Moviefan2k4
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Hey, all.
I started writing this maybe a few weeks ago, and thought it'd be cool to get some constructive feedback. So far, all I have is the Kryptonian prologue, but if people like it, I'll keep writing. So, here's the beginning to "Son of Jor-El"; let me know what you think!
* * * * *
EXT. - KRYPTON - DAY
Amidst the vastness of interstellar space, the red sun of Krypton shines like a giant fireball. By comparison, the planet itself, like a blue orb, rotates in a slightly elliptical orbit. We ZOOM towards the surface, its landscape an idyllic utopia of crystalized glass. Towers of untold stature spread across the horizon. In all this alien beauty, a lone voice is suddenly heard. It is the voice of JOR-EL.
ON JOR-EL OF KRYPTON
By Earth standards, Krypton's wisest scientist appears to be about 40 years of age. Tall with an athletic build, his hair is mostly dark, with a slight hint of gray. His eyes are blue as sapphires. In fact, his appearance closely mirrors that of his son as an adult, albeit slightly older. He is clad in robes of red, gold, and blue, his head adorned by a silver headband. On this day, he stands in the grand COUNCIL CHAMBER, addressing the elders with grave concerns.
ON THE COUNCIL CHAMBER
Like the outer landscape itself, the main area of the Kryptonian Council's meeting place somewhat resembles an intricate structure of glass and crystal. It is similar to an auditorium, with chairs surrounding the circular perimeter on five levels. The center of the room features a pedestal, while a section of each wall is devoted to a massive viewscreen. At this moment, Council elders fill the place, muttering amongst themselves, while Jor-El delivers terrible news.
This news causes the massive crowd to quiet somewhat, although whispers can still be heard. One particular elder, VON-DA, stands to pose a reply.
ON VON-DA
Similar in height and build to Jor-El, Von-Da has lighter hair, and piercing brown eyes. His current expression is one of doubt and cynicism. Dressed in robes of gray and black, he exemplifies the arrogance and vanity present in much of the Council.
Standing his ground, Jor-El shoots back, unwilling to yield, yet maintaining his patience.
This retort maddens Von-Da, who rages against Jor-El.
This outburst triggers a loud response from ZEK-UR, a highly respected and feared Council elder.
ON ZEK-UR
Appearing around 50 Earth years in age, Zek-Ur is a powerful diplomat on the Council, with a vast influence over many of his peers. Dressed in similar robes to those of Von-Da, he has gray hair and sports a matching goatee. Standing from his seat, he glares with authority at the disruptive man.
This threat silences a sulking Von-Da. Turning to Jor-El, Zek-Ur simply nods.
Taking a small crystal from his robes, Jor-El aims it at one of the viewscreens. Coming to life, it displays a diagram with planetary orbits and other data.
The video presentation only serves to heighten the commotion slowly growing in the Council chamber. Voices overlap, as various members discuss this news among themselves. Unsure of how to respond, Zek-Ur chooses his words carefully.
This reply causes several elders to rise from their seats, speaking in desperate protest.
These cause another move for silence from Zek-Ur, and another warning for Jor-El.
A moment of stillness passes, as Zek-Ur contemplates his next response.
Bowing respectfully, Jor-El exits the Chamber.
INT. - HOUSE OF EL - DAY
Similar in design to the Council chamber, Kryptonian residences are much smaller in scale, yet still impressive by our methods. The House of El is no exception, and across the main hall, working diligently, is the wife of Jor-El, Lara Lor-Van.
ON LARA LOR-VAN
Somewhat tall and very radiant, Lara is widely known on Krypton for her amazing beauty, considerable genius, and kind spirit. Unlike her husband, who is noble yet seems rather cold at times, Lara is an example of love and compassion above all else. She appears to be around 36 years of age, with shoulder-length red hair and eyes of jade or emerald. Hearing the main entrance open, she turns to greet Jor-El...and his expression confirms her worst fears.
