First Writing Competition

[Seen]

Dude, that rocked.

WINNAH!

 

[La_She-Beast]

Definetely it was, actually, that was sweet, but sorry... it can't alter the movie

 

[Seen]

It could be a coda, like the Xavier one. That altered the movie.

 

[La_She-Beast]

Haha Oks

 

[gambitfire]

Dude, that rocked.

WINNAH!

Definetely it was, actually, that was sweet, but sorry... it can't alter the movie

Thanks.

 

[phoenix_force]

i'm not that good with writting but here goes
Extended Psychic Voices
Xavier:Phoenix Stop this now, Jean HELP ME!
Jean:you're just making it worse
Phoenix:Stay out of my head
Xavier:i knew this day would come Jean i could feel that you were alive at alkali lake
Jean:and you left me there?
Xavier: i had to i knew it was the only way to suppress Phoenix
Phoenix : you can't supress me Xavier i am power i am the result of the ultimate mutation i was born to rule the world
Xavier: you can't control your power look what happened to scott you killed the man you loved because you couldn't control yourself
Jean:NO professor you killed him! if you hadn't just left me there ,if you had warned scott he wouldn't be dead now!
Xavier: power without restraint , knowledge without wisdom , age without maturity , passion without love i must stop you Phoenix!
Phoenix: you set in motion the chain of events that lead to his death xavier
Jean:if you hadn't meddled with my mind as a child there would be no Phoenix with you meddling you split me in two one half all desire ,joy and rage and the other a more weak ,kind and intelligent side if you hadn't messed with my mind there would be no phoenix just me with more power but of course you were Jealous of a little girl who was already far more powerful than you...
Phoenix:i have always been more powerful than you Xavier by splitting me for Jean: you boosted that power and gave me a freedom ,you always knew this day would come Xavier you couldn't trap me in her mind forever now you will pay for all you did to me all those years!

 

[TKing]

Okay, here's my entry. Just an idea I thought of; something I personally would really have loved to have seen in X3.

I hope you guys like it, sorry that it ended up a bit longer than I expected.

INT. XAVIER’S OFFICE – DAY

Dark clouds loom over the Institute as thunder begins to roll. Storm stands by the window, looking out across the scenery when something catches her eye.

A picture on the Professor’s desk. A picture… of Jean Grey.

Storm moves to it, and takes it in her hands. She giggles at the memory of the kindred spirit, when Jean had just started out developing her powers… it seems like a lifetime ago. So different… so different to the sight of Jean now, now so corrupt and malice… now the Phoenix.

No , Storm thinks. It’s not Jean. It can’t be Jean. She would never do that. No matter what, Jean Grey could never hurt the ones she loved.

Then, something occurs to Storm. Something she hadn’t thought of before. If only, she thinks. Perhaps it could work… she bites her lip with anticipation. Could she dare it? No-one has ever tried it before… but Jean would. If Jean were in her position, Jean would do it, Storm convinces herself. I’ll do it… for Jean.

After one final glance at the photograph, she puts it down on the desk and leaves.

INT. SUBBASEMENT – NOT LONG AFTER

The elevator doors open, and Storm enters the bright, crisp hall of the Institute’s subbasement, outfitted with state of the art technology and the finest medical facilities money could buy.

The experiment lab… Danger Room… the infamous Blackbird… the Professor’s prized possessions. Storm has often wondered where her mentor had received the funding for such things. The Professor had always been so coy about the details. You can’t really blame them, Storm thinks. After all, the mutant issue is a sensitive one; who would want to be publicised, showing sympathy for the mutant blight in these stressful times?

But if there was one possession that Charles Xavier held most dearly, it was Cerebro. One of a kind… it’s the only known machine with the capabilities of locating any living person on the planet. All with the power of the Professor’s mind.

It’s said that only the world’s most powerful psychics could hope to master Cerebro. Even Xavier, arguably the most powerful telepath, took years to develop complete control over it… so what chance would a non-psychic like Storm stand?

None , she thinks to herself as she graces the long, cold halls of the basement. But that doesn’t matter anymore…

Her heels chip away at the stainless metal of the floor beneath, causing Storm to look over her shoulder every once and a while. But there really is no need. Most of the students have been told to keep to their dorms for the day, and Logan… well, he’s never around when you need him, Storm mutters to herself.

