You know you're drunk when...

[knowsbleed]

You know you're drunk when you spend a good full 5 seconds trying to screw that stubborn cap off your vodka bottle only to realize, there is no cap on the vodka bottle.

You know you're drunk when you spend 2 minutes searching for another beer in the fridge, and go sit back down without a drink because you forgot what you were doing in the fridge.

You know you're drunk when you can't tell if you've had too much to drink or the rope around your neck and balls is really too tight and you're legitimately getting light headed.

You know you are drunk when you stumble blindly into the bathroom at a packed Angels stadium, only to notice that there are no urinals on the wall... so you trip your way in to the stall, take a giant LOUD wizz, and stumble out to the sink only to look over at a line of women staring at you.



Share please.

 

[LiveWire777]

when u go to a taco bell at 4 in the morning and spend 15 dollars -_-'

 

[THE MR. TERRIFIC]

 

[StorminNorman]

You know you're drunk when you realize you have no left shoe and then proceed to stick your foot in every red cup on the ground hoping they will turn into one.

 

[StorminNorman]

when u go to a taco bell at 4 in the morning and spend 15 dollars -_-'

That's when you know you are high.

 

[knowsbleed]

You know you're drunk when you attempt to ride a bicycle that is still hanging on vertical bicycle rack.

 

[LiveWire777]

That's when you know you are high.

ha someone should make a thread for that t:

 

[Mr. Credible]

... When it's 5am, and you're in the middle of a heated game of strip UNO wearing your boxers, fuzzy white slippers, and your roommate's night vision goggles.

 

[StorminNorman]

 

[Star]

You know you're drunk when you start swimming in the fountain in front of the local catholic church

 

[Mr. Credible]

... Then you stand up dramatically, slam down a 'draw 4' card, and slap your friend in the mouth.

Then walk away from the table.

 

[AlteredEgo]

... Then you stand up dramatically, slam down a 'draw 4' card, and slap your friend in the mouth.

Then walk away from the table.

you're a mean drunk.

 

[LiveWire777]

you know ur drunk when u call your mom at about 3 to ask her how you pronounce the song "como la flor" by Selena.

 

[Majic Walrus]

You know you're drunk when you're telling yourself, "I'm sober enough to drive." Because at that point in time you've had to think about it.

 

[TheFuture]

You know you are drunk when glasses/bottles start to slip out of your hand and smash on the floor.

You know you are drunk when the taxi-men/women refuse to allow you into the car.

You know you are drunk when you have the sudden urge to let rip at people.

Oh and of course when you start making the crazy phone calls and texts at all hours.

 

[The Lizard]

You know you're drunk when that crazy, needy, emotionally unstable girl you swore to stay far away from is lookin' pretty damn good all of a sudden.

 

[TheFuture]

You know you're drunk when that crazy, needy, emotionally unstable girl you swore to stay far away from is lookin' pretty damn good all of a sudden.

Oh I've been there man. I remember there was this one specific girl that chased me and I her turned down on multiple occasions. Then on one Halloween I was totally out of my face and lonely. I saw her and chanced my arm, *****ure that she would say yes. She said no, she sure did get her own back on me for all the rejections that night!

 

[darkseid26]

you know you are drunk, when you and your friends are sitting in a circle singing the theme songs to your favorite cartoons from the 90's

 

[knowsbleed]

You know you're drunk when it's all of a sudden a good idea to start punching your buddies... but they don't think it's such a good idea and "return the favor" just a taaad bit harder... in your nutsack.

 

[bunk]

You know you're drunk when you start laughing like Ray Liotta in Goodfellas.

 

[knowsbleed]

You know you're drunk when you start laughing like Ray Liotta in Goodfellas and then you snortle... and people say, "Did you just snortle?" and you just snortle some more.

 

[ross2287]

You blast Coldplay and dance unabashedly.

You tilt your head back and close your eyes and it feels like you're on a roller coaster. Then you promptly start laughing.

You steal things.

You throw traffic cones off a bridge.

(I've done all of these things.)

 

[knowsbleed]

You blast Coldplay and dance unabashedly.

You tilt your head back and close your eyes and it feels like you're on a roller coaster. Then you promptly start laughing.

You steal things.

You throw traffic cones off a bridge.

(I've done all of these things.)

I've done the bold... and I don't like the whirly twirly feeling... that's not a good buzz to me. That's the kind of buzz where I need to stop. A good buzz for me is good times to gooder times.

I stole a Christmas tree.

We were so baaad.

 

[Prison Mike]

you know you're drunk when...you type like JAL

Spoiler

kidding JAL!

 

[ross2287]

You know you're drunk when you start laughing like Ray Liotta in Goodfellas and then you snortle... and people say, "Did you just snortle?" and you just snortle some more.

You know your'e drunk when you use the word "snortle" 3 times or more in one post.