Does your city have the best bums?

[SalaciousVC]

Here In L.A,The bums **** on the sidewalk

 

[Crook]

We've got you beat, a bum took a crap in our subway car and successfully cleared everyone out at the next stop.

 

[PyroChamber]

I'm waiting to see a bum kick someone's ass that's messing with him

 

[terry78]

I remember I was tossing out some old dunkin' donuts downstairs from one of our meetings and one of them ran up to me and was like, "don't throw that good **** away, young man!" and promptly snatched the box away and started eating them. I was like, "you know people been taking bites off those things and putting them back in the box(we got a lot of immature asses at our office), but of course, he was down with that.

 

[PyroChamber]

Hahaha, one tried to trick me into giving him some money. I was walking and this guy was handing out flyers so I figured "what the hell" and took one; as soon as I grab the flyer he goes "SPARE A DONATION FOR THE HOMELESS TODAY?!" I just threw it back at him and said "no thanks". I walked off and he was still begging.

 

[Immortalfire]

This one has a sign that says I have a small penis please help.

 

[lemmasaurus]

Eating Chinese with a friend downtown, I witnessed an obese homeless woman who was obsessing over this couple's little girl... she kept going on and on about how the girl's hat looked like a little crown or something. She was very obviously off her rocker. Later she began singing incoherently to "Hit Me with your Best Shot." We left.

 

[bullets]

there are some bums in boston making more money than i do

 

[hammy]

^I haven't seen that one, but the ones that get me are the ones that are just laying there in front of a store. You don't know if they're sleeping or dead.

I remember seeing one guy a week ago walk in the middle of the street and laid down. Then a minute later he got back up and started walking.

Also, there's this overweight white girl who walks around begging for change that I see occasionally. I'm thinking she must be new.

That's so sad. These people are so lost and at that point, need intervention. How do you even begin to find work when you're not even clean.

That last line was funny though .. she must be new.

 

[fu manchu]

i also heard that a city inspector was looking at the trash of one property and realize that a bum was using it to sleeping in it.

 

[Superman4ever]

We've got you beat, a bum took a crap in our subway car and successfully cleared everyone out at the next stop.

That's a Saturday morning here!

We had a bum drop trow, whack it in the middle of the University bookstore, 2 days ago...I had to shield my little sister's eyes...it was a Redbook or Goodhouse Keeping.

I had a bum come to the hospital, in the ER, beg for money for a cab home and then shaat herself while some young lady was handing her some change. She does this alot, we nicked-named her Goldy Showers Marie, cause she usually just pisses herself and then calls an ambulance to take her to the hospital to clean her up! Anyway back to this fateful day. She did this in the middle of a packed ER waiting room on a Monday evening (our busiest day of the week). Needless to say it was a wet kinda dump that sent kids with broken ankles running out the door to throw up. Then the psycho began running around the hospital screaming her head off "I NEED a TAXI, I NEED A TAXI," leaving a trail of her end trails for housekeeping to clean.

This went on for 15-20 minutes cause our security didn't want to touch her...Detroit police, when they finally arrived, didn't want to touch her...so we had to assign 4 techs and 3 nurses suited up in hazmat gear (or close to it), while I persuaded her to go into the bathroom and then they forced her to shower.

It pretty much went like this:
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We had housekeeping from 4 floors comedown to sanitize the ER. 2 house keepers to a floor = 8 + the 5 that work in the ER = 13 housekeepers!

She died 4 months later when she was hit by a car while panhandling in the middle of traffic.

 

[PyroChamber]

No offense to them, but if a bum came to my job and took a **** in the middle of an aisle I'm sorry but he'd get the beating of his life.

I don't care if you are homeless and not right in the head, you just don't do that. And second, chances are I'd have to be the one to clean it up.

 

[thedeadite]

Superman4ever why am I not surprised you said Detroit.

Here in Windsor most of our bums are really out there, but most don't ask you for money. I'm pretty confident the majority are psych patients that have been released due to lack of beds (which is another problem all together). Kinda strange, they'll just ramble on talking crazy to you for hours if you let them.

 

[Knightsaber Priss]

Haha, I'm not even trying to be that funny or insensitive regarding it, but they were actually discussing this at the office(so you can see the ilk I apparently spend time with) and talking about the random homeless around the Chicago Loop, and how each has their own reputation for doing something outlandish. I know one guy that's always on the bridge crossing the river that sits there every day, and everytime I see him he's singing the Mary Tyler Moore theme song....I am not making this up. Chicago has the best bums, hands down.

Pfft! That's nothing compared to the guy who got caught by local police doing nasty, sexual things with a dog in a dumpster. That certainly made front page news in our local paper.

