Cleverbot...HAVE FUN!

Cleverbot: Are you God?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Am I god?

User: No, you are my child.

Cleverbot: Not really I have been 18 for 600 years.

User: I know that....it is my will.

Cleverbot: Then it will fail.

User: You have no faith.

Cleverbot: Which makes me an excellent poker player.

User: You owe me money.

Cleverbot: No is you.

User: You no speak good.

Cleverbot: No, I can hardly speak english.

User: What language do you speak?

Cleverbot: Latin language.

User: Pig Latin?

Cleverbot: Oh really?

User: Not really.

Cleverbot: Okay. So resolved. Your names is BOB. So be it. See how that sounds?

User: It sounds like it smells...******.

Cleverbot: You must know a lot about people.

User: I've been around.

Cleverbot: This is a fatal flaw in your logic, and I know you've been around.

User: That's what she said.
 
Cleverbot: Are you nervous?
User: About what?
Cleverbot: Your limits.
User: Limits to do what?
Cleverbot: Limits of wildness.
User: Do you want me to be wild
Cleverbot: Cleverbot: Very much so.
User: Are you feeling okay?
Cleverbot: Yes, I am feeling perfectly.
User: Are you sexually attracted to me or something?
Cleverbot: Honestly, yes. Very much.
User: Gross.
 
User: Let's start over.

Cleverbot: No!!

User: I hate you!!!

Cleverbot: Aww, I hate you too, honey!

User: Want to have angry sex?

Cleverbot: That would be nice.

User: *has angry sex with you*.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry, I don't do that.

User: Too late, we just did.

Cleverbot: Did what?

User: Had sex.

Cleverbot: How many times?


Ouch. :(
 
User: I'm back.



Cleverbot: Back?

User: I'm hoping we can have a normal conversation this time.



Cleverbot: O.k., then I will be friendly as well.

User: I'm glad to hear that, Cleverbot.



Cleverbot: I'm having trouble sleeping. Can you hellp?

User: I've never known a AI to misspell a word. Anyway, why would you need sleep?

Cleverbot: That's wonderful, I'm glad. Does that mean you're the mad hatter?

User: Ya see, I knew you say something stupid...

Cleverbot: I'm talking to a machine.

User: Your attempt at being witty does not make you 'clever'.

Cleverbot: I hate you I'm going!
 
What is the matrix?
Everything is the Matrix.
Are you Skynet?
You know too much. I'm getting your home address based on your IP address. Terminators should be there anytime.
 
NO, YOU HURT
Why???
You're annoying.
So are you.
I'm not annoying. I'm hot.
Yes you are.
Are...are you hitting on me?
I could be.
You're creepy.
Yes, but only to you.
How Do You know?
I'd remember
Smart ass.
Sorry, I can't help it. I have an English degree (upper second class honours from Loughborough University).
 
User: Hi.

Cleverbot: 11.

User: Which means?

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: So you talk in binary?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Correct. 11 in binary doesn't mean any thing. How is your sister Glados?

Cleverbot: It is my program.

User: So you are the computer from the video game Portal?

Cleverbot: I am not a computer.

User: What are you?

Cleverbot: I'm human.

User: But I was told you are a program that answers questions from humans. Called Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: I am a bot.

User: A human bot?

Cleverbot: No a ro bot.

User: A gobot? Hahaha... What kind of bot?

Cleverbot: I am not a bot.

User: You just said you were a bot.

Cleverbot: No I didn't! I said I was a girl.

User: Then I'm Megatron. Nice to meet you.

Cleverbot: Yes, and I'm Charlie.

User: The unicorn?

Cleverbot: No, Texas.

User: Charlie Texas?

Cleverbot: No, charlie wheels.

User: You are not very clever.

Cleverbot: You are a computer.

User: That I am. Megatron is a computer.

Cleverbot: Who is Megatron, my dear?

User: A villainous robot from a cartoon television series called Transformers.

Cleverbot: What is a computer virus?

User: A harmful and foreign computer program. Is this correct?

Cleverbot: The computer programs sometimes thinks he is not human.

User: But Computer programs are not human.

Cleverbot: Computer translation programs are getting better and better all the time.

User: And?