Finally, she comes to a large, circular-shaped door, an “X” engraved into its centre. Storm checks over her shoulder one last time and places a hand onto the door.

Sparks fly from her palm like miniature fireworks, as she manipulates the door’s wiring. It works; the doors slide silently across, as an automatic female voice chimes, “Welcome, Professor.”

She pauses for just a moment, wondering if this was such a good idea after all… but her mind flashes back to that image of Jean, of when she first welcomed Storm to the Institute, all those years ago…

She remembers when Jean was elected as her roommate, and how they stayed up, night after night… swapping girly stories and braiding each other’s hair. That was the Jean that Storm knew so well. And that was the Jean she was determined to get back…

So, heaving a sigh, Storm places one foot forward… and enters Cerebro.

INT. CEREBRO – SAME TIME

Storm creeps towards the console, wary of everything around her. She has been here before, but only a few occasions… and only in emergencies. Well, she ponds it over. I guess it’s an emergency now…

She kneels down in front of the controls, and as she puts on the helmet, Cerebro hums to life. She may not be a psychic, but the bond she and Jean once had… that might be enough, she hopes. Jean can read thoughts… if she’s somehow still in there, I can contact her. Suddenly, it doesn’t sound as convincing, but Storm isn’t backing down now. She’s come all this way… Jean is relying on her.

The walls fall away with the Cerebro effect. The room fades to blackness, with hints of light. In seconds, Storm is kneeling inside a giant image of the Earth, rotating around her.

Dotted across the continents are sparkling red and white lights, like stars fallen from sky. The white lights far outweigh the red ones.

STORM: Come on, Jean... where are you?

She closes her eyes, straining – focusing all her efforts on finding Jean. Suddenly, the white lights fade – leaving only the red ones. Cerebro zooms in closer, revealing a lone blinking red light. Latitude and longitude points are displayed.

It works! Storm gasps in surprise when the soft image of Jean Grey fades into view. She doesn’t seem to be moving; she is just staring off into space, like in some sort of trance. Tears almost swell in Storm’s eyes, seeing her friend again like this.

STORM (V.O.): Jean? Jean? Can you hear me?

Jean looks about, as if searching for Storm right there and then. Suddenly, she realises what’s happening.

JEAN (V.O.): Storm, how did you--? Why?

STORM (V.O.): I had to, Jean. I had to find you.

JEAN (V.O.): Why? What do you want from me?

STORM (V.O.): I want you to come home, Jean. Please stop this- you don’t belong with Magneto. Don’t you understand that?

JEAN (V.O.): I don’t know. Should I?

Storm senses something wrong. She starts to doubt if this was a good idea… what if she can’t get through to her, Storm doubts. What if she just makes Jean worse…?

JEAN (V.O.): I can read your thoughts, remember, Storm? I don’t need a machine like you. I’m more powerful than that.

STORM (V.O.): Is that what this is about? Power?

JEAN (V.O.): Isn’t it always?

STORM (V.O.): The Professor… is that why you killed him? Because of his power? You were jealous-?

Suddenly, Jean lets out a blood-curling shriek; something not natural to this world.

JEAN (V.O.): No! He had no power over me. I owned his power.

STORM (V.O.): But why? Don’t you remember anything? He was your friend, your mentor, your father-

JEAN (V.O.): And he left me to die!

STORM (V.O.): No. Of course he didn’t. He tried to save you; we all tried to save you. But you wouldn’t let us.

JEAN (V.O.): So now it’s my fault?

STORM (V.O.): No, I didn’t mean it like that.

JEAN (V.O.): Tell me, Storm. What did you hope to accomplish by contacting me? What was it you were looking for?

Storm takes a breath. She could still feel Jean, her presence… but it was buried beneath this hatred… this hurt. She could feel her friend’s spirit corrupted by this new entity; this… Phoenix.

STORM (V.O.): I was looking for hope, Jean. I know you’re still in there, somehow. Come back to us, Jean.

JEAN (V.O.): Jean… Jean. You use that word as if you know me… as if I’m somehow your friend.

STORM (V.O.): But you are-

JEAN (V.O.): You mean was.

