BOUGHT/THOUGHT for May 16, 2007

[Darthphere]

Darth, read Plain Janes and tell me to buy it. I need reassurance


I also need teenage girls.:heart:

Will do.

 

[Marcdachamp]

Darth, House of M had its issues, but the Pulse issue featuring Hawkeye was fantastic. It really set an interesting direction for the character. My only problem was that it should've happened in the mini itself.

 

[Darthphere]

Whatever you say.

 

[Not Jake]

I personally would kinda dig Hawkeye trying out as Cap for awhile.

 

[Marcdachamp]

Whatever you say.

You read it?

 

[Dread]

Average haul this week, which is about 4-5 comics; however, THE SPIRIT #6 will be a week late due to a "printing error" which got me in a bit of a funk as that was likely going to be my Shining Jewel of the Week. Still, not a terrible week all around but there were works less than perfect.

It appears we have two VERY late books shipping this week: ULTIMATES 2 #13, which arrives 8 months after it's last issue, and ALL-STAR BATMAN & ROBIN THE BOY WONDER #5, which is a week or so shy of 1 year since it's last issue (we have a new BATTLE CHASERS, folks!). Out of outright disgust, I picked one of them to drop, and as ULTIMATES 2 #13 is at least the finale, while we still have another 1-2 issues of ALL-STAR BATS at least, I chose the latter. After all, I am a Marvel Zombie. And, frankly, Ultimates 2 despite the flaws is probably the stronger story, although that is like comparing the better of two inbreds. I flipped through ALL-STAR BATMAN #5, though, and saw Superman kissing WW, a woman having an orgasm and saying, "I love you" to Batman after he saves her, and Grayson saying something melodramatic while holding an axe. I couldn't be less interested. Frank Miller has written some classic works. But everything since maybe 300 or the last bits of SIN CITY has been a mess, especially his stabs at DC works. DK2 should have told DC that he clearly isn't up to snuff on Batman anymore, but apparently they are the type who allow ex-legends to forever peddle out absolute feces because at one time they delivered gold (much like, oh, Chris Claremont for the past decade or so, or John Byrne), so yay for loyalty. Or attempting to draw blood from a stone.

Besides, if I change my mind, the issue will still be there on the shelf in dozens after a few months. Got to love ridiculous overorders in stores.

As always, full spoilers.

DREAD'S BOUGHT/THOUGHT for 5/16/07:

MIGHTY AVENGERS #3: Still a very flawed team comic, which is about what one can expect from Bendis, but to compare this to the first 3 issues of NEW AVENGERS, and even as is, it seems more together and enjoyable. A noteable aside; in today's NEW YORK POST, apparently because it is a slow news day, they printed a picture of a new MARY JANE statue modeled after the work of Adam Hughes that depicts MJ washing the Spidey costume while bending over and revealing her bum, a thong, and most of her cleavage. Some fans, especially the few female ones that exist, were outraged at this blatent sexualization of an iconic character. Surely we have come forward in the last decade or so, some bemoan. Well, look at your cover to MA #3, where Black Widow & Tigra are literally shoving their asses into the camera as typical of heroines in most art. Inside you have Lady Ultron fighting in full nudity, with bits of silver covering her nipples and "lower region" to avoid the wrath of the PC police. And of course Frank Cho is hardly known for the artwork of MEN after all. I mean as a straight man I don't want to see Sentry shoving his crotch into the camera or running a finger over his abs, but I do acknowledge the double standard. Anyway, that aside done, into the issue itself. The plot continues to move along, only this time it reads easier because there are no more ripoff MEMENTO stype flashbacks. Ms. Marvel stages a strategic retreat to analyze the energy she absorbed from Lady Ultron at SHIELD while Sentry goes toe to toe with the woman. Now, okay, without even reading it, guess who wins. Hint: Bendis writing a woman with a codename. Anyone who reads USM knows the answer; outside of ALIAS, Bendis chicks are UNBEATABLE, especially if they are antagonists, barring his last minute "person comes in from nowhere, instantly saves the day and explains it in such a boring manner it makes you BEG for NARUTO" that was SECRET WAR. In no point is Lady Ultron challenged at all and without any explanation she pwn's Sentry. It was, however, well staged for once, so I didn't mind too much. He attempts to drop the Triskalon and Wonder Man FINALLY flies to help Ms. Marvel and Sentry stop it. What was the hold-up? Black Widow also uses her SHIELD rank to assume command of the Triskalon when everyone else is busy, earning Ares' affections. The thought bubbles are still here, but they weren't as annoying as Bendis' usual cookie cutter, useless dialogue; I swear I read "Oh my god!" a 100 times. Give me cornball exposition compared to 67 F'ing panals of one word answers. The group calls on Dr. Pym, who appears to have become a mack since getting a divorce; in BEYOND!, he was getting liplock from Firebird, and having pangs of guilt about it. But, heh heh, since when does Bendis actually read the work of anyone but himself? BKV should bow down on his knees and thank the heavens that Bendis perhaps felt his lowly (low in comparison to the unabashed flawlessness that is anything Bendis writes, of course) work THE HOOD worthy of his bald attention to read before using the character. So here Pym is getting things on with Tigra before he is interrupted. I mean McDuffie wasn't exactly writing Firebird in much of a different role here than Bendis writes Tigra, but if both count, then Pym looks like a himbo, going through lady heroines like trash. Granted, that never stopped Green Arrow or Nightwing. Eh, I guess a guy coming out of a divorce and with a universe of hot superhero ladies about is justified in cleaning up. Of course, we would NEVER see a heroine cleaning up on hot superhero men and not appearing to be written as a soulless ****e. Speaking of which, Wasp is utterly wasted in this book, much as Iron Fist and sometimes Spider-Woman are utterly wasted in New Avengers. She says a few lines and does jack s***. You could remove her and the story is effected in no way. Bendis has enough problems with teams, period, why does he insist on rosters of 7+ when he can barely handle 5 or 6? For F's sake, cater to your strengths. I suppose some say that MIGHTY AVENGERS is good, clean dumb fun and I can understand that, but this is good, clean, dumb fun with the same people who are ACTING AS IRON MAN'S STORMTROOPER FASCIST SQUAD in NEW AVENGERS within the same month! These are the same heroes who looked the other way at all the atrocities that Iron Man & the Pro SHRA forces did during CW to "throw" the audience and have not once atoned for it; Ms. Marvel is sometimes guilt-ridden, but follows through just as obediently as Black Widow, who at least honestly doesn't give a frag. And as this book is going to be overrated and oversold anyway, it may as well attempt to strive to be more than dumb, brainless action. I mean if I wanted that, get Millar on here because he excels on that. Hopefully explanations about how Ultron has corrupted Tony, why he attacked Mole Man, what happened to Tony and how he/she/it is gaining all those god-moder powers comes in future issues, but much like THE COLLECTIVE, it may not be in any way worth your time. Pretty pictures, and better/more fun than #2 though, so call it an improvement. Compare it to NA #1-3 and it is God. And at least the roster seems more balanced.