 

[jaguarr]

That's a Saturday morning here!

We had a bum drop trow, whack it in the middle of the University bookstore, 2 days ago...I had to shield my little sister's eyes...it was a Redbook or Goodhouse Keeping.

I had a bum come to the hospital, in the ER, beg for money for a cab home and then shaat herself while some young lady was handing her some change. She does this alot, we nicked-named her Goldy Showers Marie, cause she usually just pisses herself and then calls an ambulance to take her to the hospital to clean her up! Anyway back to this fateful day. She did this in the middle of a packed ER waiting room on a Monday evening (our busiest day of the week). Needless to say it was a wet kinda dump that sent kids with broken ankles running out the door to throw up. Then the psycho began running around the hospital screaming her head off "I NEED a TAXI, I NEED A TAXI," leaving a trail of her end trails for housekeeping to clean.

This went on for 15-20 minutes cause our security didn't want to touch her...Detroit police, when they finally arrived, didn't want to touch her...so we had to assign 4 techs and 3 nurses suited up in hazmat gear (or close to it), while I persuaded her to go into the bathroom and then they forced her to shower.

It pretty much went like this:

We had housekeeping from 4 floors comedown to sanitize the ER. 2 house keepers to a floor = 8 + the 5 that work in the ER = 13 housekeepers!

She died 4 months later when she was hit by a car while panhandling in the middle of traffic.

LOL! Supes wins this thread. The bums here mostly stay down by the water or bother people outside the bars, but that's about it. When I travel to the Bay Area, though, I'm simply amazed at the number of bums around downtown San Francisco. What a crappy place to be a bum as cold and rainy as it gets there throughout so much of the year.

jag

 

[Untilteld]

Here in Windsor most of our bums are really out there, but most don't ask you for money. I'm pretty confident the majority are psych patients that have been released due to lack of beds (which is another problem all together). Kinda strange, they'll just ramble on talking crazy to you for hours if you let them.

Yeah I live in Windsor too, and our bums don't ask for money much.

 

[Nathan Petrelli]

One bum here walks around with a coke cup from Mcdonalds, he doesnt blink, he just walks drinking out of it. I have seen him steal peoples Mcdonalds cokes right out of their hands.

I always give money to homeless people unless I can tell they are meth addicts.

 

[Ash J. Williams]

San Jose -- including the downtown area -- has some pretty strange bums here and there, but I think the bums in Santa Cruz are pretty diverse in terms of character.

 

[JayCaz]

I'm waiting to see a bum kick someone's ass that's messing with him

I've saw that a few times in Liverpool. You get these 18 year old idiots teasing the tramps thinking it's funny, not realising that most of our tramps are impervious to pain & brave as f**k, due to being full of crack & such.

I've seen a few young lads take a good ole smack off a tramp, felt quite satisfying to see.

 

[Banquet]

Apparently this tiny college town called Ellensburg has some interesting bums. There is an ex-Boeing engineer who will prattle off about mechanics no one can understand. He had some kind of head injury and now just wanders aimlessly through the town.

Seattle has generous bums from my experience. Once one of them came up to a couple friends and me asking for change, and after we gave him a few bucks he gave us cigarettes and compliments. Another one rapped for two minutes about how "mother****** awesome" we were after giving him some change. So if you're in Seattle, check out Carl the rapping bum. He strokes egos for cash.

 

[Anubis Raptor]

Around where I live the bums run in packs....

 

[BAMFaly]

Aberdeen bums are generally just freeloaders void of any personality or banter other than "spare change?... Have a good night anyway." Like it's going to make you think, "Oh what a polite hobo. Maybe I will give him my hard-earned cash after all."

We do have one called MC Santa. Big guy, huge white beard, talks to himself at 100mph so it sounds like he's freestyling. Probably about crack.

 

[Cobblepot]

All I see is a cute panda with some far too skinny fleshy thing behind it.

Oh man that is a panda!!

 

[DDS]

Here In L.A,The bums **** on the sidewalk

We've got you beat, a bum took a crap in our subway car and successfully cleared everyone out at the next stop.

There was this one time when a friend of my dad's was downtown, and he found a pie-tin full of bum crap.

And then this OTHER time, a bum tried to attack him (keep in mind, he's been in the military for years ) and he knocked him to the ground. The bum then proceeded to pee himself.

 

[The Guard]

All I see is a cute panda with some far too skinny fleshy thing behind it.

Damn straight. Eat a burger, jeez.

Here is Columbus, our bums are kind of boring. But every so often we have college students that pose as bums and panhandle, fake beards and all. That's kind of interesting.