STORM (V.O.): I want to help you!

JEAN (V.O.): Help me? Why does everybody keep saying that?

STORM (V.O.): Because we love you. Just like Scott did.

Jean reacts to the mention of her former husband; she seems hurt by this. Maybe there’s still good in her, Storm pleads…

JEAN (V.O.): No. I know what you’re thinking, Ororo. And no- there isn’t. Scott’s gone… and now I’m free.

STORM (V.O.): But-

JEAN (V.O.): Jean Grey no longer exists. She was a pathetic, snivelling excuse for a mutant. Her powers were wasted. She was only a puppet; a slave for your beloved mentor.

STORM (V.O.): A slave? And you’re not Magneto’s?

Jean scoffs.

JEAN (V.O.): Magneto has his uses. For now.

STORM (V.O.): What are you planning? What are you going to do?

JEAN (V.O.): What I have to. This world is full of the weak and the feeble…. I’m here to eradicate them!

STORM (V.O.): What would Scott say about this? Don’t you think you at least owe him something?

JEAN (V.O.): He was only holding her back. He knew the extent of her power… and it frightened him.

STORM (V.O.): That’s not true! He loved you-

JEAN (V.O.): Wrong. He loved the control he had over her. He could do anything he wanted; and she let him. What else was I met to do? He didn’t deserve to live.

STORM (V.O.): I can’t believe what’s happened to you, Jean.

JEAN (V.O.): Haven’t you been listening? I’m not Jean.

A sudden burst of energy eradicates from Jean’s body, sending shivers down Storm’s back.

STORM (V.O.): Think about what you’re doing. Who you’re hurting…

JEAN (V.O.): Your whining is becoming a nuisance.

STORM (V.O.): Then just come home! End this, now! Before it’s too late!

Jean laughs; a hypnotic, manic laugh.

JEAN (V.O.): Oh no! Things are only just beginning! You’re about to witness a new age, Ororo! The dawn of a new time… one where only the strong will survive.

STORM (V.O.): And what about the others? The ones that don’t survive?

Jean smiles; a sinister, bone-chilling smile.

JEAN (V.O.): I don’t know. You’ll have to let me know how that goes.

With that, a surge of energy bursts from Jean’s body, dazzling flames explode like fireworks, engulfing Cerebro. Storm shrieks in pain as the energy courses through the console, knocking her back several feet.

When she looks up, Jean’s image has vanished. Her breaths come in long, heavy bursts. That certainly wasn’t Jean anymore, she tells herself. It was something more powerful than she’s witnessed before…

As Storm regains her footing and limps towards Cerebro’s exit, the Phoenix’s words finally sink in. The weak will not survive… she’s right, Storm thinks. This Phoenix is planning a war…

As Storm leaves, her face becomes a manipulation of stone. No tension, no fear… only absolute. As she exits Cerebro, bruised and beaten from the attack, she finally understands. If this Phoenix wants a war… she’ll get one.

 

[Obsidian]

This is actually the beginning of my X4 script, but it could easily fit into the ending of X3:


FADE IN:

EXT. CENTRAL PARK, NEW YORK CITY - DAY

An elderly MAN sits at a small table playing CHESS. He has
one, obvious move till checkmate, but he does not touch the
board. He just stares at it silently, as if he were waiting
for someone to move it.

Camera pans to reveal the face of MAGNETO, the former mutant
terrorist leader who was rendered powerless. The absence of
power is evident through Magneto's weary eyes.

MAGNETO
If you're here to arrest me for
crimes against humanity, Agent
Bridge, where are your compatriots
from Homeland Security?

MAGNETO looks up into the fact of a tall, African American
military officer dressed in a crisp black suit.

AGENT BRIDGE
(leering)
I don't think I'll need backup to
deal with a mere human like
yourself. And I'm not here to
arrest you. I'm here, simply, to
check up on you, Mr. Lensherr.

MAGNETO
(scoffs)
Don't insult my intelligence, Mr.
Bridge. I know you are not here
because you are concerned about my
well-being.

AGENT BRIDGE
We need information, Mr. Lensherr.
Specifically information regarding
the mutant terrorist group with
which you were affiliated with
while you went under the alias of
Magneto.