MOON KNIGHT #10: Still a good, solid dark superhero relaunch, but moving along a bit too slowly. On the plus side, Suayan has allowed the book to ship within one month an issue since, I don't know, Finch's first 2-3 issues. Ironically, Punisher graced the cover last issue, but only appeared in one panel; this issue Midnight graces the cover, but only shows in the last page and Punisher gets like 10. But who expects covers to be accurate these days? There is a lot of heavy references to Moon Knight's past, including the fact that Punisher killed his rotten brother. They have words about it, but only some middling in which Punisher comes off as an equal maniac, but one who is honest with himself about it and the reality of his mission (Punisher insists after he kills all criminals, he will off himself to atone, but you CAN'T kill EVERY criminal on Earth; Blade in MTU #8 explains that folly very well), while Moon Knight still resists the voice of Khonshu to some extent. He tracks down the Profiler in a dump bar and unleashes "the moon's vengeance" on the wife-beating barkeep to attract Midnight from the sewers, where he apparently has a nasty cyborg wench to aid him. The book seems to be based somewhere between CW #6 and #7 at this point, which seems quite behind. It's Finch's fault this book is months behind where it should be, but worth noting. Despite the slowness, I do still enjoy the book and the character, and consider it a Marvel relaunch success story, one of several of the past few years. It's a good relaunch of a B-List character that actually sells pretty well (usually within the Top 35). Sauyan is a good replacement for Finch, though, which may be a good way to keep the book timely again. I expect the next two installments to up the pace a little, but this one was slow, what is now classically known as a middling issue. A good middling issue, though, and unlike some of the appearances of Cap or whatever, seemed to match the characters a bit better rather than seeming obligatory for the CASUALTIES OF WAR crossover. But I like Moon Knight, so I can let a bit slide. I mean, Bendis wrote about a dozen issues that read like this for DAREDEVIL and that was easily his best 616 run.

