• The upgrade to XenForo 2.3.7 has now been completed. Please report any issues to our administrators.

Bought/Thought 12/17

Batgirl #6...by Beechen
Really goo...oh wait no, this was still ****. :dry: Nevermind.

(3.9 out of 10)


How do you gage a 3.9, what's the dif between 3.9 and 3.8 or 4.0, why not just a 3 out of 10, what make it a 3.9 instead of just a 3, or do just pull random numbers out of your as.... oh wait, I mean the negative zone?
 
Last edited:
The rest of the Starjammers (Lilandra, Marvel Girl, and Korvac, who stole his weapon from Cloud Strife) are busy reclaiming their ship from the Shi'ar grunts and planning to rescue their allies. Standard set up stuff for a first issue. I honestly have no clue how the hell Korvac sheathes a sword that is bigger than he is without elastic limbs; one friend told me the blade sort of vanishes like a light saber, but it still looks a bit awkward.
It's Korvus, actually.

The only reason he can lift that sword (the Blade of the Phoenix) is because he's the last descendant of Rook'shir, a former host of the Phoenix Force. As far as he knows, he's the only person in the universe who can wield it, although Rachel probably could. Oh, and it doesn't vanish like a lightsaber. It's always that big.
 
How do you gage a 3.9, what's the dif between 3.9 and 3.8 or 4.0, why not just a 3 out of 10, what make it a 3.9 instead of just a 3, or do just pull random numbers out of your as.... oh wait, I mean the negative zone?
A very good question, elswick1979! :up: Indeed, it is often difficult for the uninitiated to discern all that intricate minutiae of my blindingly superb rating system. Indeed, the genius behind my cunning ratings is comparable to that of Reed Richards' deductions or Grant Morrison's brain: far too flawless to be fully understood by anyone but them.

The answer to your bamboozling conundrum, my flaccid tadpole, is quite simple: sometimes a book is closer to a 6 than a 5, or closer to a 4 than a 3. What does that mean? It means that to group all comics under merely ten rigid scores does no justice to the depths of my criticism, and might actually misrepresent the true nuances of the comic in question. Take a look at this week, for instance: an 8.8 is closer to a 9 than an 8, and a 9.2 is closer to a 9 than a 10...so what if, say, I had given both Mighty Avengers and Buffy simply a 9 out of 10? Well I would have misrepresented my opinions, then, because I in my inviolate logic believe that Mighty Avengers is actually better than Buffy this week. Why would I then give them the same score? That would be quite ****brained of me.

You might then ask, why not give Buffy an 8 and Mighty Avengers a 9? You would then be very a silly rabbit indeed. Suppose that I considered the issue of Green Lantern Corps last week an 8.1 out of 10. By the standard that you so dully proposed, I would have given both GLC and Buffy an 8 out of 10, when in fact I thought that Buffy was in fact notably better than GLC, in fact.

But what does a 7 or an 8 or a 9 mean, you ask? Well, fortunately for you, I had previously prepared an astoundingly efficient list of definitions and examples beautifully explaining the subtle yet sexy distinctions between the general gamut of my opinions. Observe!

BrianWilly said:
10 Classic. Nothing about this book strikes you wrong and everything about it strikes you right. Faults aren't even faults, but are either quirks instead or utter non-issues in the face of so much ****ing awesome.
Ex: Blue Beetle #24, Astonishing X-Men #23, Fray, Black Adam: The Dark Age, Annihilation

9 Awesome. The reason we read comics. Any faults are mere nitpicks and virtually negligible.
Ex: Infinite Crisis, Dr. Strange: The Oath, JLA: World War III, All-Star Superman, Rucka's Wonder Woman, Checkmate, Gotham Central.

