The Crannox *Story version*

Okay, this is the story version of my unsuccesful animated film about a sea monster. The story has been altered slightly. But anyway, here's chapter 1. Please, please, please post your comments and crits!

The Crannox​

A short story by Climperoonie​

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The Atlantic ocean. The world’s second largest oceanic division. The sea bed of this vast plain of water is mostly flat. There are a few underwater mountain ranges. And then there is the trenches. Some trenches fairly shallow, others deep. But they are all perfectly hospitable for a creature that remains undiscovered. And it was probably best left that way. But man doesn’t like Earth keeping secrets. Even if they are deadly….
Chapter I – The Sub
Barry Jones sat in his office chewing his pencil. He was on an old Oil Rig that was 350 miles of the coast of New York. The Rig had been converted, however, into a research laboratory for TOED, or The Ocean Exploration Division. It was this Rig that was harbouring the latest TOED project – A submarine built out of a recently discovered metal that is capable of diving to depths of 6’500 meters. And Barry, along with comrades John and Steve, were the group who were to pilot it. All of a sudden, Barry’s communication equipment buzzed.
“This is Jones.” He said.
“Barry, it’s me, John, the sub’s ready to go.” John replied.
“Okay, I’ll be down in a few minutes. Out.” Barry pressed the red button on the transceiver, then jumped to his feet and walked to the door. He left his office and jogged to the lift, which he entered. On the lift controls, he pressed the button BSL7, and the lift whirred into life. Two minutes later, and Barry was in Hangar 7, where the sub sat in all it’s glory.
“Barry! You’re here!” Barry turned to see the leader of the operation, Ivan Shuckford.
“Sir.” Barry nodded to him.
“Right, I need you over there with John and Steve.” Barry pointed to his team-mates. Barry nodded again and walked over to them. Ivan followed to give them there briefing.
“Okay, team, you are about to make history. You just need to get past the 6’000 mark, then you can get the hell out of there. And fast. This is only a test. And finally, never, ever, for any reason, leave the sub. Just because the sub is implosion-proof, doesn’t mean you are too. And good luck.” Ivan said. The group nodded and walked to the sub. They walked up the stairs, which then closed up behind them as the door. They all sat at their positions, and then they heard the countdown. Finally, after ten seconds of almost unbearable tension, they were off. A track took them through to the airlock, and the door behind them closed. Then, the final door ahead opened. The room the sub was currently in filled with water, and the electromagnetic grips holding the sub to the track released. They were out of the lab. And on their own.