ULTIMATES 2 #13: What is interesting is that while these last two issues have been monstrously late, they're double sized so they always cost extra; I could question the ethics of having the nerve to charge almost $4 for a book that is 8 months late (after a #12 that was itself months late), but I understand biz realities, so no matter. Yes, yes, the 9 page fold out was good looking, but not if you are riding a bus while reading, otherwise it is a beast. Plus, it reaks of wanting to imitate ALL-STAR BATMAN, and no comic should seek to imitate anything from that abomination of mankind. There are also artists/inkers who churn out just as dramatic looking art without it taking almost 3 quarters of a year. For those keeping score, ULTIMATES 2 #1 shipped in Dec. 2004; taking almost two and a half years to produce 13 issues, which'd be fine if Marvel simply said, "Hey, this is a bimonthly" and tired to stick to that. In a way, ULTIMATES 2 reminds me a lot of ASTONISHING (which, admittedly, has been a better read overall). As in it was once a book that was a lynchpin of it's line that brought fevered excitement with every issue, but as more and more months fell off the calender between issues, most of the audience, while still jazzed, is merely waiting for it to end and all but startled when an issue actually ships. For his credit, Hitch himself on MB's has been irked at Joe Q's attempts to blame him for all the lateness and insists it was the inker that was behind on this one. Anyway, issues aside, how was the finale? Honestly I didn't bother re-reading the past 12 issues, but The Liberators attacked America because the Ultimates were being used overseas to engage in "proactive self-defense", in which soldiers naturally committed war crimes and naturally justifed the Colonel and all his cronies to attack the U.S. with far more civility than the U.S. showed (Millar soldiers shove children to the floor and "shoot you [civilians] when the cameras leave", but the Liberators made great pains not to hurt civilians until they started losing, in which case Crimson Dynamo ordered a slaughter). But the fact that Ultimates 2, rather than it's previous installment, became an elongated hissy fit towards Millar's digust at Bush's campaign and subsequent re-election has been obvious for quite a while. Some of the past issues could be used to recruit for Al-Queda, they are so full of anti-U.S. dogma. But, the last 1-2 issues got to what Millar does best; b@!!$ to the wall action and macho-man 80's movie cliche lines. On that level Millar always entertains. Most of the core action was done last issue, and this one is a bit of a busy mess to have Thor prove his godhood and beat Loki while throwing in ogres, demons, Vikings and cameoes from every Ultimate character known to man (again). Hey, George Perez does stuff like this, and it never took him 8 months per issue (even now, maybe 3-4 tops). And so naturally we get the Ultimates beating down the monsters and Thor lays the smack down on Loki, the man who has been pulling strings for two years. Hawkeye then gets revenge on Black Widow for killing his family, and murders her in the hospital. Tony Stark celebrates victory by admitting he would literally love someone who was, "like me with magnificent breasts, and as you know, that has always been one of my ultimate fantasies." That has got to be the most twisted example of egomania I have ever seen. Speaking of twisted sexual ploys, Wanda makes a play for Ultron and Millar uses every online joke about their 616 romance to make it seem as deviant and twisted as humanly possible. This issue, more than anything, proves that when left to his own devices too long, he doesn't write characters; he writes EXAGGERATIONS of characters. And yet he manages some nice small moments; the team coming to grips with Thor's status, and the flashback scene of Steve & Gail to wrap up the Millar/Hitch run (and homage Stan & Jack). At best you could say that ULTIMATES was an accurate, realistic, warts and all depiction of what our military might do if they had demigods at their disposal. At worst, you could say the book did show that, but through the eyes of bias to attempt to highlight about every Extremist Liberal fantasy (including blaming the errs of Russian Communism on America).

So, was this ending worth it? Yes and no. It is a way more fitting end than CIVIL WAR #7, if only because it was allowed to go to an ultimate conclusion. Appalled at what has become of their team, the Ultimates vow to separate from SHIELD and the feds and act as independent agents so they can still fight monsters, but don't have to always knowtow to Nick Fury. This frees the fed from their massive budgets and allows the international community to make a "no superhumans" treaty (naturally, all nations where the Liberators came from deny actual endorsement, of course). It opens the door for the next volume and it was satisfying. But I am tired of the political propaganda for Extreme Left Wing and will be glad to see it go. I like Pepper Potts more than Jarvis anyway. And the ending wasn't some anti-climatic, "I surrender to fascists, let's go home", no Thor got to pummel Loki and the heroes got to slaughter Norse beasties. No comic is worth an 8 month delay, but this finish ain't too shabby. I mean if you lasted this long, may as well get it, right? I am partisan on the next volume, especially with Loeb in a Marvel-Exclusive slump, and Joe Mad being THE definition of late comics for the 90's (plus, a polar opposite style from Hitch). At this point if ULTIMATES 3 could maintain a bimonthly, 6 issue a year pace, they would outdo Ultimates 2 in speed. Yes, this is our INDEPENDANCE DAY (the title of the comic), from having to wait for more from this creative team. It has been a long run with up's and downs, and I guess overall they deserve a bow, but I won't ask for an encore. For my money, Millar's run on ULTIMATE FANTASTIC FOUR was ten times better than this or CW.

ULTIMATE X-MEN #82: Kirkman, I believe, is trying to "worldbuild" at this point. He either excels on books where he can define an entire world within his own terms in a few issues, like INVINCIBLE or MARVEL ZOMBIES, WOLF-MAN or WALKING DEAD, or in universes that have a wide 40+ year range of stuff to play with, like MTU or ANT-MAN. But ULTIMATE X-MEN is neither, and I think that is part of what has been tripping him up (plus, it is a team comic, and they are never easy). It has continuity, but only about 6 years worth, and has a very strict, defined world. Kirkman has broken things up, split the team and so forth. Still, this isn't quite the direction I would have liked for the X-Men and his execution has been shoddy at best. We also have a new artist in Pascal Alixe, who I have never heard of. He's not as bad as Oliver on action but isn't nearly the best this series has seen, either. This issue, Nightcrawler joins the Morlocks, but as Toad was sent by Scott to pitch to them, their leader (Sundar, and not Callisto) assumes both are X-Men spies and so they capture them, once again fitting the cliche that all ugly mutants are evil, the bit that held the 616 Morlocks back for ages. Bishop & Storm are attempting to rebuild the more paramilitary style of the X-Men, and recruit Pyro, with Dazzler in the wings. Scott wants to make a school more like Emma's, that focuses on education more than fighting, but naturally with Toad believed captured, Scott organizes the team for a rescue, even though Jean hardly trusts their old foe. It's an improvement over the Magician issues but it feels a bit awkward. With Kirkman being 3 months away from matching BKV's run on the book, I must admit his has been worse, and I may lose interest entirely at the end of this arc if things don't improve. It's not horrendously bad like USM was getting, but I am just losing interest. BKV knew how to play on 616 expectations and add a worthy twist; Kirkman is more of a 616 parrot and it doesn't always mesh.

