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The James Bond Series "Caption This!" Thread

The Chairman

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You know the drill. Take any picture from a James Bond movie and caption it with anything you can come up with.

I'll start.

dn-2-4338-dr-no.jpg

"I'm warning you, 007. As soon as I find a way out of this suit, I'll kill you."

I know it's lame. Let's see what you guys can come up with.
 
Blissful_Holly.jpg

HOLLY [exhausted]: "Mmm... I haven't been f***ed like that since grade school..."

Paris_and_bond.jpg

TERI HATCHER: "Wait till the girls back on Wysteria Lane hear about this!"

Madeline_smith.jpg

MISS CARUSO: "Hi, um, I lost my mantra."

Molly_Peters.jpg

PATRICIA FEARING: "Oh damn it, James stole my nurse uniform again! That's the third uniform he's stolen from me this weekend!"

Plenty_O%27Toole.jpg

PLENTY O'TOOLE: "Did someone say pork rines?!"

Plenty_and_bond.jpg

PLENTY: "Wait - do you think the audience can see my ass through these panties?

daniel_craig__james_215681g.jpg

CRAIG BOND: "Size matters, b1tch."
 
Dr_No_Honey_Ryder.jpg


Honey Ryder: Look at me! I'm the first chick that banged James Bond!

dr-no-photo-dr-no-6206219.jpg


James Bond: Why is this picture in black and white, if the movie is in color?

Honey Ryder: How the hell should I know? I'm not paid to think.

dn-2-3220-dr-no-guard.jpg


James Bond: A mystical force that surrounds us and all living things, that is The Quickening.

goldfinger-gegner2.jpg


Auric Goldfinger: Why, WHY didn't I just shoot Bond instead of capturing him so he can escape later?

goldfinger.jpg


Auric Goldfinger: I am rich, therefore I golf, because rich people in movies MUST play golf.

thunderball.jpg


"Mr. Largo": I am Blofeld's number two man... Number Two.

thunderball.jpg


Mr. Largo: I lost this eye when I tried to pet Blofeld's *****...hehehe...
 
Laz_69.jpg

GEORGE LAZENBY: "I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why. My nightly bloodlust has overflown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy. I think my mask of sanity is about to slip."
 
This is the oddest photo caption contest ever.....for a start, there are hardly any photos...
 
Help us then Kev - cut & paste whatever Google Bond images you can find!

Laz_69.jpg

GEORGE LAZENBY: "'Winged Freak Terrorizes'? Wait'll they get a load of me..."
 
rk012.jpg

Jaws : What do you mean I become a nice guy in Moonraler???!?!?!?! IT SUCKS!!!!!!!!

ac004.jpg

Boris : Sorry old chap, this film got to be a little bit kid friendly because you were scary in TSWLM

rk009.jpg

Jaws : And if I brutally disconnect your computer how will you write the end of this movie????

ac002.jpg

Boris : Damn, now you got me, my balls are squeezed
 
you%20only%20live%20twice4.jpg


James Bond:He draws a stick, you draw a gun. He sends one of you to the hospital, you send one of them to the morgue. That's the Chicago way.

on_her_majestys_lg_02.jpg


Blofeld: Why did they give you Christian Bale's speech from "American Psycho"?

James Bond: They couldn't think of anything else forme to say since I haven't been in any other movie other than this one.

2.jpg


James Bond: This never happened to Sean Connery...specially because he has a career and I don't.

on%20her%20majestys%20secret%20service5.jpg


Blofeld: Now WHERE IS MY LOLLIPOP!?

auservicedesamajeste.jpg


James Bond: Now this would be very erotic if it weren't for that stupid children's choir in the background...

live_and_let_die_pic1.jpg


James Bond: I don't know what's worse, being replaced by Timothy Dalton, or being replaced by Val Kilmer...

live_and_let_die_pic5.jpg


Kananga: Yo man! I be Mr. Big, shizzle! Bond, man, I'm gonna bust a cap on yo ass, bro!
 
NOJE-11s54-bond-540_368.jpg

CRAIG: "Next one who calls me James Blonde is gonna get it right between the balls!"
 
Madeline_smith.jpg

MISS CARUSO: "I don't know who the father is!" [starts crying]
 
TH_man_with_golden_gun03_h110.jpg


Scaramanga: You must join me, Mr. Bond, and together we will destroy the Sith!

TH_man_with_golden_gun33_h110.jpg


Sheriff J.W. Pepper: Hey, aren't you that guy from that movie with Jean-Claude Van Damme?

James Bond: No. you must be thinking of a different person.

man_with_the_golden_gun_pic1.jpg


James Bond: Hey baby...wanna se MY "golden gun"?