Tears form in Lara's eyes, as she sorrowfully embraces her husband.
Not knowing what else to say, Jor-El simply holds his wife close, her sobs echoing across their home. His own expression is one of anger at the Council, but determination to save the last of his race. Pulling back from this tragic scene, we FADE TO BLACK for a moment, and then open to...
INT. - COUNCIL CHAMBER - DAY
Standing before the elders, Jor-El's hopes are dashed by their ruling, which is read aloud by Zek-Ur.
Finishing the ruling, Zek-Ur poses one final question on the matter.
Angry yet composed, the wise scientist speaks calmly as possible, given his emotional state.
Thinking quietly for a brief moment, Jor-El sighs, then speaks.
Again bowing, Jor-El exits. Walking home, he looks out a window, as the red sun of Krypton casts a crimson glow on the cities.
INT. - JOR-EL'S LABORATORY - DAY
It's now mere hours from destruction, and Jor-El works feverishly on the finishing touches to his small, experimental spacecraft. Entering the workspace, Lara appears worried; not so much for herself, but for her son. Jor-El, usually calm and focused, now looks passionately determined in his quest to save Kal-El.
Turning briefly from his work, Jor-El looks at his wife. She's practically about to fall apart, her courage melting away. Rushing to her side, he holds her again, trying his best not to show his own fears.
Barely able to contain her tears, Lara speaks, shuddering.
Suddenly, a great, massive earthquake shakes the lab. Looking out a window, Jor-El watches in horror as citizens flee, giant cracks opening in the landscape. Towers collapse, and people are swallowed into the chasms, their fates forever sealed. Terrified screams and pleas echo all over, as many meet their deaths. Realizing the moment is near, Jor-El makes the final adjustments, then turns back to his wife.
Nodding, Lara leaves briefly, returning with the infant boy, who is wrapped in a blanket similar to his father's Council robes. Tearfully placing him in the ship, a weeping Lara kisses her son's forehead one final time, and whispers an agonizing good-bye. The top of the ship closes, and Jor-El activates it by inserting a strange, transparent crystal. It is pentagon shaped, with Kryptonian glyphs etched into it. Coming to life, the craft hovers briefly, shining brilliantly. Then, it crashes through the lab's wall, rocketing away from the perilous, dying planet. Watching their son's departure, Lara and Jor-El grip each other in fear, tears streaming down their faces.
EXT. - SPACE
As was warned, Krypton collides with its red sun, and both are encompassed by a devastating explosion. The small craft rockets towards us, like a bat out of hell.
I started writing this maybe a few weeks ago, and thought it'd be cool to get some constructive feedback. So far, all I have is the Kryptonian prologue, but if people like it, I'll keep writing. So, here's the beginning to "Son of Jor-El"; let me know what you think!
* * * * *
EXT. - KRYPTON - DAY
Amidst the vastness of interstellar space, the red sun of Krypton shines like a giant fireball. By comparison, the planet itself, like a blue orb, rotates in a slightly elliptical orbit. We ZOOM towards the surface, its landscape an idyllic utopia of crystalized glass. Towers of untold stature spread across the horizon. In all this alien beauty, a lone voice is suddenly heard. It is the voice of JOR-EL.
ON JOR-EL OF KRYPTON
By Earth standards, Krypton's wisest scientist appears to be about 40 years of age. Tall with an athletic build, his hair is mostly dark, with a slight hint of gray. His eyes are blue as sapphires. In fact, his appearance closely mirrors that of his son as an adult, albeit slightly older. He is clad in robes of red, gold, and blue, his head adorned by a silver headband. On this day, he stands in the grand COUNCIL CHAMBER, addressing the elders with grave concerns.
ON THE COUNCIL CHAMBER
Like the outer landscape itself, the main area of the Kryptonian Council's meeting place somewhat resembles an intricate structure of glass and crystal. It is similar to an auditorium, with chairs surrounding the circular perimeter on five levels. The center of the room features a pedestal, while a section of each wall is devoted to a massive viewscreen. At this moment, Council elders fill the place, muttering amongst themselves, while Jor-El delivers terrible news.
