities.
Gary: Young lady, I am getting just a tad tired of your attitude problem

Amanda: Hi, I'm Amanda Buckman. Why are you dressed like that?
Wednesday: Like what?
Amanda: Like you're going to a funeral. Why are you dressed like somebody died?
Wednesday: Wait.

Gomez: Children, why do you hate the baby?
Pugsley: We don't hate him. We just wanna play with him.
Wednesday: Especially his head.

Morticia: Wednesday's at that very special age when a girl has only one thing on her mind.
Ellen: Boys?
Wednesday: Homicide.

 

[henry_9305]

"I have an army."

"We have a Hulk."

 

[Thundarr]

There were some good ones in The Princess Bride.

Inigo: Hello down there! Slow going?
Roberts: Look, I don't mean to be rude, but this isn't as easy as it looks so I would appreciate it if you wouldn't distract me.
Inigo: Sorry! I don't suppose you could speed things up?
Roberts: Look if you're in such a rush you could lower a rope or a tree branch or find something useful to do.
Inigo: I could do that. I have some rope up here. But I do not think that you will accept my help, as I am only waiting around to kill you!
Roberts: That does put a damper on our relationship.
Inigo: But I promise I won't kill you until after you've reached the top.
Roberts: That's very reassuring, but I'm afraid you'll just have to wait.
Inigo: I hate waiting. Can I give you my word as a Spaniard?
Roberts: No good! I've known too many Spaniards!

Vezzini: He didn't fall? Inconceivable!
Inigo: You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Vezzini: Give her to me! Catch up to us when he's dead!
Fezzik: What do I do?
Vezzini: Finish him! YOUR way!
Fezzik: Oh good! My way! Thank you Vezzini. Which whay's my way?
Vezzini: Pick up one of those rocks. Get behind the boulder. In a few minutes the man in black will be coming around the bend. The moment his HEAD is in sight, HIT IT WITH THE ROCK!
Fezzik: My way's not very sportsmanlike.

Fezzik: I did that on purpose. I don't often miss.
Roberts: I believe you. So what now?
Fezzik: Now we face each other as God intended, sportsmanlike. No weapons. No tricks. Just skill against skill alone.
Roberts: You mean I put down my sword, you put down your rock, and we try and kill each other like civilized people.
Fezzik: Or I could kill you now.
Roberts: I think the odds are slightly in your favor when it comes to hand fighting.
Fezzik: It's not my fault for being the biggest and the strongest. I don't even exercize.

Roberts: Are you just fiddling around with me or what?
Fezzik: I just want you to feel you're doing well. I hate for small people to die embarassed.

Inigo: Are you the Miracle Max who worked for the king all those years?
Max: The king's stinkin" son fired me! And thank you so much for bringing up such a painful subject. Next time why don't you just give me a nice paper cut and pour lemon juice on it? We're closed!
(Closes the window & Inigo keeps knocking)
Beat it or I'll call the brute squad!
Fezzik: I'm on the brute squad.
Max: You ARE the brute squad.

Inigo: He's dead, he can't talk.
Max: Oh-ho, look who knows so much. Well it just so happens that your friend here is just mostly dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. All dead, well with all dead there's pretty much just one thing you can do.
Inigo: What's that?
Max: Go through his pockets and look for loose change.

Humperdinck: To the death!
Wesley: No! To the pain!
Humperdinck: I don't believe I'm familiar with that expression.
Wesley: I'll explain. And I'll use small words so you'll be sure to understand, you worthog faced buffoon.
Humperdinck: I do believe that is the first time anyone has ever dared to insult me.
Wesley: It won't be the last.

 

[Thundarr]

"What this country needs is some serious gun control. We should get rid of all the guns! Just get rid of 'em . . . But not my gun."

-Killer Bean Forever

 

[Darkness Falls]

From Harold and kumar go to white castle

Both: Where are you going
Neil patrick harris: *turns head* where ever god takes me
*puts sunglasses down and walks off like a boss*

 

[Donut]

Catch you ****ers at a bad time ?

 

[Clu]

my two favorite are from predator

Stick around(after arnold throws a knife and it sticks a guy to a pole)

Knock Knock (after arnold kicks down a door then blasts a guy with a 40mm grenade round to the chest)

 

[Breogan]

Zorro (twin blades) carves "Z" into guy's chest, - "So the Devil will know who sent you." - before kicking him out of moving train.

 

[Kane52630]

"Yes they deserve to die, and I hope they burn in Hell!" - Samuel L. Jackson

 

[hopefuldreamer]

Loved this one in 'Unknown'

'I didn't forget everything. I remember how to kill you, *******!'

 

[Kane52630]

"Puny God" - Hulk in Avengers

 

[Rowsdower!]

"Boom." - Rihanna in Battleship










Just kidding.

 

[A Necessary Evil]

"Wanna know my secret? I'm always angry."

 

[ThePowerCosmic]

"There's only one God, ma'am... and I'm pretty sure he doesn't dress like that."

 

[Darkness Falls]

"do i look to be in a gaming mood" - Thor (to loki)

 

[Dave McFly]

my two favorite are from predator

Stick around(after arnold throws a knife and it sticks a guy to a pole)

Knock Knock (after arnold kicks down a door then blasts a guy with a 40mm grenade round to the chest)

I always thought a GREAT one liner from him would be "avon calling" after kicking in a door .

 

[Darkness Falls]

*from the last action hero*
[points to guard dogs]
Benedict: Make no mistake, they are exceptionally well-trained.
[snaps fingers, dogs form pyramid]
Benedict: I snap my fingers again and some time tomorrow, you emerge from several canine rector. Or you and Toto can return to the land of Oz. Questions?
Jack Slater: Yeah, two of them. Why am I wasting my time with silly putz like you when I could be doing something more dangerous - like rearranging my sock drawer? Two, how exactly are you going to snap your fingers, after I rip off both of your thumbs?

 

[Gianakin_]

"I now pronounce you man and knife" - Expendables 2. That's what the concept of one-liners is all about.

 

[Secret Fawful]

Captain America: "Mr. Stark! We need a plan of attack!"
Stark: "I have a plan. Attack."

Avengers.

 

[Hotwire]

Catch you ****ers at a bad time ?

Along with it's buddy...


"Some mother f***ers are always trying to ice skate uphill."

 

[Gianakin_]

Along with it's buddy...


"Some mother f***ers are always trying to ice skate uphill."

F**k yeah!