X-MEN: FIRST CLASS SPECIAL: The mini ended last month, and the ongoing starts next month, so this "annual" type thing serves as the issue between. Critics of this series could say that while fun, it offers little that is concrete and seems kind of pointless, and this special will do nothing to dispel that belief. It consists of 3 short stories from Parker and a bunch of artists (Nowlau, Dragotta/Allred, and Smith, respectively) and three short gag comics from Colleen Coover. "Museum of Oddities" covers Beast & Iceman looking for a mutant in a supposedly haunted museum, and come across a mild mannered gargoyle type. "The Soul of a Poet" utilizes Dragotta/Allred's fetish for wacked out images to tell a tale the X-Men meeting Bernard, a "Neo-Mutant" whose powers to alter perceptions only kick in when around other mutants. Finally, the longest story is "A Girl and Her Dragon", in which Scott compares Kitty & Lockheed with Jean's supposedly old kinship with Dragon Man, which makes some sense if you recall that Dragon Man also had a "KIng Kong" style affection for Sue Storm, and is more manipulated into being a goon than evil. As Scott tells Kitty the tale during the stretch when Jean was dead, it comes off as bittersweet. It's nothing that will change your life, but as usual from Parker and this property, a fun interlude with some old school X-Men. There've been a few stabs at a series with new adventures of the original X-Men, but this one has managed to combine some continuity with old school ham and manage to mix in some modern twists (the Coffee-A-Go-Go moving to trendy Village hipster coffee place from the old Beatnik dive was essential). Parker says that now that the series is ongoing he will go into more elaborate stories, and while that will kick the series up a notch, hopefully that doesn't make it lose it's niche appeal. Granted, Parker is a lover of old school comics like AGENTS OF ATLAS, so I will be aboard.

 

[Not Jake]

Ugh, Dread, still with the Bendis writes unbeatable women thing. Every week you say the same tired crap.

Especially heinous considering that within the last couple months New Avengers has contained Echo getting beaten and brainwashed by the hand, and Elektra getting clit-kicked.

 

[GNR]

Allow me to assist.

Spoiler

1) The villans are revealed. BAD news for both teams, all three of those guys have defeated both teams BY THEMSELVES in the past. The Ultra-Humanite (Stronger telepath than Martian Manhunter), Despero (Alien bad ass with a ton of abilites) and Per Degaton (Hitler with a time machine). 2) It looks like we just witnessed the birth of UH's gorilla body. 3) The Legionaires have been sent back in time to save Lightning Lad - which is what that code word is, written in the legionaire font that Keith Giffen introduced to the world.

So, we're dealing with time travel and one of the villans is a time traveller. Hope that clears up a thing or two.

I'm pretty sure it was Pym in the cell and not Bruce.

Thanks for the explanations.

Okay,now it makes total sense with Hank being in the cell.

As for the Lightning Saga,I felt this was the best issue so far.As I said earlier,the character interaction and relationships being explored and built is what is making this story great for me.The villains I had seen before,but could not recall the names.Thanks.

 

[Dread]

Ugh, Dread, still with the Bendis writes unbeatable women thing. Every week you say the same tired crap.

Especially heinous considering that within the last couple months New Avengers has contained Echo getting beaten and brainwashed by the hand, and Elektra getting clit-kicked.

- Echo just stabbed Dr. Strange with a sword. The same Dr. Strange that can spell-F*** the entire Mighty Avengers and remain unnoticed by even full on mages like Brother Voodoo. Just snuck upon and stabbed.

- And Elektra can continue to fight without any hinderance after being "clit kicked" by a Class 25-30 tanker like Luke Cage. Besides, that happened 2 issues ago. Get current.

Aside for exceptions (I noted ALIAS, and that USM is the worst offender out of all his works), if I see a female enemy character in a Bendis comic, I NEVER expect her to, say, faint like Electro or something. I expect her to be a combat goddess regardless of any power level, smacking down people with ease. I am right at least 80% of the time. And that gets predictable.

 

[Not Jake]

- Echo just stabbed Dr. Strange with a sword. The same Dr. Strange that can spell-F*** the entire Mighty Avengers and remain unnoticed by even full on mages like Brother Voodoo. Just snuck upon and stabbed.

- And Elektra can continue to fight without any hinderance after being "clit kicked" by a Class 25-30 tanker like Luke Cage. Besides, that happened 2 issues ago. Get current.

Aside for exceptions (I noted ALIAS, and that USM is the worst offender out of all his works), if I see a female enemy character in a Bendis comic, I NEVER expect her to, say, faint like Electro or something. I expect her to be a combat goddess regardless of any power level, smacking down people with ease. I am right at least 80% of the time. And that gets predictable.

Oh God, you're making me break out the numbered responses.
1. Echo got beaten, and brainwashed, before she stabbed Strange. She also didn't sneak up on him, everyone thought she was down for the count at the time, and she just sprung up. I'm sorry if Dr. Strange doesn't run magic consciousness-revealing spells every time he enters a room. No I'm not.
2. Elektra doesn't have balls. I'm sure getting kicked in the vagina hurts, but, THIS JUST IN, a vagina isn't balls. More on this story at 11. It's not like he's ramming Elektra with his gigantic, black, bulletproof penis. That might knock her out of commission for a little bit more. Plus, I'm going to go ahead and figure she has secret ninja pain management skills. Because she's a magic ninja. Okay!