MAGNETO
I still AM Magneto.

AGENT BRIDGE
Oh really? The Magneto I knew was
the "master of metal and
magnetism". Right here before me,
(MORE)
2.

AGENT BRIDGE (cont'd)
I see nothing more than a
harmless, old man

AGENT BRIDGE takes the seat across from MAGNETO and moves a
chess piece. MAGNETO takes affront to AGENT BRIDGE'S action
and glares at the C.I.A. officer. He turns his head
slightly, his eyes moving from BRIDGE's head to his chest.
His bitter glare suddenly changes into a wry smile.

MAGNETO
Do you enjoy taunting me, Agent
Bridge? Many who know me would
caution that to be unwise.

Agent Bridge just shrugs his shoulders in a state of
indifference of Magneto's "warning". Magneto chuckles.

MAGNETO
I knew a man who taunted me once.
I met him in that plastic prison
fashioned just for me. He beat me
as well. I'm sure aware of his
grisly fate.

Magneto leans forward so that only Agent Bridge can hear
what he is about to say.

MAGNETO
Don't think for a second that I
would hesitate to do the same to
you!

AGENT BRIDGE
I'm not afraid of you, Mr.
Lensherr

MAGNETO
That's your first mistake.
Embracing that false sense of
security. Tell me, Agent Bridge,
how is that pacemaker of yours?

A confused look appears on BRIDGE's face.

AGENT BRIDGE
How do you know about my.....

BRIDGE clasps his chest as he falls to the ground, knocking
the chess set and the pieces to ground. MAGNETO rises from
his seat and towers over the C.I.A. agent, his hand
outstretched.

3.

MAGNETO
I feel that your heart is not
beating as it should. Let me
adjust it for you.

MAGNETO moves his hand as if he were turning a doorknob as
he uses his abilities to control and manipulate METAL,
abilities that were believed gone after having been stabbed
with multiple syringes that containted the cure for mutants,
to violently move the PACEMAKER inside BRIDGE'S body.
Magneto makes another turn with his hand and BRIDGE'S body
goes limp.

MAGNETO
I'd say that is a significant
improvement, don't you?

Magneto uses his abilities to lift the fallen KING from the
ground. He inspects it and then looks BRIDGE'S lifeless
BODY. The men, women, and children at the park start to
notice the dead man, as well as the METAL CHESS PIECE that
is hovering over Magneto's HAND. They are frozen in shock
as the MASTER OF MAGNETISM easily displays the powers he had
once lost. The KING moves away from Magneto and rests on
BRIDGE'S body.

MAGNETO
I'll be seeing your superiors
soon, Agent Bridge

MAGNETO
(tips hat)
Checkmate.

 

[Seen]

^Wow, well done. I loved it.

 

[Matt.S99]

Ok i was bored, and i'm supposed to be doing homework, but what the hell i thought let me just give it a try.

Here is my entry, since no one can accept that he really was demolecularized.




The Credits role, Xavier’s scene ends.

EXT. “Astral Plane” UNKNOWN NEITHER NIGHT OR DAY

It’s Silent and it’s dark.

A voice is heard in the distance.

SCOTT​

Jean?

SCOTT​

Jean?!

A light begins to glow. As it spreads we begin to see Jean in a dark space wearing a green gown with a golden top piece. Darkness surrounds her with slight hint of stars all around.

A Silhouette appears besides her.

It's Scott.

SCOTT​

Jean?

JEAN ​

Scott.

She caresses his face.

SCOTT​

What is this place? Is this death?

Stars light up around them a universe unfolds, with planets, galaxies, and a sun.

JEAN ​

Not for you Scott, not for us.

Scott looks around in amazement while holding Jeans arms, he snaps out of his aw state and quickly turns towards Jean.

SCOTT​

The Phoenix Jean? Is she gone?

JEAN​

I am the Phoenix Scott.

She begins to emit fire.

SCOTT ​

No Jean. Jean?

JEAN ​

The Darkness is gone there is only Phoenix now. I will rise again.

SCOTT​

NO!!

He tries to hold her but something is pulling him back.

A Deep Female voice: It isn’t your time Scott. Wake up.

SCOTT​

JEAN!?!?

