If You See a Father Holding His Child’s Hand, Call the Cops!

[jaguarr]

He does now. Why do you think he doesn't want the cops called on him?

LOL! Okay, now THAT was pretty cold.

jag

 

[Mattchew]

LINK

At first I thought it was some sort of a joke

Anyone call the cops on me for holding my kid hand better start running, I'll bloody give them holy hell. Bloody idjits

ummm... im not sure thats the point, and i THINK you know that.

and just as a question, aren't you FOR people actively making sure your child isnt being sexually abused? There isnt an arrow point to the man's hand that says 'DAD'.

calm down, and hope nobody ever needs to use that number to help your kid.

 

[amazingfantasy15]

The problem with this ad is the way certain people can interpret it and how it makes it so much easier for innocent people to be reported which in the end, even they are innocent, will stain their whole lives and create a stigma about them.

Plus that whole image gives anyone an excuse to call as holding hands is one of the most common things that happen between children and adults, such as holding a childs hand when crossing the street.

It is scary what this says about society and I must say I feel bad for those this could cause great stress through no fault of their own.

However, one thing to point out is this could potentially save one child and therefore, the question becomes what is a price society is willing to pay in order to save one child? Does that price become ever too high because what if that prize causes considerable more harm to others.

The issue is not straitforward.

However, this could harm many more children, when they see their fathers are dragged away by the cops because he held his daughter's hand while they crossed the street. I'm all for keeping children safe, but that imagery doesn't work.

 

[Shedhut]

That is disturbing. Thanks for the info.

spread the word

 

[Manic]

Thing is, anyone keen enough to notice child abuse or sexual abuse in the way a father walks with his child isn't going to need an ad to tell them. It'll be written all over the way the child walks and behaves, whether they're holding hands or not.

 

[Danger Mouse]

ummm... im not sure thats the point, and i THINK you know that.

and just as a question, aren't you FOR people actively making sure your child isnt being sexually abused? There isnt an arrow point to the man's hand that says 'DAD'.

calm down, and hope nobody ever needs to use that number to help your kid.

There isn't an arrow pointing to the man's hand that says 'STRANGER' either.

 

[rdh007]

No, but he could be a priest...

 

[MaskedManJRK]

Uh...how are people getting the "father" idea? I really don't see it.

 

[skorponok]

This is a sad snapshot of our society.....

EXACTLY.

Guess I can't have kids now...

 

[Ring Deacon]

Yes by all means if you notice child abuse report it. But there are people out there that think it is abuse to spank your child. And because of these people you can't correct your kids in public. Who is to say someone doesn't see a father and daughter holding hands and gets offened by it and calls this number? It can and will happen. So poor guys are going to get arested for nothing.

 

[unstoppable]

that's stupid

 

[Mattchew]

There isn't an arrow pointing to the man's hand that says 'STRANGER' either.

wow... im SO sorry non-rapists fathers have to feel weird for 2 seconds as they look at an add. how rough for them.

i've known 7 children who were victims of molestation befroe the age of 10... sadly, I can say that these kids are ruined. they will NEVER be whole human beings.


As a result of spending time with these kids, I know all too well the devisation that results from that kind of violation.

Maybe if some of these FATHERS spent time with a child victim of molestation, he'd be more focused on the monster the comits the crime, and less pissed at the people activley trying to stop that situation while its in progress.

 

[Mattchew]

Yes by all means if you notice child abuse report it. But there are people out there that think it is abuse to spank your child. And because of these people you can't correct your kids in public. Who is to say someone doesn't see a father and daughter holding hands and gets offened by it and calls this number? It can and will happen. So poor guys are going to get arested for nothing.

honestly... how dare you. nobody's been arrested for holding their daughters hands... that is unless the daughter falsely tells authorities something else is going on, in which case the father has bigger fish to fry than a billboard.

as for the spanking comment, this add has NOTHING to do with hitting... it has EVERYTHING to do with sexual abuse, which is CLEARLY not done in public.

The point is, pedophiles DON'T molest children in public... but sometimes there are signs, and if you have ever seen a child destroyed by rape, you would be all for doing everything in your power to make sure it stops as soon as possible and isn't repeated.

 

[Ring Deacon]

I want them to stop it from happening to kids. but i am telling you there will be cases when someone thinks they are doing the right thing and the guy will have done nothing but be a loving parent. I see people all the time get mad when some smacks their kid on the butt for not listening and say "how can you hurt a poor liitle kid like that?" When that poor little kid 5 minutes earlier was breaking everything in site. But i guess you can't punish your kid for that.

There will be guys that fall victim to this by someone who only sees half of what goes on and not what really happned.

 

[Mattchew]

However, this could harm many more children, when they see their fathers are dragged away by the cops because he held his daughter's hand while they crossed the street. I'm all for keeping children safe, but that imagery doesn't work.

grow up. this isn't a law saying you can;t hold you're kids hand!

its an add.

all of these fathers lamenting this add would punch some random guy square in the jaw if he was holding their child's hand as depicted in that picture.

if you're not molesting your child, don't toss and turn @ night about being hauled off to jail cause of this add. Rather, sleep easy knowing we live in a world where the general public is being urged to look out for the well being of your children.

