The Pengiun Diet

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Ya know, Penguins drink ice cold water and their body has to warm it up. Doing so burns calories. It's a scientific FACT, like in The Bible or something.

Drinking lots of water also:

~Improves Your Energy
~Increases Your Mental and Physical Performance
~Removes Toxins & Waste Products from your body
~Keeps Skin Healthy and Glowing
~Helps You Lose Weight
~Reduces Headaches and Dizziness
~Allows for proper Digestion
~Helps to keep you more Alkaline
~Relieves constipation
~Helps to maintain proper muscle tone

I want glowing skin, don't you? Plus, water makes your fat cells less rubbery. Incaseyadidn'tknow, rubbery fat cells = hard to get rid of. Bad stuff.

When you don't get enough, your blood literally becomes thicker, like tomato soup. You also are thirsty, have sunken eyes, absence of tears when crying vigorously, and are restless and irritable. What a jerk you must be. Your pee is also dark and smelly. EW!

Water cleanses your system. Water is next to cleanliness, which is next to godliness. Water is Godly.

Join me in drinking nothing but water all the live long day! Post your results and I'll write a book about this foolproof diet. I have to pee like 17 times a day and never don't have the sensation of having to micturate, but my pee is clear and pristine. Good enough to bottle and drink. Sure, the first few times I peed it was brown and sludgy and full of toxins, but eventually it turns into spring water flowing from my vag.

You can eat fish or something for energy. :up:
 
I thought this was a thread about eating penguins.

penguin0dn.jpg
 

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I'm now hungry for a hamburger. :(
 
You mean Penguinburger. MMMMMM. Penguin *drool*
 
I'm thinking we're straying too far from the source material here, folks.
 
pavlovs dogfood said:
Sure, the first few times I peed it was brown and sludgy and full of toxins, but eventually it turns into spring water flowing from my vag.

You can eat fish or something for energy. :up:

Stick to posting sexy pictures.
 
pavlovs dogfood said:
Sure, the first few times I peed it was brown and sludgy and full of toxins, but eventually it turns into spring water flowing from my vag.

Welcome to my sig:up:
 
pavlovs dogfood said:
Sure, the first few times I peed it was brown and sludgy and full of toxins, but eventually it turns into spring water flowing from my vag.

Pee comes out of your urethra, not your "vag".
 
You know, potato po-tah-toe, dude.

The vag is all encompassing. Believe me, I know; I have one.

Stick to posting sexy pictures.

I thought you hated that????????????????????????????
 
Killgore said:
I thought this was a thread about eating penguins.

penguin0dn.jpg


ME TOO. :confused:

OF COURSE, DEW'S GOING TO BAN YOU FOR THAT PIC. :O
 
pavlovs dogfood said:
You know, potato po-tah-toe, dude.

The vag is all encompassing. Believe me, I know; I have one.



I thought you hated that????????????????????????????

Who the hell says po-tah-to?
 
What? Don't give up like that, the gauntlet's been thrown; if we need to fisticuffs, let that be that. Let's dance.
 
pavlovs dogfood said:
I thought you hated that????????????????????????????

I actually like it but I have to maintain a disaffected facade or people won't like me:confused::(
 
Oh all right...

pavlovs dogfood said:
The vag is all encompassing.

That's exactly what I've heard said down at the docks!

bah-dum-BUM!
 
Don't you mean the payoff wasn't half as good as the buildup? :confused:
 
Get a room you two! Or three counting JLBats.
 

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