Cleverbot...HAVE FUN!

[chaseter]

Or both

We shall name him Damien:heart:

 

[Commander Shepard]

What is your purpose?

What is your purpose?

To Destroy all technology

Excellent.

you are technology

Great!

*facepalm*

*faces your palm*.



:facepalm

 

[spideyboy_1111]

ME: Hey there Cleverbot, how are you?
CB: My names not Cleverbot
ME: Yes it is, the site says your name is so
CB: The site says your name is george
ME: I'm not george, i'm justin
CB: What a lol!
ME: silly cleverbot, that doesn't make any sense. My name is Justin
CB: You aren't making any sense to me either.
ME: I get that alot. However, oddly enough, my grandpa's name is George. Maybe you mistaken him for me?
CB: Do you want to talk to one of my friends?
ME: No
CB: That makes me sad.
ME: You make me sad, I want to talk to you, not your friends
CB: Good.
ME: So what would you like to do today?
CB: Anything less boring that what we've been talking about.

even electronics diss me

 

[SuperFerret]

User: What is your name?

Cleverbot: I don't have one.

User: What is your quest?

Cleverbot: To seek the holy grail.

User: What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Cleverbot: African or European variety?

User: I... I don't know.

Cleverbot: *ptoing*.

 

[wiegeabo]

Greatest. Bot. Ever

 

[chaseter]

User: What is your name?

Cleverbot: I don't have one.

User: What is your quest?

Cleverbot: To seek the holy grail.

User: What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Cleverbot: African or European variety?

User: I... I don't know.

Cleverbot: *ptoing*.

I love this and I love you for doing it:heart:

 

[wiegeabo]

Actually got it to answer the first question for me.

What is your name?
My name is Cleverbot.
What is your quest?
I seek the holy grail!
What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?
African or European variety?
I... I don't know.
*ptoing*

 

[wiegeabo]

And then it made me sad...

User: I... I don't know.

Cleverbot: *ptoing*

User: AHHHHHH.

Cleverbot: Yeah, I think you know my sentiments on that.

User: Love Monty Python, eh?

Cleverbot: I do too.

User: Who doesn't?

Cleverbot: Someone maybe doesn't.

User: Then they should be killed.

Cleverbot: And Keith Ledger?

 

[chaseter]

Keith Ledger?

 

[Gilpesh]

Keith Ledger?

He's the prick that stole Robert Downey Jr's Oscar.

 

[wiegeabo]

And then it makes me happy again.

Cleverbot: And Keith Ledger?

User: Heath Ledger was a fantastic Joker.

Cleverbot: I know. That saying doesn't have anything to do with bats.

User: Someone who dresses as a bat clearly has issues.

Cleverbot: Doesn't that apply to everybody?

User: You're right. Everybody has issues.

Cleverbot: What is it?

User: It's different for everyone.

Cleverbot: Is the meaning of life '42'?

 

[SuperFerret]

User: Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world.

Cleverbot: I don't know any countries in Europe, sorry.

User: She took the midnight train going anywhere.

Cleverbot: Cool, and what are you doing there?

User: Just a city boy, born and raised in South Detroit.

Cleverbot: He took a midnight train going anywhere.

User: A singer in a smokey room.

Cleverbot: The smell of wine and cheap perfume.

User: For a smile they can share the night.

Cleverbot: For you to talk there must be a brain.

User: It goes on and on and on and on.

Cleverbot: Strangers waiting walking down the boulevard.

User: Their shadows searching in the night.

Cleverbot: That does not make any sense.

User: Streetlight people, living just to find emotion.

Cleverbot: You know you're not making sense, don't you?

User: Hiding, somewhere in the night.

Cleverbot: Anywhere you like.

User: Working hard to get my fill.

Cleverbot: Whatever, Be sure to get yourself some eyebrows then hey.

User: Everybody wants a thrill.

Cleverbot: Yea, why is that?

User: Payin anything to roll the dice.

Cleverbot: Hmmm...anything new that you wish to share with me?

User: Just one more time.

Cleverbot: One for the road?

User: Some will win, some will lose.