 

[Mattchew]

I want them to stop it from happening to kids. but i am telling you there will be cases when someone thinks they are doing the right thing and the guy will have done nothing but be a loving parent. I see people all the time get mad when some smacks their kid on the butt for not listening and say "how can you hurt a poor liitle kid like that?" When that poor little kid 5 minutes earlier was breaking everything in site. But i guess you can't punish your kid for that.

There will be guys that fall victim to this by someone who only sees half of what goes on and not what really happened.

again... you're mixing the issue.

you're reacting to an add about picking up on the subtle signs sexual abuse by saying 'HEY! I SHOULD BE ABLE TO SPANK MY KIDS!'

Sexual abuse doesn't happen at the grocery store. It happens behind close doors.

This ad doesn't say 'start an angry mob.It simply urges people to be attentive.


To draw a parallel to physical abuse behind close doors, the argument against an ad like this is like saying, 'sure the kid is covered in bruises, but he's probably just rowdy... I don't want to cause problems for the father.'

 

[Manic]

I want them to stop it from happening to kids. but i am telling you there will be cases when someone thinks they are doing the right thing and the guy will have done nothing but be a loving parent. I see people all the time get mad when some smacks their kid on the butt for not listening and say "how can you hurt a poor liitle kid like that?" When that poor little kid 5 minutes earlier was breaking everything in site. But i guess you can't punish your kid for that.

There will be guys that fall victim to this by someone who only sees half of what goes on and not what really happned.

Exactly. Child molestation should be stopped, and we need to find new ways to prevent it, but this ad campaign is irresponsible in the sense that there are far too many people out there who can misinterpret it. Campaigns to stop child abuse have put our society in a place where you can't discipline your child in public without the risk of some random idiot calling social services on you. Campaigns like this can put us on a path where it's not safe to hold your child's hand, or hug them, or show any affection in public.

There has to be a better way to fight child molestation.

 

[Mattchew]

fpr any of you who reacted WITHOUT reading the link:

A) the link its to a blog.

B) the HIGHLY inflammatory title of the post (no unlike the HIGHLY inflammatory title to this thread) is 'If You See a Father Holding His Child’s Hand, Call the Cops!' Sounds like angry mobs across the country are chasing down fathers with pitchforks and torches... lets see what the the text of the post says...

“The ‘Stop It Now’ campaign - just launched locally - will urge people to call a help line if they see an adult whom they suspect of having a sexual relationship with a child.

...................................

WOW! What an evil agenda. OH! Btw, I guess in Norfolk Virginian 'adult' means father'. Regardless, I find this outcry of 'fathers under attack' hilarious. Our government sent out the same message to us, post-9/11 to be vigilant in looking for signs of terrorism. I wonder how many of these fathers in this thread posted about that injustice.

 

[KALEL114]

fpr any of you who reacted WITHOUT reading the link:

A) the link its to a blog.

B) the HIGHLY inflammatory title of the post (no unlike the HIGHLY inflammatory title to this thread) is 'If You See a Father Holding His Child’s Hand, Call the Cops!' Sounds like angry mobs across the country are chasing down fathers with pitchforks and torches... lets see what the the text of the post says...

“The ‘Stop It Now’ campaign - just launched locally - will urge people to call a help line if they see an adult whom they suspect of having a sexual relationship with a child.

...................................

WOW! What an evil agenda. OH! Btw, I guess in Norfolk Virginian 'adult' means father'. Regardless, I find this outcry of 'fathers under attack' hilarious. Our government sent out the same message to us, post-9/11 to be vigilant in looking for signs of terrorism. I wonder how many of these fathers in this thread posted about that injustice.

Whoa calm down cowboy. You don't seem to see what our issue is. Child abuse is bad. We all agree. The campaign is great in the cause of stopping child abuse. We all agree. This particular ad is the issue in that it is vague and leads to a broad interpretation of it's meaning. That's all. It's not about the title of threads or someones blog.

 

[Mattchew]

Exactly. Child molestation should be stopped, and we need to find new ways to prevent it, but this ad campaign is irresponsible in the sense that there are far too many people out there who can misinterpret it. Campaigns to stop child abuse have put our society in a place where you can't discipline your child in public without the risk of some random idiot calling social services on you. Campaigns like this can put us on a path where it's not safe to hold your child's hand, or hug them, or show any affection in public.

There has to be a better way to fight child molestation.

You're TOTALLY missing the point. I don't know what world you live in, but people don't get thrown in jail after someone makes a call.

Furthermore... FOR THE BILLIONTH TIME THIS ISN'T AN ADD AGAINST PHYSICAL ABUSE IN PUBLIC!

Equating spanking your child in public to touching a child in a slightly sexually suggestive way in public is silly.

You're all being silly and internalizing the image of a man holding a child's hand.

You're not the only adult who will hold your child's hand.

You are not with your child 24/7.

