Movie sites April Fools

[Antonello Blueberry]

http://www.moviehole.net/news/20070401_moore_to_play_scully_in_xfiles.html

Another month … another makeover for a popular film franchise.
Hot on the heels of David Duchovny’s comments that the next “X-Files” movie is being brokered as we speak comes news from CarterEsque.com that co-star Gillian Anderson – who has played his sciency subordinate since the series’ commencement in 1993 – has opted out of the new film.
Reports say Twentieth Century Fox is now in talks with Julianne Moore to replace Anderson as Agent Dana Scully. A deal is expected to be made before the end of the month.
Anderson, whose star has risen considerably in the past couple of years (she recently appeared in the Oscar Winning “King of Scotland”), says via her reps that “[X-Files] has been a wonderful experience, and I will always cherish my time on the series [and] the film, but the time has come to move on - I just don’t believe I can bring anything more to the character at this point. I wish the filmmakers my heartfelt best”.
Ironically, Julianne Moore also took over from Jodie Foster when she decided not to reprise her role as Agent Clarice Starling in “Hannibal”, the “Silence of the Lambs” follow-up, a couple of years back.
“The X-Files 2” will be the third film for Duchovny and Moore. They previously co-starred together in “Evolution” and the recent “Trust the Man”.
Thanks to ‘Loof Lirpa’

http://www.joblo.com/brad-pitt-quits-acting

actually heard this rumor a couple of weeks ago, but I guess this makes it official. I doubt that he really means it, but I guess this means no chance of a FIGHT CLUB 2. Yippee. Sigh. Read the press release below:
Brad Pitt quits acting; concentrate on family
Friday, March 31,11:56 PM ET

Los Angeles -- American actor Brad Pitt announced last night that he would no longer be acting in movies, and that he was going to be focusing the rest of his life on his family and helping the world become a better place. Pitt, who just finished his "last film" with director David Fincher entitled "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button", said that as much as he used to love acting in his earlier years, he simply can't seem to find the passion one requires to do the work these days, "I just can't keep pretending that I'm challenged by my acting roles anymore. My eyes have been opened to the world."
Pitt, very pensive, and who over the past two years has confirmed a relationship with fellow thespian Angelina Jolie, wants to focus on his growing family with Jolie -- which now includes four children -- and get into more humanitarian efforts, much like Angelina. Pitt said that he would finish up the remaining four projects to which he's already contractually obligated, including his "last movie ever" with director Marc Foster entitled "Dallas Buyer's Club", and then sell all of his belongings in Hollywood and move to a Castle in Ireland with Jolie and their children, so that they can have closer access to Africa and the other countries to which they're always traveling and buying kids.

​

"We've got so much money that it doesn't matter if I don't work another day in my life...", said Pitt, as he joked about how Jolie would now be the "bread earner" in the family. Referring back to one of his earlier roles in Tony Scott's "True Romance", Pitt said that he "wasn't gonna pull a Floyd" and just sit around in his dirty underwear and smoke pot all day, but did say that he had always enjoyed smoking marijuana, and that the laws in many of these other countries allowed him to smoke it, without all the hassle. He also said that most of the other countries have "better ****".
The good news for fans of the "Tomb Raider" series is that Jolie also announced that she has signed on for three more sequels to the smash videogame series, each of which will feature her in "less and less clothing". Jolie joked that by the 5th film in the series, "...we might actually turn it into an X-rated movie entitled "Boob Raider", in which different archeological nerds take turns tit-mashing me".

