Little Willie Jokes

Discussion in 'SHH Community Forum' started by War Lord, Apr 19, 2006.

  1. War Lord Registered

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2003
    Messages:
    30,667
    Likes Received:
    0
    Little Willie, full of glee,
    Put radium in grandma's tea.
    Now he thinks it quite a lark
    To see her shining in the dark.

    Little Willie with a thirst for gore
    Nailed his mommy's baby to the door.
    Mother said with humor quaint,
    Willie dear, don't spoil the paint.

    Willie was thirsty in chemistry,
    But now he is nevermore.
    For what he thought was H2O
    Was H2SO4!

    Willie thought that life was a bore,
    So he drank some H2SO4.
    But his dad was an M.D.
    Who gave him some CaCO3.
    Now Willie's neutralized, it's true,
    But he's also full of CO2!

    Willie looking in the gun
    vPulls the trigger just for fun.
    Mother says in tones so pained,
    "Willie is so scatter-brained"

    Little Willie, wrapped in sashes,
    Fell in the fire and burned to ashes.
    Now the house grows damp and chilly,
    Because we haven't the heart to poke poor Willie.

    Little Willie, with a shout,
    Gouged his brother's eyeballs out.
    Stomped on them to make them pop.
    Mother said, "Now Willie, stop."

    Little Willie took a rocket,
    Put it in his father's pocket.
    Then he said to cousin Dan,
    "Daddy is a traveling man."

    Little Willie found a mirror,
    Went and sucked the mercury off,
    Thinking in his childish error,
    It would cure his whooping cough.
    At the funeral, Willie's mother
    Sadly said to Mrs. Brown,
    "'Twas a chilly day for Willie
    When the mercury went down."

    Little Willie, home from school,
    Where he'd learned the Golden Rule,
    Said, "If I eat all this cake,
    Sis won't get a stomach ache."

    Little Willie,
    Brand new skates
    Hole in ice
    Pearly gates

    Willie bashed open baby's head
    To see if brains are gray or red
    What a naughty boy is he
    He shall have no jam for tea.

    Willie poisoned Auntie's tea
    Auntie died in agony.
    Uncle came and looked quite vexed.
    "Really, Will," he said, "what next?"

    Little Willie, mean as hell
    Drowned his sister in the well.
    Mother said, while drawing water,
    "Gee, it's hard to raise a daughter."

    Little Willie at a passing gent
    Threw a batch of fresh cement.
    Then he said, "Wait until you dry!
    Then you'll be a real hard guy!"

    Little Willie on his bike
    Through the village took a hike.
    Mrs. Thompson blocked the walk;
    She will live, but still can't talk.

    Willie fell down the elevator,
    Wasn't found 'till six days later.
    Then the neighbors sniffed, "Gee whiz!
    What a spoiled child Willie is!"

    Willie in the cauldron fell;
    See the grief on mother's brow!
    Mother loved her Darling well,
    Willie's quite hard-boiled by now.

    Willie's cute as cute can be.
    Beneath his brother, only three,
    He lit a stick of dynamite.
    Now brother's simply out of sight.

    Willie, I regret to state,
    Cut his sister up for bait.
    We miss her when it's time to dine,
    But Willie's fish taste simply fine.

    Willie's on the railroad track
    The engine gave a squeal.
    The engineer just took a spade,
    And scraped him off the wheel.

    Little Willie hung his sister,
    She was dead before we missed her.
    Willie's always up to tricks!
    Ain't he cute? He's only six!

    Willie poisoned Father's tea.
    Father died in agony.
    Mother was extremely vexed.
    "Really, Will," she said, "what next?"

    In the family drinking well
    Willie pushed his sister Nell.
    She's there yet because it kilt her.
    Now we have to buy a filter.

    Willie with a thirst for gore
    Nailed his sister to the door.
    Mother said with humor quaint,
    "Willie dear, don't scratch the paint."

    Willie saw some dynamite,
    Couldn't understand it quite;
    Curiosity never pays:
    It rained Willie seven days.

    Little Willie fell down a drain;
    Couldn't scramble out again.
    Now he's floating in the sewer
    The world is left one Willie fewer.

    Willie coming home from school,
    Spied a dollar near a mule.
    Stopped to get it, quiet as a mouse.
    Funerals tomorrow at Willie's house.
     
  2. Tsunulia Queen of the Kitties

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2006
    Messages:
    12,224
    Likes Received:
    0
    and what might this be? are we sposd to continue?
     
  3. War Lord Registered

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2003
    Messages:
    30,667
    Likes Received:
    0
    Just read, enjoy, and comment if you want.

    If you do find other ones or can make them up, please do.
     
  4. Tsunulia Queen of the Kitties

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2006
    Messages:
    12,224
    Likes Received:
    0
    ahhh...........................cool little dittys :D
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice
monitoring_string = "afb8e5d7348ab9e99f73cba908f10802"