High School Memories

[Zumi]

Your 'smiley' says it all... *shudder* That story = w...t...f...

 

[Colossal Spoons]

In 5th and 6th grade, I went to a small Christian school.
They warned parents that they believed the teachers should be able to spank and punish the children.

The principal had a custom made, ornately decorated paddle that was huge, complete with holes to lessen air drag.

When he spanked a kid, they would be screaming and trying to run away, and he was so into it that he lost himself, he would curl his tongue under itself, and bite on his folded under tongue, like a little tongue sandwich....total sadism-freak face.

So, twice, after grueling interrogation in front of both classes, he decided that this girl, Tanya, had to be spanked.
He grabbed her arm, she was crying, he started whacking her so hard that I was shocked.......and.........I saw, because you couldn't help but notice, since his crotch was kind of more eye-level to us in our desks, that he got a FULL-ON ERECTION while whacking her.
So picture the dude, clamping down on his folded tongue, in a Joker-like grimace, a big tent in his Khakis, thwacking the **** out of this little girl.

:clears throat:

That sucks

 

[Eggyman]

In 5th and 6th grade, I went to a small Christian school.
They warned parents that they believed the teachers should be able to spank and punish the children.

The principal had a custom made, ornately decorated paddle that was huge, complete with holes to lessen air drag.

When he spanked a kid, they would be screaming and trying to run away, and he was so into it that he lost himself, he would curl his tongue under itself, and bite on his folded under tongue, like a little tongue sandwich....total sadism-freak face.

So, twice, after grueling interrogation in front of both classes, he decided that this girl, Tanya, had to be spanked.
He grabbed her arm, she was crying, he started whacking her so hard that I was shocked.......and.........I saw, because you couldn't help but notice, since his crotch was kind of more eye-level to us in our desks, that he got a FULL-ON ERECTION while whacking her.
So picture the dude, clamping down on his folded tongue, in a Joker-like grimace, a big tent in his Khakis, thwacking the **** out of this little girl.

*Reads higher power/God thread (or any thread concerning Christianity)*

It all makes sense now. Sorry dude

Although I do agree with what you say in those threads

 

[Wilhelm-Scream]

On Topic ...


We had a "Hootenanny", a talent show for the students and all the parents came.
My friend was a drummer, so I worked up a long sort of medley of some of my songs, taught the bass line to my other friend.
We played it, and I was Rocking out. Everyone was screaming and cheering. I was quite pleased.
I got to school the next day, and they told me I was suspended for two weeks, because my "dancing" was offensively "lewd"...and also, lol, we called the band, "Los Maricones"...which was funny because the principal announced all proudly, "And now...Los MARICONES!!!", without a clue as to what it meant. Hahaha



The school receptionist was having an affair with the assistant pastor. Her son was in the grade above mine.
When he found out, he went nuts, drank a bunch of booze, and they found him...he had shot himself in the head.
I was haunted by the fact that he had Guns 'n' Roses' "Appetite For Destruction" still playing when they found his body.



My friend had a ritual where he'd bring a 2 liter bottle of Sprite every Monday, for lunch, and on Thursday, there'd just be a little left, and he would take a big bite of each item in his lunch, and spit it into the bottle, then shake up the bottle and drink it.
A huge crowd always came every week to watch.
WTF?
That is sick.



The principals son was playing volleyball in P.E.
He jumped up to spike the ball, right as a guy on the other side jumped up to get it, and the other guy's knee bashed him in the groin, completely crushing one of his testicles.
They took him away for emergency surgery, and had to remove the testicle. It couldn't be saved.
But they implanted a rubber prosthetic ball, for "cosmetic reasons", and after that we all called him "Rubber Ball"....but ONLY behind his back.



In Biology, when we dissected the frogs, I took the skin off of my frog, rolled it up like a map, and put it into a little wooden bottle, and there it dried.



My dumbass friend who was so obsessed with Spider-Man that he actually ran through the halls trying to BE Spider-Man, striking poses, squatting on the floor, and ricocheting off of the lockers...in front of everybody....in Biology, one of the dissection tools, I believe they called it a "probe"...it was a little wooden dowel with a big needle in it...
He stole the probe from class, had it in his hand, after dissecting a frog...and he started flipping out, jumping through the halls (It looked more like the Beast than Spider-Man, since, he had no webs.), and he fell, and got up, and, lol, he stabbed himself in the chest with the probe needle.
It was just sticking there, with frog juice all over it, literally stuck half way into his sternum. lol



This same guy was such a spaz, that we got into a feud at one point, and he got so mad at me that he went to punch me, but he had a mechanical pencil in his hand, and the metal tip of it slashed my hand.
I looked at the cut, it hurt really bad, because, it didn't cut, it TORE the flesh.
It started bleeding profusely, and, lol, I went up to the office, looked at the nurse, and fainted...dead away, POW.
So, I woke up, to see a circle of my principal, the secretary, the nurse, and all of these worried girls, looking down at me.



whew...millions more stories. HS was great.

 

[hammy]

I also can't read these days.
It's very distressing.
It clearly says "High School Memories"...but I read it as "School Memories".

And the other day, in the thread about the girl who was slipped an abortion pill for cows, I thought of big pills, "Horse Pills", and later made a joke about Horse Abortions....only, it was Cow Abortion.


Must be sleep deprivation, I hope.

It's okay. I keep thinking it says, "High School Mammories."

 

[Masamune]

well im still in school so this is my memory.

 

[Wilhelm-Scream]

I'm so glad we didn't have the internet when I was in school.

 

[Alex The Great]

Talent Shows are the suck. but one time this hot girl did this AMAZING SONG. great voice and everything. it was perfect. Then, some idiot 3 year old who was with his parents who were there PULLED the fire alram. interuppting the sing and we all went out side. really bummed. she was great.

 

[michephantom]

Who remembers high school?

I'm 24 and I barely remember high school. Mostly because I didn't like it. People are idiots when they are kids. I also had a harder time because my dad was one of the most hated science teachers. Not only does that mean that I had to apologize to other kids (KID: "I had your dad as my teacher" ME: "I'm sorry") but every teacher knew me and I could never get in trouble or skip without him knowing.

One embarrassing moment was when I had class with a science teacher who shared an office with my dad. She was talking about genetics and recessive/dominant genes. According to her, crossing your hands with your right thumb over your left was recessive, and crossing your left over your right was dominant. Now, I knew both my parents crossed right over left; I crossed left over right, which should be impossible. I mentioned that in class to my teacher, and I suddenly realized that was like saying I was adopted or the milkman's daughter. So my teacher suddenly went into her office and came back out and said "Oops, you were wrong, he crosses his hands the other way!"

Now, there's no way I'm adopted or a b******** child, so obviously the teacher was wrong, and what kills me is that she'd rather have me look like an idiot that say she was wrong.

 

[michephantom]

The same teacher also had a pet dove she would let fly around class so it could poop on desks and perch on people's heads. It would also fly out of the class so she would have to go running through the hall to catch it. Filthy flying rat!

 

[hammy]

So many teachers suck.

 

[The Geek Vault]

So many teachers suck.

I agree, a lot of teachers take the easy way out and teach just as the text book says and keeps the generic teacher model. Where you learn things for a test and then forget it. there are a few great teachers though who teach life lessons along with the subject they are assigned to teach and they make you see what teaching is about.