Pitt, who has made peace with his past, didn't seem to have any issues burning his Hollywood bridges now that he's "seen the light". Pitt confirmed that Fincher's "Fight Club" was actually a subconscious call for all men to become homosexual, and that he once slept with Tom Cruise and Antonio Banderas, but that "we only kissed and ****". He also confirmed that "Bruce Willis knows how to party" and that George Clooney, well...nothing bad to say about George Clooney, apparently he's just a class act, all around!
When Pitt was asked about which role he would remember most in his later years, he replied "Kalifornia because I was so totally baked during that entire shoot" and "The Devil's Own" because he apparently tried his Irish accent out "as a joke", but the director liked it, so they actually kept it in the movie. "That's part of the problem I have with Hollywood. As much as I had some good times early on in my career, the womanizing, boozing, the coke, the ****es, the handjobs-- and most of that was just a weekend at Charlie Sheen's place-- I ultimately didn't grow as a human being and I tend to agree with sites like JoBlo.com that say that Hollywood has just gotten too predictable, too safe and too sequel and remake hungry."
Pitt, who used to secretly date the webmaster of JoBlo.com, Berge Garabedian (aka JoBlo), wouldn't admit to the "cheap plug" for his buddy's website, but apparently Mr. Garabedian didn't mind at all, "Is he single again?" No, Mr. Garabedian, Mr. Brad Pitt is not single, but he is cool enough to appreciate our annual April Fool's Day gag, which this year, is also 100% untrue from top to bottom. Thanks for playing along, folks.

 

[Antonello Blueberry]

http://www.darkhorizons.com/news07/070401e.php

ight Over Who'll Play John Holmes By Garth FranklinSunday April 1st 2007 12:19am

I've often heard fights between men over who has got the biggest penis, but now one such fight is literally becoming headline news.

A casting battle in ensuing over DJ Caruso's upcoming John Holmes biopic over at New Line Cinema. Various actors are throwing their hats in to play the man who remains arguably the 20th century's most famous porn star.

At present Edward Norton remains tipped to take the role, but none other than Justin Timberlake is campaigning hard to slip on the fake dong (although rumours say he may not need one) and perform the role says Contact Film.

The film will take a darkly comic, but ultimately tragic look at Holmes' life including the drug abuse and waning years as he succumbed to AIDS. More importantly though it's said to be featuring real sex scenes ala "Shortbus," so whichever star takes it will certainly have to measure up.

Talks are also apparently underway for other roles in the film which include Ron Jeremy, Tracy Lords and Harry Reems. The film will also be displayed using the Real 3D technology (sadly no IMAX co-release planned). A Summer 2008 theatrical rollout is expected.

http://www.darkhorizons.com/news07/070401f.php

Casting Couch: Bond, Galactus, Indiana
By Garth FranklinSunday April 1st 2007 12:20am

"Another day another Bond rumour, though this is a fun one. Seems that former 007 Timothy Dalton is set to have a small but key role in the next Bond film due for release late 2008, but the producers aren't specifying what role exactly. Rumour is that a last act twist will see Judi Dench killed as retribution for Bond's actions in the next film, and Dalton will be lined up as her replacement..." (full details)

"James Earl Jones is set to play the voice of Galactus in the upcoming "Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer". The much talked about debate over what Galactus will look like comes down to a nightmare sequence which will show him in the famous humanoid form - in the rest of the film he'll be more a 'Chronicles of Riddick'/'Dune'-esque holy army of ships in the form of his visage..." (full details)

Johnathan Rhys-Davies will reprise his role of Sallah in the upcoming fourth "Indiana Jones" film. He isn't the only one back either, seems that a key role will be that of the daughter of Willie Scott (Kate Capshaw) with many speculating that this is likely the role of Cate Blanchett in the film. Production gets underway in June in Los Angeles..." (full details)

 

[Antonello Blueberry]

http://www.darkhorizons.com/news07/070401b.php

The A-Team" Finally Moving Forward By Garth FranklinSunday April 1st 2007 12:11am

This past TV season the big gamble was on serial dramas, with numerous ones falling flat on their face - though one or two like "Heroes," "Jericho" and "Ugly Betty" have become major hits.

Next year though there's two trends - British series remakes ("Life on Mars," "Footballers' Wives," "Blackpool") and the revival of familiar properties.

Amongst the later are TV series versions of "Mr. and Mrs. Smith," "The Terminator" films, the resurrection of 30's noir detective Phillip Marlowe, and a revival of the old "The Bionic Woman".

