A physician claimed the following are actual comments made by patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonscopy.
1) "Take it easy, Doc! You're boldly going where no man has gone before!"
2) "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"
3) "Can you hear me now?"
4) "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"
5) "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married."
6) "Any sign of the trapped miners yet?"
7) "You put you left hand in, you take your left hand out."
8) "Hey, now I know how a muppet feels!"
9) "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!"
10) "Hey, Doc, let me know if you find my dignity!"
11) "You must be an executive at enron?"
....and the best one is......
12) "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up here?"
1) "Take it easy, Doc! You're boldly going where no man has gone before!"
2) "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"
3) "Can you hear me now?"
4) "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"
5) "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married."
6) "Any sign of the trapped miners yet?"
7) "You put you left hand in, you take your left hand out."
8) "Hey, now I know how a muppet feels!"
9) "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!"
10) "Hey, Doc, let me know if you find my dignity!"
11) "You must be an executive at enron?"
....and the best one is......
12) "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up here?"