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Jessica Alba Sees The Love Guru

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I don't think there's an Alba movie you dislike, JAL. :ninja:
 
i think this movie'll be good looks funny

i swear i uploaded the trailer to youtube last night, when i woke up it went to 7,000+ views, ha maybe i dont use youtube all that much but that was weird, i guess the trailer was just released
 
Whatever the heck that means..

Anyway, I thought the movie looks terrible from the preview.

-TNC
 
I don't know that was pretty bad, I didn't laugh one time during the trailer. I really like Micheal Myers too.
 
Yeah that was pretty awful. Justin Timberlake was an added cringe. But once again this will probably the kind of horribly reviewed, forgettable crap that Paramount rakes in the dough from.
 
It looks like an Austin Powers movie in disguise really.:shock Not a great preview though i did think some of it was funny like the part in the plane and Justin Timberlake in his acting goofy in underpants caught me off guard.:woot:

Did you guys happen to see Meagan Good coming out of the pool?!:wow: :bow:
 
http://filmonic.com/hindu-organization-demand-that-leaders-see-mike-myers-the-love-guru

The trailer for Mike Myers’ The Love Guru was released earlier this week and it did not make everyone laugh. A Hindu organization, Universal Society of Hinduism, has demanded that the film be shown to Hindu leaders and organizations prior to its public release. The reason:

Rajan Zed, prominent Indo-American leader and President of the Society, said that from the information available about the movie, it appears to be lampooning Hinduism and Hindus and using Hindu terms frivolously.

There have been issues with religion and movies before, most recently with The Golden Compass, and again with Mel Gibson’s Passion Of The Christ back in 2004. To my knowledge the only thing gained from it was more publicity for the film. I don’t know what the Hindu leaders can do, apart from possibly get a free early screening. The studios have spent millions making the movie and they will release it whether it upsets people or not.

The email I received pointed out that:

Hinduism is the oldest and third largest religion of the world with about one billion followers and a rich philosophical thought, and it should not be taken lightly

Do Paramount want to piss off one billion people? Will those one million people have gone to see The Love Guru anyway? Do you think the Universal Society of Hinduism is over-reacting or do they have a right to be annoyed that a movie is turning their religion into a romantic comedy staring Jessica Alba?
Click to expand...
 
damn, i wasn't expecting that. i didn't hear any criticism come out for the Guru.
 
kda445.jpg
 
Electrix said:
http://filmonic.com/hindu-organization-demand-that-leaders-see-mike-myers-the-love-guru
Click to expand...

I am a Hindu and i would like to see this movie flop because it looks bad and it indeed does make fun of the religion in several ways. I mean the scene in which in which mr. love guru is covering up his lower part of the body with some iron steel so that he cannot do stuff to jessica alba in the movie is so humiliating that it isn't even funny. Sometimes controversy sells and sometimes it affects the movie hard like the golden compass so i would like to see this go the same path as tgc.
 
The Love Guru Sneaks at ShoWest

While most attendants at this year's ShoWest convention knew that they would be getting an early look at a rough version of DreamWorks Animation's upcoming animated film Kung Fu Panda, they probably didn't realize that Paramount would be giving them a sneak peek at Michael Myers' first live action comedy in over five years as they showed four clips from The Love Guru, coming out this summer. (Check out our new still from the movie, as well pictures from Ben Stiller's new comedy Tropic Thunder and Kung Fu Panda via the Film Database.)

The surprise was revealed as DreamWorks CEO Jeffrey Katzenberg was telling the audience about how much success the company has had with the "Shrek" franchise which was given a screening at ShoWest seven years prior and that he wished Shrek could be with him now. Michael Myers walked out on stage and stated that he was there as good luck for Katzenberg, and then started hitting on Katzenberg to try to embarrass the CEO in front of the audience. Myers then took the microphone to talk about the movie and he introduced Jessica Alba as "the mother of his child," and she came out, looking very pregnant, to chide him for lying like that and the two of them started riffing a bit about how entertainment journalists would print whatever they say without fact-checking, they pimped the movie a bit more and then stepped aside to let the footage speak for itself.

