We be chillin'... wait, what?!

[Master Chief]

So. I was channel surfing this morning and I saw these farmers, and they all looked like they wanted to stab me in the throat after raping me until I remembered, hey, I'm not a chick so that won't happen. Anyway, aside from that they... I don't know what they did, but they like, moved their hats. So they're not wearing them properly. Like, if they wanted the hat to shade their eyes it wouldn't shade their eyes, it'd shade their ears, or the area on their forehead between their eye and ear, and then they started uh. Rapping. About milk going straight to my bones or something, from the farm to the fridge.

Now normally this wouldn't bother me, but if it's going from the farm to the fridge then where the hell are my bones? When does the milk come to my bones? Anyway. They had these asian people womens and black people womens all dancing in slow motion and they had all these trippy lights and stuff and this one who looked like he got hit by a truck but was still trying to dance and could only do a poor robot on his crooked legs, and people randomly backflipping off of hay stacks. It confused me. I realized maybe an hour later that they were trying to make it look like some rap video.

I didn't know what they were advertising until that milk thing comes and it's like, "Does it get any cooler than this?" ...Are they being serious or what? Why are they advertising milk like this?

 

[Alexia Dark]

I don't know. Damn you, corporate ****e farmers of Ontario.

 

[C. Lee]

Why are they advertising milk like this?

Because....the only way to get the attention of kids today is to act stupid?

 

[Alexia Dark]

Because....the only way to get the attention of kids today is to act stupid?

And there is the real answer.

 

[JLBats]

We know what you want,
Cuz we know how you live



The milk rap owns you:anger, unending anger:

 

[Mee]

So are they changing it to "GOT MILK SON!?!"

 

[C. Lee]

I bet rappin' farmer isn't as good as "Rally's" rap-cat commercials.

 

[Master Chief]

lol, rap cat rules.

Because....the only way to get the attention of kids today is to act stupid?

Your wisdom has no limits, but I'm a kid of today and the furthest thing from my mind was drinking milk. Isn't that what advertising is for?

 

[Lackey]

I love milk

 

[The Shape]

Who cares? It's milk.

 

[Carter]

Speaking of milk, I was thinking the other night during one of my Tylenol PM induced comas, that we should drink people milk instead of cow milk.
Why the **** am I drinking milk from a cow?

Cows don't drink people milk.

So then I started to think that people would drink milk from a woman only if she were attractive.
So here's what you do:

Since one woman obviously can't provide milk for the entire nation, you get a bunch of women. And you milk all of them. Put it in cartons and sell it.

But you put a picture of each woman on the side. So if you think this particular chick is butt ugly, you don't buy that carton.

 

[C. Lee]

lol, rap cat rules.


Your wisdom has no limits, but I'm a kid of today and the furthest thing from my mind was drinking milk. Isn't that what advertising is for?

Until you saw this commercial...MILK wasn't in your mind whatsoever....NOW, you have thought about it.....over days and weeks as you repeatedly watch this commercial....you will think about it more and more.....you are already talking about it on the Hype...next you will google for Milk Jokes......then one day...when you least expect it...you will open the fridge for a cola.....and you will see a big cold jug of beautiful milk.....one sip you will say, just one sip won't be so bad.....then it will be half a glass...surely a half a glass of cold healthy milk won't hurt......within two weeks you will be up to a quart a day...A QUART.....sure, you'll think you can handle it...you'll think that you can control it....but it will control you.....yes sir....you'll be out doing odd jobs, liks mowing the neighbors yard, or helping the old widow lady down the block bring in her groceries just to get milk money.......I've seen it before son.....be prepared.

 

[terry78]

I enjoy when people that normally don't rap attempt to do so. They're still doing it in the 1980's style of rap, which has been redundant for quite a minute.

 

[jaguarr]

Until you saw this commercial...MILK wasn't in your mind whatsoever....NOW, you have thought about it.....over days and weeks as you repeatedly watch this commercial....you will think about it more and more.....you are already talking about it on the Hype...next you will google for Milk Jokes......then one day...when you least expect it...you will open the fridge for a cola.....and you will see a big cold jug of beautiful milk.....one sip you will say, just one sip won't be so bad.....then it will be half a glass...surely a half a glass of cold healthy milk won't hurt......within two weeks you will be up to a quart a day...A QUART.....sure, you'll think you can handle it...you'll think that you can control it....but it will control you.....yes sir....you'll be out doing odd jobs, liks mowing the neighbors yard, or helping the old widow lady down the block bring in her groceries just to get milk money.......I've seen it before son.....be prepared.

He's gonna OD on milk and die of phlegm.

jag

 

[Mee]

I enjoy when people that normally don't rap attempt to do so. They're still doing it in the 1980's style of rap, which has been redundant for quite a minute.

Popo-zao.

 

[Alpha and Omega]

He's gonna OD on milk and die of phlegm.

Or try to drink a gallon in an hour.

"Does it get any cooler than this?"

This question is there to confuse you. You want to answer, "yes. Yes it does," but you're so mesmerized by the nonsensical structure of the commercial that you just end up focusing on it for an extended period.

See for yourself; the next time it comes on your screen, you'll watch it w/ more fascination.

Unfortunately, watching these comes at the expense of iq hit points. I'm at -35.​

 

[JLBats]

Speaking of milk, I was thinking the other night during one of my Tylenol PM induced comas, that we should drink people milk instead of cow milk.
Why the **** am I drinking milk from a cow?

Cows don't drink people milk.

So then I started to think that people would drink milk from a woman only if she were attractive.
So here's what you do:

Since one woman obviously can't provide milk for the entire nation, you get a bunch of women. And you milk all of them. Put it in cartons and sell it.

But you put a picture of each woman on the side. So if you think this particular chick is butt ugly, you don't buy that carton.

How about it comes in a boob shaped bottle?

 

[Master Chief]

Or try to drink a gallon in an hour.



This question is there to confuse you. You want to answer, "yes. Yes it does," but you're so mesmerized by the nonsensical structure of the commercial that you just end up focusing on it for an extended period.

See for yourself; the next time it comes on your screen, you'll watch it w/ more fascination.

Unfortunately, watching these comes at the expense of iq hit points. I'm at -35.

I dont' watch much TV but damn, these stupid commercials. Old Navy, Milk, and I was going to make one on brinks home security but that's for another day.

Until you saw this commercial...MILK wasn't in your mind whatsoever....NOW, you have thought about it.....over days and weeks as you repeatedly watch this commercial....you will think about it more and more.....you are already talking about it on the Hype...next you will google for Milk Jokes......then one day...when you least expect it...you will open the fridge for a cola.....and you will see a big cold jug of beautiful milk.....one sip you will say, just one sip won't be so bad.....then it will be half a glass...surely a half a glass of cold healthy milk won't hurt......within two weeks you will be up to a quart a day...A QUART.....sure, you'll think you can handle it...you'll think that you can control it....but it will control you.....yes sir....you'll be out doing odd jobs, liks mowing the neighbors yard, or helping the old widow lady down the block bring in her groceries just to get milk money.......I've seen it before son.....be prepared.

I used to drink lots of milk 'cause I liked cereal and stuff, and I couldn't really eat cereal without milk 'cause the cereal would make my fingers all sticky and stuff so. But. The commercial doesn't make me want milk. It makes me wonder if you can really install hydraulics on a tractor with shocks that can withstand a 300 pound man sitting in it.

 

[SoulManX]

How about it comes in a boob shaped bottle?

Sold...I will take 2 bottles and bring them around back.


Don't want the neighbors to see.