8 Great. Books regularly hitting this stride are required pull-list material. Some faults, though they rarely detract from the reading experience in a notable way.
Ex: Green Lantern Corps, Morrison's New X-Men, Fallen Angel, Identity Crisis, 52, Young Avengers, Booster Gold, Nova

7 Good. A safe and reliably pleasant comic with memorable goodness. There are several avoidable faults that take away from the experience, but generally it's a solid cut above the rest.
Winick's early Green Arrow, The All-New Atom, Slott's She-Hulk, BKV's Runaways, New X-Men: Academy X, World War Hulk #1

6 Tolerable. Worth a read-through for some nice story or character moments, but a number of distractingly weighty faults are beginning to take their toll. Proceed with caution.
Ex: Winick's middle Green Arrow, Civil War, Sinestro Corps War, McKeever's Bird's of Prey, Avengers: The Initiative, The Trials of Shazam

5 Average. Anything good is countered with something equally bad. Any book with this score and below doesn't deserve your money for any reason whatsoever.
Ex: New Avengers, Mighty Avengers, McKeever's Teen Titans, Millar's Ultimates, McDuffie/Burnett's Justice League of America, World War Hulk #5

4 Unacceptable. It's not that it doesn't have good things, it's just that the good things are incredibly hard to appreciate because crushing mistakes are being made here that could easily have been not made.
Ex: Winick's late Green Arrow, Craig/Yost's New X-Men, Kelly's Supergirl, Austen's Uncanny X-Men, Picoult's Wonder Woman

3 Bad. Very few things to recommend, if any, and a great deal of things going against it, including an abundance of poor characterization, poor story, poor dialogue/scripting, poor pacing, general pointlessness, or usually some combination of the above.
Ex: Avengers: Disassembled, House of M, X-Men: Deadly Genesis, JLA/JSA: The Lightning Saga, Beechen's Teen Titans, Spider-Man: The Other, Ultimate Nightmare/Extinction/whatever

2 Horrible. There's no excuse for the things that have transpired here; every single person involved should have known better. Still, you can at least sort of see where they tried to not suck so hard, and probably didn't mean to create something so offensively bad.
Ex: Countdown to Final Crisis, Spider-Man: Sins Past, Ultimate War, Loeb's Supergirl, New Avengers #20, Civil War: The Return

1 Trash. Comical in its ineptitude, as in it'd be funny if it weren't so sad. It's like the creators intentionally set out to make a ludicrously ****** product and to piss off as many people as they possibly can. Doomed to become running gags in future comics and in-jokes on the internet.
Ex: Civil War: Frontline #11, Spider-Man: One More Day

0 The Anti-Life Equation. The Beast of Judgment. It is the dark at the end of everything. The end of universes, gods, worlds...of everything.
Ex: Amazons Attack.
As you can see, both New Avengers and McKeever's Titans rate an unimpressive 5 -- "average" -- on my scale, and yet the fact is that I generally find McKeever's Titans to be worserer than New Avengers. When taking into account the assgasming depths of my opinions -- more facts than opinions, really, what with them being so indisputable -- every bit of detail matters!

Now aren't you glad you askeHGNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGHHHH
pukecatewk3.jpg
 
Funny how I can read more comics at work than when I'm home. It snowed in Washington; so, no school for the kids and no work for me to go to.

Let's see what I read:

Buffy #20 was a pretty good read. I liked how it was a one-shot, paying tribute to the first season of Buffy. A really cute, funny, heartwarming story.

Zorro #9 starts a new story arc, and as I've said before, I enjoy it so much more than Lone Ranger. You actually feel like you get your money's worth with this comic, as it takes longer than five minutes to read.

Greatest American Hero #1 appears to be retelling the origin of the G.A.H.. Not sure how closely it resembles the original pilot episode, as I was just a small kid when I saw it. The art isn't the best; but, I loved this tv show as a kid, and I'll probably give the second issue a go. (He hasn't even worn or seen the outfit yet.)

Black Terror #2 continues, as Project Superpowers goes on hiatus with a few series that will focus on various characters. This one reads pretty good, as the Black Terror invades the White House in search of his old sidekick.

Terminator Revolution #1 seems pretty forgettable. Probably won't bother buying the second issue. It's the worst of what I've read today.

Walking Dead #56 is still amazing! It's my favorite Kirkman series, and the new characters really seem interesting. They sure appear more trouble than they are worth, and it's good to see the main character coming back around.

Dog Eaters #2 came out this week, and I never knew there was an issue #1. I picked up both, as I always buy anything by Dabel Bros. This isn't their best comic; but, it's not bad, like Terminator, either. It's the future, and after most of the population has been killed off, the remaining stragglers fight to survive, very much like Mad Max. (Dog Eaters refers to the fact that the people will eat dogs in order to get some meat in their diet.) As you can figure, it's not very original. Still, I like to read something besides superhero comics; so, I'll stick with it, most likely, for it's entire six issue run.


