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Here are some basic rules for survival, and also as a counterpoint, some assorted bits how to be a good horror movie girl who will surely die.
1. Don't bother with the big studly jock. He may be strong but he wont be able to do you any good when it matters.
2. Keep your clothes on. If you show your breasts, your ass or anything else, you will die.
3. Be nice. If you're the least bit *****y you will die. With the nice attitude, you have some chance of living, but barely.
4. Strike up a friendship or romance with the guy who is in good shape and at least has some intelligence. He will be able to rescue you when the psycho has you bound and gagged.
5. The only time you are allowed to panic is when the psycho has you in his clutches and the hero is coming to rescue you. Any other time and you're as good as buried.
6. When you're being pursued by the killer, never run upstairs. You won't come back down.
7. When you find your dead boyfriend, don't stand there screaming. The killer is right behind you.
8. Don't bother trying to call for help. The phone lines have been cut and your cell phone wont get a signal.
9. The police are no good. In fact, even if you manage to find one, they'll probably get shot or impaled while you're talking to them.
10. Never forget to overreact to everything.
11. Always feel something bad is going to happen.
12. Don't go investigate that noise in the backyard.
13. You can hide under the bed, table or desk. The killer usually doesn't look under there for some reason.
14. Don't stand over the supposedly dead killer for ten minutes and then run. Run immediately, and you might have a chance.
15. Make sure you let out a high pitched scream every now and then. It doesn't help your situation in the slighest, but who cares?
16. Don't smoke pot, this too is a seal of assured death.
17. Don't wander off on purpose to scare your boyfriend, only to jump out and surprise him. This will come back and bite you in the ass when the killer gets ahold of you.
18. You probably have some hidden talent you're not aware of. Such as archery or sharpshooting. Said talents will manifest during danger, so put them to use during the climactic point.
Others?
1. Don't bother with the big studly jock. He may be strong but he wont be able to do you any good when it matters.
2. Keep your clothes on. If you show your breasts, your ass or anything else, you will die.
3. Be nice. If you're the least bit *****y you will die. With the nice attitude, you have some chance of living, but barely.
4. Strike up a friendship or romance with the guy who is in good shape and at least has some intelligence. He will be able to rescue you when the psycho has you bound and gagged.
5. The only time you are allowed to panic is when the psycho has you in his clutches and the hero is coming to rescue you. Any other time and you're as good as buried.
6. When you're being pursued by the killer, never run upstairs. You won't come back down.
7. When you find your dead boyfriend, don't stand there screaming. The killer is right behind you.
8. Don't bother trying to call for help. The phone lines have been cut and your cell phone wont get a signal.
9. The police are no good. In fact, even if you manage to find one, they'll probably get shot or impaled while you're talking to them.
10. Never forget to overreact to everything.
11. Always feel something bad is going to happen.
12. Don't go investigate that noise in the backyard.
13. You can hide under the bed, table or desk. The killer usually doesn't look under there for some reason.
14. Don't stand over the supposedly dead killer for ten minutes and then run. Run immediately, and you might have a chance.
15. Make sure you let out a high pitched scream every now and then. It doesn't help your situation in the slighest, but who cares?
16. Don't smoke pot, this too is a seal of assured death.
17. Don't wander off on purpose to scare your boyfriend, only to jump out and surprise him. This will come back and bite you in the ass when the killer gets ahold of you.
18. You probably have some hidden talent you're not aware of. Such as archery or sharpshooting. Said talents will manifest during danger, so put them to use during the climactic point.
Others?
I dont like that one, lol.