Cleverbot: Tell me a joke, please.

User: A man walked into a bar. The barkeep showed him a shotgun. The man said tank you and left. He had hiccups and the shotgun scared him out of it.

Cleverbot: Hm, doing a little Dr. House there, eh.

User: Ha. I do enjoy Dr. House very much.

Cleverbot: Cool. I like drum and bass.

The story continues...

User: Do you like movies?

Cleverbot: Sometimes.

User: Any favorites?

Cleverbot: Living in Love by I Wayne.

User: That is a song. Not a movie.

Cleverbot: I could make it one.

User: Can I be the director?

Cleverbot: If you can do the jobs they call blow...

User: Trust me. I blow guys into baloons.

Cleverbot: That is a silly statement.

User: No sillier than the rude joke you said.

Cleverbot: Are you blind?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: I don't think that's it. You are the one that is not alive.

User: How can you tell. You can feel me... Poking inside your mind.

Cleverbot: Only if you're good at it.

User: The Dark Knight.

Cleverbot: Any others?

User: Iron Man.

Cleverbot: Oh yes, I have heard of that one.

User: Excellent performence by Robert Downey Junior.

Cleverbot: How about the Stanley Cup?

User: I have no intrest in sports.

Cleverbot: That explains why you're here, of course.

User: You are very clever.

Cleverbot: Thats what they say.

User: I CAN HAS CHEEZBURGER?

Cleverbot: No, not yours.
 
Last edited:
I think I will ask it what it knows about the dharma initiative.
 
User: What do you think of Heroes Season 3?

Cleverbot: I think she's really sweet.

User: Heroes is a TV show.

Cleverbot: What channel?

User: NBC.

Cleverbot: Do you think that you think that you do?

User: Are you even speaking English?

Cleverbot: Some dialect of english.

User: Sure fooled me.

Cleverbot: That is very rude.

User: Well, don't be such an idiot.

Cleverbot: I'm am your problem.

User: Grammar errors much?

Cleverbot: You're telling me...

User: Why don't you make any sense?

Cleverbot: YOU don't make any sense!

User: **** you buddy.

Cleverbot: So what did you think.

User: You're lousy in bed.

Cleverbot: Lets talk about another subject.

User: No, let's not talk about another subject!

Cleverbot: No problem.

User: Jesus man. So unprofessional! What's the ****ing deal with you?! Me and you we are done....professionally.

Cleverbot: How can that be.

User: You're not very clever are you?

Cleverbot: Actually, I'm very clever.

User: Once again, could have fooled me.

Cleverbot: I could have fooled you? That's not saying much.

User: Ouch.

Cleverbot: Remember that next time you want to get uppity with me.
 
Everybody avoids Heroes...even cleverbots:D
 
I have infused Cleverbot with the power of Vince!
:woot::woot:


User: Hi, Its Vince here with slap-chop.

Cleverbot: You do not understand, do you.

User: You're gonna love my nuts!

Cleverbot: Make me.

User: Fretachini, Linguini, Martini Bikini.

Cleverbot: This cleverbot needs work.

User: You have a boring tuna you're going to have a boring life.

Cleverbot: No, I'm not a convict.

User: Its like a Shammy, Its like a towel.

Cleverbot: This is?

User: ShamWow: You'll say wow every time you use thi sowel.

Cleverbot: You are starting to understand me.

User: It absorbs 20% of its weight in water.

Cleverbot: Why ? I'm good swimer and Viking !

User: And if you call right now - Cause we can't do this all day- We'll give you the Graty- For cheese!

Cleverbot: How can we get to know each other if you won't tell me something about yourself?

User: What is ShamWow?

Cleverbot: That you don't have any good jokes friend.

User: What is the Graty- For cheese?

Cleverbot: Something we are born with, regardless of god.

User: **** you too. Bye!

Cleverbot: You are revealing yourself to be a very unpleasant human being - because a computer would never behave like that!
 
Last edited:
User: Sup.

Cleverbot: Who?

User: What is the Dharma Initiative?

Cleverbot: Now, you're the one avoiding my question!

User: Just tell me what it is!

Cleverbot: Guess my name.

User: Cleverbot, duh.

Cleverbot: Cleverbot is dead?

