I think the most important thing is to feel like you're making a difference with what you do. If you have some autonomy over it and if you feel like you're making progress. If you hate your job, then yeah, the only thing to do is to spend your spare time and money on things that will make you feel better about your crap job.
If you're running a rat race in your job, it'll spill over into your personal life. Like CosmicPinchy's original post mentioned, there are people who will treat vacation as some kind of contest. I have relatives who do this, and they are absolutely the kind of people who are focused on achievement, not personal experience.
You can work hard, make money, and not buy into the consumerist culture. You just have to have a good deal of self-awareness, which I think is lacking in a lot of people know. Even for financially successful people, it's never enough. There's always the next job, the next raise, the next promotion, etc.
I'm lucky enough to consider my colleagues my friends too. I believe in some boundaries, but you can certainly be friends with your coworkers. I mean, those people watch your back, why shouldn't they be your friends?
I run with a pretty hippie group, so when we're not "working," we're still working on things to help society. Sure it's still work, but geez, we love it, so what if it would be considered work by most people?
Work by itself, is not bad. Most people, if given the choice, would choose to work and feel productive. But that's the thing - it has to feel like you're making progress, it's something you have some control over, and that you're making a difference with it. Take any of those things away, and it becomes something you hate having to do.
And if you have something constantly stressing you out, you fill that hole in your life with more material stuff.