TheShape, I can definitely see why the number of coincidences bothers people. Some of the ones you pointed out really didn't affect my viewing of the movie, but other points of the story I really felt required better explaining, or less unbelievable events. Here are my thoughts:
- The meteor with the symbiote happens to fall right next to Peter and MJ.
I didn't like meteor origin. I liked TAS's approach, and wish it were something more along of those lines (rescuing Jameson's son from a crashing shuttle which picked up the symbiote on its mission.) On a very related note, I must point out that many people said after the movie, "Why did the goo latch on to Peter, and not anyone else? It could have latched onto some animal, or MJ!" That bothered me, since that one seemed quite easy to explain (it's a living thing, which is looking to bond to something strong.)
- Flint Marko just happens to fall into the atomization bowl and become Sandman.
I think this is along the lines of the original spider bite. It would be difficult to have him become Sandman without some sort of freak accident.
- The man that becomes Sandman just happens to be Uncle Ben's actual killer.
I didn't think that the whole Uncle Ben angle was really necessary. Though this was a pretty big one, it didn't really take away from the movie for me.
-Out of all the people in New York City, the one woman that needed to be saved in the crane disaster was Gwen Stacy, who is Peter's lab partner.
I didn't really understand why Gwen needed to be so many things to Peter. Lab partner, saved during the crane accident, girlfriend(ish) of Peter's rival. Perhaps Peter could have already been in the building with her before the crane goes bezerk, kind of like he was for the bank or fusion experiment scenes in SM2. I find those more believable than this coincidence.
- Eddie Brock just happens to be in the same church as Peter when he is ripping off the symbiote.
Like the Sandman origin, or Spider-Man's, or Ock's for that matter, I think that this one was excusable. However, if the writers had to change either the Sandman or Venom's birth in this movie, I'd choose Venom; Sandman's birth is more predicated on a freak accident.
- Bernard, the butler, decides to reveal the truth about Norman's death to Harry at the perfect time, which allows Harry to go to the construction site to aid Peter.
Of all the coincidences, this was the only one that actually bothered me. While I do understand the argument that many have made that it makes sense in the whole "keeping his father's honor for all these years, and finally revealing it when it really was necessary" light, it just seemed ridiculous.
- Sandman just happens to run into Venom in the streets of New York, and Venom knows Flint Marko's life story (I know there was background here that was deleted from the theatrical release but it still came out like a random coincidence).
This wasn't so much a coincidence as it was just really convenient. They didn't "happen to run" into eachother, they both were scouring the city for eachother. I definitely wish they went with the sandcastle/park exchange, or the way it was done in the video game.