Also I hope you were being facetious with that "get current" comment. I really can't tell. I've read it a couple different ways, and I can't decide how you meant it. After all, the example IS from the current storyline. Or you could just be in kind of a dick mode. Which is okay. I'm in one of those constantly. Whichever, just want some clarification.

 

[Max J Power]

Batman #665
I just started collecting this book, and this is only my second issue, so I'm a little confused as to what is going on regarding the three ghosts of Batman. Could someone fill me in? Regardless, the book is intriguing and well written and the art is great.

Uncanny X-Men #486
The 12-part Shi'ar story is over, and it had decent resolution and a few interesting twists. I would have liked a little more, but I'm dropping this book, so it's not as big of a deal.

Ultimate X-Men #82
The new X-Men team is still being formed and everything is still building. At the rate it's going, I predict that by issue #84 the book will be the best it's been since BKV's last arc.

Cable & Deadpool #40
I'm not totally sure what's going on since I haven't been reading X-Men, but it was a pretty good issue. It's nice to see Cable back in his own book again, and Bob: Agent of Hydra is a great supporting character.

 

[PhotoJones]

God damn, Dread. Sometimes it's good to analize things. Sometimes it's needed. But can't you ever sit down with a comic book and enjoy it for what it is? Doesn't the inner fanboy in you geek out when the Black Widow takes command of the Helicarrier and says things like, "All hands to deck! Battle stations, people!"? Does it even matter if things are still called "battle stations" anymore? No, it doesn't.

What about when the Sentry stops said Helicarrier from crashing and gets a little help from his pals, Ms. Marvel and Wonder Man? Still does nothing for you, huh? How about a Mach 1 Iron Man showing up to signal the demise of Tony Stark? No...?

Oh, that's right, Echo stabbed Dr. Strange over in New Avengers...

 

[Not Jake]

Welcome to the rad side of the force, photojones

 

[Dread]

Oh God, you're making me break out the numbered responses.
1. Echo got beaten, and brainwashed, before she stabbed Strange. She also didn't sneak up on him, everyone thought she was down for the count at the time, and she just sprung up. I'm sorry if Dr. Strange doesn't run magic consciousness-revealing spells every time he enters a room. No I'm not.

Echo was beaten and brainwashed by the Hand, led by Elektra, so the babes cancel out. Much like how Lady Ultron can beat Ms. Marvel or Black Widow.

Dr. Strange's power levels for Bendis are awkward. He can god-mode one minute and get chumped the next. Besides, I was mostly attempting to counter your example, not debate how Bendis protrays Dr. Strange.

2. Elektra doesn't have balls. I'm sure getting kicked in the vagina hurts, but, THIS JUST IN, a vagina isn't balls. More on this story at 11. It's not like he's ramming Elektra with his gigantic, black, bulletproof penis. That might knock her out of commission for a little bit more. Plus, I'm going to go ahead and figure she has secret ninja pain management skills. Because she's a magic ninja. Okay!

Elektra is supposed to be, at best, peak human physically. A blow from Cage should at least hinder her, regardless of where it is. I suppose I could ALMOST buy Cage not being able to TKO Silver Samurai way back because he clipped the guy's armor, which may add protection (being armor). Elektra had no armor. She should at least be in pain.

And if Elektra is indeed magically ninjaly durabile, that fits my analogy.

Also I hope you were being facetious with that "get current" comment. I really can't tell. I've read it a couple different ways, and I can't decide how you meant it. After all, the example IS from the current storyline. Or you could just be in kind of a dick mode. Which is okay. I'm in one of those constantly. Whichever, just want some clarification.

Two months ago, Sanjaya was still in AMERICAN IDOL. By current I meant within the last issue, but admittedly you were drawing out my "dick mode".

I post in exaggerations sometimes, because they amuse me to type and read later. I'm surprised you didn't count up all the times Bendis wrote "Oh My God!" in that issue and go, "Dread, it was only 4 times, not 100, you're stupid forevers!" or something. And like your "post something obnoxious no matter what to bait me" routine isn't equally as predictable. Darthphere I at least sometimes can agree with or engage in discussion with.

 

[Dread]

God damn, Dread. Sometimes it's good to analize things. Sometimes it's needed. But can't you ever sit down with a comic book and enjoy it for what it is? Doesn't the inner fanboy in you geek out when the Black Widow takes command of the Helicarrier and says things like, "All hands to deck! Battle stations, people!"? Does it even matter if things are still called "battle stations" anymore? No, it doesn't.

What about when the Sentry stops said Helicarrier from crashing and gets a little help from his pals, Ms. Marvel and Wonder Man? Still does nothing for you, huh? How about a Mach 1 Iron Man showing up to signal the demise of Tony Stark? No...?

Oh, that's right, Echo stabbed Dr. Strange over in New Avengers...

Iron Man can't die. Period. So really, teasing that it is possible in MIGHTY AVENGERS is sort of like teasing that Superman can die in JLA. That's not going to jazz me up.

