First Writing Competition

[Child-of-Light]

also we arent aloud to change any part of the film right so were basiclly writing a deleted scene

 

[Angamb]

Angamb, can I change my scene? Or is it too late?

Aynone can change his entry, but should be in the same post, beacuse there is already a link in the main post.

And I'll post my entry next week. I'll travel tomorrow.

 

[La_She-Beast]

2 days to go... noone else posting theirs?

 

[xmenfilesfan05]

I really want to, but I might not be able to finish it...we'll see.

 

[Angamb]

I'm back from my journey. So I'll translate my scene done time ago.

 

[TKing]

Can't wait to see it.

 

[La_She-Beast]

Me neither

 

[Angamb]

you already know it, shebeast, is the Angel-Rogue scene.

 

[Angamb]

Sorry, but now I'm really tired and am not abble to translate my scene so for today, I post it in spanish. Tomorrow I'll translate it.

Is this:

Spoiler

Jardines de la escuela de Xavier.
Pícara está sentada en un banco, con la mirada triste y perdida.
Tras unos segundos de introspección, nota la presencia de alguien, gira la cabeza y ve a Angel que se le acercaba.

Angel (acercándose): Hola… eres Pícara, verdad?
Pícara: (extrañada) sí…
Angel: Bobby me habló de ti hace un momento.

Pícara baja la mirada, triste. Pequeña pausa.

Angel: oh, disculpa, quizás te estoy molestando…
Pícara: no… no pasa nada (Pausa)
Angel: estaba dando una vuelta por el jardín y te ví aquí, sóla…

Pícara esboza una leve sonrisa, pero sin disimular su caos interno.

Angel: siento… lo del profesor. (Pausa) parece que todos le querían mucho…
Pícara: (con una tristeza contenida) era más que un profesor… era como un padre para nosotros… (Pausa)
Angel: me hubiese gustado conocerlo… (Pausa)
Pícara: (con cierta precaución) tú… ¿tienes familia?
Angel: (sonríe) mi padre es Warren Worthingthon… ya sabrás quien es…
Pícara, tras unos segundos de sorpresa y curiosidad, asiente.
Angel: (al notar su aparente interés) estuve a punto de… ya sabes
Pícara: (intrigada) qué pasó?
Angel: no pude… no era lo que yo quería. Supongo que la actitud de mi padre todos estos años me ha hecho creer que yo no era feliz siendo… siendo mutante. (Pausa) En el fondo, ha sido más un problema suyo que mío. (Pausa. Aliviado) Por suerte, reaccioné a tiempo.

Pícara se ha quedado ensimismada. Angel intuye su conflicto.

Angel: Pícara…

Ella le mira, sin decir nada. En sus ojos se puede ver su gran tormento.

Angel: (preocupado) ¿tu quieres… curarte?

Pícara no responde. Se inquieta, vacila, sin saber qué decir, intentando contenerse, hasta que finalmente no puede más y estalla. Llora.
Tras esta inesperada reacción, Angel siente compasión por ella, al verse indentificado.

Pícara: (llorando) no sé… (Las lágrimas la interrumpen).
Angel: (intentando ayudarle) tranquila… (Pausa)
Pícara: (entre lágrimas) primero lo de la cura… luego el profesor…

Angel, comprensivo, no dice nada, dejando que se libere.
Poco a poco, Pícara consigue calmarse.

Angel: sé cómo te sientes… lo que ha pasado con el profesor debe ser muy duro… pero tienes que ser fuerte… y creer en ti… en quien eres. (Pequeña pausa) Supongo que es lo que él querría…
Pícara: (algo más aliviada, pero con su conflicto aún presente) lo sé…

Angel le regala una tierna sonrisa, en señal de apoyo. Pícara se la devuelve, agradecida, quedándose pensativa luego.

Primer plano de Pícara. Música. Transición a otra escena.

 

[MaleRogue]

Is Rogue called Pícara is Spain??

OMG that is weird

 

[Angamb]

Yes, hehe.

 

[MaleRogue]

weird......

But I like DD

So we have Rogue, Malicia and Pícara

 

[Angamb]

Malicia is a spanish word too, and sounds really bad for her.

 

[La_She-Beast]

Isn't that the mexican version? hm...
At least we translate it correctly lol

 

[flavio_lebeau]

Shes Vampira in Brazil Although I like the name Vampira. She's a vampire in some way. And jeez, Pícara is indeed embarrassing, if she had that name in here, she would be a target for maaaaaany jokes.

I wonder how the fans of Malicia received movie Rogue. Because the last thing she has in the movies is "Malicia". Rogue? Yes, she's kind of. But Malicia, not really...