If some person is acting oddly with your child, you would only PRAY that a person take the advice of this ad and take action.

 

[Mattchew]

Whoa calm down cowboy. You don't seem to see what our issue is. Child abuse is bad. We all agree. The campaign is great in the cause of stopping child abuse. We all agree. This particular ad is the issue in that it is vague and leads to a broad interpretation of it's meaning. That's all. It's not about the title of threads or someones blog.

No. The theme of the criticism in this thread is err on the side of protecting the adult.

Having had extended interaction with children who are victims of rape, I would STRONGLY suggest that erring on the side of protecting the child is a good bet 100% of the time.

It may cause some awkwardness. It may require questions to be answered.
However, in America we have a fairly good justice system and people don't get hauled off to jail cause a stranger saw them holding their child's hand.

The Ad CLEARLY is saying pay attention for more suggestive things, but in the sense of decency they depict a bit more tame image as to A) not harm the child in the picture and B) emotionally wreck people looking at the ad.

For any father who looks at this ad and sees it as an attack, rather than an aid... you need to start looking at things on more than simply the surface level. You're a father, and the world isn't so cut and dry.

 

[Danger Mouse]

So, someone has to access the blog first to determine the actual intention of the advertisement?

Whilst I understand that the intention behind the advertisement is noble to say the least, I find that it does not convey it properly.

The Ad CLEARLY is saying pay attention for more suggestive things, but in the sense of decency they depict a bit more tame image as to A) not harm the child in the picture and B) emotionally wreck people looking at the ad.

I disagree. The ad does not clearly spell that out.

 

[Mattchew]

Let me explain where I'm coming from....

I worked with a program mentoring at-risk youth.

At-risk is an umbrella term meaning anything from low-income, single parent home, behavior issues, etc. In other words, the kids we dealt with had a wide variety of issues.

After a few years with the program I start dealing directly with the social worker at the school these kids attended, and as a result became more aware of their specific troubles.

The most horrific case we had was with a girl in our program who was raped. It was someone in the neighborhood that committed the crime. After everything came to light, it turned out tat the molestation had gone on for 3 years when the girl was 5 to 8 years old.

Everyone in her neighborhood found out, because it was obviously a salacious story and as a result someone from the school found out and told her class mates. As a second grader this girl's entire class knew she'd been raped.

I can tell you, this child and every other child in the same situation wore the deviation on their faces every day.

The real tragedy, is that the next door neighbor to this guy had seen him tickling this girl on numerous occasions. She said she thought it was strange, but she just decided she'd keep an eye open and not say anything.

Avoiding THIS is the the point of these ads. If you think otherwise, like for instance their goal is to persecute fathers...

Well, I guess your skewed perception of things wont improve your parenting skills.

 

[Danger Mouse]

Well, I guess your skewed perception of things wont improve your parenting skills.

As I said, I understand the nobility and the urgency behind the advertisement. But it's not my allegedly skewed perception I'm concerned about. It's the skewed perception of some portion of the public who might see this ad and start reporting EVERY SINGLE MAN who holds a child's hand without first evaluating the situation.

Would it hurt to add some sort of written warning in the ad to the effect of "IF YOU SEE SOME SUSPICIOUS GUY HOLDING A CHILD'S HAND, THEN PLEASE CALL THE COPS" and not having a blanket statement to report any guy who holds a child?

 

[Manic]

You're TOTALLY missing the point. I don't know what world you live in, but people don't get thrown in jail after someone makes a call.

No, but people do get investigated. A parent's worst fear is to have their child ripped away from them, and although it may never happen to said parent, they become confronted with that fear when some total stranger walks into their house and tells them they might be a horrible parent.

Furthermore... FOR THE BILLIONTH TIME THIS ISN'T AN ADD AGAINST PHYSICAL ABUSE IN PUBLIC!

Equating spanking your child in public to touching a child in a slightly sexually suggestive way in public is silly.

Okay, wow. No one said this was about physical abuse. I said strangers misinterpret discipline as physical abuse. Imagine that same person mistaking an innocent act as a sign of molestation. The two acts aren't the same, clearly. But it's the same kind of misunderstanding. I think that's what some of us have been trying to say, but you've been missing.

You're all being silly and internalizing the image of a man holding a child's hand.

You're not the only adult who will hold your child's hand.

You are not with your child 24/7.

If some person is acting oddly with your child, you would only PRAY that a person take the advice of this ad and take action.

Well, no kidding you would pray someone notices your child behaving strangely with someone. But you don't need an ad to tell you what one of those situations look like. The ad is good for giving us a number to call, yes, but the image of someone holding a child's hand is misleading. Any smart person can tell the difference between innocent hand-holding and someone dragging away a victim, but those smart people don't need a billboard to tell them so. It's the paranoid and less rational people who see the ad that we're all afraid of; the person who sees this ad, and starts looking suspiciously at every adult holding a child's hand. And we know those people exist, because they are the same type of person who mistakes disciplinary acts with physical abuse due to the same types of campaign ads (see the point I was making earlier?).