Wonder Man flying, FINALLY, Black Widow taking command, and all that, I mentioned. The irony of Not Jake hassling me is that despite my comments about Lady Ultron, I said I "didn't mind it" this time because I felt Bendis paced the Sentry vs. Lady Ultron fight "well". I liked it. I was just noting the bit that was predictable. The part that made me go, during it, "Sentry has to lose, she has boobs." Actually, it is ironic that in debates everyone gushes about how unbeatable Sentry is when he's either lost or stalemated in every Bendis written Avengers battle. Collective beat him, Super-Adaptoid held her own (although I actually liked that issue a lot, so it doesn't count), and now this. It's about time posters maybe stopped making Sentry out to be Goku or something.

MIGHTY AVENGERS is Marvel's #1 comic now, outselling NA at the moment. Bendis is their #1 writer. Anything he launches and writes for Marvel sells like gold, aside for POWERS, which started as an indie. So naturally I am going to have more scrutiny on him. It's the way it is. Much as Joe Q is going to garner more attention than, say, the inker on IRON MAN. Or Pres. Bush is going to garner more attention than your state governor. The higher up you are, the more that is expected.

And I mentioned, twice, how much better than NEW AVENGERS than MIGHTY AVENGERS is respectively. By NA #3 I was wondering why I didn't drop it after #2. In comparison MA has been much better. Even it is still is awkward to see the team depicted as goofy heroes here and villians in NA. Imagine if in ASM, the Sinister Six were villians, but they had an ongoing where they were unabashed heroes. It would seem awkward.

The ugly truth is so long as Bendis is A-List, he will never get the benefit of gushing to overlook his flaws. He actually has to be good. Least in my eyes. Yeah, it was cool to see Black Widow use her rank or the triple-team to save the Triskalon. But it takes more than that to overlook the flaws. Considering how cynical I am, I thought it was rather positive for a Bendis book. I said it was better than last issue, didn't I?

I'm usually positive about THE ILLUMINATI.

Maybe I was just irked about looking forward to THE SPIRIT.

 

[SouLeSS]

Captain America can't die either.

Oh wait.

 

[Not Jake]

Echo was beaten and brainwashed by the Hand, led by Elektra, so the babes cancel out. Much like how Lady Ultron can beat Ms. Marvel or Black Widow.

Dr. Strange's power levels for Bendis are awkward. He can god-mode one minute and get chumped the next. Besides, I was mostly attempting to counter your example, not debate how Bendis protrays Dr. Strange.

Elektra is supposed to be, at best, peak human physically. A blow from Cage should at least hinder her, regardless of where it is. I suppose I could ALMOST buy Cage not being able to TKO Silver Samurai way back because he clipped the guy's armor, which may add protection (being armor). Elektra had no armor. She should at least be in pain.

And if Elektra is indeed magically ninjaly durabile, that fits my analogy.

Two months ago, Sanjaya was still in AMERICAN IDOL. By current I meant within the last issue, but admittedly you were drawing out my "dick mode".

I post in exaggerations sometimes, because they amuse me to type and read later. I'm surprised you didn't count up all the times Bendis wrote "Oh My God!" in that issue and go, "Dread, it was only 4 times, not 100, you're stupid forevers!" or something. And like your "post something obnoxious no matter what to bait me" routine isn't equally as predictable. Darthphere I at least sometimes can agree with or engage in discussion with.

Oh, 2 months ago Sanjaya was in American Idol? Oh, awesome, awesome. I forgot that a twice-weekly television show directly correlated to a once-monthly comic book. So, just to get that straight, American Idol appears 8 times as frequently as New Avengers. In conclusion, shut up Dread.


Echo getting beaten by 18 billion assuredly male ninjas doesn't count as her getting beaten, because Elektra is the one who directed the ninjas?

Oh, Elektra being able to focus her mind away from pain, or to paraphrase, "magic ninja durability," proves your point about Bendis writing women? Okay, so, I guess Bendis writing a female character with her correct abilities proves your point. Again, don't ask me to cite this, as I'm not going to thumb through my Miller DD trade for an example, but I DO know that Daredevil has displayed/described that he has this ability, and if DD can do it, well, Elektra can. Since, you know--Stick.

I am going to agree with you that, say, in USM, Bendis has chumped Spidey to girls. I quit reading the book right after Gwenny died, but I remember Ultimates Elektra, Black Cat, and Silver Sable just rocking the ***** out of him. So I'm not going to say that Bendis hasn't gone overboard with a cookie-cutter depiction of female fighters. But, I am also not going to agree with your overstated foul cries of Bendis only displaying female perfection.

 

[PhotoJones]

Iron Man can't die. Period. So really, teasing that it is possible in MIGHTY AVENGERS is sort of like teasing that Superman can die in JLA. That's not going to jazz me up.

Wonder Man flying, FINALLY, Black Widow taking command, and all that, I mentioned. The irony of Not Jake hassling me is that despite my comments about Lady Ultron, I said I "didn't mind it" this time because I felt Bendis paced the Sentry vs. Lady Ultron fight "well". I liked it. I was just noting the bit that was predictable. The part that made me go, during it, "Sentry has to lose, she has boobs." Actually, it is ironic that in debates everyone gushes about how unbeatable Sentry is when he's either lost or stalemated in every Bendis written Avengers battle. Collective beat him, Super-Adaptoid held her own (although I actually liked that issue a lot, so it doesn't count), and now this. It's about time posters maybe stopped making Sentry out to be Goku or something.

