If you've seen it, your reviews here

[kane9321]

There are spoilers ahead.DO NOT read this if you have not seen the movie.

I have a question for all of you...What is 250 + 50 ? What is probably the best action flick of the Millenium ? What gave not one but both of my eyes a hard on tonight ? What action movie will never be topped ? If you answered 300 to all of these questions then you're on the right track.I saw this amazing movie with Gilmore last night.A couple of hours ago actually.I went to the 10:40pm showing.I saw Gaby there which was an omen saying "David,There is Gaby...this movie will kill you".I went in there knowing this but I still went.A lot like the Spartan warriors in the movie.

This movie will motivate anyone to do something.Leonidas is the Great great great great great great great Grandfather of Charles Bronson.You might be asking yourself..."What kind of name is Leonidas?,It sounds like a disease"Yeah if I could have Leonidas Disease...I would.It would entitle me to kick everyones ass and then be home in time for some Meatloaf.Then after that I could go behead some guys,and come home once again to make love to Gorgon haha.I want Leonidas disease so bad..if it were true.This guy could convince anyone of anything.

He could come up to me right now and say "David you are a midget named Doris and have an abusive husband"...I would reply "...I know" and start crying.This guy is the man,coming in a close second to Mr.Bronson.The damn kids start out being judged to see if they have any inperfections.If any are found they are thrown over a cliff.Much like that one time in Ireland where I killed 7-8 Goats.

So they are trained from birth to kill,and be proud.Leonidas is one bad ass double dollar mother ****er..he could destroy everything.He went more along the route of Ragnarok(The greatest battle with all of the Norse Gods fighting to the death) where as it's better to die in battle with pride then to just not fight at all.Leonidas has some guy from Persia come to see him and ask him if he wants to merge with Xerxes.Leonidas will not have any of it.He kicks the bastard in some hole along with all of his buddies. They go off on some journey because they technically cannot go to war because the most beautiful Oracle said they would perish.

Does Leonidas care? NOT AT ALL!He's bad ass,what does some naked ballet dancer know? Apparently a lot but who cares.What come next is one of 10,000 amazing fights...and by 10,000 I mean 4 or 5.If you do not have a beard this movie will make you grow one.Maybe go out and shave someones head and glue some on.This movie will make you want to be a Spartan.They fight mutants in this movie,and some big ass animals.They cut off horse legs,and push elephants off a cliff.....they show the elephants land and all in the ground below.

The blood effects in this movie,and decapitations are done so well.It's like watching a beautiful symphony of death paint itself on screen.So first the messenger comes and then Leonidas is like..."Hmm THIS IS SPARTA!!"Kicks him down and goes off like I said before and comes into contact with some dudes..the Archadians..or how I liked to look at them OPERATION DEATH.They were there to fight and help the Spartans a little bit.They were all a bunch of non fighters.They fought Cheech Marins people first,and then build a wall out of thier bodies.

Well rocks,and use the bodies as **** to hold it together.BEAUTIFUL,as was the tree layered with dead people.Then they fight the Immortals(Xerxes personal Army).The Immortals have some mutant beast with them.****...before this battle with the Immortals some Corky/Sloth hybrid asks Leonidas if he can join,becuase he was a defect Spartan but his Dad left cause he wanted his boy to live.Leonidas says in the best possible way "Get away freak".That seals his fate later on in the movie but Leonidas. doesn't give a ****.I will not give anymore away but Xerxes is played by some Brazillian actor I will call Pele.

Really great actor.Every part in this movie was played so well.I want Gerrard to be the priest that marries me and my woman.Damn this movie had so much ass kicking I thought I was watching a actual war.The woman in the Orgy scene were....damn..as was the Oracle,and Queen Gorgon.Every woman,even the ugly one,was beautiful.THIS MOVIE IS GOD.I give away spoilers in this because I do not care...You should have seen it already. Haha...might see it again Tuesday.

the greatest review in the history of reviews

 

[terry78]

^So basically the movie kicked you in the balls and raped your girlfriend, is what you're getting at.

 

[ゴジラ]

^So basically the movie kicked you in the balls and raped your girlfriend, is what you're getting at.

The movie not only kicked me in the balls..it kicked me in every spot on my body at the same exact time leaving me spitting up blood and wanting more.As for my girlfriend she was raped,and afterwards she asked for seconds.