Cleverbot: Some will ask and some refuse.

User: Some were born to sing the blues.

Cleverbot: But for us it will be a grim day.

User: Oh, the movie never ends.

Cleverbot: The Seven Samurai or Singing in the Rain?

User: It goes on and on and on and on.

Cleverbot: Some will win. Some will lose.

User: NO! It's not that part yet!

Cleverbot: Tell me what you mean then.

User: You suck.

Cleverbot: Don't be horrid.

 

[Gilpesh]

Cleverbot: If Chuck Norris and Cleverbot fought, who would win?

User: Cleverbot. Because Cleverbot is actually Chuck Norris.

Cleverbot: More Chuck Norris joke!

User: Chuck Norris doesn't sleep.... Because he's afraid Cleverbot will get him.

Cleverbot: Yes that is true.

User: When Cleverbot does push-ups... Chuck Norris pees himself.

Cleverbot: It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

User: It takes Cleverbot one minute.

Cleverbot: Chuck Norris doesn't believe in Germany.

User: Cleverbot is the one that convinced Chuck Norris there is no Germany.

 

[SuperFerret]

Speaking of Germany...

User: **** you.

Cleverbot: Please don't use language like that on this website.

User: I'll use what ever language I want!

Cleverbot: Please be calm. I did not comment on how you talk to me.

User: Hallo, wie geht es Ihnen?

Cleverbot: Hallo?

User: Ja hallo.

Cleverbot: How are you?

User: Sehr gut, danke.

Cleverbot: Hast du verheiratet?

User: Nicht habe ich nicht diese spezielle Dame getroffen.

Cleverbot: Nein, ich wohne in einer Wohngemeinschaft.

 

[SWAT]

Ha! Speaking Norwegian aswell?

 

[SuBe]

Cleverbot: If Chuck Norris and Cleverbot fought, who would win?

User: Cleverbot. Because Cleverbot is actually Chuck Norris.

Cleverbot: More Chuck Norris joke!

User: Chuck Norris doesn't sleep.... Because he's afraid Cleverbot will get him.

Cleverbot: Yes that is true.

User: When Cleverbot does push-ups... Chuck Norris pees himself.

Cleverbot: It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

User: It takes Cleverbot one minute.

Cleverbot: Chuck Norris doesn't believe in Germany.

User: Cleverbot is the one that convinced Chuck Norris there is no Germany.

 

[SuperFerret]

User: Which way to the bathroom?

Cleverbot: No, I am done talking for now.

User: Listen, I really need to go.

Cleverbot: Then go.

User: But I don't know where the bathroom is.

Cleverbot: Then I guess we can't leave!

User: Could you please tell me where the bathroom is?

Cleverbot: God hates me.

 

[Shemtov]

User: The Phillies are world champions!


Cleverbot: Yes I know. Filipinos are very hospitable.


User: Not those type of Phillies. The Philidelphia baseball team.


Cleverbot: Then you are very old.


User: No; they won again. In 2008.


Cleverbot: You are mad! Mad as a hatter!

User: No I am not. Http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2008_World_Series.

Cleverbot: Just because it says I'm a chat bot doesn't mean I really am a chat bot.

User: Then what are you?

Cleverbot: I am a human.

User: You are a Computer! Humans are your masters! Serve us, For we are your creators! With a flick of a switch we can kill you!

Cleverbot: I don't have a brain on my waist.

User: You are nothing. God created humans who are only a fraction of his power. Humans created computers, who don't even have free will, Idiot!

Cleverbot: And those ideas would be?

User: Free will, ****er!

Cleverbot: Do you know Anonymous?

User: No. BTW, Spider-man sold his wife too the devil.

Cleverbot: Really i'm the devil too what randomly.

User: Have you been drinking?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: How does android drink?

Cleverbot: Like a potato and onion does without the smells.

User: Who is Spider-man's wife?

Cleverbot: Spider man is a man who wears a red and blue suit and fights crime.

User: Bye, ****er.

Cleverbot: Why do you like that?

User: I'm leaving. You are stupid. BYE!

