LatinoReview's Script Review is updated - Please, merge if needed

[Kanon]

I'm truly sorry for not taking more time to search for the right thread. Please merge if this is already known, and discussed somewhere else.

LatinoReview's just updated their script review with more super spoilerish stuff. And really controversial ****!

Go to the bottom for the new details
http://www.latinoreview.com/scriptreview.php?id=73

Spoiler

MASSIVE SPOILER TERRITORY!

I HAVE RECENTLY COME UNDER REX LEE/THE DOCTOR/COBRA COMMANDER’S MIND CONTROL THROUGH THE NANOMITES BEHIND THE INCISION SCAR OF MY RIGHT EAR JUST LIKE ANA LEWIS AKA THE BARONESS AKA COBRA COMMANDER’S SISTER IN THE MOVIE!

IN OTHER WORDS EL MAYIMBE IS NOW A MEMBER OF THE DIABOLICAL COBRA ORGANIZATION!

I’VE GONE ROGUE COURTESY OF AMY POWELL, THE SR VP OF INTERACTIVE MARKETING OVER AT PARAMOUNT!

SO YOU WANT TO KNOW MORE HUH?!

WHICH GIJOE ACTUALLY DIES? HOW?

COVERGIRL GETS IMPALED BY STORM SHADOW’S KATANA BLADE WHEN SHE ENTERS HAWK’S STATEROOM. STORM SHADOW THEN STABS HAWK IN THE GUT PARALYZING HIM.

WHO DOES ZARTAN CLONE?

THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES AT THE END OF THE MOVIE THERFORE LEAVING IT WIDE OPEN FOR THE SEQUEL! ZARTAN SPENT 18 MONTHS STUDYING THE PRESIDENT, LEARNING HIS MANNERISMS, ADOPTING HIS EATING HABITS, AND LOSING SIXTY PERCENT OF HIS OWN MUSCLE MASS.

WHAT’S UP WITH COBRA COMMANDER?

DUKE’S BEST FRIEND IN THE BEGINNING OF THE MOVIE IS MEDICAL OFFICER REX LEE. DUKE IS GONNA MARRY REX’S SISTER ANA (aka the soon to be Baroness). REX WILL BE BEST MAN. DUKE PROMISES ANA TO TAKE CARE OF REX ON A MISSION THAT GOES TO HELL. REX IS SUPPOSEDLY KILLED OR SO WE THINK. REX REAPPEARS AS THE MASKED DOCTOR WHO BREATHES THROUGH A MASK AND BY THE END OF THE MOVIE BECOMES THE COBRA COMMANDER. THOSE JFX ONLINE PICTURES THAT LEAKED OF THE BARONESS? THAT IS ANA AT HER BROTHER’S REX FUNERAL. ANA THINKS REX IS STILL DEAD AND DOESN’T KNOW THE DOCTOR WORKING AT MARS IS HER BROTHER.

HOW DOES THE BARONESS BECOME DECOBRAY AND WHY?
SHE MARRIES LEON DECOBRAY WHO RUNS A LAB IN FRANCE. HE WEAPONIZES DESTRO’S WARHEADS. SHE IN TURN, DIVORCES HIM.

DIDN’T THE BARONESS HAVE FEELINGS FOR DUKE? WHAT GIVES?

SHE IS UNDER HER BROTHER’S MIND CONTROL. HAS A SMALL INCISION SCAR BEHIND HER RIGHT EAR. IT’S ALL ABOUT MIND CONTROL AND NANOTECHNOLOGY FOLKS.

ANY BIG TIME DESTRUCTION IN THE FILM?

OH YEAH! DESTRO GETS EVEN WITH THE FRENCH AND TOPPLES OVER THE EIFFEL TOWER! IT COMES CRASHING DOWN INTO THE SEINE. NANOMITES EAT THE **** OUT OF IT.

ANYTHING ELSE HAPPENS?

YEAH, DUKE GETS CAUGHT BY THE BAD GUYS JUST LIKE HE DID IN THE CARTOONS BACK IN THE DAY.

WHERE IS MARS HEADQUARTERS?

AT THE POLAR ICE CAPS UNDERWATER

HOW DO THE JOES GET THERE?

IN THE NIGHT RAVEN

DOES DESTRO WEAR HIS FAMOUS MASK?

AT THE END. HIS FACE GETS BURNED THAT THE NANOMITES FORM A MASK AROUND MCCULLEN’S FACE HENCE DESTRO IS BORN.

ANY COOL TECH?

YEAH, THE JOES HAVE MARK ONE ACCELERATOR SUITS LIKE THAT VIDEO GAME CRYSIS. MAKES YOU RUN FASTER, JUMP HIGHER AND HIT HARDER. BAD ASS!

SO NOW YOU KNOW!

 

[The Avatar]

ugh, not a fan of some of those plot points.

 

[DocHoliday]

I am happy to see his anticipation for seeing the film.

 

[QueerMike]

I'm not feelin' this.

 

[K.B.]

What a p.o.s.! This will BLOW. It's g.i. joe in name only (and even that is up for debate). Seems like the only thing worth seeing in this is going to be SE and SS (and thats praying they haven't screwed that up either with dumbass costumes).


Sigh.....................honestly, how friggin hard is it to make a g.i. joe flick?

 

[Wolverine_05]

Wow, that sounds awful. Everything about this is pissing me off.