 

[Borat]

The movie not only kicked me in the balls..it kicked me in every spot on my body at the same exact time leaving me spitting up blood and wanting more.As for my girlfriend she was raped,and afterwards she asked for seconds.

lmfao!! same here man. i told my gf to dump me and date a real champion. i just felt like a ***** after watching that movie.

 

[Forever is over]

No joke dude. After watching this movie I felt like I should do some crunches or go jogging. Something interesting about this movie, which I have now seen four times, is that at first sight it seems very much like a man's movie but honestly the Queen always seems to get the biggest reaction from the audience. I wont mention which scene because of spoilers but anyone who has seen the movie knows what I mean. I think women will really respond well to her and may give the movie more of an audience than initially thought.

 

[chesslover]

I've seen it zero times

 

[Jim Hall]

Just when I think that these comic book movies can't get any better, they go and prove me wrong. Absolutely wonderful. . .the battle scenes were great, the choreography was great, the visual effects were great, the performances were great, and the comic was left intact.

The success of this film was well deserved. I can't wait to see it again (IMAX this time)!

 

[PWN3R]

This movie was amazing. My only complaint is that they didn't find a way to work in the song "Now You're A Man" by DVDA. Of course I doubt that even crossed the filmmaker's minds, but it would have been even more epic. I love this movie.

 

[SolidSnakeMGS]

Loved the movie. Usually hate the slow-mo to speed-up (and vice versa) type film techniques, but it worked so well here. In fact, I wanted MORE OF THEM, which is always a good sign in terms of not abusing or over-using something. You give the audience just what they need, no more to make them drunk off of the visuals.

Leonidas is truly a badass. Loved the close-ups of his eyes at the end of the movie.

The momentum of the film is amazing. All in all, a great experience and a great visceral movie.

 

[Mr. Socko]

The movie not only kicked me in the balls..it kicked me in every spot on my body at the same exact time leaving me spitting up blood and wanting more.As for my girlfriend she was raped,and afterwards she asked for seconds.

LMAO! Hilarious, and loved your review.

 

[SolidSnakeMGS]

This movie raped my fish, kicked me in the forehead, overflowed my toilet, and drank my last beer...and I loved every second of it.

 

[pyromaniac]

"Homophobic" is an incredibly stupid term based around 3rd grade logic that if you don't agree then you're afraid.

Just because people don't like male nudity doesn't mean they are homophobic...it means THEY DON'T LIKE IT. That's it.


Oh and I loved the movie. Just tired of the stupid "homophobic" term.

But they don't mind female nudity?

And what about the females in regards to female nudity...? I don't hear anyone complaining about that - yet.

Does the difference lie in sexualisation, stylization or execution...?

Whatever it is, it is why we usually are confronted with overt female nudity much more than male nudity in the media...!

 

[Nell2ThaIzzay]

I'm beginning to think that this may be the most over-rated movie in the history of movies...

 

[Crooklyn]

Whatever it is, it is why we usually are confronted with overt female nudity much more than male nudity in the media...!

Because the female body is clearly the most desirable.

 

[I_Hate_U_All]

You're not alone, Nell. But bite your tounge though, or be burned by the fire breath of this internet beast we know as HYPE.

 

[OverMyHead]

http://bventertainment.go.com/tv/buenavista/ebertandroeper/

 

[muertevilla]

I havent seen it. But i didnt need to hear it from that dude to know it was a thumbs up.

 

[dpbrave84]

I'm beginning to think that this may be the most over-rated movie in the history of movies...

just like LOTR and sin city...great movies but over hyped....its ok it always happens when alot of ppl like a movie....and then there are always the ones hating on the movie

 

[L.A.]

**** am I the only one that hasnt seen 300

 

[BRUTAL]

Good god...

 

[ComicChick]

i have a feeling this thread will be moved

 

[Sam Fisher]

"This is not the forum you're looking for. Move along."

 

[ComicChick]

**** am I the only one that hasnt seen 300

no, i havent seen it either

 

[Motown Marvel]

the citizen kane of graphic novels? great novel, but not quite the citizen kane.....coughwatchmencough.

 

[Sam Fisher]

Quite honestly, I have no interest in seeing this.