Corrupt A Wish - Part 2

[Spidermatrix53]

Granted, you have had a massive pulmonary and died so, for you, the movie is over.



I wish I was unstoppable.

 

[Anubis]

Granted, but now you're over 2000 pounds and therefore unmovable.



I wish I was fire proof.

 

[greenrage36]

Granted. You're also in an abestos-laden coffin and six feet under, but by golly that wish is done and granted!


I wish my cell battery hadn't died during mid-call a little while ago

 

[Spidermatrix53]

Granted, the call now has continued and ended in a relationship-destroying fight.



I wish I had a good nap right now.

 

[Ultra Lantern]

Granted,but the loud noises outside keep you awake.

I wish for world domination.

 

[Spidermatrix53]

Granted, and you are violently dethroned in an uprising.



I wish I knew who the girl is in Ultra Lantern's avi is. (Carrie Underwood?)

 

[Ultra Lantern]

Granted,it's true,but,you're arrested for being a stalker.

I wish I could sing like a pro.

 

[Spidermatrix53]

Granted, you now sing like Tom Waits.



I wish I never had acid reflux again.

 

[Anubis]

Granted....you now suffer from incontinence instead.


I wish I could pull off an amazing heist.

 

[Sensi]

You do but it went viral on you tube and you were soon arrested.

I wish guys could never play a multiplayer video game.

 

[Anubis]

Granted. Now there are no more MMO's.

I wish I had the money to buy the new Batman and Uncharted games.

 

[Sensi]

You do but you just sit and stare at it never ever moving toward buying those games.

I wish i could be as cruel as other people I know.

 

[Spidermatrix53]

Granted, everyone hates you.


I wish I could teleport.

 

[Anubis]

Granted, you get stuck in a wall.

I wish the new season of Venture Brothers would start.

 

[Spidermatrix53]

Granted, but... Oh God, I can't Imagine a world where it sucks...

Granted, but it's only two episodes long and is cancelled.


I wish I had enough power to take over a small country.

 

[Duke]

Granted, but it doesn't live up to your expectations, therefore boring result.



I wish I had Supe's superpowers.

 

[Anubis]

Granted, but... Oh God, I can't Imagine a world where it sucks...

Granted, but it's only two episodes long and is cancelled.


I wish I had enough power to take over a small country.

Granted, you're playing Risk.

Granted, but it doesn't live up to your expectations, therefore boring result.



I wish I had Supe's superpowers.

But you lack his control and accidentally destroy the planet by sneezing.




I wish I had a power ring.

 

[Duke]

Granted, it's a trinket from a "gumball" machine



I wish Michael Bay never touched Transformers & messed them up.

 

[Spidermatrix53]

Granted, Uwe Boll got to them first.


I wish I had perfect etiquette.

 

[Anubis]

Granted, nobody likes you Mr. Perfect.


I wish hump day meant something else.

 

[Sensi]

It does. it means all camels have a holiday.

I wish men who think women should bow to them would have their bits cut off

 

[Anubis]

Granted, but all the men who had their bits cut off go nuts and kill all the dudes that didn't. so now there's no more men.

I wish I had some get up and go.

 

[Sensi]

You do but it actually is just another energy drink that doesn't work

I wish never to cry again

 

[Anubis]

Granted, you're incapable of feeling emotions from now on.


I wish I didn't miss the first 7 minutes of how I met your mother.

 

[Spidermatrix53]

Granted, you didn't laugh even once and was horribly disappointed.


I wish 7th Heaven was still on the air.