Bullied or Over-Sensitive?

[Doctor Evo]

That remark drips with zero perspective.

Everyone has been bullied in some form or another.

I haven't read through the rest of the thread (I've skimmed it), but have you defined "bullying," yet?

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

I haven't read through the rest of the thread (I've skimmed it), but have you defined "bullying," yet?

I really haven't made much of an attempt to, no. I think the thread is more or less about where that line is drawn. You're welcome to present one.

 

[TheBat812]

bul·ly 1 (b

l

)
n. pl. bul·lies 1. A person who is habitually cruel or overbearing, especially to smaller or weaker people.
2. A hired ruffian; a thug.
3. A pimp.
4. Archaic A fine person.
5. Archaic A sweetheart.

v. bul·lied, bul·ly·ing, bul·lies
v.tr. 1. To treat in an overbearing or intimidating manner. See Synonyms at intimidate.
2. To make (one's way) aggressively.

v.intr. 1. To behave like a bully.
2. To force one's way aggressively or by intimidation




It seems important to the definition that it is repeatedly one offender, not just random people poking fun at you. It's a lot easier said than done to ignore somebody who's seeking you out to give you **** on a very consistent basis no matter how you react. Brushing it off is probably most people's first reaction, but I'm sure after awhile it grows beyond that, especially when you're a kid.

 

[Edguy]

Sure, I agree words do hurt, but from my experience if you want to survive in the world, having a thick skin about what gets said to you is sort of a necessity. Most people perform "sh** tests" on people. A good example is women and men. Women will sh** test a guy sometimes just to see if he can "take it", because the last thing anyone wants is someone who folds like a cheap accordion anytime they get called some mean name.

So what do you think? Do you think all bullying is reprehensible, or perhaps that there are certain forms of bullying that are helpful to normal development.

I've never really been bullied, but i had some buddies in primary school and junior high school that were pretty big *****ebags to everyone, and their closer friends in particular, and I truly believe that has made me a better person. You're gonna really have to work for it if you wanna break down my psyche now!

 

[Doctor Evo]

bul·ly 1 (b

l

)
n. pl. bul·lies 1. A person who is habitually cruel or overbearing, especially to smaller or weaker people.
2. A hired ruffian; a thug.
3. A pimp.
4. Archaic A fine person.
5. Archaic A sweetheart.

v. bul·lied, bul·ly·ing, bul·lies
v.tr. 1. To treat in an overbearing or intimidating manner. See Synonyms at intimidate.
2. To make (one's way) aggressively.

v.intr. 1. To behave like a bully.
2. To force one's way aggressively or by intimidation




It seems important to the definition that it is repeatedly one offender, not just random people poking fun at you. It's a lot easier said than done to ignore somebody who's seeking you out to give you **** on a very consistent basis no matter how you react. Brushing it off is probably most people's first reaction, but I'm sure after awhile it grows beyond that, especially when you're a kid.

Does it need to be one repeat offender, or even a single group, to be considered bullying, though? There could be a scenario where outside observers see someone being bullied, see that it elicits a positive response from others, and join in as a result, even though the two people/groups really have no connection to one another. It seems to me that this could result in a group mentality that grows across personal and social boundaries so that, for instance, an entire school could be participating in the activity.

I think I've seen something like this happen before.

 

[TheBat812]

Does it need to be one repeat offender, or even a single group, to be considered bullying, though? There could be a scenario where outside observers see someone being bullied, see that it elicits a positive response from others, and join in as a result, even though the two people/groups really have no connection to one another. It seems to me that this could result in a group mentality that grows across personal and social boundaries so that, for instance, an entire school could be participating in the activity.

I think I've seen something like this happen before.

yes, very true. Although I didn't mean one individual offender, but one entity. Should've clarified that, my bad. You're right though.


however, I would hardly say Christie is being "bullied", as the tone is usually humorous, not an "overbearing or intimidating" manner. I guess if people consider that bullying, than maybe it's actually Optimus who's using too broad of a definition of bullying as anything negative said about you, or maybe simply what I inferred from the context he provided.


And Optimus, I agree with that last point that some forms of bullying are just part of learning social boundaries and how to cope with things - ie, part of growing up. But it is important we define that, because there is also a way worse form of bullying that's simply not okay, which I know some people on this board HAVE experienced. You and I seem to have endured the former, less destructive form, while others have endured the latter. It is important to acknowledge that there IS a distinction.

 

[bullets]

With my experience of bulling, I'll say for the most part it's being over sensitive. Middle school I was bullied until I grew a thick skin and laugh it off in High School. Just learn how to make friends is key.

I think making friends is important. At least then you don't feel so alone. There's just a big divide on what level of bullying people on these boards have encountered.

 

[Kane52630]

I'll say that if your bulling goes to extreme levels like getting bruises and concussions ...you might want to call the police. Also it's not called being bullied, it's an assault.

 

[bullets]

I'll say that if your bulling goes to extreme levels like getting bruises and concussions ...you might want to call the police. Also it's not called being bullied, it's an assault.

That sounds simple enough , but in some these cases it doesn't always bruise right away or get taken seriously enough. I thought it was normal and blamed myself for not being big enough to fight these kids off. Also there's a bit of fear in ratting someone out. I told a teacher one time and instead of it helping I got ganged up on. I remember one time getting a hair cut and older kids were slapping the back of my head in the halls. Another time I got punched in the face for trying to sit next somebody on the bus. I told the bus driver and they said to sit somewhere else. The bus was crowded and you had three people to a seat because of this. So it all seemed relatively normal to me.

