Bastard Moderator from Hell
- Thread starter Malice
- Start date
The Lumberjack
Superhero
- Joined
- Mar 18, 2003
- Messages
- 8,525
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 31
These get better and better each time. Awesome job!!!
Malice
BMFH
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2001
- Messages
- 12,734
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 31
Bastard Moderator from Hell - 8
by Malice
(influenced by the Bastard Operator from Hell stories from yester year)
9:12am (Sunday)
Malice opens his eyes and finds he cant move his legs. looking to his legs, he realizes his dog is laying on his legs, asleep, and drooling on his left left.
"Get Off Mutt!"
Malice kicks the dog off his legs.
*misc curses as Malice falls off the bed because his legs are asleep*
Slowly getting back to his feet, he stands and wanders to the kitchen, where he looks, and sees the coffee machine is turned off, and there is no coffee in the pot.
*scream*
Malice promptly start the coffee maker and wanders into the study...completely unarmed and defenseless to the rigors of Hype!
Jiggling the mouse, Malice wakes his computer up from its nightly porn download. Opening Firefox, he goes to Hype. Suprisingly, no PMs!
Hot Damn!
Opening Thunderbird, he starts checking the mail from CS and SHH. Then Malice sees this....
Downloading 1 of 7322
Downloading 2 of 7322
*scream*
Malice gets back up and curls in bed to await his courage to be brewed.
by Malice
(influenced by the Bastard Operator from Hell stories from yester year)
9:12am (Sunday)
Malice opens his eyes and finds he cant move his legs. looking to his legs, he realizes his dog is laying on his legs, asleep, and drooling on his left left.
"Get Off Mutt!"
Malice kicks the dog off his legs.
*misc curses as Malice falls off the bed because his legs are asleep*
Slowly getting back to his feet, he stands and wanders to the kitchen, where he looks, and sees the coffee machine is turned off, and there is no coffee in the pot.
*scream*
Malice promptly start the coffee maker and wanders into the study...completely unarmed and defenseless to the rigors of Hype!
Jiggling the mouse, Malice wakes his computer up from its nightly porn download. Opening Firefox, he goes to Hype. Suprisingly, no PMs!
Hot Damn!
Opening Thunderbird, he starts checking the mail from CS and SHH. Then Malice sees this....
Downloading 1 of 7322
Downloading 2 of 7322
*scream*
Malice gets back up and curls in bed to await his courage to be brewed.
superman_blaze
Hey :)
- Joined
- Oct 30, 2003
- Messages
- 896
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 11
just as long as you keep writing i dont really mind who you torment
superman_blaze
Hey :)
- Joined
- Oct 30, 2003
- Messages
- 896
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 11
so do i 
InsomniacFreak
Sidekick
- Joined
- Jul 24, 2004
- Messages
- 1,087
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 31
Malice said:
Please do describe in detail for us your account of the swift and merciless justice associated with infamous spider-man2 manspider thread. (Which was appropriate btw).
- Joined
- Feb 15, 2001
- Messages
- 62,413
- Reaction score
- 4,327
- Points
- 203
I can't wait to see the part when Malice meets me at the local saloon, where we'll raise up our glasses against evil forces and sing...well you know
Phoney Bone
Avenger
- Joined
- Aug 4, 2003
- Messages
- 16,811
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 31
"Whiskey for my men, beer for my horses?"
InsomniacFreak
Sidekick
- Joined
- Jul 24, 2004
- Messages
- 1,087
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 31
Malice has writer's block or perhaps he was a little too efficient at deleting the really stupid hypesters' accounts and has no new moronic activity to report upon? (rrriiigggghhhttt).
Cmon Malice, I'm so uninspired of late, I need you to bring me back to life with more jaded, sadistic tales of your daily routine. It gives me some kind of sick satisfaction just knowing that my life sucks less than yours does.
Cmon Malice, I'm so uninspired of late, I need you to bring me back to life with more jaded, sadistic tales of your daily routine. It gives me some kind of sick satisfaction just knowing that my life sucks less than yours does.
Malice
BMFH
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2001
- Messages
- 12,734
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 31
Bastard Moderator from Hell - 9
by Malice
(influenced by the Bastard Operator from Hell stories from yester year)
6:00pm - Sunday Night
Malice sits in his nice pleather (yes Pure PLEATHER!) office chair relaxing. He grabs his beer and jiggles his mouse to get the monitor to come back on.
After a moment, it does, and Malice clicks on the Azureus icon in the bottom right hand corner, to see the status of his torrent porn/bondage/mp3/DVD-Rip downloads.
After picking a few he wished to get done first, he open a browser to Hype!
Malice deletes 12 new PMs and decides, its time to work.
He smacks his hands together, and opens up a new browser to the admin panel, a new IE browser to login Malice-Test, and a Opera to login Malice-Test.