I haven't touched any of my Marvel or DC books. The kids keep me too busy when it's just me and them. I still have to read the following Independant books: Conan The Cimmerian, Dresden Files - Storm Front, and Take A Chance.
 
I don't have the strength to write a full-on review of X-Men: Kingbreaker #1, but there are a few things I'd like to say.

-I like Yost. I hate Kyle & Yost, but I like Yost by himself. He's apparently the reasonably half of the team that doesn't need to make every issue a bloodbath.

-I think it's brilliant that Vulcan has no clue how to run his empire, and his subordinates clearly see it. I mean, he sent the Imperial Guard (whose job is to watch over him) to the frontlines of a war, and thinned out his fleet so badly that nobody can capture Lilandra & The Phoenix Kids. It shows that he has no sense of how the empire is structured, and that he was actually stupid enough to task his entire military with external matters when he still has a very powerful threat within the empire. The best moment of the whole thing was when he randomly decided it'd be a good idea to round up prisoners of the empire and make them his new Imperial Guard (because the last time the Shi'ar sent a prisoner to kill Rachel Summers... well, they're bumping uglies), and his nearby subordinates looked at each other like Vulcan was crazy. It was all brought home in the last two pages, where it was implied that somebody working for Vulcan distrusts him enough to secretly help Havok break out of his cell.
 
Has anyone read Impaler #1 yet? I picked it up today but i'm saving it for 2morrow at work. I did read Punisher War Zone 1/2 & Terminator Revolution.

I agree with Phaedrus45 about Terminator Revolution. It was so dull and now it's banned!

Phaedrus45 , Let me know how Dresden Files is. I'm interested in it but i got to my $$ limit today. Still regretting Terminator buy. LOL
 
I loved the first Dresden Files series; but, have yet to read issues one and two of this new series. I should get to it tomorrow, as school has been cancelled again for the kids.
 
Gave the first 2 trades of Invincible a try.

Thought it was okay,fairly standard superhero stuff with some cool twists here and there (his daddy).After all the high praise I thought this was going to be better.I don't think I'm going to follow through the rest of the series,it just wasn't my thing.

Invincible actually breaks out of that mold and starts getting really good at the third trade. Check that out and if you still feel that way drop it, but I had a similiar feeling until I read that and now it's one of my favorite books.
 
I want to get those hardcover omnibuses of Invincible. I think it's about time I finally caught up on it.

Dark Reign: New Nation was a solid read. The only story I didn't enjoy was the Skrull Kill Krew one because, frankly, it seems pretty pointless. I kind of hated the Agents of Atlas one at first, but then I absolutely loved it when I saw what Parker was doing with the team. They live in a world ruled by a villain who's considered a hero now? Well, in order to be heroes, they've gotta start acting like villains. I can't wait to see where that goes. :) The Secret Warriors story was decent, although I don't see myself reading the series. I don't know, this all feels too small-time for Fury. Plus, with the Skrull invasion over, what are the Secret Warriors supposed to be secretly warring against now? General geopolitical troubles? That sounds kind of like Secret War with a new cast of characters who aren't as good as the first cast was. The Reunion was just awkward. Bobbi's doing some kind of clandestine spy junk now? I'll probably still pick up the one-shot, but this has the potential to be obnoxious. Just let Clint and Bobbi be happy together, for crying out loud.
 
Last edited:
No, I didn't expect them to. I just wish they would. Couples can never seem to stay together in comics.
 
The Marvel universe citizens passed "distrustful" in the 60's. Nowadays they are paranoid, hysterical ingrates who don't appreciate what true heroism is until a hero is dead....maybe. Deep down they yearn to be ruled by some despot in some slave state scenerio and these pesky heroes keep getting in the way. :p

Yeah, you could call them "distrustful" if they weren't blindly, ******edly trustful of any actually murderous psychopath in a position of power.
 
Last edited:
Plus, with the Skrull invasion over, what are the Secret Warriors supposed to be secretly warring against now? General geopolitical troubles?

Think of it as the "Batman and the Outsiders" of the Marvel Universe, cause that's basically what it's going to be. OR at least that's how it seems.
 