JOR-EL
"Honorable elders of Krypton, I come before you today with dire revelations. The future of our world is in severe jeopardy."
"Honorable elders of Krypton, I come before you today with dire revelations. The future of our world is in severe jeopardy."
This news causes the massive crowd to quiet somewhat, although whispers can still be heard. One particular elder, VON-DA, stands to pose a reply.
ON VON-DA
Similar in height and build to Jor-El, Von-Da has lighter hair, and piercing brown eyes. His current expression is one of doubt and cynicism. Dressed in robes of gray and black, he exemplifies the arrogance and vanity present in much of the Council.
VON-DA
"And how, might I ask, did you arrive at this conclusion? Krypton has been the crowned jewel of this system for millennia. Your insinuations are ridiculous."
"And how, might I ask, did you arrive at this conclusion? Krypton has been the crowned jewel of this system for millennia. Your insinuations are ridiculous."
Standing his ground, Jor-El shoots back, unwilling to yield, yet maintaining his patience.
JOR-EL
"You know as well as I do, Von-Da, that a true Kryptonian listens before he speaks."
"You know as well as I do, Von-Da, that a true Kryptonian listens before he speaks."
This retort maddens Von-Da, who rages against Jor-El.
VON-DA
"The House of El are nothing but cowards, ready to flee at a moment's notice!"
"The House of El are nothing but cowards, ready to flee at a moment's notice!"
This outburst triggers a loud response from ZEK-UR, a highly respected and feared Council elder.
ON ZEK-UR
Appearing around 50 Earth years in age, Zek-Ur is a powerful diplomat on the Council, with a vast influence over many of his peers. Dressed in similar robes to those of Von-Da, he has gray hair and sports a matching goatee. Standing from his seat, he glares with authority at the disruptive man.
ZEK-UR
"Enough!!! Either silence your atrocities, or lose your position here!"
"Enough!!! Either silence your atrocities, or lose your position here!"
This threat silences a sulking Von-Da. Turning to Jor-El, Zek-Ur simply nods.
ZEK-UR
"Continue your presentation, Jor-El. But be warned, this Council does not respond well to hysteria."
"Continue your presentation, Jor-El. But be warned, this Council does not respond well to hysteria."
JOR-EL
"My intention is not to cause a panic, sir...but I will not apologize for speaking the truth."
"My intention is not to cause a panic, sir...but I will not apologize for speaking the truth."
Taking a small crystal from his robes, Jor-El aims it at one of the viewscreens. Coming to life, it displays a diagram with planetary orbits and other data.
JOR-EL
"Our planet's core has solidified, changing our orbit over time. When Krypton's current orbit reaches this point - five rotations from now - we and our red sun will collide, triggering a massive explosion. No one would survive."
"Our planet's core has solidified, changing our orbit over time. When Krypton's current orbit reaches this point - five rotations from now - we and our red sun will collide, triggering a massive explosion. No one would survive."
The video presentation only serves to heighten the commotion slowly growing in the Council chamber. Voices overlap, as various members discuss this news among themselves. Unsure of how to respond, Zek-Ur chooses his words carefully.
ZEK-UR
"What are you suggesting?"
"What are you suggesting?"
JOR-EL
"We have only one choice, sir. We must leave Krypton. If we do not, we are doomed."
"We have only one choice, sir. We must leave Krypton. If we do not, we are doomed."
This reply causes several elders to rise from their seats, speaking in desperate protest.
ELDER #1
"This is all most of us have ever known!"
"This is all most of us have ever known!"
ELDER #2
"Where would we go? The nearest stable planets are light-years away!"
"Where would we go? The nearest stable planets are light-years away!"
ELDER #3
"And most of them are centuries behind us; how would we even survive?"
