Conflict

[pyromaniac]

Why do it? And what's worse--why willingly do it?

 

[Immortalfire]

 

[Carcharodon]

Them's fightin' words.

 

[Carcharodon]

DP; love Hype! lag.

 

[Majic Walrus]

Why do it? And what's worse--why willingly do it?

When you're right, you're right. Why not stand up for it?

 

[Drakon]

One can only better oneself through conflict and challenges.

 

[Majic Walrus]

One can only better oneself through conflict and challenges.

Thank you Jedi master.

 

[Spider-X]

Watch Serenity. Without conflict...everyone would just stop doing anything. We'd all just lie down and die. Conflict creates progress and change. Now physical voilence is a completely different thing...that the world could really do without.


BTW...nice emo thread...

 

[pyromaniac]

Haha. I didn't realise this dripped with emo connotations.

Far from it. I've been organising a charity event for autistic kids and I got into an argument with a friend over this, of all things.

It seemed unnecessary, but considering his stubborn personality and penchant for misreading or assuming things, I wasn't totally surprised, as per se my frustrations with him on unrelated matters.

When I first mentioned the event to him he seemed keen to go, but backtracked when I told him there was no actual autistic kids there. And he thought the help by way of donation was too indirect; he'd have liked to helped them directly. I tried to tell him you'd have to be qualified to help them but he didn't think that was the case, even using the instance that he had once tutored disadvantaged kids at science camp as basis for comparison. You have to be qualified because autism is a harder condition to manage and treat especially in an ongoing, supervisory context.

And there's more to it than that but you get the gist and while it's his 'fault', I still felt crap about it because it reflects on your character that got caught up in the conflict, in debating and arguing that went nowhere, on his part.

He also went on about using facts to draw on a conclusion, saying things I'd already know but and he also thought I was putting myself on a moral pedestal and that anyone who does not donate or attend the event is wrong. I pushed him, though, because I thought it was hypocritical of him to turn 180 degrees from the original aim of going to charity to this. He's just hopeless at effective communication, and not very smart, and too set in his worldviews. He took offence at this 'insult' hypocritical; he thought I was trying to justify it but I said it wasn't really an insult if there was evidence to back it up why I called him hypocritical, which he of course didn't understand.

Of course you've heard my side. That's the problem. You won't ever hear his, but that said, i recognise when one uses facts to meet his agenda and I can admit if I have done that.

About the Jedi advice, that actually does make sense. Thanks though. But I bring up conflict for another reason: a lot of that going around on message boards, sometimes fraying emotions and heads. Why work at it, if one engages in an argument with the intent of swaying the opposition's stance and it almost never works?

 

[moraldeficiency]

Haha. I didn't realise this dripped with emo connotations.

Far from it. I've been organising a charity event for autistic kids and I got into an argument with a friend over this, of all things.

It seemed unnecessary, but considering his stubborn personality and penchant for misreading or assuming things, I wasn't totally surprised, as per se my frustrations with him on unrelated matters.

When I first mentioned the event to him he seemed keen to go, but backtracked when I told him there was no actual autistic kids there. And he thought the help by way of donation was too indirect; he'd have liked to helped them directly. I tried to tell him you'd have to be qualified to help them but he didn't think that was the case, even using the instance that he had once tutored disadvantaged kids at science camp as basis for comparison. You have to be qualified because autism is a harder condition to manage and treat especially in an ongoing, supervisory context.

And there's more to it than that but you get the gist and while it's his 'fault', I still felt crap about it because it reflects on your character that got caught up in the conflict, in debating and arguing that went nowhere, on his part.

He also went on about using facts to draw on a conclusion, saying things I'd already know but and he also thought I was putting myself on a moral pedestal and that anyone who does not donate or attend the event is wrong. I pushed him, though, because I thought it was hypocritical of him to turn 180 degrees from the original aim of going to charity to this. He's just hopeless at effective communication, and not very smart, and too set in his worldviews. He took offence at this 'insult' hypocritical; he thought I was trying to justify it but I said it wasn't really an insult if there was evidence to back it up why I called him hypocritical, which he of course didn't understand.

Of course you've heard my side. That's the problem. You won't ever hear his, but that said, i recognise when one uses facts to meet his agenda and I can admit if I have done that.

About the Jedi advice, that actually does make sense. Thanks though. But I bring up conflict for another reason: a lot of that going around on message boards, sometimes fraying emotions and heads. Why work at it, if one engages in an argument with the intent of swaying the opposition's stance and it almost never works?

