Bashing Joe Q isn't really the resolve you should all be looking for. Even Stan Lee was opposed to the idea of Peter getting married. That is actually how Gwen Stacy came to her untimely demise. Stan had felt that he and other writers had fleshed out her character, and the depths of her relationship to Peter. So he saw only two choices. Have Peter marry Gwen, or kill Gwen off. Mr.Liberman chose to give her death. In his own words, he felt that Peter wasn't in the right moment, to be a married man. If I am not mistaken, Stan Lee spoke about this with Kevin Smith on that "Mutants, Marvels and Monsters" interview DVD.
With that in mind however, I feel that the marriage is very much a part of Spider-Man's history, if not legacy. MJ sort of completes Spider-Man's life. Spidey has always been this powerful person who adheres to the right path, yet he knows this life of pure misery. From selfishness costing him a loved one, to being bullied in high school. Even now, as a super hero, he remains hated and untrusted by many. Mary Jane is his one small light, in the depths of a deep darkness. She is easily played against Peter's character. Getting rid of her will solve nothing. The problem isn't necessarily the characters...but rather, the position that writers put them in. If everybody weren't out to "update" Spidey, or to retcon something, the book may be better off. Not that I can complain too much. I feel that Straczynski has really gotten back to his roots with Spidey, as of late.
How many villains and characters have died in the pages of Spider-Man books? Captain Stacy, Gwen Stacy, Doc Ock, Norman and Harry Osborn...the list is quite long. However, these writers keep returning to these long bured characters. They either flesh out some new circumstance (Sins Past), or find some way to resurrect them (Doc Ock). That should tell the writers and execs, a thing or two about their own universe. Stop trying to fix everything. There is a simple philosophy in martial arts. "Don't think, do." It is also sometimes said as "There is only doing, and not doing. There is no such thing as a try." Marvel has been trying for too long. It's time that they merely, do or don't. And at the moment, i'd say they don't....