Corrupt A Wish - Part 2

[Rozen Thorne]

Aye they do get rather confused, they all get on the same page, problem is that page is American english which is the most confusing language of them all.

I wish I had a bigger, stronger bed, I have taken mine for granted.

 

[MissMarvelous]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH really? You must have rocked it hard.

I wish Netflix would upload way more content. I already finished two tv shows today... Now what???

 

[Rozen Thorne]

Sadly in this day and age one streaming service just won't cut it, now you have a ton of content spread out over dozens of streaming services, it's bloody frustrating to find anything worth watching.

I wish I had the attention span and focus enough to read more than a few pages of a book, takes a month to finish one now when I was a lad I could devour one in days, does my head in.

 

[MissMarvelous]

Your attention and focus are optimized now but that's the only thing you can do, just reading. And you read. And read. And keep reading. For ever. and ever...

I wish I could get my hands on the secret formula to get rid of stretch marks and cellush*t.

 

[Rozen Thorne]

You discover a unknown formula that fixes all skin problems, now every beauty product manufacturer is after you with an army of lawyers and if that doesn't work they have some hard pipe-hitting thuggas, run.

I wish I had a castle built into the Highlands of Scotland, equipped with a mountain of MREs and a private well, with loyal servants and a decent armory.

 

[MissMarvelous]

Granted, but for some reason you keep hearing these sounds outside:



I wish I could tell people to feck off with their pessimistic attitude.

 

[Rozen Thorne]

Everyone now has super positive attitudes but you notice there's a lot less people around.

I wish I was better at making cabinets and general woodworking.

 

[MissMarvelous]

Granted, You're now "Joseph" (Joseph was a carpenter who lived in the town of Nazareth in the Roman province of Galilee. You may know the story.).

I wish we can keep this cool breeze forever! The temperature is darn exquisite and there's this cool awesome breeze.

 

[Rozen Thorne]

Granted, You're now "Joseph"

Oh this won't end well.

Granted now the entire world is one temperature, places that need high temps are going to be ecologically damaged, places that require cold temps are going to warm up and ice all over the world melts, oceans rise, cataclysm.

I wish my parents were more careful when they're outside doing stuff, this is the 3rd time my dad has tripped in the garden and messed up his arm, 13 stitches... good grief!

 

[MissMarvelous]

13 stitches

Dang it, that sounds nasty.

Granted, just granted.

I wish for an awesome spot (some rooftop) to admire a huge storm.

 

[Rozen Thorne]

You're on the highest rooftop in an intense storm, the best view possible, and closest to the storm... wave and smile on your way to the ground when you get blown over the side.

I wish I could finish the game room before Christmas, looks like I have some rot in the walls and replacing that is going to be a bugger.

 

[LoganPool]

Granted, but now the rest of the house deteriorates so bad, the home is unlivable.

I wish I could snap my fingers and have my "dad bod" disappear.

 

[Rozen Thorne]

You Thanos Snap™ and your "Dad Bod" fades into ashes. #sad

I wish for Halloween there was a gigantic Monsters of Rock concert just for me and my family & friends.

 

[MissMarvelous]

Granted, but it's oh-so-gigantic that you have to walk for miles and miles until you reach the stage.

I wish I could have one of these machines, those could be fake coins for all I care! But it's so addictive!

 

[Rozen Thorne]

Is that a pachinko machine? I haven't seen one of those in a million years. Granted.

I wish I could be in Japan now instead of when I was a kid so I could properly enjoy the experience.

 

[MissMarvelous]

Granted, now everyone is staring is staring at you: blondish, round eyes, white dude. I mean, you know they love your profile. Ya like that, right? People's attention.

I wish I could stop sitting in such an awkward position.

 

[Rozen Thorne]

Now you sit perfectly ergonomic designed to support your back, it doesn't allow for perfect comfort.

I wish it wouldn't snow so early in the Fall, makes me super sleepy.

 

[MissMarvelous]

Granted, now it snows later in the Fall. It's gonna fall, eventually.

I wish I had discovered vegan Camembert before!

 

[Rozen Thorne]

You become aware of it as soon as cheese enters your diet, now no cheese can stand up to it.

I wish I could make world class desserts.

 

[MissMarvelous]

Granted, now I want some.

I wish I were a little bit more like the lady that exercises EVERY DAY on her rooftop (yes, I'm watching you, neighbor!)

 

[Rozen Thorne]

Granted, hope you don't have a pointy roof.

I wish my uncle a speedy recovery from Covid and an eventual spleen removal operation.

 

[MissMarvelous]

GRANTED.

I wish this sh*t goes away and never returns.

 

[Rozen Thorne]

It's like the mythical Hydra, this one goes away and 3 more fill the empty void it leaves, nature really really wants humanity gone.

I wish that so many people I know of that are getting seriously ill (and their pets too for crying out loud) stop and get well miraculously.

 

[MissMarvelous]

Granted! Now people want to get to know you so that they can get well too. Suddenly, you're becoming quite popular.

I wish my back would stop hurting so bad! This is the 3rd week in a row.

 

[Rozen Thorne]

The next person you bump into is a chiropractor, they fix your back for free, it goes out the next day. (based on a true story)

I wish I could make up my mind on a colour scheme for this room, drawing an absolute blank.