"That's enough, Bench."
Hydro-Man reforms in front of me, trying to hide his surprise with a scowl.
"Yes, I know who you are," I continue.
"And I know what happened to you. If you let me, I'd like to help you."
Hydro-Man laughs - a response I'm used to receiving.
"Help me? Look at me!" He extends his arms to the side and turns them into concentrated water jets. Like a watery blob, the arms are reabsorbed and resume their normal shape.
"I've never been better!" This time, he turns the water jets on
me, with enough force to knock me off my feet and launch me into the side of the armored van.
I pull myself out of the dent I made in the side of the van. Water drips from my costume and races back to Hydro-Man.
"I don't understand. You weren't a criminal before the accident. What changed?"
"Everything changed!"
He tries his water jet trick again, but this time I'm ready for him. I hit him with a blast of arctic breath which freezes his arms solid. I'm not usually the type for it, but upon seeing the puzzled expression on Hydro-Man's face, I smirk. That only seems to fire him up as he redoubles his efforts. The ice shatters, and the jets hit me with significantly more force than before. This time, I topple over the van completely.
"What about you, hero?" Hydro-Man asks condescendingly.
"You never once thought about using your powers to improve your situation?"
"Never."
Hydro-Man scowls.
"Then you're an idiot, and we're done talking!" He covers my mouth with his hand and starts pumping water into my mouth. Unfortunately for him, he doesn't seem to know just how long I can hold my breath. My heat vision burns through his arm, turning it to steam.
"&*@%!"
I try to grab Hydro-Man by the collar of his shirt, but he turns completely to water and splashes on top of me. I stand up, stepping over the toppled van, and watch the sentient puddle snake its way across the street. I tag him with another burst of heat vision. That's when I see what he's doing. He turns into a giant fist and knocks a fire hydrant loose.
Clever.
Hydro-Man starts absorbing the extra moisture, quickly growing to three times his normal size.
"That's it! You and this whole city are going to drown!" He fires a water jet at me at the same moment that I unleash my heat vision. The two opposing blasts meet in the middle, creating a cloud of steam ten feet above the ground. Hydro-Man steps on top of the broken hydrant, and he continues to grow. As he does, his water jet inches towards me.
As long as Hydro-Man can turn into water at will, I can't physically detain him. And he may be able to blast me around, but he's never really going to hurt me, either. So it's a stalemate. Unless...
I zoom away from the scene, looking for the nearest construction site. I remember seeing one a few blocks away when I was flying over here. At the construction site, I pick up two bags of concrete mix and throw them over my shoulders. Nodding to the shocked construction workers, I say,
"Carry on, boys."
I race back to where I left Hydro-Man. He's standing in the middle of the street, still more than three times the size of a normal man, no doubt wondering where I went. I fly above him, tearing open the two bags of concrete mix. They hit Hydro-Man's watery skin with a
plop.
"What the--?"
The suddenly lumpy Hydro-Man looks up and sees me.
"It sounds like you need a better moral foundation, Bench," I announce. I hold up one of the bags so he can see.
"But failing that, this will have to do."
Hydro-Man has time to gulp before I clock him once. His very tangible body falls to the street, now starting to turn a grayish color. My only hope is that when they strain out what's left of him, they'll put him to good use watering a garden or maybe keeping some flowers fresh in a vase.
I return the armored van to its upright position, flattening out the dent I made. I weld the doors back on, for which the shaken driver was very appreciative. I head to the nearest hardware store and buy two bags of concrete mix to return to the construction site. While there, I also help the boys with some tricky welding. After helping them to load some gravel into a truck bed, I take off with a smile to return to the Daily Planet.
***
"Smallville, where were you?" Lois asks, getting up from her desk as I walk in, still adjusting my tie. "Jimmy and I got back, and you were nowhere to be found - as usual."
Smiling pleasantly, I say, "Had to follow up on that water treatment plant for Perry." I sit down at my desk, pulling up the article in question and printing it. As it prints, I turn back to Lois. "So, how about you? Catch up to that Hydro-Man?"
"Hydro-Man? Hey, that's pretty good. Come up with that yourself?"
I shrug.
"Mind if I use it?" Coming from Lois, I know the question is only a formality. She's already back on her keyboard, typing away. "Hydro is with a 'y,' yes?"
I try not to laugh. "Yes, Lois."