Please view/rate my first short film!

[The Nose Goblin]

Hey Hype,

I've recently completed my first short film called 'The Spell Book' and I wanted some honest feedback from the community.

Logline/Synopsis: Three friends confront evil in the form of a demon possessed teddy bear after opening an ancient spell book.

I have hopefully embedded the video correctly, but if not I'm also providing direct links to the YouTube and Vimeo versions.

[YT]http://youtu.be/IUzD162l4uw?hd=1[/YT]

YouTube HD Link: http://youtu.be/IUzD162l4uw?hd=1

Vimeo link: http://vimeo.com/46170834

So, let me know what you think!

Thanks!

 

[CConn]

It's extremely well shot, lit, edited, mixed, etc. It looks and sounds like a professionally edited video.

Your actors, and the story leave a lot to be desired though. It plays out like a sitcom episode more than anything particularly expressive and artistic.

So yeah, on the technical side, it's phenomenal, on the artistic side, it could use some work.

 

[The Nose Goblin]

It's extremely well shot, lit, edited, mixed, etc. It looks and sounds like a professionally edited video.

Your actors, and the story leave a lot to be desired though. It plays out like a sitcom episode more than anything particularly expressive and artistic.

So yeah, on the technical side, it's phenomenal, on the artistic side, it could use some work.

And this is why I love the Hype. Unfiltered constructive criticism. I'm just pleased as all get out that you thought it looked and sounded professional.

Thanks for taking the time to watch and comment.

 

[CConn]

I'm very academic when it comes to these things.

And truthfully, the technical side of it is usually the harder and more rarely done correctly of the two anyway, so you have that going for you.

 

[Mandalore464]

Edit : Deleted

 

[Ipodman]

I know nothing about filmmaking but that was a good movie. I "ed" it

 

[The Nose Goblin]

Congratulations on putting it all together, which is already quite an achievement.

I thought it was funny. Yes, the actors weren't very convincing but I think you could have greatly improved their performances through a "tighter" edit...

That's my biggest gripe with the film : the editing is very academic, it feels more like a collage of scenes than a breathing, living thing if that makes any sense.

Rhythm and timing are probably the most critical aspects when attempting to amuse people or make them laugh.

I would advise against directing and editing a film at the same time, because you tend to just cut the film as you envisioned it, as you "planned", instead of approaching the dailies with an unspoilt, fresh eye and see what they have to offer that you may have missed because you already had an all too clear vision of what you wanted them to be.

I don't mean to sound like a know-it-all lecturing you, there's what you should do and what you have or want to do, and if you like to edit your own projects, it's fine. I'm just giving you my opinion about it.

Other than that, the even lighting and 16:9 ratio did feel a bit sitcom-y, but that's a matter of personal preference, and your film looks totally professional.

Congrats again.

Wow, thanks for taking the time to write out such a long and detailed response.

Glad you thought it was funny!

And you should have seen the first edit! ;-p

 

[The Nose Goblin]

I know nothing about filmmaking but that was a good movie. I "ed" it

Thanks!!