The team behind the bionic babe's return however have an even more ambitious plan in the works - bringing "The A-Team" back to the screen. Casting notices have gone out for a four-hour NBC mini-series to air next February which would serve as a backdoor pilot for a new series starting next Fall should it rate well.

The move makes sense considering the show remains one of NBC's most widely recognisable properties. Whilst the beleaguered network has had a few hits this year, it needs a few more household name shows (esp. in the key demographic) to shake off its lacklustre image of recent years.

What's surprising though is those casting notices have revealed some unexpected changes to the formula. The premise remains the same with four wrongly convicted Special Forces personnel escaping custody and now working as mercenaries for hire who help the oppressed.

Some changes are to be expected, like the updating of them being veterans of the Iraq war rather than the Vietnam war. Others are welcome ones - the series looks like it will spend time reflecting on the darker side of their new life as mercenaries, some of the brutality, isolation and betrayal that comes with the work they do.

What'll surprise people is the character changes - specifically the fact that one of the four will be a woman this time. No it's not Faceman, Dirk Benedict has escaped another gender reimagining, rather it's the one and only B.A. Baracus. The role made famous by Mr. T is being recast with a woman in mind, and rapper Lil' Kim is said to be in talks for the part.

Finally other characters from the pantheon, including Lynch and Stockwell, appear in the mini-series and will serve as regular antagonists should a full series order be given.

http://www.darkhorizons.com/news07/070401c.php

Smurfs, Ulysses, Gold Are Coming Back
By Garth FranklinSunday April 1st 2007 12:14am

With "TMNT" having been released, "Transformers" a few months from delivery, and the likes of "Battle of the Planets" and "Astro Boy" on the way, there's a fight going on to turn famous cartoon properties into money makers again. Talk of three such properties emerged this past week.

The most solid one right now is "The Smurfs". According to The Herald Telegraph it seems that Sydney-based visual effects company Vertigo, a group of former Animal Logic animators who were behind the designs on last year's major hit "Happy Feet," are already in pre-production on a CG animated feature based on the classic cartoon of a village of tiny blue-skinned creatures. Voice casting will take place later this year and Warner Bros. is expected to release the film Summer 2009.

Relatively reliable is word from Moviehole.com that with "Battlestar Galactica" likely to end next season, The Sci-Fi Channel is already looking at other properties to fill it. One potential candidate? A Dean Devlin-produced live action reinvention of the French-Japanese anime series "Ulysses 31". The original series reinvented the Greek legend of Odysseus into a 31st century sci-fi setting. Much of the series has the character, captain of the ship Odyssey, facing off sci-fi reinventions of creatures from Greek mythology as he goes in search of the Kingdom of Hades in order to get back to Earth.

Finally, French production company CineMaxia have apparently picked up the rights for a remake of the beloved, but hard to find cartoon series "The Mysterious Cities of Gold". The 16th-century set series mixes South American history, archaeology and science fiction in its tale of a group of kids and adults in search of El Dorado, one of the lost cities of gold. Whether this will be a live-action or animated take, big or small screen is unknown at present.

 

[SWAT]

Dark Horizons have gone April fool's crazy...

 

[Antonello Blueberry]

Dark Horizons have gone April fool's crazy...

There are 5 more over there.

 

[vampireslayer97]

I forgot all about today. I can't believe I actually felt for the X-Files one lol.

 

[PWN3R]

Don't forget tonight's supposed premiere of Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Moive for Theatres on adult swim.

 

[Movies205]

This is my favorite so far

Jumping on the hype of the Terminator show "Sarah Conner Chronicles" SONY will launch a new one hour weekly series featuring RoboCop's partner Anne Lewis as well as other Detroit police officers going on their own adventures.

Sony had initially thought of releasing a ROBOCOP remake through its genre label, Screen Gems, with Sony-based producer Mike DeLuca overseeing it, but the studio lost interest in the project.

