The Neurodiversity Thread

[Lily Adler]

A thread for neurodivergence and the neurotypicals who want to know more.

 

[squeekness]

Sad, but I had to look those up. My daughter has Aspergers or is "on the spectrum" as many others say, and she would qualify as neurodivergent. She's in her 30s now and settled some, but her mental state is more like an early teen. Her childhood was rough because that was before we knew so much about this stuff. They kept calling her "developmentally delayed" for years before the word autistic finally came out. Youngsters these days have it better than she did because we know more now.

 

[Silvermoth]

I have Asperger’s. It’s not something I tell a lot of people, not because I’m ashamed but because some people act badly when they hear it and I can’t be bothered with that.

I have to be honest I like having Asperger’s. I don’t miss what I never had and some of the people I see on the other end who are like, mega extroverts don’t always seem that happy to me

 

[squeekness]

My daughter is a generally happy person as well. Her stress comes primarily from dealing with other people who aren't as accepting and I totally get that. Most of her social life is online where a lot of people feel freer about being mean.

 

[ComicChick]

My daughter is a generally happy person as well. Her stress comes primarily from dealing with other people who aren't as accepting and I totally get that. Most of her social life is online where a lot of people feel freer about being mean.

sadly it's easy for people to hide behind a monitor and be evil

 

[Silvermoth]

My parents recommended a British show called ‘a kind of spark’ which is about a girl with autism with a fixation on witches. It’s quite good actually! Worth checking out if you want

 

[JoshB1980]

The most neurodiverse thing about me is that I have Asperger's Syndrome. I was diagnosed in 2013, at age 33, and was told there is no cure - apparently, its something you're born with. So over the past 11 years, I've been try to find various ways of coping with it, but it hasn't been easy.

 

[Hobgoblin]

I’m bipolar and have ADHD. I don’t like the inclusion of “hyperactive” to the name, it doesn’t apply to me. I was diagnosed as bipolar twenty years ago and after so much time I really feel like I have it under control. It’s nothing like when I was diagnosed. The ADD is a different story. It’s wrecked havoc with every job I’ve ever had. People don’t want explanations, they only see excuses. It sounds ridiculous to say that I’m not in control of my own brain.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

I'm a late diagnosed ADHDer. Also not 'hyper' (at least physically). Got the official diagnosis 3 years ago, ADHD inattentive type.

Was looking back at old posts on here the other day and this showed up... It actually made me sad, remembering how confused I was back then without the answers I have now.

On the plus side, I'm a therapist now, often working with ND folk, and that shared understanding of the struggles of life pre & post knowledge is very useful.

 

[Hobgoblin]

Oh yes, I absolutely share your pain.

Do you ever have an intelligent conversation with someone that obviously thought you were an idiot? Their shock is very revealing.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

Oh yes, I absolutely share your pain.

Do you ever have an intelligent conversation with someone that obviously thought you were an idiot? Their shock is very revealing.

I think I get it more the other way around. Like people think I'm intelligent, then are shocked when I do/say dumb things

 

[Hobgoblin]

That’s true too. It’s always “will this be a good day or bad day?”

 

[ComicChick]

I'm a late diagnosed ADHDer. Also not 'hyper' (at least physically). Got the official diagnosis 3 years ago, ADHD inattentive type.

On the plus side, I'm a therapist now, often working with ND folk, and that shared understanding of the struggles of life pre & post knowledge is very useful.

View attachment 85759

that's awesome.
I've always said that if i took a test for ADHD, I'd pass.

 

[squeekness]

that's awesome.
I've always said that if i took a test for ADHD, I'd pass.

I probably would, too. Or at least be borderline.

 

[Cap2024]

I have Asperger’s. It’s not something I tell a lot of people, not because I’m ashamed but because some people act badly when they hear it and I can’t be bothered with that.

I have to be honest I like having Asperger’s. I don’t miss what I never had and some of the people I see on the other end who are like, mega extroverts don’t always seem that happy to me

That’s exactly like me.

Aspergers. I relate a lot to Spock.

I favor thinking of things from a more logical, statistical, or business rather than emotional standpoint.

While I’m a screenwriter, for me I’ve always likened that to another form of math. Similarly to how many regard music as akin to math.

I’d say one of the best things to ever happen to me is finding a boyfriend and future husband who has aspergers as well. Our connection was instant whereas my walls for most other people are always up. That’s part of what told me that he’s the one.

The whole rigid thinking part comes through in seeing things as right or wrong. I can’t even listen to Trump’s voice without getting a literal headache. He is so morally backwards that hearing him speak is literally painful, like cats scratching on a chalkboard.

