That person who has to argue about EVERYTHING you say.

[THE MR. TERRIFIC]

You are nice. That chick was crazy Bro! LOL!

 

[bullets]

Haha my brother was a couch rider for a couple years.


I dated this girl last year that wanted to have the opposite opinion on everything. She convinced me I was the one starting arguments, so i stuck it out and held back trying to be nice as possible. It turned out me being nice led to her taking advantage of the situation. Eventually we were heading back from a movie and she goaded me into an argument. I told her I couldn't take it and asked her to drop me off. She said , " we just need to talk ". I told her , " that's the last thing we need". I never talked to her again after that. It's not worth the stress or the headache to have someone in your life like that.

 

[ChickenScratch]

You are correct man. I hate being baited into arguments. But people always marvel at my ability to stay calm and relaxed. Maybe it's my 25 years of Karate steeped in Zen Buddhism, maybe it's because of my family's Hindu beliefs, but I doubt it since I am an Objectivist.

You just gotta know where your center is and always start from there. No matter what the other person says or does, it's their action, not yours, you don't have to react in kind.

Riding couches is fun, you get to meet a lot of people and get to know your friends a lot better. Not something I would recommend anyone do for any long period of time though.

 

[Rocketman]

These replies are making me feel a lot better. Thanks everyone! Seriously!

 

[Rocketman]

Firstly, thanks for your rant. As much as you might hate this, it make me laugh out loud

It gave me the need to rant myself, so here goes.

My pet hates in arguements and my attempts at solutions:

1. People who argue with anyone who challenges something they have just made up, even though it's a complete lie.

I know quite a few compulsive liars.

Trouble is, a lot of them, if you tell them they are wrong, will argue until they are blue in the face that you're wrong.

Solution: I have found there is only one way for me to keep my cool with them. I google it.

As long as I KNOW I am right, I can breathe a sigh and just keep my mouth shut and laugh about it with my friends later.

I don't know why that works, but it just does

2. People who start arguements with me in front of other people, and then when I am winning, get them involved.

It is impossible to win an arguement if the whole room is against you. Because what happens is that YOU become the arguementative one to all of them... regardless of who started it, or how important the issue is to you, if your the only one who disagrees with everyone else, your the one causing the problem.

I have this problem all the time at work.

SOLUTION: Do not get sucked into arguements unless you know that there is no one the other person can use as 'back up' around.

3. People who back track on their own arguement and deny saying the very thing that started it all!

It's the times you wished you had a dictophone on record at all times.

A move like this is almost always followed by my flabbergasted loud question 'Well then what the hell are we argueing about, if that's not what you said?'... person's response = 'You tell me. You tell me,' in a patronising tone.

SOLUTION: Carry a dictophone with you at all times

4. People who start an arguement, and then walk off

My mother does this. She will literally come in and scream at me for something, then leave the room and if I follow in order to say something in my defense, will hold her hand up and say 'I don't want to argue about it anymore!'

I don't get a turn?

NOOOOOOOOOO!

Every single person on this earth, when confronted with an accusation or an assertion they disagree with, should have the right to REPLY to it.

That is just basic civility, respect and equality.

It really, really, really makes me angry

SOLUTION: ????? If anyone has one, i'm all ears!

Now - On to your problem

There are only going to be a few ways to get out of this one, if the girl is as arguementative as you say.

Option 1: Anything you can prove, prove.

Don't waste your breathe telling her. She can argue with anything that comes out of your mouth, but she can't argue with facts. As I said before. Google it, the internet is wonderful and full of things that will shut people up.

For instance, here is a quote from wikipedia on the subject of nerds:

The stereotypical nerd is intelligent but socially and physically awkward.In film and television depictions, nerds are disproportionately white male with very large glasses, braces, severe acne and pants highly lifted up.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nerd

I think that sufficiently proves your point.

If that's not enough, google the phrase 'Nerd Sterotype' on image search. I just did. The first four images where of guys with glasses and goofy teeth.

Downside - It won't work for opinions really. Plus, there is always the danger of counter proof if she's really good.

Option 2: Try to organise your own 'back up' crew.

Invite your friends round. Slip the 'debate' you and your housemate where having into conversation when she is in the room. Ask your friends what they think (obviously make sure they agree with you first ).

Let's see if she has the guts to argue with the whole room.

Downside - She might. And she might hold the ambush against you.

Option 3: Simply do not engage in conversation.

