Let Freedom® Ring

Discussion in 'SHH Community Forum' started by Cho Chang, Apr 15, 2006.

  1. Cho Chang

    Cho Chang Registered

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    So, the other day I got a phone call from my rich, male, white, hetero, christian, American friend, Freedom®. He needs our help. He says he now comes in an easy to open container that can be purchased for the low, low price of $5.95 (plus all applicable taxes and souls) at your local Wal-Mart. All he asks is that we spread him all over the Earth. That doesn't sound too hard. He said that the 14 year old in Malaysia who works in the plant that manufactures the new container assured him that they were failsafe. He and his friends appearently work 16 hours a day and are under very strict regulations to ensure that each jar of Freedom® can be opened by our most frail and unused of hands. Freedom® assures me that our little malaysian pal wants nothing more than for our hands to be healthy, clean and cosmetically sound so that he and his friends can watch us sail our pretty boats, fall in love with our pretty women and drive our pretty cars. You see, he's heard so much about us and plans to buy his family a television in 9 years (he has a dream). I smiled when I heard this. I mean, imagine, all we have to do is spread Freedom®, the all-natural, all-chemical, all-encompasing seed of happiness and this young man could do anything with his future. Amazing.

    Now this being only my second encounter with Freedom®, verbaly or otherwise, I asked him a little about himself. "America" he said, "is where I am from." I asked him how he would describe himself, to which he replied; "As being American." I mentioned that in order for any ideal, thesis or definition to exist a counter-part or opposite must exist as well. He said; "I am Freedom®, my opposite must be Oppression." I asked him how he could ever expect to extinguish an idea that must remain in order for him to exist. He hung up.

    Freedom® is a word. It's an idea. It's not a sense of pride and is individual to everyone. No flag, colour, race, creed, anthem, class, sexual orientation or gender will ever define it. It cannot be spread. It cannot even be realised by many because it is, by nature, something to which we are in constant pursuit.

    Wake the **** up.


    * The word Freedom® and the capital letter F are trademarks of the United States of America and may only be used with their expressed consent. Any unauthorised use of said trademarks will result in the immediate decapitation of the offender.
     
  2. Wilhelm-Scream

    Wilhelm-Scream Registered

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    You're just jealous of our freedoms.
     
  3. JLBats

    JLBats The boney king of nowhere

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    Go... to... hell... Commie.
     
  4. Cho Chang

    Cho Chang Registered

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    Shh! *whispers* The Freedom Haters want to take away your Sharper Image gift certificate.
     
  5. pHat_aL

    pHat_aL Registered

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    Cho Chang, can I ask you a question?
     
  6. Cho Chang

    Cho Chang Registered

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    Absolutely not.
     
  7. jaguarr

    jaguarr Be Your Own Hero

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    I like how the word "Oppression" doesn't have any Rights Reserved like the word "Freedom" does.

    jag
     
  8. Wilhelm-Scream

    Wilhelm-Scream Registered

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    I like how we spread Democracy when we aren't even a Democracy. What a trick!
     
  9. Cho Chang

    Cho Chang Registered

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    Nobody claims ownership over "oppression", whereas Freedom®, as we all know, was invented by the United States of America. Give credit where it's expected.
     
  10. jaguarr

    jaguarr Be Your Own Hero

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    I like how some people are really condescending and ham-fisted about ideals on internet message boards (whether I agree with them or not).

    jag
     
  11. Cho Chang

    Cho Chang Registered

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    I like how most of us in North America can tell you who Britney Spears' husband is but don't know anything about the genocide being commited in Sudan (among other things). Thanks CNN.
     
  12. Wilhelm-Scream

    Wilhelm-Scream Registered

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    I like how everybody here likes stuff that they really dislike.
     
  13. Darthphere

    Darthphere Kneel before 'Drox!

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    I like that this dumb thread was created.
     
  14. JLBats

    JLBats The boney king of nowhere

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    I like pie.
     
  15. BBT

    BBT Registered

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    I thought Freedom costs a buck 'o five.:)
     
  16. JLBats

    JLBats The boney king of nowhere

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    I like rabbits.
     
  17. C.F. Kane

    C.F. Kane Registered

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    I like steak, medium-rare, which is my right to eat as a red blooded American Freedom lover
     
  18. Jolie_Desastre

    Jolie_Desastre Registered

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    f--ree...dddoomm? :( :confused:

    :p
     
  19. Jolie_Desastre

    Jolie_Desastre Registered

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    So, the other day I got a phone call from my rich, male, white, hetero, christian, American friend,


    this amuses me so :(
     
  20. Lackey

    Lackey Registered

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    [​IMG]

    iPod Allegra, Tootsie Fab, Fuji United Franco-American. Banana Republic, Ford Chicklets Vans, One Nathan's, Wonder Bod, Disney Vagisil, Wish Listerine, Ban Jergens Hormel.
     
  21. Carter

    Carter Registered

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    I really wish I cared enough to read that
     
  22. ampersand

    ampersand Registered

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    I have a question. Tons of people on this and other boards talk a big game when it comes to trashing Bush and America in general. Are any of you actually going out and doing something with your beliefs?
     
  23. Darthphere

    Darthphere Kneel before 'Drox!

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    Of course not.
     
  24. Carter

    Carter Registered

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    Of course not
     
  25. Carter

    Carter Registered

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