"And most of them are centuries behind us; how would we even survive?"
These cause another move for silence from Zek-Ur, and another warning for Jor-El.
ZEK-UR
"I've heard enough, Jor-El. If you knew all this, why did you wait to reveal it? Your new invention was supposed to protect us."
"I've heard enough, Jor-El. If you knew all this, why did you wait to reveal it? Your new invention was supposed to protect us."
JOR-EL
"The interactive intelligence I created was designed to better our internal defenses, not confront outside threats. I didn't discover our fate until recently, and I wanted to prove it before addressing you all today. I've finalized all the data; it's a scientific certainty. Krypton will be destroyed, but we have a chance to survive. We simply must take it."
"The interactive intelligence I created was designed to better our internal defenses, not confront outside threats. I didn't discover our fate until recently, and I wanted to prove it before addressing you all today. I've finalized all the data; it's a scientific certainty. Krypton will be destroyed, but we have a chance to survive. We simply must take it."
A moment of stillness passes, as Zek-Ur contemplates his next response.
ZEK-UR
"The Council will evaluate your data, and make our ruling tomorrow. As a participant here, you are under oath not to reveal anything you know until then. Dismissed."
"The Council will evaluate your data, and make our ruling tomorrow. As a participant here, you are under oath not to reveal anything you know until then. Dismissed."
Bowing respectfully, Jor-El exits the Chamber.
INT. - HOUSE OF EL - DAY
Similar in design to the Council chamber, Kryptonian residences are much smaller in scale, yet still impressive by our methods. The House of El is no exception, and across the main hall, working diligently, is the wife of Jor-El, Lara Lor-Van.
ON LARA LOR-VAN
Somewhat tall and very radiant, Lara is widely known on Krypton for her amazing beauty, considerable genius, and kind spirit. Unlike her husband, who is noble yet seems rather cold at times, Lara is an example of love and compassion above all else. She appears to be around 36 years of age, with shoulder-length red hair and eyes of jade or emerald. Hearing the main entrance open, she turns to greet Jor-El...and his expression confirms her worst fears.
JOR-EL
"Begin final preparations, Lara."
"Begin final preparations, Lara."
LARA
"Those fools; don't they realize what's happening?"
"Those fools; don't they realize what's happening?"
JOR-EL
"Vanity and greed have blinded them. I'm forbidden to mention anything until their official statement tomorrow...but I know what it will be."
"Vanity and greed have blinded them. I'm forbidden to mention anything until their official statement tomorrow...but I know what it will be."
Tears form in Lara's eyes, as she sorrowfully embraces her husband.
LARA
"Our son will never know us, Jor-El; we'll be nothing to him...I'll lose my son."
"Our son will never know us, Jor-El; we'll be nothing to him...I'll lose my son."
Not knowing what else to say, Jor-El simply holds his wife close, her sobs echoing across their home. His own expression is one of anger at the Council, but determination to save the last of his race. Pulling back from this tragic scene, we FADE TO BLACK for a moment, and then open to...
INT. - COUNCIL CHAMBER - DAY
Standing before the elders, Jor-El's hopes are dashed by their ruling, which is read aloud by Zek-Ur.
ZEK-UR
"We, the Honorable Elders of the Council of Krypton, hereby reach the following decision: the conclusions of Jor-El, scientist and elder, though founded on credible data, are in themselves intolerable, created for the sole purpose of dividing our society through fear. At this time, we see no other option but to demand that his rebellious ways be forever silenced."
"We, the Honorable Elders of the Council of Krypton, hereby reach the following decision: the conclusions of Jor-El, scientist and elder, though founded on credible data, are in themselves intolerable, created for the sole purpose of dividing our society through fear. At this time, we see no other option but to demand that his rebellious ways be forever silenced."
Finishing the ruling, Zek-Ur poses one final question on the matter.
ZEK-UR
"Have you anything to say, Jor-El?"
