I agree, but at the end of the day, business and money pay a huge role in most actors' decisions. If they can't come to an agreement, than no matter how much he loves the character he might have to give it up. Of course, people from Marvel have stated that it's in their interest to have him back, but look at what happened to Terence Howard and Ed Norton.
Sure, a little more money but I don't see him pushing these guys around. He's one of the few truly good guys in Hollywood. I've heard stories about how and who he is, I've even been indirectly involved in one of the franchises he's been a part of and I've heard things that way. And this guy? He's the real deal.
The guys behind Iron Man and the guys behind Sherlock Holmes and etcetera gave him his first big break. Without these films, or at least without Iron Man, it's a question of who and when he could have gotten this comeback from. John F had to fight to convince Marvel that Robert was right for the role, so RDJ wasn't necessarily swimming in offers. These offers came largely due to Marvel giving him a chance. And he seems like a guy who knows this. If it was somebody else, then yeah -- but if it's one thing RDJ is? It's
loyal. If they need/want him to wrap things up in a way, he's not going to blow them off.
Same with Hugh Jackman. Why after so many years is he still Wolverine? Well, Wolverine was his first big break in the States. Wolverine helped make him who he is today. It turned Hugh into an A-lister.
When you go from just moderate well known and/or fighting to get your big break. And then it comes? Chances are you're going to always be loyal to the first team and film/character that gave you that shot. If Hugh was well-known in the states prior to Wolverine? I don't think he'd still be around. Same goes with RDJ. Basically saying, he might ask for a little more - but this is not a guy who's going to bully the guys who gave him that first big break. That'd just seem out of character. Shane Black took a chance with RDJ in 'Kiss Kiss Bang Bang,' in turn RDJ took a chance on Shane with IM 3. That's RDJ at work. I'm a fan of RDJ not just because he's a great actor, but because he's genuinely a good guy and that's hard to come by in Hollywood. If anything, the talks between RDJ and Feige would be mutual and trying to talk/reason it out - not their lawyers fighting each other. Does he want to be Iron Man forever? Definitely not, he's been carrying 4 films now. But, on the same hand, he doesn't just want to shove these guys aside. So, it's really coming to a mutual agreement that they can both see as the right choice. So if anything it's, "how can we make the right decision that does good by the fans, and we both come out on top?" and that is going to take a while to come to a decision on. After Iron Man, he could have become a jerk to the guys who made 'Sherlock Holmes' asking for more and more - but, he didn't.