I'm not saying ignore her completely. Ask her about her day and stuff. But do not under any circumstance talk about an opinion, something you learned about, something you know about... anything that could be contested.

Downside - She will eventually start an arguement with you about why you've been so off with her.

Option 4: Wholeheartedly agree with everything she says.

This is a very difficult card to play, and is usually a last ditch effort for me. For one thing, it's hard to do it without looking sarcastic, especially if you really really disagree.

Downside - If she's a really bad arguer, she'll probably disagree with your agreement.

For example: You - The sky is blue. Her - No it's not. You - No, it's not your right, it's not blue. Her - Don't be silly, it's blue, I just meant that it's not JUST blue.

Or something to that effect...

Anyway man, Good Luck defeating the beast.

But there is really only one solution.

Get out of it's mouth!!!!!

You... Freaking... ROCK!!

Thanks so much for the response. I'm definitely going to print this out and keep it in my wallet, lol. The next time she does it, I'm just gonna whip my wallet out and say, "One moment, please." lol.

I seriously don't know what else to do. I'm on my last thread here. These are desperate times. I'm seriously fragile, and close to snapping. I fear more for her than myself.

Really, excellent stuff here. Thank you.

Secondly, I have to keep in mind that I'm living with her, so I can't snap. That would make the next year awfully awkward.

 

[chaseter]

Oh, so this is the chaseter thread?

It's just an ok thread.

 

[chaseter]

You should bang her.

I thought this thread was about me.

 

[Spider-Nerd]

I spent 3 years in law school where everyone was like this. I either ignored them or threatened to smash them over the head with a barbell if they didn't shut up.

 

[TinkTonks]

I work with someone like that....we had an office meeting last month, then one of our employees went on vacation right after the meeting. When she came back, I said something like 'wow, it seems like it's been 3 weeks since I saw you last!' Well, the other employee pokes her nose in, and pipes up with 'well, actually, our office meeting was 2 weeks and 3 days ago, so *at most* it would be 2 weeks and 3 days since you saw her last. I felt like going and printing off the definition of "seems" in giant print, handing it to her and just walking away. But she does stuff like that all the time. Her war-cry is "I know." Or, "you know you" as in, 'you know you' are confused and mixed up and I have all the answers to everything you could ever want to know, 'you know you' were wrong.......ugh!!!

 

[WildcatNC]

You should bang her.

First thing I thought. Sounds like pent up tension to me. She just needs an outlet. **** her down till she can't stand up and she'll stop the bull****.

 

[Leenie]

*sigh* My brother is like this. I love him to death, but it's annoying.

 

[Wolf Boy]

My best friends brother is like this. He's really ****ing annoying.

 

[Secret Fawful]

*sigh* My brother is like this. I love him to death, but it's annoying.

My best friends brother is like this. He's really ****ing annoying.

Bang them. Or does that not apply here?

Do it anyway.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

You... Freaking... ROCK!!

Thanks so much for the response. I'm definitely going to print this out and keep it in my wallet, lol. The next time she does it, I'm just gonna whip my wallet out and say, "One moment, please." lol.

I seriously don't know what else to do. I'm on my last thread here. These are desperate times. I'm seriously fragile, and close to snapping. I fear more for her than myself.

Really, excellent stuff here. Thank you.

Secondly, I have to keep in mind that I'm living with her, so I can't snap. That would make the next year awfully awkward.

t:

That's okay.

Argueing is kind of my speciality. Thinking about making a career out if it... but I have no idea how to do that

Seriously tho, whatever you have to do to keep sane do it. Living with people is really hard, especially when they are that difficult.

I'm 24 now, and i've lived in so many different crazy situations since leaving home. I lived with a guy who was actually insane. He screamed at me once because one of his glasses had moved and he had been keeping a pet spider in there that he was planning on naming... I kid you not.

I've lived with girls that liked to pole dance and have loud sex, a guy who was secretly doing heroin, another guy who had no job and used to have loud parties all night with drugs and people coming in and out of the house... and it was small flat, I couldn't sleep for months... I literally went crazy and had a breakdown where I just started pacing back and forth for half hour saying 'I've got to get out of here!'. I've had kitchens that I simply stopped using because I got sick of cleaning, I've been a lodger in a 50 year old mans house for a week before he tried to kiss me when drunk and I had to lock myself in my room and then swiftly move out. And the past year i've been living with a lesbian couple who have a 7 yr old and a 9yr old boy, 2 dogs, 4 cats and a goldfish... and they are obsessed with the house being haunted!

