Freakin' spiders in my house. What the hell do I do?

[SuperFerret]

The one thing is those spider bites resulted in necrosis which is quite rare. It is not systematic.

A small number of brown recluse bites do cause necrosis as well as systemic problems. Even then, any hemotoxin should be something to worry about.

 

[Mace Bloodstone]

This has been going on since last year, and it's getting worse.
And I'm not talking about, "Aww, look how cute that little guy is!" -
I'm talking about threatening-looking M-F'ers. They just look unpleasant and mean. They look like their sole purpose is to give me sleepless nights.

They're about this size:

... which, I know, it's not that intimidating, but these ****ers are crawling on my walls, on the floor, on the ceiling, and I even found several on the bed. I'm getting the growing suspicion that these bastards crawl on me while I'm sleeping, and the paranoia haunts my waking thoughts and dreams.

I don't care if they're God's creatures.
I don't believe in God.
I want these bastards dead in the most horrible way possible.
I want them screaming, crying, and obliterated.
I want them gone for GOOD.

Any cheap, non-expensive ideas?

I seriously can't take it.

 

[Mary Jane Watson]

yeah...

Spoiler

 

[Duke]

**** this thread.

exactly what I say.

 

[Mary Jane Watson]

Burn your house down. It's the only way to be sure*.


*I'm not being cheeky. I f'ing hate spiders, and want to see them all die.

Blow your house up. Those evil bastards are worth a few thousand grenades going off in the neighborhood.

Burn them. Burn them all.

 

[Duke]

Spiders deeply fried.

 

[Kane52630]

I find it funny how some of you are Spider-man fans yet you are terrified of spiders.

 

[Bubonic]

Spiders deeply fried.

 

[bored]

Subjugation of the eight-legged hellbeasts! I love it!

 

[Ultra Lantern]

I find it funny how some of you are Spider-man fans yet you are terrified of spiders.

Strange isn't it.

 

[Asteroid-Man]

Hit them with a rock!

 

[Ultra Lantern]

Hit them with a rock!

A very big rock.

 

[Metamorpho1977]

I bet they're great dipped in honey mustard sauce

 

[Ultra Lantern]

I bet they're great dipped in honey mustard sauce

 

[Asteroid-Man]

A very big rock.

Good 'ol Croc!

 

[Duke]

I bet they're great dipped in honey mustard sauce

and probably crunchy.

 

[Rhiannon]

I found two spiders in my house today. Beware-- this thread is cursed.

 

[Mace Bloodstone]

I bet they're great dipped in honey mustard sauce

honey mustard makes anything taste better!

 

[KevanG]

I find it funny how some of you are Spider-man fans yet you are terrified of spiders.

Personally I can think of no logical reason for me to be afraid of spiders. It makes no sense to me at all and I think they are pretty damn fascinating but if I see even a tiny one I freak the **** out.

 

[Bubonic]

I bet they're great dipped in honey mustard sauce

Never you mind honey mustard, cock sauce is the definitive spider dipping sauce!

 

[The Morningstar]

Call John Goodman

 

[Ultra Lantern]

I found two spiders in my house today. Beware-- this thread is cursed.

lol

 

[JAK®]

Bunch of irrational arachnophobes, they're part of the balance of things.
Eat mosquitoes.
They eat mosquitoes.

Seriously though I love that inherent human trait that pushes us to want to kill the things we hate and fear.
Such a weak, silly species.

His house is infested. He isn't just seeing one spider and freaking out.

 

[Ultra Lantern]

Rocketman's thread is turning into a spiderfest.

 

[Spider-Aziz]

Let them gather, jump between them naked and devour them thinking to yourself:
"I'm the man"
"I'll be the spider"
"I will surpass the spider"
And then you'll be able to climb walls