 

[Matt Mortem]

I used to get beat up all the time in elementary school. Teachers and administration never did anything so my mom moved me around schools a lot. The police were no help either, but that's because we were in a small town and the police force there consisted of all the grown up bullies. Seriously, those guys are Nazi's.

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

I used to get beat up all the time in elementary school. Teachers and administration never did anything so my mom moved me around schools a lot. The police were no help either, but that's because we were in a small town and the police force there consisted of all the grown up bullies. Seriously, those guys are Nazi's.

The only bullies I knew that ever found steady work found it as cops.

Just like they said in The Departed "some guys become cops just so they can smash a ****** head through a plate-glass window".

 

[Matt Mortem]

The only bullies I knew that ever found steady work found it as cops.

Just like they said in The Departed "some guys become cops just so they can smash a ****** head through a plate-glass window".

That was the entire police force in my hometown. I thought bullying would stop after school ended, but the police viciously harassed me. It got so bad that if I drove anywhere I knew I was going to get pulled over and questioned. I had to sell my car and move away to get away from those ****ers.

 

[MessiahDecoy123]

Is this a real question?

"No I won't stop beating you up and verbally abusing you.

It's your fault own my bullying is unpleasant because you're naturally sensitive. Make yourself genetically less sensitive because that's easier than me simply refraining from tormenting you sadistically."

 

[NickNitro]

Thank you, this is exactly how I feel.

 

[The Guard]

That's...not what the question was. That was not Optimus's original statement.

At all.

 

[MessiahDecoy123]

Then the thread title is misleading but probably a clear sign of OP's thinking process.

Here's the thing. A bully is not trained nore cares about the healthy development of a child or even an adult. They're sadistic thugs who aim at destroying the little self esteem a persona has left.

People act like they're brain surgeons who can break down and rebuild people's minds but really they do their "brain surgery" with axes and hacksaws.

They're terribly unqualified to help themselves let alone their UNWILLING victims.

Better?

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

Then the thread title is misleading but probably a clear sign of OP's thinking process.

Well then read the first f***ing post.

Is that honestly hard for people to do?

 

[MessiahDecoy123]

Well then read the first f***ing post.

Is that honestly hard for people to do?

I addressed both the thread title and your OP.

Do you have anger issues or something?

 

[Victarion]

I think people who take their harassment beyond the school yard, to places like Facebook and Youtube, and even email, have transcended bullying. Wasting your time to insult and demean someone to that extent is stalking. At least on the school yard, both parties are sort of obligated to be there, hence I'd define that as bullying.

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

I addressed both the thread title and your OP.

Do you have anger issues or something?

No, you just made a personal dig at me in response to The Guard, who pointed out you clearly were fudging the point of the thread.

 

[Hotwire]

I'm not going to let myself but pulled back into another pointless debate with Optimus but, I'd like to reiterate my first post on this question.

Bullying is never justified. All it does it make someone else feel worse so that you can feel better. It's pure selfishness and there is no excuse for it. While it is true that people need a "thick skin" to survive, that does not mean that those who torment others should get a pass. The idea of people giving others a "s*** test" is just childish. There are grown up ways to test someone's mettle.

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

I think people who take their harassment beyond the school yard, to places like Facebook and Youtube, and even email, have transcended bullying. Wasting your time to insult and demean someone to that extent is stalking. At least on the school yard, both parties are sort of obligated to be there, hence I'd define that as bullying.

Yeah, this is actually illegal too. It's harassment at that point, probably should be treated as such.

I'm not familiar with how the legal system views it at this time, but say, for example, going to someone's house to continue to harass them about something would be illegal, could result in something like a restraining order. I don't see how Facebook would be treated as different, or Youtube, although there's probably not much precedent at this time to claim those as property (like a house or a phone) since they are technically communal grounds that people voluntarily use.

 

[C. Lee]

Well then read the first f***ing post.

Is that honestly hard for people to do?

Here's your first post -

The term "anti-Bullying" is big news these days, and we see a lot of people with powerful spokespersons coming forward against bullying, but to me it's a rather odd word to throw around.

The story that's on the first page, for example, went past bullying and right onto assault, something we have laws against. If the situation had involved two older individuals who were adults it just would've been called assault, not bullying. I also think this door swings both ways. When a kid gets shoved in a locker, or beaten up, we should not call that bullying or teasing, because I know a Judge, a lawyer and a police officer would all have different words for those things. Although I realize sometimes younger people assaulting each other is brushed aside as 'rough housing'. Something I find pretty stupid and thoughtless.

Though you hear many claim bullying is always wrong. This, I'm not so sure of. Sure, I agree words do hurt, but from my experience if you want to survive in the world, having a thick skin about what gets said to you is sort of a necessity. Most people perform "sh** tests" on people. A good example is women and men. Women will sh** test a guy sometimes just to see if he can "take it", because the last thing anyone wants is someone who folds like a cheap accordion anytime they get called some mean name.

So what do you think? Do you think all bullying is reprehensible, or perhaps that there are certain forms of bullying that are helpful to normal development.

All bullying is reprehensible.

Bullying is NEVER helpful to development.

The people who have no problems with bullying....were either never bullied or never saw someone being bullied or are a bully trying to justify their actions.

 

[Hotwire]

Here's your first post -

All bullying is reprehensible.

Bullying is NEVER helpful to development.

The people who have no problems with bullying....were either never bullied or never saw someone being bullied or are a bully trying to justify their actions.

Right on!

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

All bullying is reprehensible.

Bullying is NEVER helpful to development.

The people who have no problems with bullying....were either never bullied or never saw someone being bullied or are a bully trying to justify their actions.

Uh...no