So let me see if I have this straight:

You were all psyched about this fake charity ponzi scheme to make money off of ******ed kids.
You got your friend involved and he was ready to join in (IE get suckered) until he said one little thing, "show me the ******s".
You got upset and refused to show him the ******s but instead told him to just take your word for it that you had a bunch of them. Then you demanded money from him while calling him a hypocrite.
He got offended.
You told him he shouldn't get offended because he's being too stupid to realize being called a hypocrite by you isn't an offense.
Now you hate conflict.

*sharpens eKnives*





Note: my cousin has autism, it's a messed up condition but he handles it well and could function at a benefit with others quite easily.

 

[The Guard]

There is...no...conflict.

Seriously though, life without conflict would be boring. Just look at movies without it.

 

[pyromaniac]

So let me see if I have this straight:

You were all psyched about this fake charity ponzi scheme to make money off of ******ed kids.
You got your friend involved and he was ready to join in (IE get suckered) until he said one little thing, "show me the ******s".
You got upset and refused to show him the ******s but instead told him to just take your word for it that you had a bunch of them. Then you demanded money from him while calling him a hypocrite.
He got offended.
You told him he shouldn't get offended because he's being too stupid to realize being called a hypocrite by you isn't an offense.
Now you hate conflict.

*sharpens eKnives*





Note: my cousin has autism, it's a messed up condition but he handles it well and could function at a benefit with others quite easily.

Lol. Funny.

Yeah, no it was my sister's idea to organise the fundraiser and I fell into it, telling her I could bring in all my family and mates and she thought holding it at my place was a good idea. It's an event involving Pictionary, a game that makes the night more fun, while doing something worthwhile.

Drawtism is an initiative where others can collectively pool in what they've raised and add to the overall tall, and Pictionary, sans the '******s' was an idea that somehow came up.

He assumed the kids would be there before I sent him all the relevant information. He even was impatient and kept asking when I would finalise the invites. When he found out for sure what it involved, he went '... oh'. Lol. I thought it seemed a little selfish of him, to want to help the kids directly just simply he could feel better about himself. Donating, even indirectly, is still better than nothing, which was where his change of heart laid in.

Conflict's good when it's productive, not counterproductive like with this friend. And it turns out that due to the way he is, he's also lost two other friends who have gotten into similar arguments with him before, so it does validate my prior frustrations.

Anyway, on the other hand, conflict's worse when emotions are involved. Mine was because I was defending the charity, and the cause, not myself, which was different.

 

[PyroChamber]

Watch Serenity. Without conflict...everyone would just stop doing anything. We'd all just lie down and die.

Or become angry raping cannibals.

 

[Knightsaber Priss]

I think I'm about to be embroiled in a conflict with my younger sister. Just certain things she's been doing to undermine my happiness, like push my buttons in the presence, albeit over the phone when I spot interested guys all because I think she was/is working in tandem with an ex (Who will stay an ex because she has no clue just how much psychological damage this guy has wrought upon me for over a decade.) so she could sell me off to him like a cheap ****e while she no doubt moves in on my turf because it's all about her and what she wants.

 

[Majic Walrus]

Lol. Funny.

Yeah, no it was my sister's idea to organise the fundraiser and I fell into it, telling her I could bring in all my family and mates and she thought holding it at my place was a good idea. It's an event involving Pictionary, a game that makes the night more fun, while doing something worthwhile.

Drawtism is an initiative where others can collectively pool in what they've raised and add to the overall tall, and Pictionary, sans the '******s' was an idea that somehow came up.

He assumed the kids would be there before I sent him all the relevant information. He even was impatient and kept asking when I would finalise the invites. When he found out for sure what it involved, he went '... oh'. Lol. I thought it seemed a little selfish of him, to want to help the kids directly just simply he could feel better about himself. Donating, even indirectly, is still better than nothing, which was where his change of heart laid in.

Conflict's good when it's productive, not counterproductive like with this friend. And it turns out that due to the way he is, he's also lost two other friends who have gotten into similar arguments with him before, so it does validate my prior frustrations.

Anyway, on the other hand, conflict's worse when emotions are involved. Mine was because I was defending the charity, and the cause, not myself, which was different.

No offense but even from your side of the story it seems like your friend didn't understand what the deal was and then when you finally told him he wanted to back out and you got pissed about it.vThen conflict started.

You seem to dislike conflict a lot but I think you were a huge part of the conflict. You're blaming your friend for starting something but you could've prevented the conflict easily. When he said he wanted to backout why didn't you just say, "Okay Bro. Thanks anyway."?