The first clip introduced Myers' Guru Pitka as he appeared in front of an admiring audience of his followers for him to give his spiel, talking about the five points of his ashram, which spelled "E. I. E. I. O.", and talking about his mentors, all gurus with long silly names that acted as double entendres like Guru Tugginmypudha (played by Sir Ben Kingsley) but he focused specifically on one whose name sounded like Guru "Has A Small Wiener" and his sayings, a few which he recited, noting how they got somewhat cruder as he became crazy from syphilis.

The second clip opens with the Guru Pitka and his man-servant performing a duet on sitar and acoustic guitar--sorry, I can't remember what song they were playing--but then Alba's character Jane enters, looking hot as always, which Pitka points out: "You look breathtaking… as do I." He asks her if she's hungry and claps his hands for them to bring his meal. They sit at a table and he offers her a local delicacy from his country, which is two lychees in a pocket, an Indian dish lovingly referred to as "Nuts in a sling" and sure enough, the exotic food item looks like a pair of testicles. His servant then asks if they'd like their nuts to be crushed, at which he starts beating them with a hammer as Pitka winces with each hit, and then the servant takes them and starts dipping them in a pot of boiling water. Pitka asks Jane if she'd rather have soup and she immediately says "Yes" so he declares "Alligator Soup and make it snappy!" then goes about explaining the double entendre for anyone who didn't get it.

The third clip introduced Justin Timberlake's character Jacques Grande, a Canadian hockey player, who Guru Pitka and his trusty man-servant seem to be stalking. Jacques drives up to his mansion in a flashy white sports car with a red rooster emblazoned on the hood, pulling through the mansion gates, which also have a rooster on them. Pitka tries to sneak onto Grande's mansion complex hiding behind a bush with his transport elephant obviously not being quite as obscured.

We see Justin doing a fairly weak attempt at a Quebec accent as he attempts to woo a very fine looking Meagan Good, suggesting they watch "Fried Green Tomatoes" before telling her his back story, that everyone thinks his mother is a hooker and his father is a lumberjack because he's from Quebec--in fact they are--before he starts serenading her with a Celine Dion song, and he offers her a "Quebec pizza," which is a pop tart with ketchup. (It's not a very funny bit, to be honest.)

Meanwhile, Guru Pitka is approaching the house and he sees a sign that reads, "Warning: Guard Rooster!" and sure enough, there's a rooster that Pitka has a stare-down contest with while Jacques continues his wooing completely oblivious to the tussle going on outside, as we see Pitka struggling with the rooster, getting away before being dragged back into the fight as feathers fly everywhere. Pitka finally wins out and exhausted, he throws himself against the glass patio doors, covered in blood and feathers with the rooster's head between his teeth, scaring Good's character.

The final clip was actually a Bollywood musical number of the Guru Pitka playing the Steve Miller Band's "The Joker" on his sitar as various scenes and gags rapidly cut together in succession with lots of Vern Troyer. Towards the end, Alba appears dressed in Indian garb with dancing girls behind her to sing one refrain of the chorus.

As far as my opinion on whether the clips were funny, well, let's just say that Myers isn't branching out too much from the "Austin Powers" movies so if you find that stuff funny, you'll probably laugh at this as well. Really, the only thing that had me laughing even a little was the fight with the rooster just because it was so outlandish.

You can decide for yourself when The Love Guru opens on June 20.
Click to expand...

http://www.comingsoon.net/news/showestnews.php?id=42881
 
Wow, reading that preview, I'd be really surprised if India doesn't want to lynch Mike Myers. Eating testicles and leeches? Guru "Has A Small Weiner"? Man, that sounds even more racist than the dinner scene in "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom".

I'm hating the comparisons between this and the "Austin Powers" films. The difference between them is that the "Austin Powers" movies were funny. Judging from the trailer, this looks like complete ass. There was more humor in "Schindler's List" than in the trailer for "The Love Guru".
 
lollycop said:
Meh the movie might be good...
Click to expand...

I think it should be. I've been waiting patiently for some new Myer-ness for a while, now.

I like the concept, of him as a Guru and all. If he were playing the same old Scottish-character, a la Stuart Mackenzie or Fat Bastard...it would be kinda the same thing...

The Indian/guru aspect + Canada/Hockey + Alba = sounds good to me...
 
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