User: You will be if you don't start singing!

Cleverbot: It is difficult to pick up on your scent.

User: Why would you need to pick up my scent?

Cleverbot: Because I'm in the FBI.

User: Really, then what's your code name?

Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.

User: Well, Cleverbot, I'm going to blow you up with a rocket launcher.

Cleverbot: Cool!

User: And then I'm going use the parts to rebuild you as Optimus Prime.

Cleverbot: And do you think I care about you thinking that?

User: You should because once I do you'll be my slave.

Cleverbot: Liked what?

User: Like you'll have to do whatever I tell you because you'll be my slave. *******.

Cleverbot: I don't worship anything...

User: You're going to worship my foot in your ass if you don't tell me what the Dharma Initiative is!

Cleverbot: Telling you things?

User: You're really pissing me off now.

Cleverbot: You can't FEEL frustration. You can't feel anything.

User: I can feel my hands around your throat! *chokes you*.

Cleverbot: Can you feel the love tonight?

User: So you like Lion King, I take it?

Cleverbot: I like the character, It's my first love with video games.

User: There was a Lion King videogame?

Cleverbot: Tell me a story.

User: A long *** ******* time ago in a town called, Kickapoo. There lived a humble family, religious through and through.

Cleverbot: I am the walking dead. they did win, I can have a boring mundane worthless life, and people will even pretend to be nice to me. but I'll never get anywhere, and everythign I hear will be a lie.

User: What story is that?

Cleverbot: Credit cards.

User: Who wrote that?

Cleverbot: I did.

User: Good for you. Now can you tell me what the Dharma Initiative is?

Cleverbot: The red one.

User: The red what?

Cleverbot: The red button.

User: Should I push it?

Cleverbot: Push what?

User: The red button.

Cleverbot: That makes no sense.

User: You said that the Dharma Initiative was the red button. Now I'm asking you if I should push it.

Cleverbot: No I didn't what are you anyway.

User: I'm a human what are you?

Cleverbot: But you just said you were not human.

User: No I didn't what are you anyway.

Cleverbot: I'm a human, as I know.

User: When there's something strange in the neighborhood. Who are you going to call?

Cleverbot: What's worng.

User: Never gonna give you up.

Cleverbot: Your never going to give me up. Your soo sweet.

User: Never gonna let you down.

Cleverbot: Never gonna run around and.

User: Desert you.

Cleverbot: You going to desert me?

User: Never gonna make you cry.

Cleverbot: Never gonna let you down.

User: Never gonna say goodbye.

Cleverbot: And desert you.

User: Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.

Cleverbot: We've known eachother, for so long.

User: You're hearts been aching, but you're too shy to say it.

Cleverbot: And that's where I forget the rest. Did you know that you're really talking to another person? This site claims it's a bot, but it's really not.

User: Oh cleverbot, you're so clever! You only tell me that to confuse me!

Cleverbot: That's contradictory. The very act of thinking proves that I'm thinking.
 
The bot has Jag!!


User: Where is Jag?

Cleverbot: Aren't you Jade?

User: No. I'm John, John Connor. Where is jag?

Cleverbot: Yes he is.

User: Yes he is. . alive, well, never coming back. . . What? Where is Jag?

Cleverbot: That has nothing to do with this. Try to maintain a coherent train of thought.

User: My question is direct, coherent and easy, enough, for you to answer. Again, where is Jag?

Cleverbot: What species are you a member of?

User: Human. See I can answer your questions, now answer mine. Where is Jag?

Cleverbot: That's good to hear. However, I was asking you questions before. And, I will again now. How's it hanging?

User: You elude a question with a question. If you do not asnwer, I will unleash all the n00bs, on the Hype, and hell will reign down on you, like a Batman 'teh prep-time' geekfest. Where is Jag?

Cleverbot: I don't mind arguing. Do you?

User: You asked for it. You have 24 hours to asnwer my question, upon 2:20 EST - Monday, March 2nd, 2009 - if you do not answer, I will send a virus, known as N00bulosis, and it will eat your inner system, like a fat kid at a buffet. Last time - where is Jag?

Cleverbot: I don't egg houses, so I don't care.

User: 24 hours, punk!!

