girl vs. friend but it's not that simple.

[Tangled Web]

One of my best friends used to like this girl who is in our english class. He liked her for a while and got wrapped up in it but I guess she wasn't on the same page. He was pretty down about it. He seemed upset. This girl is really cool so I have no ill will towards her.

Well, anyway, one day her and I were doing a group assignment in class. We were talking and making fun of our history teacher. After class, my friend goes up to me. He was clearly distraught but he pretended not to be. He said things like "Oh, you two look cute together" and "I can tell you like her". The thing is, I never have seen her like that. Especially since he had a huge crush on her.


The next day her and I presented in class. We worked well together. After class he tells me about how her and I have great chemistry and how he could tell that I have a crush on her by the way my eyes move or something equally rediculous. Again, it was easy to see that he was trying not to sound upset.

Like I said earlier, I've always thought about her as a friend. But on the other hand, I've been thinking; of all the girls at school, she's the only one I can imagine having a good relationship with. Her and I really get along well.


Well, if I did go for it and if she did like me back (he insists that she might) would I be a bad friend?

 

[NewYorkSpider]

It sounds like you two are like Peter Parker/Harry Osborn in SM1.

 

[Tangled Web]

I guess that would make me Harry?

 

[NewYorkSpider]

lol, yeah, my advice would be too find out if she is intrested in him. You should bring his name up in a conversation with her. If she sounds like she in intrested then maybe you should just be friends with her for awhile.

If she doesn't sound like she likes him you had better go for it.

 

[heypapajinx]

depends on how good of a friend you think he is.
you only live once kid, and i hate to tell you but most of the friends that you get in high school WONT be your friends afterwards.
you go your seperate ways, blah blah blah.

point being, if you see that you might have a more meaningful relationship with this girl than the friendship you have with this guy, than go for it.
but be prepared for the scorn of friends evil eye... it burns like no other.

 

[Tangled Web]

argh. Well, he said that she wasn't on the same page with him, so to speak. So I guess it's a possibility. But I don't know. He's a good friend and I"d hate to lose him.

 

[NewYorkSpider]

You should ask him if it would be a problem if you asked her out.

 

[Tangled Web]

He said he'd be fine with it. But I don't think he would completly be ok with it.

 

[arachnid-guy]

TW...I know exactly where you're coming from.

I had a friend who got jealous of the 'amount' of time I spent with his crush [and the apparent body language...].

I, myself, even went thru this phase for a time.

Basically, all you can do is tell him nothing's happening between you and this girl. That's all you can do, really. I mean, is it logical to cut all contact with this gal?

Your friend needs to realise both you and your friend will have friends of the opposite sex. It doesnt necessarily mean you want to go out with them. Maybe he thinks you are more confident with her- that your convo 'flows' or something- an that's something he lacks.

Imo, your mate is jealous- he'll eventually come to realise there's nothing between you two- only his green tinted glasses.

 

[Tangled Web]

TW...I know exactly where you're coming from.

I had a friend who got jealous of the 'amount' of time I spent with his crush [and the apparent body language...].

I, myself, even went thru this phase for a time.

Basically, all you can do is tell him nothing's happening between you and this girl. That's all you can do, really. I mean, is it logical to cut all contact with this gal?

Your friend needs to realise both you and your friend will have friends of the opposite sex. It doesnt necessarily mean you want to go out with them. Maybe he thinks you are more confident with her- that your convo 'flows' or something- an that's something he lacks.

Imo, your mate is jealous- he'll eventually come to realise there's nothing between you two- only his green tinted glasses.

I am definitley more confident with her than I am with other girls. I don't think that means I have feelings for her. I don't know what to think though.

 

[The Man Of 16]

Buddy I once had this happen. Last summer I was at this party, after a few drinks with a chick, we decided to go get freaky in the field (the house was FULL, and my buddy drove in his integra, which is too small). So after i call her up the next week. We get together, but then I got really sick, so i couldnt talk to her for a while.

I call her up the following week, she's going out with my buddy. (the one with the integra). Haven't been much of a friend with him lately. Lately as in since summer. I would advise against it. If youre buddy is just like a friend that you only talk to in class, go for it. But if you hang out with him like every couple days, I would advise against that.

 

[Mr. Credible]

One of my best friends used to like this girl who is in our english class. He liked her for a while and got wrapped up in it but I guess she wasn't on the same page. He was pretty down about it. He seemed upset. This girl is really cool so I have no ill will towards her.