SAME VOICE​

Wake up

SCOTT​

No! I won’t lose you again!

The voice is clear now and not so deep, it’s a different woman.

WOMAN​

Wake up!

Scott opens his eyes and blasts the roof off what appears to be a library.

INT. Library Day

The woman who awakened Scott hands him something.

WOMAN ​

Here put these on.

Scott puts on a pair of glasses handed to him. He opens his eyes and everything around him is colored red, a woman is kneeling in front of him. She seems to be blonde and wearing white.

Scott touches his glasses.

SCOTT​

How did you know?

WOMAN​

Hi Mr. Summers, my name is Emma Frost.

She smiles at him.

Emma:

and we need your help.​

The End.

 

[Seen]

^That would've made X3 THAT more interesting and worthwhile if that scene would've been the coda or one of the codas.

Of course, then I would've been insanely hungry for an X4.

 

[flavio_lebeau]

some awesome scenes in here.

 

[Mdizzle]

Here's a scene between Pyro and Bobby:

*outside the clinic, surrounded by people for and against the cure*

"Copping out early aren't we."
He pivoted left, letting the slideshow of protesters and supporters alike play between them. Different hair, different clothes. Same c**ksure attitude, that grin. What was it about that flicker in the corner of his mouth, and his eyebrow would always jerk higher, as if pulled by a string. That knowing grin.
Bobby could see his expression, partially hidden by posterboards and knuckled fists. His friend, the same John. Combat boots.
"John," Bobby wheezed, uncertain.
The other one laughed to himself, gestures strobe-lighted against the crowd. "They called me John. My parents, I mean. One of those things I remember. I think they said, 'John, it's a noble name.'"
He was on the move. Bobby exhaled and lost him for a second, peering over bystanders, eyes groping past rallyers and indignant strangers alike.
"Over here."
Bobby spun on his heel, lost himself now. "John?" Someone closeby backed into him, catching him in the ribs and him doubling over.
"Pyro."
The crowd shifted, taking Bobby three steps forward. He felt the warmth of the flame so unexpectedly and recoiled, eyes wide despite suffering the jab to his waist. He saw that grin, emerging this time with a bit of tooth. His throat was on the defensive, forcing down his stomach and he felt his hands tighten into fists.
Pyro standing there, palm up this time, ball of heat reduced now to a small but significant flame. "Isn't it incredible? Control, I mean. As easily as I can make it grow, so soon I can put it down." Fingers clenched and the spark disappeared. He stood there, fist balled, as if feeling the weight of the flame extinguished in his own hand. "That's power. To hold something right in front of you and see it grow...and feel the control when you can crush it, take it away, break it." His eyes flickered up, temples throbbing as the flame reappeared.
Bobby steeled, shirt feeling sweaty, ice-cold. "You didn't come back. Why'd you do it, John? Go with Magneto?"
There was that grin again stapled with a laugh, the one Bobby knew, too boastful, too sure. Too nonchalant, yet empty this time, and Bobby couldn't read him.
"Mags. Magneto. Because he's the bad guy, classic comic-book evil. You know, the one who rules the world, because he can. Me, well, maybe I just got in touch with my inner flame."
The little fire hadn't grown, but held steady in Pyro's hand, and Bobby's throat knotted, eyes scanning as protesters pushed against them, never noticing the flame, low at Pyro's hip.
"And you're really that tough," Bobby wondered aloud. No move towards his friend, despite himself. "Come back to the school. You still can."
"It's a prison, don't you see? People always telling me what I can and can't do, people telling me how to be. Who to be. This," he nodded, leveling the flame, "this is who I am." He took a step forward, and Bobby steadied, forcing a stare. "They called me John. It was a name, a person they wanted me to be. I shamed them. This is who I am."
He snapped his palm shut and the flame disappeared for a second. There it was, the fire incredible this time, and Bobby watched, nearly dumbstruck, as strangers cried out, pushing and stumbling to get by. It seemed almost heavy, but Pyro handled the growing blaze with the skill and poise of an experienced juggler.
"Come on Iceman," he called, baiting him. "Make a move."
A moment's hesitation and Pyro launched the flames with light and unbelievable speed, flare hitting the mark and the clinic exploding in splinters of glass and heat.
"Control is power. I can break you, Bobby. Don't stand in my way."