ManWithTheGoldenGun_1974.jpg


Moneypenny: Why won't you have sex with my, James?

James Bond: Moneypenny, you are far too pretty to contract VD.

the%20man%20with%20the%20golden%20gun4.jpg


Mary Goodnight: I'm, like, totally an MI-6 agent! Isn't that cool? Like, I have license to kill and all!

ManWGoldenGun7.jpg


James Bond: I always liked schoolgirls better than figure skaters...

gun.jpg


Scaramanga: My Uruk-Hai warriors... who do you serve?

James Bond: What?
 
Molly_Peters.jpg

"James, do you really expect me to walk all the way back to my office naked?"
 
The_Spy_Who_Loved_Me_01.JPG


Anya Amasova: I'm a XXX agent, just like Vin Diesel. And I can't act worth crap, just like Vin Diesel

The_Spy_Who_Loved_Me_05.JPG


AnyaAmasova: So, are you my friend or my enemy? Am I supposed to shoot you or bang you? And how the hell can I be your enemy if I don't even have a cat to pet?

spy_who_loved_me.jpg


James Bond: You bastard! You killed Roy Scheider! DIE!

Jaws:Wrong Jaws, James.

moonraker.jpg


James Bond: So, that was really you in "Inspector Gadget"?

Jaws: Hey, gimme a break, I needed the job. At least it's better than working with Adam Sandler

for_your_eyes_only_lg_01.jpg


Melina Havelock: Hey, you don't look too sexy with your shirt off.

James Bond: Oh, shut up!

For_Your_Eyes_Only_05.JPG


Melina Havelock: Hey, what the hell am I doing with this crossbow? I'm a Bond Girl, I'm not supposed to have weapons!

For_Your_Eyes_Only_06.JPG


James Bond: Why do I look like Super Mario?

Melina Havelock: And why does that guy have a shoe for a head?
 
a-view-to-a-kill-photo-xl-a-view-to-a-kill-6207115.jpg


James Bond: You know...I like banging any woman no matter what race they are.

view2kill.jpg


May Day: I pity da fool dat messes wid me!

living_daylights_lg_01.jpg


James Bond: D.J., I am your father.



living%20daylights%20ski.jpg



James Bond:Weewooiuyuouothyyaieoouwaaa!!!!

Kara Milovy: I guess you lost your mind after that movie with Fran Drescher...

The_Living_Daylights_01.JPG



Kara Milovy: What the hell am I supposed to do with this things? Why do they keep giving weapons to people that can't use them?

daylights_maryam.jpg



Kara Milovy: You know, the damn cello looks hotter than me in this picture...

daylights_wax.jpg


General Pushkin: With this historical figures, I am finally gonna pass my History class! EXCELLENT!
 
The_Spy_Who_Loved_Me_05.JPG

ANYA: "You auctioned off my panties you bastard!"
 
The_Spy_Who_Loved_Me_05.JPG

ANYA: "In certain extreme situations, the law is inadequate. In order to shame its inadequacy, it is necessary to act outside the law. To pursue... natural justice. This is not vengeance. Revenge is not a valid motive, it's an emotional response. No. Not vengeance. Punishment."
 
licence06.jpg


James Bond: By the moons of Mongo, I now delcare you husband and wife!

licence02.jpg


James Bond: Now why Do I feel like I'm trapped in a "Miami Vice" episode?

goldeneye_bond-xenia.jpg


James Bond: I'm Irish, we let people know how we feel.

Xenia Onatopp: No, you're not.

goldeneye_xenia2.jpg


Xenia Onatopp: I TOTALLY don't look ridiculous on this clothes!

Tomorrow_Never_Dies_3.JPG


James Bond: My bussiness IS my pleasure.

bond.jpg


James Bond: Yeah, they may seem like they are trying to kill us, but I can assure you that they come in peace.

007%20-%20Tomorrow%20Never%20Dies.jpg


James Bond: You want fries with that, beeyatch?
 
Madeline_smith.jpg

MISS CARUSO: "I'm a nice girl. No really, I am a nice girl. I was a virgin until I was 24 which is around the time that I met James and he said he would make me a woman."
 
Plenty_and_bond.jpg

PLENTY O'TOOLE: "I wish I could quit you."
 
goldfinger.jpg


Goldfinger, leaning on golf stick: Do you notice my ass?

James Bond: .....Yes....

Goldfinger: Touch it?

James Bond: ....No...

Goldfinger: Please?

James Bond, repulsed: No!

Goldfinger: It's made of gold!
 
goldfinger.jpg

GOLDFINGER: "If I make this next hole, you buy da booze and da b1tches. Deal?"
BOND: "Deal."
 

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