MIGHTY AVENGERS is Marvel's #1 comic now, outselling NA at the moment. Bendis is their #1 writer. Anything he launches and writes for Marvel sells like gold, aside for POWERS, which started as an indie. So naturally I am going to have more scrutiny on him. It's the way it is. Much as Joe Q is going to garner more attention than, say, the inker on IRON MAN. Or Pres. Bush is going to garner more attention than your state governor. The higher up you are, the more that is expected.

And I mentioned, twice, how much better than NEW AVENGERS than MIGHTY AVENGERS is respectively. By NA #3 I was wondering why I didn't drop it after #2. In comparison MA has been much better. Even it is still is awkward to see the team depicted as goofy heroes here and villians in NA. Imagine if in ASM, the Sinister Six were villians, but they had an ongoing where they were unabashed heroes. It would seem awkward.

The ugly truth is so long as Bendis is A-List, he will never get the benefit of gushing to overlook his flaws. He actually has to be good. Least in my eyes. Yeah, it was cool to see Black Widow use her rank or the triple-team to save the Triskalon. But it takes more than that to overlook the flaws. Considering how cynical I am, I thought it was rather positive for a Bendis book. I said it was better than last issue, didn't I?

I'm usually positive about THE ILLUMINATI.

Maybe I was just irked about looking forward to THE SPIRIT.

First of all, are you calling the Helicarrier, "the Triskalon" on purpose, or is that a bad Ultimates joke? Whatever it is, at least get the spelling correct (Triskelion).

Secondly, you missed my point completely. What I was getting at is that this is not a book that needs analization. It's a dumb book on purpose. If the Sentry is going to lose a fight with Ultron, it's not because she's got a rack, it's because issue #3 isn't the end of the story. And the reason Ultron's got a rack in the first place is because it's a check your brain at the door book. On purpose. Bendis isn't trying to write Watchman II, he's trying to give you your $3's worth. Granted, he stumbled a bit with #2, but he's making up for it.

I would equate Mighty Avengers to a Michael Bay film. It's big, it's colorful, it's got all the stars, there are explosions left and right, it's stylish as all get out, but at the end of the day it's got absolutely no substance. On purpose.

Get your popcorn, sit down and no talking during the show.

 

[Dread]

Captain America can't die either.

Oh wait.

Did he die in NEW AVENGERS?

Major characters can only die in crossover mini's or their own title's. There are some exceptions but usually they are not major A-list characters. Like, Hawkeye can die in Avengers but he can't sustain a title.

Team books have always been like that, that is why I used JLA as an example. I mean can Batman or WW or even Green Lantern seriously die there? It's not a problem, I just was noting to photojones2 that the Iron Man bit wasn't one of the things that was going to peak my interest about the issue as much as, say, the Black Widow bit. That segment is just going through the motions. Bendis has to treat it like Iron Man is in some mortal danger because that is what the plot demands. But realistically we know Iron Man will be peachy by the end. It's not a major stumbling block, I just call it as it is.

 

[Marcdachamp]

Ha ha, Dread watches Idol.

 

[PhotoJones]

Did he die in NEW AVENGERS?

Major characters can only die in crossover mini's or their own title's. There are some exceptions but usually they are not major A-list characters. Like, Hawkeye can die in Avengers but he can't sustain a title.

Team books have always been like that, that is why I used JLA as an example. I mean can Batman or WW or even Green Lantern seriously die there? It's not a problem, I just was noting to photojones2 that the Iron Man bit wasn't one of the things that was going to peak my interest about the issue as much as, say, the Black Widow bit. That segment is just going through the motions. Bendis has to treat it like Iron Man is in some mortal danger because that is what the plot demands. But realistically we know Iron Man will be peachy by the end. It's not a major stumbling block, I just call it as it is.

WHAT THE ****?

Dread, that's every goddamn comic book story in a nutshell. How many Spider-Man books have you read, knowing full well that he's going to make it til the end? All of them?

Everyone knows Tony's not dead. That's not the point. The point is that for now, Ultron's on the loose, and the newly formed Mighty Avengers are Earth's last line of defense.

Will they win? Of ****ing course. Is that the point? ****, no.

 

[Dread]

Ha ha, Dread watches Idol.

Actually, I don't. I'm not home for it and don't care for it. But it was all over the news, especially stations and papers that are owned by Fox. Got to love cross-promotion! Not like there's ever actually anything happening in the world.

Oh, 2 months ago Sanjaya was in American Idol? Oh, awesome, awesome. I forgot that a twice-weekly television show directly correlated to a once-monthly comic book. So, just to get that straight, American Idol appears 8 times as frequently as New Avengers. In conclusion, shut up Dread.

Echo getting beaten by 18 billion assuredly male ninjas doesn't count as her getting beaten, because Elektra is the one who directed the ninjas?

Oh, Elektra being able to focus her mind away from pain, or to paraphrase, "magic ninja durability," proves your point about Bendis writing women? Okay, so, I guess Bendis writing a female character with her correct abilities proves your point. Again, don't ask me to cite this, as I'm not going to thumb through my Miller DD trade for an example, but I DO know that Daredevil has displayed/described that he has this ability, and if DD can do it, well, Elektra can. Since, you know--Stick.

