Need some help, how do you tell someone...

Zaed

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that they are too overweight without hurting their feelings or making them mad at you?

I have a friend that i grew up with that is still single. Everytime we do stuff together he complains to me that he just cant find a good woman. When we were both younger we were both in pretty good shape. Now that we are in our thirties he's let himself go a little bit and he played the field too much and never settled down with anyone. Now that he's older and overweight he's the one finding it hard to hook up with someone.

He's a really decent guy with a good paying job and a nice car. Even owns his own recently built home. I just feel that if he worked on his physical looks a bit he would have more success in finding a nice lady.

What do you guys think? should i tell him he's fat or not say anything and just be his "shoulder to cry on?"

Oh, Just so you know he's like 5'8" and weighs about 265 or so.
 
Why don't you offer to work out with him? :)
 
squeekness said:
Why don't you offer to work out with him? :)

That would be pretty homoerotic.
 
Iv'e tried that a few times. He's a programmer by occupation so he spends alot of his time sitting in front of the computer so any kind of excercise regiment never lasts long. It's almost like he wont do any excercise unless someone does it with him.
 
If you are both guys, then there should be no problem. Just straight out tell them, "Dood, you're a fat ass. Wanna work some of that ass off? How 'bout you get off the damn thing first. Cock-bite"
 
lock him in a room with no food for 6 weeks and only feed him cereal under the door.
 
JLBats said:
That would be pretty homoerotic.
Tsk. You guys are so lame. Most folks would be happier to work out with someone than by themselves. I just thought it would be a way to offer without directly saying his friend was fat.
 
I wouldn't know.

My experience wasn't good. My "friends" took to calling me "B Cups". My brother called me a fat f**k and told me I'd never amount to anything and never lose weight...I showed him, today I'm 205lbs, with only 8% bodyfat.

Amazing what a little self-loathing will do to motivate you. So technically I owe them for telling me I couldn't do it...cause then I did
 
you're one of those motivated kinda guys, 79
 
if this was a woman I'd say you were crazy for telling them they were overwieght and to make sure you had a helmet of some kind on when you did it. But since it's a guy, just come out and say it. Dont like just blurt it out in a Turrett's Syndrome kind of way, but next time he whines about not getting a girl, point out to him that you think he's a doughy tub of goo, and tell him if he gets his butt in better shape the chicks will be more receptive....
 
I think the only thing you can do is perfectly blunt and honest and take it from there. If he is a real friend, he will honor your opinion and how hard the decision was for you to tell him the truth. After that, he must take it upon himself to either make the proper decision or continue down the same path. I would just tell him I love you like a brother and I don't want to to leave this earth before your time. Your weight is heeding (sp?) you from enjoying the wonders of life and I want to help you, but you have to want to help yourself first. If I were approached in this manner, it would compel me to make changes.
 
The more overweight and sedentary you are the harder it is to get moving. He won't do anything until he's really motivated. I just hope he doesn't get motivated by a heart attack or diabetes 'cause he's headed that way. :(
 
My wife says that i should get him dog like a Lab. I know he likes dogs cause we have two and every time he comes over he's always playing with them.

My wife thinks if we get him a dog he will feel compelled to walk it from time to time and that way he wont have to have a person with him all the time when he exercises.

i dunno though. He seems pretty busy to take care of a dog.:(
 
This is absurd. You can't be 5'8" and weigh 265 pounds and not realize you're a lard-ass.
He KNOWS he's fat. He doesn't need you to tell him.

"Need help. How do you tell a friend the sky is blue without hurting their feelings?"
 
Wilhelm-Scream said:
This is absurd. You can't be 5'8" and weigh 265 pounds and not realize you're a lard-ass.
He KNOWS he's fat. He doesn't need you to tell him.

"Need help. How do you tell a friend the sky is blue without hurting their feelings?"

That's what I was going to say. He already knows it. The dog idea sounds good or sign up at the gym (there's plenty of eye candy at the gym I go to (about half of them go there to socialize), if you offer to go with him he'd be more likely to go.
 
squeekness said:
The more overweight and sedentary you are the harder it is to get moving. He won't do anything until he's really motivated. I just hope he doesn't get motivated by a heart attack or diabetes 'cause he's headed that way. :(
thats wat happened to my dad. he was pretty fat, and he found out he had weight induced diabetes, and the only way to help himself waqs to lose weight, and so far, hes lost 40 lbs, so, its possible
 

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