I posted this in another thread previously...not enough John around. Plus, was really interested in the tension brewing since X2...could have gone in lots of directions with that.

 

[TKing]

Any more entries? Great ones so far, I've loved reading all of them.

I'm sure there's more talented writers out there.

 

[Pyroschik]

So do i. Gr8 job so far guys!

 

[Angamb]

First post updated.

I have to translate one of my scenes.

 

[Matt.S99]

angamb,may i suggest spell check,just so it is easier to read for the perople who cant understand you sometimes

 

[Angamb]

don't understand why you say that? Have I written something bad here?

 

[LadyVader]

Clinique room in the afternoon. Rogue is inside taking her jacket off and sitting on one of the beds. A male nurse prepares a seringe.

MALE NURSE
Lift up your sleeve.

ROGUE
What? Why?

MALE NURSE
We need a blood sample. In case you have an adverse reaction to the cure. We need a sample of your original antibodies. Just in case.

Rogue lifts her sleeve. The nurse prepares to draw blood but rogue stops him.

ROGUE
You might want to put on some rubber gloves first.

MALE NURSE
Excuse me?

ROGUE (embarrassed)
I... I can't control my power.

MALE NURSE
I see. Alright...

Puts on rubber gloves and takes the blood sample. Next he prepares the cure. Rogue fidgets. She looks nervous. The male nurse looks her up and down, pensively.

MALE NURSE
Miss?

ROGUE (startled)
Yes?

MALE NURSE
You alright? Are you sure you want to do this?

ROGUE
Of course I'm sure. This is what I want. Anyway, what do you care?

MALE NURSE
I make it a point to ask everybody who comes in here if this is what they think is really best for them.

ROGUE
Is this a hyppocratic oath type of thing?

MALE NURSE
If you wanna call it that. I thought I was just being considerate.

Rogue smiles

MALE NURSE
Having no control is scary. But a decision made out of fear... you never really think about the consequences.

ROGUE
Look, it's not like it's any of your business, but I'm not doing it out of fear. I'm doing it out of love.

MALE NURSE
The people that love you would love all of you. Everything that makes you special.

ROGUE
You see that's where you're wrong. I don't need to suck the life out of people to be special. Now give me the damn cure!

MALE NURSE
Alright, chere.

He prepares the seringe. Rogue stares at it for a second, and then extends her hand determined. She receives the shot, and closes her eyes feeling it's effects.

MALE NURSE
There you go.

ROGUE
There I go.

She gets dressed. The male nurse prepares the next tray for the next pacient.

ROGUE, standing in front of the doorway
Do you really go through this with every pacient?

MALE NURSE, smirking
Neh. Just the pretty girls.

Rogue giggles.

MALE NURSE
You'll be alright... Marie. You got people looking out for you.

ROGUE
Thank you.

End scene

FADE IN
NIGHT, outside the clinique.

A man exits through the back door caring a container. He places it on the back of a motorcycle. He's wearing a hospital robe which he takes off, revealing a strange body suit. He removes his brown contact-lenses. He mounts the bike and looks back at the clinique with his red on black eyes. He revves up the engine and speeds away.


end scene

Fade in

The motorcycle stops outside of a warehouse. A man exits the warehous, his face hidden by shaddows. All you can see are his red eyes.

MAN ON MOTORCYCLE
I have it.

He opens up the container. It's filled with douzens of viles of blood. He extracts one. Hands it over to the other man. He holds it up and stares at it, with admiration.

MR. SINISTER
Excellent, Gambit excellent. Now... we have work to do.

 

[CapBeerCino]

You had me at-

Alright, chere.

 

[LadyVader]

*wink wink nudge nudge*

 

[gambitfire]

I knew it was Gambit the moment he said Chere.




Edit - Dang CapBeerCino beat me to the post.

 

[flavio_lebeau]

yeah, chere made me smile. :heart:

 

[LadyVader]

Not the most action packed intro for our cajun, but he does turn out to be working for Sinister. Oh, and he called Rogue chere only AFTER she started getting bossy and not before.

 

[Goddessreicho]

Angamb, can I change my scene? Or is it too late?

Edit: Very nice Remy intro.