A Gang of 5th Graders are Gunning for You: How Many Can You Take Out?

[Quietstorm]

Scene:

You getting off from work, you're school teacher and it's close to the holidays. As you're on your way home a gang of disgruntled students approach you, 10 deep and growing, and it's only you and them on the streets. They're pissed because you didn't give them a homework pass and some of them failed their semester exams. The situation is beginning to look like a scene out of Lord of The Flies or The Warriors. They can smell blood.

What do you do? No weapons are involved but you got to defend yourself and make it home in time to wrap presents. How many of them can you take out before it's over, or can you dispose of them one by one effortlessly? Btw they know where you live, so you better show 'em who's boss.

GO!

 

[NewYorkSpider]

Yell *MICHAEL JACKSON* really loud, point to someplace and run like hell.

 

[Quietstorm]

Yell *MICHAEL JACKSON* really loud, point to someplace and run like hell.

They know where you live.

 

[Mee]

Grab one of em, rip his arm off, and beat the others with it.

 

[NewYorkSpider]

They know where you live.

It doesn't say that up there.

 

[Sam18]

Try to make an example out of one of them. If that doesn't scare them off then I'd run like hell. Pretty sure I can outrun 5th graders.

 

[Quietstorm]

It doesn't say that up there.

Now it does

 

[NewYorkSpider]

Do I have a cell phone?

 

[The Incredible Hulk]

simple. I go "chimpanzee" on their asses and beat one senseless while screaming wildly then I poo in my hand and fling it at the rest of them. 5th graders HATE poo....

 

[Abaddon]

7.

 

[Drizzle]

I would take them all out, "American History X" style. Make 'em bite the curb. Take no prisoners.

 

[bullets]

http://forums.superherohype.com/showthread.php?t=290128&highlight=defense

 

[Quietstorm]

Do I have a cell phone?

Yep. You can call for back if you must.

 

[Colossal Spoons]

simple. I go "chimpanzee" on their asses and beat one senseless while screaming wildly then I poo in my hand and fling it at the rest of them. 5th graders HATE poo....

Beautiful

 

[Lighthouse]

I shove my hands in my ass via Brodie Bruce, and try to put my hands on their faces. I might die, but they're going home smelling like ass!

 

[Capt Throbberson]

Unzip your pants, they'll scatter.

 

[Gilpesh]

I would unleash the warrior on them. Probably grab one by the legs and spin around smacking the crap outta a bunch of them and hopefully giving the one kid I grabbed brain damage.

 

[bell110]

How big are these fifth graders? Are they super human?

 

[Arc-Light]

I would unleash him

 

[DV8]

I would also grab one by the legs and spin him/her around, knocking the others to their demise . . .

 

[SouLeSS]

I'd laugh, and if they actually started attacking me, I'd probably just smash one of their faces open with my fist, so they back down.

Now, if they're some kind of rabbid zombie 5th graders with enhanced speed and strength, I'd pull out my trust katana I always have in my trunk, for just such an occasion. And yes, I do have a zombie plan, and that's a pretty large part of it.

 

[Quietstorm]

How big are these fifth graders? Are they super human?

Have you seen fifth graders nowadays? They're mutants

 

[Alex The Great]

Scene:

You getting off from work, you're school teacher and it's close to the holidays. As you're on your way home a gang of disgruntled students approach you, 10 deep and growing, and it's only you and them on the streets. They're pissed because you didn't give them a homework pass and some of them failed their semester exams. The situation is beginning to look like a scene out of Lord of The Flies or The Warriors. They can smell blood.

What do you do? No weapons are involved but you got to defend yourself and make it home in time to wrap presents. How many of them can you take out before it's over, or can you dispose of them one by one effortlessly? Btw they know where you live, so you better show 'em who's boss.

GO!

say i'm a friend of chuck norris. they run like hell.

 

[Asteroid-Man]

Grab one of em, rip his arm off, and beat the others with it.

That's good but personally I'm a into soccer not baseball so I'd take a head and boot it around.

 

[Pythenis]

How ironic.....It always been a dream of mine to fight gangs of 5th graders, and now there is a thread about it??? Except in my dream there all over developed Japanese school girls and I am in a canary yellow thong with a shaggy mustache ,combat boots, and carrying a ghetto blaster that I place on the ground and turn up to 11 before we throw down, it's playing Whip-it by Devo. Then it starts raining...no a cool rain but a moist warm tropical rain and all the girls makeup runs. Then I face the teacher, Mrs. Crabtree,..but she's no Japanese she's from Sweden...and talks in a thick accent and has chocolate all over her body. Then an elephant walks by and tips his big sombrero with his trunk and winks at me. Thats when I lock up with Mrs. Crabtree and she can keep her lip from quivering as she eventually gives in and we make love on a nest of fire ants.......How ironic?