SUPERMAN: So they're making a Justice League movie? BATMAN: Trying... SUPERMAN: It'll never get off the ground. BATMAN: Like your movie. JOY: Oh snap!
SUPERMAN: I hope they use solo films to introduce the lesser known members of the league. BATMAN: Yeah, the general public doesn't really know everyone else besides us. WONDER WOMAN: Yeah the general public really knows us. BATMAN: Yep, they really know you, Diana.
PRE-GREEN LANTERN: HAL: Hey guys I heard I'm getting a movie. WALLY: That's awesome! DIANA: Great job, Hal! POST-GREEN LANTERN: HAL: Hey guys it's me Hal! DIANA & WALLY: Who?
SUPERMAN: "We Shall Be The Fellowship Of The Ring!" FLASH: "Great! Where are we going?" HAL: "Okay look I know my film had its faults but it still wasn't anywhere near as bad those Michael Bay Transformer films!" WALLY: "Hey at least you got a movie! And you still get to exist in the comics!" DIANA: "Hey, I'd kill to have my own movie! I can't even get a TV show off the ground in this day and age! Cult characters like Hellboy get two movies while I have to settle for popping up in animation from time to time! How do you think that makes me feel?!" SUPERMAN: "You can have a reference in my upcoming film... if you sell me your marriage." WALL-FLASH: "Do I look like Spider-Man to you?!"
REPORTER: This is Asian Reporter Tricia Takanawa here, reporting at the "Save the Oceans" rally led by famously harrassed superhero Aquaman. Recently, Aquaman gave a heroic speech about how dynamite wielding fisherman are destroying coral reefs and causing harm to the environment. AQUAMAN: ... Thank you. Now is there any questions. TRICIA: Aquaman! Is it true that your mother abandoned you on a coral reef when you were a baby?!? AQUAMAN: Wait... wha-- TRICIA: Is it also true that your step brother was neglected as a child vanished only to return with amnesia as the supervillain Ocean Master?!? AQUAMAN: Well, that's fam-- TRICIA: And is it also true that you are currently working for whaling companies by using your telepathic abilities to lure unsuspecting whales to their doom? AQUAMAN: Okay, I have a question for you. Where are you getting this information? REPORTER: Hey she's asking the questions here! CLARK: Uh, I mean uh... Up, up and away!
That's funny Loca! Off subject a little... I just hope Martian Manhunter doesn't end up like Beast or Gambit in the X-Men movies in that both characters were considered from the get go for each movie until finally showing up in somewhat disappointing roles.
DINAH: Why can't I be a founding member in the Justice League? SUPERMAN: It's sort of a guys only title. DINAH: But Diana-- BATMAN: Have you actually met Diana?
DINAH: So you trying to get with Bruce again? DIANA: Yeah, is Ollie taking you out? DINAH: Yep. DIANA: Hey, do you think we're promoting a negative image for women if we are just chasing after and dating hunky, playboy billionaires? DINAH: No, that's silly. Unless you think our sex appeal, form fitting outfits and physiques are promoting unhealthy body image goal which young girls will try to acquire through dangerous means. DIANA: Nah, I doubt that.
DIANA: "So... we'll keep this just between us, right?" DINAH: "Right." [thinking] "I am SOOOOOOOOOO gonna blackmail her with this..."
HAYLEY: I am Wonder Woman! GEMMA: I am Wonder Woman! LYNN: I am Wonder Woman! BRIDGET: I am Wonder Woman! CHRISTINA: I am Wonder Woman! VOICE: NO! MICHAEL: I AM WONDER WOMAN!
Hehehehehehe And thanks. All this other stuff's funny, but I can't think of a good gag at the moment.
Thanks guys! SUPERMAN: So you and Diana... BATMAN: Clark it was a one time thing, we were drunk, it was after we defeated Savage. it didn't mean anything... SUPERMAN: Don't lie to me Bruce, if you want us to end just say it! Just say it! *flies off* WONDER WOMAN: Are you sure he's going to be okay... BATMAN: He'll come around...
DIANA: Hey Dinah, I have this strange mark on my back and I was wondering maybe you would like to take a look at it. DINAH: Sure Diana, what are friends for. *Diana removes towel* DINAH: Oh is that it. DIANA: No it's a birthmark. DINAH: Well, I don't see what you're talking about-- Hey is that a new bra? DIANA: Yeah, it's silk. It's very soft. You wanna feel? Oh I also got matching underwear... DINAH: You call that itty-bitty thing underwear? *Both gasp* DINAH: PEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRVVVVV!!! SUPERMAN: Heh, betcha wish you had x-ray vision then. BATMAN: Shut it.
OLLIE: Alright so let's get down to business. DINAH: Oh please, y'know I'm just a tease during holidays and weekends. OLLIE: But it's my birthday. DINAH: Which I count as a holiday.
ANNOUNCER: Welcome back to Superhero Idol! Now your host the guy who ISN'T Ryan Seacrest! BRIAN: That's Brian Dunkleman! Anyway, I begrudginly, welcome you back to Superhero Idol where our contestants will be competing for a spot in the Justice League movie. Now here's our contestants! MARTIAN MANHUNTER! CYBORG! BLACK CANARY! GREEN ARROW! AND AQUAMAN! AQUAMAN: Wait! I thought I already was in the film. BRIAN: Sorry, due to your hate by the GA you will have to prove yourself marketable again! AQUAMAN: Da fu-- BRIAN: Previously, our pristine judges watched as our contestants duked it out by performing tricks with their special abilities all the while singing a song from our prestigous music catalogue. J'onn performed an uplifting duet with himself of 'Ebony & Ivory'. Here's what the judges had to say: DIANA: Honey, you look darling tonight. I love what you're wearing. But I felt this performance wasn't your color. You have to find that special crayon in the box and embrace it. And make that dazzling rainbow that is your performance. CLARK: It was a little pitchy, but you did your thang, dawg! BRUCE: That was utterly pathetic, you form a second head and yet you cannot even harmonize. And look how fat you look, doesn't he look fat! You're just pathetic. BRIAN: I can't believe I gave up AI for this... DINAH: I can't believe these idiots are in this film...
WB: Go my Dark Knight. Find the percise specimens to destroy our enemies. BATMAN: Azzz yoooouuu wisssshhhh my masssstttterrrrrr. WB: Do not fail me. Your old master tried to take you away from me, but the force was in our favor. BATMAN: Yeeeesss mmmmy ooooold mmmmasteeeerrr...
DINAH: For the last time we are not Black Widow and Hawkeye! ' OLLIE: Yeah those guys wish they were as cool as us.
Funny stuff guys. Oh the irony... AQUAMAN: "No matter what happens, the ring must go to Mordor." WONDER WOMAN: "You have my sword." GREEN ARROW: "And you have my bow." SUPERMAN: "And my axe." SUPERMAN: "Excuse me, but would you hit me again? I've never seen such fluidity, the way your knuckles crunch when you smashed them into my face. It's poetry in motion." WONDER WOMAN: "Dance with me. I'll hit you all you like."
WB: The ring must be destroyed in the fires of Mt. Doom. HAL: Hey! That's my ring! Are you guys trying to get rid of me? BRUCE: Nooozzz. Of cooouuurrrrse noooot. CLARK: Yeah Hal, that movie flop has you paranoid.