"Lets see, what constructive work can I do today!? How bout a little cleanup...."
Malice does a search thru the user database for those users in the Email-Awating Activation Group...pulls up 72 users. Malice promptly selects the box to signify SELECT-ALL then hits the delete button.
"72 loosers no longer on the board."
Again, Malice does a search thru the user database. This time, he keys his search on any user who has not visited the Hype in a 30 days. The screen shows the beginnings of a large list, 11671 users. Again, SELECT-ALL - DELETE!
"11671 non-dedicated loosers have been pruned."
Malice then decided to look at the overall size of the database. Looking, he sees that it Data usage is 1,168.36 MB. OK that is way too big. Promply clicking on the Threads and Posts Admin link, then the Prune button. The screen prompts him. Malice tells it to prune everything over 14 days. That should free up some space! After hitting the button, the screen starts pruning. For two hours its deleting posts.
Malice gets up and heads to the kitchen to make dinner.
Coming back, he sees he has accomplished his mission. Only 32MB used in the database.
Mission acconplished.
Opening Thunderbird, malice starts to type a message to Mirko:
"Hey Mirko...
How goes it?
Well I have some good news. I have pruned a few posts and users. They were dead-weight and no longer needing to be on the forums.
NOTE: Make sure your fee you pay for the ISP goes down because of this.
Your truly,
Malice, The SHH Admin"
Sending the message, Malice feels like he has accomplished something for the power of good today.
by Malice
(influenced by the Bastard Operator from Hell stories from yester year)
6:00pm - Sunday Night
Malice sits in his nice pleather (yes Pure PLEATHER!) office chair relaxing. He grabs his beer and jiggles his mouse to get the monitor to come back on.
After a moment, it does, and Malice clicks on the Azureus icon in the bottom right hand corner, to see the status of his torrent porn/bondage/mp3/DVD-Rip downloads.
After picking a few he wished to get done first, he open a browser to Hype!
Malice deletes 12 new PMs and decides, its time to work.
He smacks his hands together, and opens up a new browser to the admin panel, a new IE browser to login Malice-Test, and a Opera to login Malice-Test.
"Lets see, what constructive work can I do today!? How bout a little cleanup...."
Malice does a search thru the user database for those users in the Email-Awating Activation Group...pulls up 72 users. Malice promptly selects the box to signify SELECT-ALL then hits the delete button.
"72 loosers no longer on the board."
Again, Malice does a search thru the user database. This time, he keys his search on any user who has not visited the Hype in a 30 days. The screen shows the beginnings of a large list, 11671 users. Again, SELECT-ALL - DELETE!
"11671 non-dedicated loosers have been pruned."
Malice then decided to look at the overall size of the database. Looking, he sees that it Data usage is 1,168.36 MB. OK that is way too big. Promply clicking on the Threads and Posts Admin link, then the Prune button. The screen prompts him. Malice tells it to prune everything over 14 days. That should free up some space! After hitting the button, the screen starts pruning. For two hours its deleting posts.
Malice gets up and heads to the kitchen to make dinner.
Coming back, he sees he has accomplished his mission. Only 32MB used in the database.
Mission acconplished.
Opening Thunderbird, malice starts to type a message to Mirko:
"Hey Mirko...
How goes it?
Well I have some good news. I have pruned a few posts and users. They were dead-weight and no longer needing to be on the forums.
NOTE: Make sure your fee you pay for the ISP goes down because of this.
Your truly,
Malice, The SHH Admin"
Sending the message, Malice feels like he has accomplished something for the power of good today.
C
Cloud Strife
Guest
What exactly do you do for a living Malice ?
C
Cloud Strife
Guest
Of course .Venom_uk said:Besides torture random hype members you mean?
Malice
BMFH
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2001
- Messages
- 12,734
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 31
Raykel said:So if you removed everyone's ability to PM back in post #4, why are you still getting so many PMs?
Note to self: if ever you need to PM Malice, make subject header "Porn" or "I Want to Have Your Child."
NOW ya get it!
Malice
BMFH
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2001
- Messages
- 12,734
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 31
Cloud Strife said:
Malice is the All-powerful Forum Admin for SHH! and CS!
Malice is an unfeeling robot built by the hand of God (Mirko).
Malice is the Alpha and the Omega.
The finger behind Malice, John, is a Network Administrator/Husband/and hopefully in the future, Father.
C
Cloud Strife
Guest
Really , that's nice to know.Malice said:
Similar threads
Users who are viewing this thread
Staff online
-
Hunter RiderRonin -
SwordOfMorningSuper Moderator -
Lily Adler🔥 Hot Scoops 🍨 -
DKDetectiveBoo Boo Bubbles (he/him)
Latest posts
-
🌎 Discussion: Media, Journalism, Cable News, Media Bias, and Other Media Issues (4 Viewers)- Latest: DJ Kornphlake
-
-
-
-