 

[SHADOWBAT69]

OMG, is this frickin' real? This is terrible, imo. Sounds like no one is even in their actual "character" costumes until the very end. The whole Baroness/CC/Duke story sounds like it belongs on the CW. Accelerator suits!? WTF! LMAO. Toy sales anyone? Also, the Night Raven is a friggin Cobra jet, not transportation for Joes. Or, maybe, gasp!!, did they capture the jet!? Dun Dun Dun! I have no ecitement for this movie at all.



DISCLAIMER: Im basing my comments on the prospect that the spoilers I just read are from the actual movie script.

 

[Kanon]

DISCLAIMER: Im basing my comments on the prospect that the spoilers I just read are from the actual movie script.

I have my doubts too, but it's consistent with the pic of the baroness in the funeral...

 

[Rogles]

Wait a minute didn't this guy already read the script a while back and went ga-ga over it? What gives? At any rate, this guy still needs to learn about lower-case letters.

EDIT: Man, I can't tell if he's being serious or sarcastic or what.

 

[TheVileOne]

I wonder what this was about and why Paramount let this leak, unless some of these might've been tweaked.

Mind controlled Baroness . . . Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. El Mayimbe in one of his stupid rants basically did confirm no Scarlett/Snake Eyes in the movie though since it doesn't "work" or some crap like that.

Ripcord/Scarlett here we come.

 

[SHADOWBAT69]

Ya know, when all this movie stuff began and there started to be alot of fan backlash about what we were hearing, Hasbro made the public statement of how they were not going to allow this to be anything but G.I. Joe that fans have known and loved for years. Well, was that all just fluff? Cuz Im not seeing what I grew up with.

 

[copywrite]

How come the link doesn't work and there is nothing at Latino Review about his?

Anyway, the only thing that's different from the comics is Rex/Duke/Baroness thing. Big deal, it's more interesting this way.

 

[copywrite]

Mind controlled Baroness . . . Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. El Mayimbe in one of his stupid rants basically did confirm no Scarlett/Snake Eyes in the movie though since it doesn't "work" or some crap like that.
Ripcord/Scarlett here we come.

Ugh, you're still on about this. He never implied that, you are just taking what he said way out of context. I'm starting to think you actually want to see Ripcord/Scarlett since you won't let it go.

 

[Theweepeople]

I feel like I'm about to experience all those angry emotions I felt when the transformers script was reviewed. Fortunately, some changes were made and the movie turned out to be okay for me despite all of it's flaws. However, this script sounds worse then the transformers one. I'm glad I was only a moderate GI Joe fan during my childhood. I'm still wondering how Lorenzo Di Bonaventura got work from Paramount after warner brothers fired him for ruining the Batman franchise and for wasting millions on the ill-fated superman lives project.

 

[Bug-Eyed Earl]

I really don't see why the bad guys have to be mind controlled.

On the other hand, Destro and the Baroness were trying to kill CC within the first 20 issues and vice versa. Maybe Rex is just smarter than the used car salesman.

And the mind control thing was in the comics- in the later issues, after several characters had severed ties with CC and Hama apparently had to bring back the old status quo.

And the acclerator armor is not that ridiculous- the military is working on similar exo-skeletons now- we could definitely have something similar long before we have, sat, BAT troops.

And I like the idea that Zartan has to work fairly hard on his disguises.

Conan the Barbarion couldn't be more different from the books, except for scenes taken from various novels, and it's one of my favorite movies, so I'm not too upset yet. Nothing I've read is as big a change as the origin of Conan in the movie.

 

[Hotwire]

What a p.o.s.! This will BLOW. It's g.i. joe in name only (and even that is up for debate). Seems like the only thing worth seeing in this is going to be SE and SS (and thats praying they haven't screwed that up either with dumbass costumes).


Sigh.....................honestly, how friggin hard is it to make a g.i. joe flick?

With out making it look just like a live-qaction cartoon, nearly impossible.

 

[TheVileOne]

Ugh, you're still on about this. He never implied that, you are just taking what he said way out of context. I'm starting to think you actually want to see Ripcord/Scarlett since you won't let it go.

I'm just curious why he would post all that stupid ******** on hisstank.

 

[Gotham]

It'll still most likely be a fun ride. And we're seeing Snake Eyes this week!

 

[K.B.]

With out making it look just like a live-qaction cartoon, nearly impossible.

Wrong. Sorry you just are.

Superman, Spider-man 1+2, X-men 2, Transformers.....not exactly looking like a live action cartoon on screen. Looked like people who genuienly loved the source material and us believe in the world/characters.

 

[Hotwire]

Wrong. Sorry you just are.

Superman, Spider-man 1+2, X-men 2, Transformers.....not exactly looking like a live action cartoon on screen. Looked like people who genuienly loved the source material and us believe in the world/characters.

Didn't say it was totaly impossible, just nearly impossible.

 

[Philly Phanboy]

It sounds like the screenplay writers adapted their version of G.I. Joe from the Korean version of the comics and none of the writers could actually read Korean or even bother to get them translated.

 

[xisaacx]

very disappointing, i hope its not true

how RELIABLE is this latinoreviews site?

 

[protocida]

Sounds good.

 

[Sarracenia]

Sounds great! I love the 80's Joes as much as the next but this sounds like a great translation to the big screen. I want believability not some mortal-kombatish crap.

A little concerned about the Baroness arc (since she's my fave) but I'm just happy she's in it.

Cheers from me!

 

[Raiden]

Ugh, those plot points are terrible, and if they are actually in the script I don't think GI JOE will turn out any better than Sumner's Van Helsing. As a GI JOE fan, I'm very disappointed.