I've been Banned from Wal-Mart

[enterthemadness]

They just sent me this letter in the mail

You're my hero, Dew. This reminds me of the time I was planning on getting on the intercom speaker at K-Mart and causing utter chaos. but I backed out because I am a flying wuss.

but you have guts, And them were funny.

 

[Assassin]

its not real I got this in an email 3 years ago

 

[Danger Mouse]

My full name is Dewdrop Karma Mosenberg

Yeah. And my full name is Dan Germousenhauer.

 

[Dew k. Mosi]

Yeah. And my full name is Dan Germousenhauer.

Nice to meet you, Dan.

 

[Holly Goodhead]

My name is Sal Goldbergstein.

 

[Danger Mouse]

Nice to meet you, Dan.

Miss Mosenberg. *tips hat*

 

[Assassin]

her name is heather Knealy(sp) god damn it, yes dew i will expose your secret identity, and i've seen spiderman a few times, theres no way you or any adult for that matter would fit in a clothing rack, DEW IS A LIER!

 

[Clouseau]

i once got chased out of a K-mart, but i've never been BANNED from anywhere!

 

[Danger Mouse]

her name is heather Knealy(sp) god damn it, yes dew i will expose your secret identity, and i've seen spiderman a few times, theres no way you or any adult for that matter would fit in a clothing rack, DEW IS A LIER!

Put your money where your mouth is. Prove it.

 

[Dew k. Mosi]

her name is heather Knealy(sp) god damn it, yes dew i will expose your secret identity, and i've seen spiderman a few times, theres no way you or any adult for that matter would fit in a clothing rack, DEW IS A LIER!

Geee, you're the bright one, ain'tcha

 

[Holly Goodhead]

Ban the heretic.

 

[Assassin]

My name is Sal Goldbergstein.

Mel Gibson Hates you

 

[Holly Goodhead]

Mel Gibson Hates you

I hate his hairplugs.

 

[Assassin]

Geee, you're the bright one, ain'tcha

I'm sorry boss lady, dont ban me

 

[Assassin]

I hate his hairplugs.

why because they're not as discreat as yours?

 

[Holly Goodhead]

why because they're not as discreat as yours?

This doesnt make sense..are you implying im bald?

 

[Assassin]

maybe, kinda, yes i was.

 

[webhead731]

They just sent me this letter in the mail

lol. Those were great. I've heard some before but not all of them.

 

[Herr Logan]

They just sent me this letter in the mail

Though I refuse to use the term "lmao" in anything but an ironic manner, rest assured I am indeed laughing my ass off.

That's absolutely hilarious. Well done, Dew.

 

[Master Chief]

8. March 5, 2006: When a clerk asked if she could help her, she threw herself down on the floor, began to cry and wailed, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

I did that at a furniture store once, lol. I just wanted to look for some HDTVs and like, five different people came to me on my way to the televisions.

 

[The Amazing Lee]

They just sent me this letter in the mail

Do people ever ask you "Do you know Tyler Durden?"

 

[Ocelot]

What I find more astounding than what the things you did/didn't do, was that you have been to Wal Mart more times in those 7 documented months than I have been to in almost 2 years. I don't need to spell it out any further.

 

[redmarvel]

My question is... do you just do this stuff in Wal-Mart, or have the other stores not bothered to figure out who you are?

Either way, it was sooo funny I e-mailed it to some friends.

 

[Lord Valumart]

i like the fact that even though it's a joke i've still done some of those

i also knocked over the PSP display in GAME and the superman returns figs in Woolworths....they don;t care aslong as you run fast enough

 

[U.S War Machine]

Dew, your a little rascal