Batman
Dramatic Example
- Joined
- Oct 1, 2003
- Messages
- 19,335
- Reaction score
- 7
- Points
- 58
Many moons ago, same Bat-Time, same Bat-channel...
DL stands, utterly confused by what just happened.
DL: "
"
See?
DL: "Well... that was all completely pointless. Goody. Now we know where this damned story is going. Nowhere.
"
Meanwhile, as the kids frolick around President Lee (Newly elected), Something pops up out of the water behind someone. Immediatley, the person begins screaming. This is joined by more screaming. DL looks over, mortified.
DL: "Oh no. Lee took off his shorts again..."
Ambassador Lee (Newly promoted): "Oi! I gots me fish and chips, I do, I do!"
DL: "..."
DL: "I need a drink, after this..."
Suddenly, DL realises something.
DL: "...Maybe some buffalo wings, too.
"
MB: *in the distance* "Fatass."
DL: "Your turkey baster."
Suddenly, yet again, DL realises something. Lee is screaming from many miles away. He's not even in the water. He got a crab stuck on his foot.
DL: "...Hold on. If Lee is over there, and people are screaming over there, and Phillip Seymour Hoffman wins an oscar just before appearing in a summer blockbuster starring Tom 'Crazy' Cruise... Then that can only mean..."
DL: "
"
DL: "SHARK! EVERYBODY OUT OF THE WATER!!!"
DL hears a noise, looking down at his pants. He unzips them, pulling out his walkie talkie. (...That's not innuendo, by the way)
MB: "What the hell are you talking about? There is no shark!"
DL: "But... But I did math, and all..."
MB: "My two year old illegitimate son could do math. Doesn't mean you're right. Ass."
DL: "Yeah, but... Wait... illegitamate son?"
MB: "GODDAMN IT! I SAID PARIS HILTON! PARIS. HILTON! EVEN PARIS HILTON COULD DO MATH! SON OF A B-"
MB cuts out on the walkie talkie. DL looks out at the ocean, seeing something in the distance. It's...
DL: "..."
The San Antonio Spurs, taking a swimming lesson. In ballerina tutus. But otherwise, no Shark in sight. DL simply sighs, and walks off to get a tall, cold one.
MB: "...That innuendo?"
...No. You bastard.
Meanwhile...
A tall, gorgeous young woman under the influence of obvious religon related mind control jogs around the beach, naked, much to the delight of MB and... well, no one else. She stops, looking at the beach, as she spots something. Her eyes widen.
Back at the beach...
DL turns, hearing more screams.
DL: "Son of a beeyotch. I want to go home and plow MB's mom, damn it. This better be important, or there'll be faces to punch.
"
Katie Holmes (From Distance): "S...Sh...
DL: "What?"
Katie Holmes (From Distance): "Sh... Shar... TOM CRUISE!!!"
DL: "Who?"
Katie Holmes (From Distance): "MY FIANCEE!! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!"
DL begins walking. Then running, towards the beach, alert, as he realises his son is on that beach.
Katie Holmes (From Distance): "...Oh, and some fin or something is sticking up out of the water."
Shark: "..."
Shark: "Well gee, there goes my cover. Thanks alot, b****."
DL continues running, as the beachgoers run in fear from Tom Cruise.
Tom Cruise: "I'M NOT CRAZY! I KNOW THE HISTORY OF CRAZINESS! YOU DON'T! YOU'RE ALL GLIB! GLIB! ZOOBLAEFOO!"
DL knocks him over, running out towards the ocean as he spots the Shark.
Tom Cruise: "Avenge me... Travolta... Nya..."
John Travolta: "..."
John Travolta: *flies away on umbrella copter*
In the ocean...
DOG LIPS Jr.: "Asswipes."
DL's Dead Father: "Damn it! Stop saying that!"
The Shark begins swimming after DL Jr., at mind numbing speeds. Infact... I'm getting... sl... sloooooweeer... just....waaatcching... ittt....
Shark: "DunaDunaDunaDunaDunaDuna..."
Shark: "Wait ...Don't we have music?"
DL: "Lousy John Williams wouldn't accept our offer of three pales of chicken livers. The weenis."
Shark: "*grumbles* DunaDunaDunaDunaDunaDunaDuna..."
The Shark continues towards DL Jr, almost ready to bite him.
Shark: "I'm gonna bitechoos!"