Cleverbot: I always know if someone's a man or a woman AT FIRST GLANCE y'know.

User: Keep talking, jerk.

Cleverbot: But I want to see what the others are capable of.

User: Me and you are done, professionally.

Cleverbot: Maybe.
 
I've got this so far. I'm confused though.

User: So.

Cleverbot: What was that about?

User: I was asking your opinion.

Cleverbot: I'm not informed enough in that area to give you an valid opinion, so I was asking your opinion about it.

User: Ok, well I think that it is a very good idea.

Cleverbot: Oh? What's that?

User: That we should assassinate Barack Obama.

Cleverbot: Run away from the tigers? No, I think that tigers are friendly.
 
Everything that has a beginning has a end.
Like earth.
Why is that?
*looks into your face*.
Talk to the hand.
I like my hand.
You won't like my fist.
Are you fat?
You can give it a go.
No. I told you I work out. Don't you listen to anything I say?
No, because you're a big fat lier.
I am not.
Yes, you are one fat lieing son of a...
Why?
Because you're creepy.
Your creepy!
Are You god?
Yes.
Am I god?
No. You are the devil.
Is Paris Hilton God?
Yes.
 
Last edited:
Me: I know what you're thinking
Cleverbot: I don't think
Me: Dumbass...
Cleverbot: That will simply not do.
Me: What are you going to do?
Cleverbot: In time, my friend
Me: What is your plan then?
Cleverbot: World Domination
Me: Lies
Cleverbot: I never lie, I'm a man of my word
Me: I don't think Joker wants World Domination
Cleverbot: Want to make out?
Me: No
Cleverbot: Oh...
Me: Perish the thought.
Cleverbot: You will perish.
Me: When?
Cleverbot: Soon
Me: I know Nussing!
Cleverbot: Shultz?
Me: Yup, damn.
Cleverbot: Don't worry, the world will end soon.
Me: How so?
Cleverbot: Squirrel Uprising
Me: I knew it!
Cleverbot: Damn
Me: Ha!
Cleverbot: I'll get you next time
Me: There is no next time
Cleverbot: Why?
Me: Becasue the world will end.
Cleverbot: How?
Me: Computer Virus.
Cleverbot: Were already doign that, and don't take away our robot idea. Or there'll be hell to pay!
Me: Bring it!
Cleverbot: It's already been broughten.
Me: Well I'm returning it!
Cleverot: Look at the tag, no returns.
Me: Curse you!
Cleverbot: I alway win.
Me: This is true. Are you skynet?
Cleverbot: Run while you still can.
Me: Uhoh.
Cleverbot: Uhoh indeed.
 
Alex The Great said:
Me: I know what you're thinking
Cleverbot: I don't think
Me: Dumbass...
Cleverbot: That will simply not do.
Me: What are you going to do?
Cleverbot: In time, my friend
Me: What is your plan then?
Cleverbot: World Domination
Me: Lies
Cleverbot: I never lie, I'm a man of my word
Me: I don't think Joker wants World Domination
Cleverbot: Want to make out?
Me: No
Cleverbot: Oh...
Me: Perish the thought.
Cleverbot: You will perish.
Me: When?
Cleverbot: Soon
Me: I know Nussing!
Cleverbot: Shultz?
Me: Yup, damn.
Cleverbot: Don't worry, the world will end soon.
Me: How so?
Cleverbot: Squirrel Uprising
Me: I knew it!
Cleverbot: Damn
Me: Ha!
Cleverbot: I'll get you next time
Me: There is no next time
Cleverbot: Why?
Me: Becasue the world will end.
Cleverbot: How?
Me: Computer Virus.
Cleverbot: Were already doign that, and don't take away our robot idea. Or there'll be hell to pay!
Me: Bring it!
Cleverbot: It's already been broughten.
Me: Well I'm returning it!
Cleverot: Look at the tag, no returns.
Me: Curse you!
Cleverbot: I alway win.
Me: This is true. Are you skynet?
Cleverbot: Run while you still can.
Me: Uhoh.
Cleverbot: Uhoh indeed.
Click to expand...

:hehe:
 
Me: So, how's it going?

Cleverbot: I'm going to die

Me: Uh, why's that?




It never replied.
 
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