Witless Protection and the things I would rather do than see it...

Well, this movie just looks God awful. I mean, I am personally shocked that any studio would greenlight anything with Larry the Cable Guy. I mean, he just aint funny. In fact, it offends me how not funny this guy is. So in honor of this terrible, terrible event in human history, I give to you, my friends, the list of things I would rather do than watch Witless Protection...

1. Shove my hand into a functioning blender.
2. Tie steaks to my arms, legs and privates and proceed to jump into shark-infested waters.
3. Eat a broken glass sandwich.
4. Take a vacation with Tom Cruise.
5. Live in a world without Larry the Cable Guy (well, actually that one would be rather fun for me)

Anywho, you guys get the idea. What do you think?