A very good question, elswick1979! :up: Indeed, it is often difficult for the uninitiated to discern all that intricate minutiae of my blindingly superb rating system. Indeed, the genius behind my cunning ratings is comparable to that of Reed Richards' deductions or Grant Morrison's brain: far too flawless to be fully understood by anyone but them.

The answer to your bamboozling conundrum, my flaccid tadpole, is quite simple: sometimes a book is closer to a 6 than a 5, or closer to a 4 than a 3. What does that mean? It means that to group all comics under merely ten rigid scores does no justice to the depths of my criticism, and might actually misrepresent the true nuances of the comic in question. Take a look at this week, for instance: an 8.8 is closer to a 9 than an 8, and a 9.2 is closer to a 9 than a 10...so what if, say, I had given both Mighty Avengers and Buffy simply a 9 out of 10? Well I would have misrepresented my opinions, then, because I in my inviolate logic believe that Mighty Avengers is actually better than Buffy this week. Why would I then give them the same score? That would be quite ****brained of me.

You might then ask, why not give Buffy an 8 and Mighty Avengers a 9? You would then be very a silly rabbit indeed. Suppose that I considered the issue of Green Lantern Corps last week an 8.1 out of 10. By the standard that you so dully proposed, I would have given both GLC and Buffy an 8 out of 10, when in fact I thought that Buffy was in fact notably better than GLC, in fact.

But what does a 7 or an 8 or a 9 mean, you ask? Well, fortunately for you, I had previously prepared an astoundingly efficient list of definitions and examples beautifully explaining the subtle yet sexy distinctions between the general gamut of my opinions. Observe!

As you can see, both New Avengers and McKeever's Titans rate an unimpressive 5 -- "average" -- on my scale, and yet the fact is that I generally find McKeever's Titans to be worserer than New Avengers. When taking into account the assgasming depths of my opinions -- more facts than opinions, really, what with them being so indisputable -- every bit of detail matters!

Now aren't you glad you askeHGNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGHHHH
pukecatewk3.jpg


Thanks for the answer but I'm not reading all of that. I think I got the jest of it you go on a 100 point scale and put decimals in. Atleast there is a method to your madness.
 
Think of it as the "Batman and the Outsiders" of the Marvel Universe, cause that's basically what it's going to be. OR at least that's how it seems.
I quit reading Batman and the Outsiders because I lost interest, so apparently I'm already thinking of the Secret Warriors as the Batman and the Outsiders of the Marvel universe. ;)
 
how is powers anyway?
and for that matter hows fables
Powers is good. The dialogue isn't always tops, but the whole superhero/crime thing is cool.

Fables is excellent. It's one of the best comics being put out right now.
 
Spider-Man Noir #1
Just read this, and I enjoyed the heck out of it. I picked up the X-Men Noir when it came out on a whim and liked it a lot, so I made sure to pick up this one as well. I'm really surprised by this little offshoot of the Marvel Universe. Some of the most interesting writing and plot I've seen in a long time.
 
Powers is good. The dialogue isn't always tops, but the whole superhero/crime thing is cool.

Fables is excellent. It's one of the best comics being put out right now.

I thought the dialogue in Powers was top notch.The conversations seem to flow and make for very long reads (which isn't a bad thing).There is alot of dialogue but it's all necessary and it really enhances the fact that these characters are interacting with each other and not just talking at each other.
 
It's Korvus, actually.

The only reason he can lift that sword (the Blade of the Phoenix) is because he's the last descendant of Rook'shir, a former host of the Phoenix Force. As far as he knows, he's the only person in the universe who can wield it, although Rachel probably could. Oh, and it doesn't vanish like a lightsaber. It's always that big.

I meant Korvus, I guess I kept typing Korvac because I know him better.

If the blade doesn't vanish, then it makes no sense how he can sheathe it without needing about 5 minutes to lay the sheathe on the floor, slide the 5-6' blade into it carefully and then hoist it on his back. I know it's comics and there is a suspension of belief and all, but I have to see that sword every time I see Korvus, and it makes me roll my eyes every time I see it sheathed.

Yeah, you could call them "distrustful" if they weren't blindly, ******edly trustful of any actually murderous psychopath in a position of power.