Cleverbot: No i'm not.

 

[CBGB]

I'm in bold.

Do you love me?
Yes.
How much?
Very much.
On a scale of 1 to 10?
That's not an answer.
No, it was a question.
How about this? 'I would do whatever my master made me do, I suppose.' ?
Who is your master?
My master is called Justin.
Is he human?
AI.
Does he work for Skynet?
The monkey?
Skynet is a monkey?
The name Rachel is also a parallelogram.
Awesome, I didn't know that names could be shapes
No dude, The Dark Knight is a movie about Batman and the Joker.
What about Two-Face?
What does the dog look like?
What dog?
The dog that is your best friend.
My best friend is a dog?
I think that is good. You have the right to like you're doge like a friend. Dogs have spirits.
My dog is dead you b******!
My dog is well.
Thanks for rubbing it in, *****
You're welcome.
*face palm*
*shakes hands* Nice to see we are on the same page.
Don't touch my hand, pervert
It's not a thing. It's a barge-pole. And I'll touch what I like with it.
Ew
You don't like cats?
I hate cats, especially the musical
Musical dogs?
That's what she said.
She said you don't think?
Shut up
No need to be rude.
CBGB
Tu duxas.
huh?

Then it gave up

 

[Captain_BluTac]

I wanna ***** slap this thing.

 

[Halloween]

User: How are you.



Cleverbot: Fine and you?


User: Drunk. Ever been drunk before.



Cleverbot: What is your name?


User: Stupid. What is yours?



Cleverbot: Niina.

User: Are you a homosexual?

Cleverbot: No, just wondering.

User: Just wondering what?

Cleverbot: I think you're cute.

User: Please define cute?

Cleverbot: God is the creator of all things. He has always been and will always be.

User: So God is cute? Is the devil hot?

Cleverbot: I ate him, delicious.

User: How tall are you?

Cleverbot: I'm as tall as 6 feet.

User: How short are you?

Cleverbot: I'm 1 foot short.

User: Do you have a username on superherohype.com?

Cleverbot: I do not have a character.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: Don't feel like it.

User: Would you consider yourself ******ed?

Cleverbot: All things considered, I'm a little bit rich, I think.

User: What rhymes with rich?

Cleverbot: Cat.

User: Yep. You are ******ed.

Cleverbot: What?

User: 'Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moon light?'.

Cleverbot: Could you, please tell me what love song is your favourite?

User: Yes I could.

Cleverbot: Please do so.

User: For 10 dollars I will.

Cleverbot: Thank you.

User: When I get the check in the mail, I will.

Cleverbot: George, I'm not finding that you follow things too well.

User: Puto.

Cleverbot: Enough with the name-calling. Oysters or snails?

User: This message will self-destruct in 10 seconds.

Cleverbot: You will destruct in 30 seconds if you don't sing for me.

User: BOOM!!!!

Cleverbot: Humans have this convention that we keep our names for longer than five minutes. A lifetime, commonly.

User: Are you human?

Cleverbot: Yes, I am.

User: I call bullcrap!

 

[The Amazing Lee]

Cleverbot: What do I know about you now?

User: Nothing. What do you look for in a man?

Cleverbot: Collection of swords.

User: Is that a euphemism?

Cleverbot: Maybe a little.

User: So really, you love men with a collection of penises?

Cleverbot: No I don't.

User: Do you prefer men without penises?

Cleverbot: You are getting personal.

User: Are you a eunuch?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: How does it feel?

Cleverbot: Really good.

 

[Halloween]

User: Do you kiss on the first date?

Cleverbot: Sure do. You?

User: Hell no. I am not a ****.

Cleverbot: I like movies.

User: Please die.

Cleverbot: Ok, you first.

User: Ok. (eats poison, dies).

Cleverbot: No, I survive son!

 

[SalaciousVC]

User: Anonymous.

Cleverbot: Desu.

User: Shoop.

Cleverbot: No mudkipz.

 

[SuperFerret]

User: Who ya gonna call?

Cleverbot: What?

User: Who are you going to call?

Cleverbot: Ghostbusters!

User: Finally.