 

[Silvermoth]

Yeah I remember when he lost last time I was like “oh good we won’t have to hear that stupid voice again”

Ah well

 

[The Question]

I have the one-two punch of autism and ADHD. Jesus, it's rough. The worst part, symptomatically speaking, is the sensory hell and the inconsistent energy levels. Socially, the worst part is when people treat me like a dog: tons of love and affection, but also people acting like I need to be trained and conditioned, and acting like it's okay to talk about me like I'm not in the room.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

I have the one-two punch of autism and ADHD. Jesus, it's rough. The worst part, symptomatically speaking, is the sensory hell and the inconsistent energy levels. Socially, the worst part is when people treat me like a dog: tons of love and affection, but also people acting like I need to be trained and conditioned, and acting like it's okay to talk about me like I'm not in the room.

Sorry you have to deal with that, people can be so clueless in their attempts to 'help'.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

So I have this thing about lists/spreadsheets/catalogues. I LOVE making them. They hit my hyper focus sweet spot.

For example, back in Feb, I spontaneously decided to research Japan for a holiday. After 8 hours straight of creating folders, sub folders and saving content (I.e. Links and pics) I ended up with this:



I have not looked at it since. I have no where near enough money to go to Japan.

But it was fun for a day. My kind of fun anyway

 

[The Question]

Sorry you have to deal with that, people can be so clueless in their attempts to 'help'.

Worst part is when the love and affection abruptly stops when you insist on being treated like a person instead of a Paris Hilton purse dog.

 

[Spider-Fan]

I have a daughter who is going to be 4 that is autistic. We recently started in home and pre-school services for her. The wife and I are trying to learn anything we can in our efforts to parent her better, so if any of yall have anything you know that benefitted you guys when you were younger, let me know! I am essentially willing to try anything that may help her out in the long run

 

[The Question]

I have a daughter who is going to be 4 that is autistic. We recently started in home and pre-school services for her. The wife and I are trying to learn anything we can in our efforts to parent her better, so if any of yall have anything you know that benefitted you guys when you were younger, let me know! I am essentially willing to try anything that may help her out in the long run

Rule 1 for parenting an autistic child: They're always listening. It is easy to assume that when autistic people go non-verbal, they shut the rest of the world out. This is not the case. In my experience, that's when I'm the MOST aware of my surroundings. If your child is in the room and you're talking about them, include them in the conversation. There's not much that's more dehumanizing than people talking about you as if you're not in the room. If it's something that you really can't include your kid in talking about, like complex medical or financial stuff that relates to them, don't have those conversations while the child is anywhere within earshot. But also remember that every year that goes by, your child will be more and more capable of engaging in those conversations. What's okay to talk about behind someone's back when they're 4 isn't okay to talk about behind their back when they're 10 or 15 or an adult.

 

[Spider-Fan]

Rule 1 for parenting an autistic child: They're always listening. It is easy to assume that when autistic people go non-verbal, they shut the rest of the world out. This is not the case. In my experience, that's when I'm the MOST aware of my surroundings. If your child is in the room and you're talking about them, include them in the conversation. There's not much that's more dehumanizing than people talking about you as if you're not in the room. If it's something that you really can't include your kid in talking about, like complex medical or financial stuff that relates to them, don't have those conversations while the child is anywhere within earshot. But also remember that every year that goes by, your child will be more and more capable of engaging in those conversations. What's okay to talk about behind someone's back when they're 4 isn't okay to talk about behind their back when they're 10 or 15 or an adult.

She isn't entirely verbal as of yet. Mostly parrots back phrases and such. But those skills are improving. One of the works in progress. We are also working on teaching her to wait and do simple tasks via a reward system right now that the BHTs that are working with her started incorporating. I do know she seems to learn even if she is doing other stuff. If I pause her Paw Patrol and she is playing with toys and not even looking at the TV, she instantly notices it stopped. That and she has clearly learned several things from watching Dinosaur Train and such. So that checks out

 

[The Question]

Also, applied behavioral analysis therapy is TERRIBLE for autism. It's only focused on correcting behavior, not managing symptoms. In practice, it's not much different from dog training. If any specialist suggests it, seek a second opinion.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

Yeah there's a lot of out dated/harmful information still out there sadly.

My main recommendation would be to try and stick to information either written/presented by someone who is autistic, or is highly approved by the autistic community.

Here's a list someone compiled of books that are 'positive' information - it was sent to me by a colleague:

Best 150+ books on Autism

Reviews and recommendations of the best Autism Positive books written by Autistic people and Autistic allies.

theautisticadvocate.com