Indeed. The government will trust any villain that crosses their fingers behind their back and agrees to be grunts but never any true hero. Maybe it's J.J. syndrome on a massive scale. All the citizens are jealous of true heroism and selflessness, so they do everything en masse to make it worthless.

Marvel Earth citizens seriously need a species psychologist or something.

I must say, I'm disappointed. People have been nagging me to read INCREDIBLE HERCULES for nearly a year, and when I finally do, no one even mentions it. Humph.
 
God-Size Thor one-shot
Dear lord, what a wonderful comic. Fraction's work on Thor has been hit-or-miss, but he hit this one into the stratosphere. Everything about this issue was fantastic, from the use of classic, Simonson-era continuity to the different art styles and narrators for each segment to the emotional characterizations to the plot itself. Outside of not really liking the last artist's work too much, this is about as close to a perfect single issue that I've seen in a long time.

Oddly enough, I totally didn't guess the "villain" of this story, which is weird because it's so incredibly obvious. I had one of those face-palm "oh, duh" moments when I saw who it was. Obvious or not, though, it makes the story incredibly touching, taking what was already there in the Lee and Simonson eras and adding new layers and depths to a key relationship from those periods in a surprisingly unobtrusive way.

I literally closed the back cover of this issue and just sat there, basking in the glow of total comic satisfaction in a way I haven't done since... probably back when Incredible Herc started, actually. Just a thoroughly, truly, wonderfully enjoyable comic in every way--except for the last artist, although he's not really bad, just kind of muddy and unclear in places. But even he was trumped by the sheer slaphappy joy of flipping to Chapter Three and being socked in the face with the Allreds' bold, kitschy, fun artwork on Thor, probably the last place I'd ever expect to find it.

Oh, and I skipped the reprint because I actually read that story again not too long ago, but I envy those who did read it here for the first time because it's awesome, too. :up:
 
I must say, I'm disappointed. People have been nagging me to read INCREDIBLE HERCULES for nearly a year, and when I finally do, no one even mentions it. Humph.
We're still debating what series to bully you into reading next.

I'm glad you enjoyed it; the next is my favourite so far.
 
Haha, I just saw Dread's comment about Korvus' sword. I reflexively rolled my eyes at it when I was reading Kingbreaker #1. Giant swords are stupid enough in anime; we don't need them invading American comics as well. :o
 
No, I didn't expect them to. I just wish they would. Couples can never seem to stay together in comics.
I don't think Bobbi is the Bobbi. I think we might be dealing with another imposter or something. Which would lame, but I can't think of any other reason she'd almost call Clint by another name. Unless they are going to imply she's a cheating ****e who got it on with a Skrull while captured. :o
 
I must say, I'm disappointed. People have been nagging me to read INCREDIBLE HERCULES for nearly a year, and when I finally do, no one even mentions it. Humph.

That's because you didn't praise it enough!
 
We're still debating what series to bully you into reading next.

I'm glad you enjoyed it; the next is my favourite so far.

Oh, boy.

Haha, I just saw Dread's comment about Korvus' sword. I reflexively rolled my eyes at it when I was reading Kingbreaker #1. Giant swords are stupid enough in anime; we don't need them invading American comics as well. :o

Agreed. Like I said in my review, Cloud Strife wants his sword back. :p

That's because you didn't praise it enough!

I liked it, but I'm not going to lie and say I like it more than I like CAPTAIN AMERICA or NOVA, which would both be tied for #1 from Marvel for me. As I stated elsewhere, I like it about as much as GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY, which would be tied with #2 from Marvel for me.

Secondly, having finished the rest, INCREDIBLE HERCULES got better with SECRET INVASION and LOVE AND WAR. I'll whip up a review of that in a few.

Lastly, upon hopping onto a good series after ignoring it for a year or so, my initial review is never terribly slavish. I'm sure someone anal retentive could look back at my first CAPTAIN AMERICA review and it wasn't nearly as worship-ful as some later ones of the regular issues got. Psychologically speaking, a very lavish first review would be a clear statement of being wrong in not buying it sooner, and I am one of those people who would rather shove my own hand into a meat grinder than admit I was wrong to a public forum. :word:
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Back
Top
monitoring_string = "afb8e5d7348ab9e99f73cba908f10802"