 

[La_She-Beast]

kapweeng

 

[La_She-Beast]

lol Vampira makes more sense

 

[gambitfire]

y yo pensando que en enspanol la llamaban chupa cabra..........o_0

 

[Angamb]

Falvio, Picara is a literal translation of Rogue. I like how it sounds. Like Rogue too, but the rest..... no thanks, hehe.

 

[flavio_lebeau]

y yo pensando que en enspanol la llamaban chupa cabra..........o_0

LOL

yeah Angamb I know. But it wouldn't sound good in Brazil.

 

[Angamb]

could anyone help translating my scene?

I should create the voting thread, but firstly this scene should be in english, to all can read it well.

 

[La_She-Beast]

could anyone help translating my scene?

I should create the voting thread, but firstly this scene should be in english, to all can read it well.

=

She-Beast, can you translate the scene for me please?



I'll post it as soon as poss

 

[gambitfire]

Script by Angamb:

=
Sorry, but now I'm really tired and am not abble to translate my scene so for today, I post it in spanish. Tomorrow I'll translate it.

Is this:

Spoiler

Jardines de la escuela de Xavier.
Pícara está sentada en un banco, con la mirada triste y perdida.
Tras unos segundos de introspección, nota la presencia de alguien, gira la cabeza y ve a Angel que se le acercaba.

Gardens in the Xavier institute.
Rogue is sitting on a bench with a sad and lost look.
After she suddenly notices someones presence, she turns and sees Angel approach.

Angel (acercándose): Hola… eres Pícara, verdad?
Pícara: (extrañada) sí…
Angel: Bobby me habló de ti hace un momento.

Angel: (walks closer) Hi....your Rogue, right?
Rogue: (strange look) Yes...
Angel: Bobby spoke to me about you a while ago.

Pícara baja la mirada, triste. Pequeña pausa.

Rogue lowers her head with a sad look on her face. She pauses.

Angel: oh, disculpa, quizás te estoy molestando…
Pícara: no… no pasa nada (Pausa)
Angel: estaba dando una vuelta por el jardín y te ví aquí, sóla…

Angel: Oh, sorry, i must be bothering you....
Rogue: no.... no it's nothing (pause)
Angel: I was strolling through the Garden and saw you here, alone.


Pícara esboza una leve sonrisa, pero sin disimular su caos interno.

Rogue smiles a bit, but without hiding her iner chaos.

Angel: siento… lo del profesor. (Pausa) parece que todos le querían mucho…
Pícara: (con una tristeza contenida) era más que un profesor… era como un padre para nosotros… (Pausa)

Angel: I'm sorry.. about the Professor. (Pause) I can tell he was well loved by everyone around here.

Rouge: (with a sad look) he was more than a Professor... he was like a father to all of us....(pause)

Angel: me hubiese gustado conocerlo… (Pausa)
Pícara: (con cierta precaución) tú… ¿tienes familia?
Angel: (sonríe) mi padre es Warren Worthingthon… ya sabrás quien es…
Pícara, tras unos segundos de sorpresa y curiosidad, asiente.
Angel: (al notar su aparente interés) estuve a punto de… ya sabes
Pícara: (intrigada) qué pasó?

Angel: I would have loved to meet him...(pause)
Rogue: (with certain precaution) you..... Have a family?

Angel: (smiles) my father is Warren Worthington..you'll soon know who he is Rouge, following a couple of second of surprise and curiosity, (i don't know how to translate that word, sorry )

Angel: (when noticing her aparent interest) i was almost about... you now.

Rouge: (intrigued) what happened?



Angel: no pude… no era lo que yo quería. Supongo que la actitud de mi padre todos estos años me ha hecho creer que yo no era feliz siendo… siendo mutante. (Pausa) En el fondo, ha sido más un problema suyo que mío. (Pausa. Aliviado) Por suerte, reaccioné a tiempo.

Ange: I couldn't....It wasn't what i wanted. I suppose that my fathers attitude these past years made me believe i wasn't happy being.....being a mutant. (pause) deep down, it was more his problem than mine. (pause. relieved) Luckily, i reacted in time.

Pícara se ha quedado ensimismada. Angel intuye su conflicto.

Angel: Pícara…

Ella le mira, sin decir nada. En sus ojos se puede ver su gran tormento.

Angel: (preocupado) ¿tu quieres… curarte?

Rogue is left speechless. Angel sees her conflict. (I don't think i translated that well )

Angel: Rogue....

She looks at him without saying anything. In her eyes you can see her torment.

Angel: (worried) You want to.... be cured?