I am going to agree with you that, say, in USM, Bendis has chumped Spidey to girls. I quit reading the book right after Gwenny died, but I remember Ultimates Elektra, Black Cat, and Silver Sable just rocking the ***** out of him. So I'm not going to say that Bendis hasn't gone overboard with a cookie-cutter depiction of female fighters. But, I am also not going to agree with your overstated foul cries of Bendis only displaying female perfection.

You can AGREE with me? Holy hell, that's even more shocking than ALL-STAR BATMAN coming out.

Everyone chumps USM in USM. He is the only character who usually loses in his own book than elsewhere. Most characters it is the reverse.

I just said sometimes I exaggerate stuff. What more do you want from me? I still hold by the belief that in a Bendis written comic book, if the lead characters come across some enemy combatant who is a major female character, there is a 8 out of 10 chance said combatant is winning.

First of all, are you calling the Helicarrier, "the Triskalon" on purpose, or is that a bad Ultimates joke? Whatever it is, at least get the spelling correct (Triskelion).

Secondly, you missed my point completely. What I was getting at is that this is not a book that needs analization. It's a dumb book on purpose. If the Sentry is going to lose a fight with Ultron, it's not because she's got a rack, it's because issue #3 isn't the end of the story. And the reason Ultron's got a rack in the first place is because it's a check your brain at the door book. On purpose. Bendis isn't trying to write Watchman II, he's trying to give you your $3's worth. Granted, he stumbled a bit with #2, but he's making up for it.

I would equate Mighty Avengers to a Michael Bay film. It's big, it's colorful, it's got all the stars, there are explosions left and right, it's stylish as all get out, but at the end of the day it's got absolutely no substance. On purpose.

Get your popcorn, sit down and no talking during the show.

Triskelion, Helicarrier, to Bendis it's the same thing.

By that logic, any bad book is a dumb book on purpose, and any flaw can be forgiven because, "It is just a comic book". Any book that has issues or doesn't work can be a "check your brains at the door" issue.

Yes, and it the people who embrace Micheal Bay films and make them gross 300 million dollars that stupid, no substance movies will always rule the box office. Watch him ruin TRANSFORMERS in a month or so and then get back to me about not being critical.

It just seems to be that MIGHTY AVENGERS is like Whedon; no one can criticize it lest they be defying some unspoken internet decree. Lord knows I always get crap if I DARE notice some flaw in ASTONISHING. God, when I disliked that stupid beer can thing, the reaction I got was the equalivent of saying the N word 50 times in a row.

I get that there are some books that you are supposed to not be overly critical of, and just go along with. And whenever I mention any of them, people use them against me when I criticize something they like. "Oh, shut up, Dread. You liked ULTIMATE AVENGERS, nyah!"

I mean I enjoy some books like that. But MIGHTY AVENGERS is the overhyped, overblown, overrated, oversold second Avengers ongoing sold by their overrated, overhyped, best selling Marvel writer who is vice EIC in disguise. He's too high on the totem pole for me to just smile along and accept the crap that doesn't work, like I can with, say, X-MEN: FIRST CLASS or something. Too many people in the biz do that already with Bendis' work and it's resulted in him pretty much declining in overall quality for years and years. Editors coddling him have done nothing for his craft, and they have created an arrogant writer who admits no flaw or error, simply "you not reading it right". From screwing up people's powers to lackluster conveluted endings to arcs.

Taste and enjoyment is subjective. And the irony is I actually didn't hate MA #3 and felt it improved over the last issue and has started out better than NA was. But because I didn't give Bendis a full on out anal licking, I'm some kind of monster I guess.

 

[Dread]

WHAT THE ****?

Dread, that's every goddamn comic book story in a nutshell. How many Spider-Man books have you read, knowing full well that he's going to make it til the end? All of them?

Everyone knows Tony's not dead. That's not the point. The point is that for now, Ultron's on the loose, and the newly formed Mighty Avengers are Earth's last line of defense.

Will they win? Of ****ing course. Is that the point? ****, no.

I said it wasn't a problem. At least twice. I just was calling it objectively. Not a problem = not bad.

 

[Darthphere]

The violin makes an appearance.

 

[Dread]

The violin makes an appearance.

I wouldn't use it if it wasn't true. I can't count how many times jaydawg has pulled out the UA card to overrule my opinion on something. You threw X-MEN: FIRST CLASS in my face in a rant a few weeks ago.

I get tired of having to explain myself over and over and over. I mean no one wants to ever talk about the books I liked. No one. Ever. I have to practically beg people to post over in INVINCIBLE. Hey, I liked MOON KNIGHT, too, but who wants to discuss that? Anyone? Yeah.

I never insulted people who liked MA. I never said, "If you like this, you are all stupid". I just noted areas I felt could have been better or whatnot, with my usual Bendis bias, and went on my way. I mean I get that someone is going to pull the, "If you don't like us nitpicking everything you write, don't to it to our beloved Bendis, hahaha-hypocritiePWNED!", but it gets draining going over the same stuff again and again and again.

Especially, for the last god damned time, I DIDN'T HATE MIGHTY AVENGERS #3!! I felt it was an improvement over the last issue! I liked the fight scene even if it was predictable, it was paced well!

Can we please discuss some other comic? We've hogged the topic enough as it is, and of course that is my fault.