- Joined
- Aug 17, 2003
- Messages
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Now that challenge is over, I want to toss in my 2 cents:
Matt- You seem to follow a similar style to me, at least in this challenge. You focused on personal drama and put the horror elements in the backdrop. This is my philosophy on writing, also: hook the reader on my characters first. Your submission wasn't scary in a traditional sense, but it had a lot left to my imagination, which I like. It also had me focus on a different type of horror.
Very well done story
Immortal - No easy way to put this, but this needed a lot of improvement. The werewolf turn is too sharp and you focus too much on describing what is going on, but you don't add atmosphere. Without atmosphere to balance out your action, I can't get scared. I think you needed to isolate this story more. With 500 words or less, less is more. Too much is going on, and it gets gross for my taste.
Kal - I like your story a lot. My one complaint would be clarity. I got lost on a few things and had to reread your story a couple times in order to get a few things cleared up. However, that can be a strength to it as I look back. It is one of those types of stories. I love the ending and you did a great job at being creative and letting me imagine. Not spell it out for me.
Iron Fist - Your story I think had the best overall horror atmosphere. You added atmosphere to it, and did it well. I felt like I ws reading a traditional horror story. I also like that you knew when to change paragraphs and isolate speak from action. Not many on here do that efficiently. I may not have done the dream ending, though. I normally find that cheap, but that is just me.
Alex - First, seperate paragraphs! Your story was hard to read. You did things I liked, but in a challenge on horror, I think you went too Army of Darkness. You also hit the wall of explaining vs insinuating. Always insinuate, never spell out in horror. Imagination is scarier. I also may have picked something creepier than slime, or made the slime somehow more menacing. I also think you needed to fix how your doctors talk. You had some good ideas, though, and I think with work, this is very salvageable.
My personal favorite was Matt's submission, but not by that much. It was pretty close for me between Matt, Kal, and IF.
Well done guys
Matt- You seem to follow a similar style to me, at least in this challenge. You focused on personal drama and put the horror elements in the backdrop. This is my philosophy on writing, also: hook the reader on my characters first. Your submission wasn't scary in a traditional sense, but it had a lot left to my imagination, which I like. It also had me focus on a different type of horror.
Very well done story

Immortal - No easy way to put this, but this needed a lot of improvement. The werewolf turn is too sharp and you focus too much on describing what is going on, but you don't add atmosphere. Without atmosphere to balance out your action, I can't get scared. I think you needed to isolate this story more. With 500 words or less, less is more. Too much is going on, and it gets gross for my taste.
Kal - I like your story a lot. My one complaint would be clarity. I got lost on a few things and had to reread your story a couple times in order to get a few things cleared up. However, that can be a strength to it as I look back. It is one of those types of stories. I love the ending and you did a great job at being creative and letting me imagine. Not spell it out for me.
Iron Fist - Your story I think had the best overall horror atmosphere. You added atmosphere to it, and did it well. I felt like I ws reading a traditional horror story. I also like that you knew when to change paragraphs and isolate speak from action. Not many on here do that efficiently. I may not have done the dream ending, though. I normally find that cheap, but that is just me.
Alex - First, seperate paragraphs! Your story was hard to read. You did things I liked, but in a challenge on horror, I think you went too Army of Darkness. You also hit the wall of explaining vs insinuating. Always insinuate, never spell out in horror. Imagination is scarier. I also may have picked something creepier than slime, or made the slime somehow more menacing. I also think you needed to fix how your doctors talk. You had some good ideas, though, and I think with work, this is very salvageable.
My personal favorite was Matt's submission, but not by that much. It was pretty close for me between Matt, Kal, and IF.
Well done guys

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