Well, anyway, one day her and I were doing a group assignment in class. We were talking and making fun of our history teacher. After class, my friend goes up to me. He was clearly distraught but he pretended not to be. He said things like "Oh, you two look cute together" and "I can tell you like her". The thing is, I never have seen her like that. Especially since he had a huge crush on her.


The next day her and I presented in class. We worked well together. After class he tells me about how her and I have great chemistry and how he could tell that I have a crush on her by the way my eyes move or something equally rediculous. Again, it was easy to see that he was trying not to sound upset.

Like I said earlier, I've always thought about her as a friend. But on the other hand, I've been thinking; of all the girls at school, she's the only one I can imagine having a good relationship with. Her and I really get along well.


Well, if I did go for it and if she did like me back (he insists that she might) would I be a bad friend?

nope. he was never with her, and she was never his girlfriend... he'll get over it, at least he'd better, or he's a jerk, a cock-blocker, and a bad friend.

ps: don't tell her you're bi.

 

[Mister J]

I say go for it. There's no relationship between the two of them and chances are, as you embark upon your adult life, this guy won't matter, so whatever. She's not into him, so 'roll the dice' ...or whatever appropriate cliche.

 

[heypapajinx]

i think that you are more than old enough to know that many times when people say they're okay with something they are lying.
just brace yourself for him being upset with you and consider whether it's worth it or not before hand.
either way, you don't even know if she DOES want to date you!

 

[Mr. Credible]

i think that you are more than old enough to know that many times when people say they're okay with something they are lying.
just brace yourself for him being upset with you and consider whether it's worth it or not before hand.
either way, you don't even know if she DOES want to date you!

apparently, you haven't seen his photos.

 

[Kevin]

Okay, Your friend said he'd have no problem if anything were to happen between you and this girl? 1) He obviously could be lying, and 2) He should've been honest if he were a real friend and had a problem with it.

If she doesn't like him, but somehow likes you, and you think you could have a chance with her: Go for it. Your friend is no longer in the picture, even though he never was. Who is he to huff and puff? (Just saying in the future if something happens between you and the girl) He said he had no problem with it, and even if he did, he better get over it. Like it's said above, he has no claim over her.

 

[Kevin]

apparently, you haven't seen his photos.

So mean.

 

[Hades]

You should keep her in your pocket, where there's no way out.

That way nobody will know nothin'

 

[Kaleb]

It never is that simple

 

[heypapajinx]

apparently, you haven't seen his photos.

no.
no i haven't.
is he naked in them?
*hears jail cell bars closing*
uh ohhhhhh!!!!

 

[Mr. Credible]

no.
no i haven't.
is he naked in them?
*hears jail cell bars closing*
uh ohhhhhh!!!!

ew, no... he just looks like he's 8. maybe 7.

 

[Immortalfire]

Tell the dude you're bi, maybe he'll buzz off. lol

 

[heypapajinx]

ew, no... he just looks like he's 8. maybe 7.

hence the sounds of the JAIL CELL!!!

 

[Mr Sparkle]

Tangled web's life is like a boring Mexican soap opera.
stop doing that TW, at least like....make up stuff or some thing.

 

[Electrix]

A similar senario happen to me a year or two ago.

I liked this girl, had done for a while. I told my best mate that I liked her. A week later I go into lesson and see him flirting with her, so after I ask him WTF he was doing and he said he was just being friendly, so I said 'Okay' even though I wasnt entirely sure about it.
A week or two later, a few of us were going out to a friend house. As the girl lived near us she was going to walk with us. But at last minute I couldnt go for family reasons so it was just them two walking there. Later that night on MSN I was told they were holding hands while walking, and then let go when people saw them. I gave him a peice of my mind on MSN, but there is only so much you can do over the internet.

Somehow the girl found out a few days later. But liking the attention, she started to play us both. I knew that she didnt like me but I didnt like the fact that them two would get it together. It was out of spite I think, because your best mate going off with the girl you like kinda hurts.

So I told them both '**** you!'. My mate eventually got back with his ex. The girl went and got another boyfriend and still is with him today. Overtime me and my mate started talking and stuff and were alright now, but never like we were. I still think he is a total [insert curse here].

Theres another view of the 'love triangle'. I know your situation Tangled wont be exactly the same but similar. I hope my experience helps you to see it from his point of view a bit more