In two weeks, I am moving into my own bedsit. First time i've been able to afford a place of my own (i'm working two jobs to pay for it), but it is going to be soooooo worth it!

Anyway that got a bit off topic, the point is, it is actually really really bad to be stuck in a horrible living situation, and I feel for you man!

Oh and I wanted to add, that if none of my previous suggestions work, just start getting really really juvenille.

Like repeat everything she says, or do the 'did you just hear something?' ignoring game. It won't make her less angry, but it'll make you impossible to be argued with.

And it'll be FUN!

P.S. Tell me how the next arguement goes

 

[Rocketman]

hopefulsuicide,

Maybe in 10 years, if we're still living with crazy ***holes, we can just move in together. We can have quiet, conservative, SHH parties once a month. t:

 

[hopefuldreamer]

hopefulsuicide,

Maybe in 10 years, if we're still living with crazy ***holes, we can just move in together. We can have quiet, conservative, SHH parties once a month. t:

I'm sure I can be a pain in the ass myself... I mean, I am a woman

And as you can see, you'd never win an arguement with me

 

[Rocketman]

I'm sure I can be a pain in the ass myself... I mean, I am a woman

And as you can see, you'd never win an arguement with me

Honestly, I can automatically tell you're better than my current situation, lol.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

Honestly, I can automatically tell you're better than my current situation, lol.

LOL well i'd hope so, cause your current situation sounds like a psycho *****

 

[Lunar_Wolf]

I'd piledrive her!

 

[Casius--J]

Oh man you just explained a girl that came over to visit me in spain a few weeks ago. It came to a point where I had to ignore her because at least 90% of what came out of her mouth was negative. Oh it smells here, the girls aren't very pretty here blah blah blah.

Also I noticed that this girl just seemed to want to argue and get this "Win", seriously?? You won an argument and this enhances your life somehow??

In any case it was a good reminder of why I left the UK and why I hadn't spent much time with her when I was living there.

 

[DBryan]

I've noticed a pattern in this thread, and the pattern is the same in my life also.

To me personally I've only experienced this exclusivly from women.

 

[JJJ's Ulcer]

=Me, too often.

 

[JJJ's Ulcer]

Only one person in my life loves to argue and is a confessed contrarian. And he's British, so it pretty much runs in their blood. It's so bad, that if you say "that's a nice shirt you're wearing", he'll look down and say "actually, I'm not too keen on it." Besides that, he's a good friend, but that crap gets annoying.

 

[Godzilla2000]

I have this issue an awful lot where I work which is a 24 hour laundromat. People find the weirdest things to bicker about with me and belittle me. Here's but a few incidences I have had:

1.) A woman flipped out on me because I told her calling me miss was fine. She's basically your standard drunken, black hair dyed, tattooed, Caucasian woman trying to act like a tough Hispanic woman.

2.) A couple of Nurse Jackies are doing laundry when I'm working. Mind you I'm minding my own business, listening to Within Temptation and Nightwish writing my silly little Thor Movie Universe fanfiction and one of them comes up and demands I turn off my music then starts telling me I should be working. To which I tell her I'm waiting for them to leave to clean up after them. I also tell them I hate Rap/Hip Hop but I don't tell people to turn their music off when they're there. I just lock the door and wait until they leave. It was nice though when I got a call from some guys doing their laundry telling me those girls were out of hand and they'd leave my boss a message to that effect.

 

[Rocketman]

I have this issue an awful lot where I work which is a 24 hour laundromat. People find the weirdest things to bicker about with me and belittle me. Here's but a few incidences I have had:

1.) A woman flipped out on me because I told her calling me miss was fine. She's basically your standard drunken, black hair dyed, tattooed, Caucasian woman trying to act like a tough Hispanic woman.

2.) A couple of Nurse Jackies are doing laundry when I'm working. Mind you I'm minding my own business, listening to Within Temptation and Nightwish writing my silly little Thor Movie Universe fanfiction and one of them comes up and demands I turn off my music then starts telling me I should be working. To which I tell her I'm waiting for them to leave to clean up after them. I also tell them I hate Rap/Hip Hop but I don't tell people to turn their music off when they're there. I just lock the door and wait until they leave. It was nice though when I got a call from some guys doing their laundry telling me those girls were out of hand and they'd leave my boss a message to that effect.

Sounds like a depressing job.