"Have you anything to say, Jor-El?"
Angry yet composed, the wise scientist speaks calmly as possible, given his emotional state.
JOR-EL
"Only this, your honors: that I will not cease my efforts to save our world. It is not my conclusions, but your ruling which is fueled by fear and contempt. You all know me to be a just and decent man, and I would never alarm anyone without due cause."
"Only this, your honors: that I will not cease my efforts to save our world. It is not my conclusions, but your ruling which is fueled by fear and contempt. You all know me to be a just and decent man, and I would never alarm anyone without due cause."
VON-DA
"Should you choose to incite a riot or create a panic, you will be condemned as a terrorist, eternally imprisoned in the Phantom Zone. We offer you one final chance to abide by our decision. What is your choice?"
"Should you choose to incite a riot or create a panic, you will be condemned as a terrorist, eternally imprisoned in the Phantom Zone. We offer you one final chance to abide by our decision. What is your choice?"
Thinking quietly for a brief moment, Jor-El sighs, then speaks.
JOR-EL
"Neither my wife nor I will leave, or speak of the dangers to come. But it is my hope that some of you will choose to avoid death...before it becomes too late."
"Neither my wife nor I will leave, or speak of the dangers to come. But it is my hope that some of you will choose to avoid death...before it becomes too late."
Again bowing, Jor-El exits. Walking home, he looks out a window, as the red sun of Krypton casts a crimson glow on the cities.
JOR-EL
"So be it."
"So be it."
INT. - JOR-EL'S LABORATORY - DAY
It's now mere hours from destruction, and Jor-El works feverishly on the finishing touches to his small, experimental spacecraft. Entering the workspace, Lara appears worried; not so much for herself, but for her son. Jor-El, usually calm and focused, now looks passionately determined in his quest to save Kal-El.
LARA
"Is it ready?"
"Is it ready?"
JOR-EL
"Nearly. Is he alright?"
"Nearly. Is he alright?"
LARA
"He's sleeping. I only wish..."
"He's sleeping. I only wish..."
Turning briefly from his work, Jor-El looks at his wife. She's practically about to fall apart, her courage melting away. Rushing to her side, he holds her again, trying his best not to show his own fears.
JOR-EL
"There's no other choice, my dear. If he remains with us, he will die. Sending him away is his only chance for life."
"There's no other choice, my dear. If he remains with us, he will die. Sending him away is his only chance for life."
Barely able to contain her tears, Lara speaks, shuddering.
LARA
"I...I know. I just...love him...so much."
"I...I know. I just...love him...so much."
JOR-EL
"As do I, Lara."
"As do I, Lara."
Suddenly, a great, massive earthquake shakes the lab. Looking out a window, Jor-El watches in horror as citizens flee, giant cracks opening in the landscape. Towers collapse, and people are swallowed into the chasms, their fates forever sealed. Terrified screams and pleas echo all over, as many meet their deaths. Realizing the moment is near, Jor-El makes the final adjustments, then turns back to his wife.
JOR-EL
"Bring him; it is time."
"Bring him; it is time."
Nodding, Lara leaves briefly, returning with the infant boy, who is wrapped in a blanket similar to his father's Council robes. Tearfully placing him in the ship, a weeping Lara kisses her son's forehead one final time, and whispers an agonizing good-bye. The top of the ship closes, and Jor-El activates it by inserting a strange, transparent crystal. It is pentagon shaped, with Kryptonian glyphs etched into it. Coming to life, the craft hovers briefly, shining brilliantly. Then, it crashes through the lab's wall, rocketing away from the perilous, dying planet. Watching their son's departure, Lara and Jor-El grip each other in fear, tears streaming down their faces.
JOR-EL
"Farewell...my son."
"Farewell...my son."
EXT. - SPACE
As was warned, Krypton collides with its red sun, and both are encompassed by a devastating explosion. The small craft rockets towards us, like a bat out of hell.
