I've suffered from depression since my heart surgery in 2004. Sometimes I get bad bouts. I started getting a bad bout during the week and now my Lexapro dosage has gone up followed by a few days of Xanax. I'm moving in September with my gf and I fear I won't be better and then comes guilt and a lot of other horrible feelings. Yesterday I thought about suicide and it made me feel happy(I would never do it because I wouldn't put that pain on anyone). Do you suffer from depression, how did you feel through it and did your gf/bf/wife/husband help?