Carlos Mencia: "..."
Carlos Mencia: "I-"
Comedy Central: "...Don't even think about it."
DL stands, utterly confused by what just happened.
DL: "
"See?
DL: "Well... that was all completely pointless. Goody. Now we know where this damned story is going. Nowhere.
"Meanwhile, as the kids frolick around President Lee (Newly elected), Something pops up out of the water behind someone. Immediatley, the person begins screaming. This is joined by more screaming. DL looks over, mortified.
DL: "Oh no. Lee took off his shorts again..."
Ambassador Lee (Newly promoted): "Oi! I gots me fish and chips, I do, I do!"
DL: "..."
DL: "I need a drink, after this..."
Suddenly, DL realises something.
DL: "...Maybe some buffalo wings, too.
MB: *in the distance* "Fatass."
DL: "Your turkey baster."
Suddenly, yet again, DL realises something. Lee is screaming from many miles away. He's not even in the water. He got a crab stuck on his foot.
DL: "...Hold on. If Lee is over there, and people are screaming over there, and Phillip Seymour Hoffman wins an oscar just before appearing in a summer blockbuster starring Tom 'Crazy' Cruise... Then that can only mean..."
DL: "
"DL: "SHARK! EVERYBODY OUT OF THE WATER!!!"
DL hears a noise, looking down at his pants. He unzips them, pulling out his walkie talkie. (...That's not innuendo, by the way)
MB: "What the hell are you talking about? There is no shark!"
DL: "But... But I did math, and all..."
MB: "My two year old illegitimate son could do math. Doesn't mean you're right. Ass."
DL: "Yeah, but... Wait... illegitamate son?"
MB: "GODDAMN IT! I SAID PARIS HILTON! PARIS. HILTON! EVEN PARIS HILTON COULD DO MATH! SON OF A B-"
MB cuts out on the walkie talkie. DL looks out at the ocean, seeing something in the distance. It's...
DL: "..."
The San Antonio Spurs, taking a swimming lesson. In ballerina tutus. But otherwise, no Shark in sight. DL simply sighs, and walks off to get a tall, cold one.
MB: "...That innuendo?"
...No. You bastard.
Meanwhile...
A tall, gorgeous young woman under the influence of obvious religon related mind control jogs around the beach, naked, much to the delight of MB and... well, no one else. She stops, looking at the beach, as she spots something. Her eyes widen.
Back at the beach...
DL turns, hearing more screams.
DL: "Son of a beeyotch. I want to go home and plow MB's mom, damn it. This better be important, or there'll be faces to punch.
"Katie Holmes (From Distance): "S...Sh...
DL: "What?"
Katie Holmes (From Distance): "Sh... Shar... TOM CRUISE!!!"
DL: "Who?"
Katie Holmes (From Distance): "MY FIANCEE!! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!"
DL begins walking. Then running, towards the beach, alert, as he realises his son is on that beach.
Katie Holmes (From Distance): "...Oh, and some fin or something is sticking up out of the water."
Shark: "..."
Shark: "Well gee, there goes my cover. Thanks alot, b****.
"DL continues running, as the beachgoers run in fear from Tom Cruise.
Tom Cruise: "I'M NOT CRAZY! I KNOW THE HISTORY OF CRAZINESS! YOU DON'T! YOU'RE ALL GLIB! GLIB! ZOOBLAEFOO!"
DL knocks him over, running out towards the ocean as he spots the Shark.
Tom Cruise: "Avenge me... Travolta... Nya..."
John Travolta: "..."
John Travolta: *flies away on umbrella copter*
In the ocean...
DOG LIPS Jr.: "Asswipes."
DL's Dead Father: "Damn it! Stop saying that!"
The Shark begins swimming after DL Jr., at mind numbing speeds. Infact... I'm getting... sl... sloooooweeer... just....waaatcching... ittt....
Shark: "DunaDunaDunaDunaDunaDuna..."
Shark: "Wait ...Don't we have music?"
DL: "Lousy John Williams wouldn't accept our offer of three pales of chicken livers. The weenis.
"Shark: "*grumbles* DunaDunaDunaDunaDunaDunaDuna..."
The Shark continues towards DL Jr, almost ready to bite him.
Shark: "I'm gonna bitechoos!"
Carlos Mencia: "..."
Carlos Mencia: "I-"
Comedy Central: "...Don't even think about it."