Pícara no responde. Se inquieta, vacila, sin saber qué decir, intentando contenerse, hasta que finalmente no puede más y estalla. Llora.
Tras esta inesperada reacción, Angel siente compasión por ella, al verse indentificado.

Rogue does not respond. She becomes impatient, empty, without knowing what to say, inent on containing herself, until she finally can't anymore and explodes. She cries. Following this unexpected reaction, Angel feels compasion for her, while seeing himself identified with her

Pícara: (llorando) no sé… (Las lágrimas la interrumpen).
Angel: (intentando ayudarle) tranquila… (Pausa)
Pícara: (entre lágrimas) primero lo de la cura… luego el profesor…

Rogue: (crying) I don't know....(Her tears interrupt her).

Angel: (Trying to help her) it's ok.... (or something else)
Rogue: (between tears) First the cure....Then the Professor.

Angel, comprensivo, no dice nada, dejando que se libere.
Poco a poco, Pícara consigue calmarse.

Angel: sé cómo te sientes… lo que ha pasado con el profesor debe ser muy duro… pero tienes que ser fuerte… y creer en ti… en quien eres. (Pequeña pausa) Supongo que es lo que él querría…
Pícara: (algo más aliviada, pero con su conflicto aún presente) lo sé…

Angel, comprehensive, does not say anything, letting her set free.
Little by litte, Rogue manages to calm herself

Angel: I know how you feel....What has happened with the professor must be dificult....but you need to be strong...and believe in yourself... in who you are. (small pause) I suppose that is what he wanted.....
Rogue: (Feeling somewhat better, but with her conflict still present) I know...


Angel le regala una tierna sonrisa, en señal de apoyo. Pícara se la devuelve, agradecida, quedándose pensativa luego.

Primer plano de Pícara. Música. Transición a otra escena.

Angel gives her a small smile, with a sign of support. Rogue returns to her normal self, grateful, and stays thinkitive.

First plan of Rogue. Music. Cut to next scene.

 

[Angamb]

Thanks gambitfire.

Here is continuous:

___________________________________________________

Gardens in the Xavier institute.

Rogue is sitting on a bench with a sad and lost look.
After she suddenly notices someones presence, she turns and sees Angel approach.

Angel: (walks closer) Hi....you’re Rogue, right?
Rogue: (strange look) Yes...
Angel: Bobby spoke to me about you a while ago.

Rogue lowers her head with a sad look on her face. She pauses.

Angel: Oh, sorry, i must be bothering you....
Rogue: no.... no it's nothing (pause)
Angel: I was strolling through the Garden and saw you here, alone.

Rogue smiles a bit, but without hiding her internal chaos.

Angel: I'm sorry… about the Professor. (Pause) I can tell he was well loved by everyone around here.

Rouge: (with a sad look) he was more than a Professor... he was like a father to all of us... (pause)

Angel: I would have loved to meet him... (pause)
Rogue: (with certain precaution) you..... Have a family?
Angel: (smiles) my father is Warren Worthington..you'll soon know who he is Rouge, following a couple of seconds of surprise and curiosit, assents
Angel: (when noticing her aparent interest) i was almost about... you now.
Rouge: (intrigued) what happened?
Angel: I couldn't....It wasn't what i wanted. I suppose that my father’s attitude these past years made me believe i wasn't happy being.....being a mutant. (pause) deep down, it was more his problem than mine. (pause. relieved) Luckily, i reacted in time.

Rogue is left speechless. Angel suspects her conflict.

Angel: Rogue....

She looks at him without saying anything. In her eyes you can see her torment.

Angel: (worried) do you want to.... be cured?

Rogue does not respond. She becomes impatient, empty, without knowing what to say, trying to containing herself, until she finally can't anymore and explodes. She cries. Following this unexpected reaction, Angel feels compassion for her, while seeing himself identified with her.

Rogue: (crying) I don't know... (Her tears interrupt her).
Angel: (Trying to help her) calm down...
Rogue: (between tears) First the cure....Then the Professor…

Angel, comprehensive, does not say anything, letting her set free.
Little by little, Rogue manages to calm herself.

Angel: I know how you feel....What has happened with the professor must be difficult....but you need to be strong...and believe in yourself... in who you are. (small pause) I suppose that is what he wanted.....
Rogue: (Feeling somewhat better, but with her conflict still present) I know...

Angel gives her a small smile, with a sign of support. Rogue returns to her normal self, grateful, and stays thoughtful.

First plan of Rogue. Music. Cut to next scene.

 

[La_She-Beast]

Bravo

About intuir (intuye) I think it's "sense" no? And thinkitive? Does that exist? I think it's thoughtful...