The TV Series, currently titled: "Anne Lewis - Detroit Police" will take place BEFORE RoboCop1, and is taking the same approach as hit tv-series SMALLVILLE, (featuring a young Superman) in which that it won't follow the current time line of the movies. Sony confirms this by saying that ALEX MURPHY will indeed appear in the show but that he won't ever be transformed into ROBOCOP in any of the episodes. Instead it will focus on the everyday work and private life of a young police woman.

As far as Casting goes negotiations are currently being made with NANCY ALLEN, but not for the title role. Possibly she could be playing Lewis mother or some Detroit police chief. PAUL VERHOEVEN has been rumored as being asked to direct the pilot episode but has apparently declined.

Filming of the pilot will begin early this summer.

SOURCE:
* sonymovies.com/april/lewis-detroitpolice.asp
* sony.com/april/robocop.php

www.robocoparchive.com

 

[Furious Styles]

"Another day another Bond rumour, though this is a fun one. Seems that former 007 Timothy Dalton is set to have a small but key role in the next Bond film due for release late 2008, but the producers aren't specifying what role exactly. Rumour is that a last act twist will see Judi Dench killed as retribution for Bond's actions in the next film, and Dalton will be lined up as her replacement..."

Am I the only one who wants to see this happen?

 

[Noir]

Am I the only one who wants to see this happen?

I'm with you!

 

[odiin]

Am I the only one who wants to see this happen?

I really like Dench as M, but I would be absolutely cool with this if it happened. Especially with Timothy Effing Dalton!

Plus, more people would be willing to see Carigs movies as prequels to the other films rather than full on reboots because you could say that Judi Dench played the original M, who was killed and then replaced, and that is the M we see in the original movies, before being replaced again, and then replaced one last time with a woman who looks uncannily like the original M.

 

[Kevin Roegele]

I really like Dench as M, but I would be absolutely cool with this if it happened. Especially with Timothy Effing Dalton!

Plus, more people would be willing to see Carigs movies as prequels to the other films rather than full on reboots because you could say that Judi Dench played the original M, who was killed and then replaced, and that is the M we see in the original movies, before being replaced again, and then replaced one last time with a woman who looks uncannily like the original M.

But that would all be spolied by the guy the same actor playing M and Bond....although some actors have played two different roles in the series before.

 

[Furious Styles]

The cool thing about Dalton as M is he wouldn't take any gruff from Craig.

Dalton: You were supposed to be in Istanbul last night!

Craig: I haven't finished here, sir.

*Dalton clubs Craig. Carries him to airplane*

 

[Speedball]

I don't wanna see M die.
He would make a more interesting Q.

 

[cerealkiller182]

I always liked John Cleese in the role. I thought that was genius casting.

 

[Speedball]

I always liked John Cleese in the role. I thought that was genius casting.

It was, but the way he was used was pathetic. The Q scene in Goldeneye will always be the best one.

 

[Dr.Doom]

Don't forget tonight's supposed premiere of Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Moive for Theatres on adult swim.

its happening

 

[Speedball]

Jackson Flying With Powerpuffs?

TheOneRing.net reported a rumor that Lord of the Rings director Peter Jackson is developing a live-action version of the animated TV series Powerpuff Girls. Citing anonymous sources inside Jackson's company and Weta F/X shop, the site reported that Weta is already at work on props and miniatures based on the Cartoon Network series.

The site added that Jackson was looking toward a summer 2008 release.

Jackson has been reported to be working on a movie based on the best-selling novel The Lovely Bones, which the Web site said has been put on hold.

Powerpuff Girls, about a trio of pint-sized superheroes and their scientist dad, was previously adapted as an animated film in 2002. Powerpuff Girls aired on Cartoon Network from 1998 to 2004.

http://www.scifi.com/scifiwire/index.php?category=1&id=40855&type=0

Funny thing is, SciFi.com believed them. The article on Jackson's site is dated 04/01/07.

 

[PWN3R]

its happening

It was genius. They didn't lie.